Send us Fan MailThe Swing Nation PodcastLifestyle Education: Top 5 Swinger Questions Answered | Episode 5In this swinger podcast episode, Dan and Lacy take the top 5 questions they get asked on TikTok and answer them for you! They talk STDs, discussing your lifestyle with your children, performance anxiety, bisexual males, and jealousy. These are the questions you ve been asking and we re here to give you answers! _______________ - The Swing Nation - Main Website Quick Navigation Website: -- (Find all our social media links more!) Follow us on Facebook! The Podcast Website_______________ - Swinger Society - Our Website to meet, connect events Swinger Society Discord Our Facebook Group_______________ - Swinger Websites - SDCUsername: TheSwingNation** Use code 36313 for 14 days free! ** SLSUsername: NorthernGuynSouthernGirl_______________ - Merch More - The Swing Nation Merch The Swinger Pride Flags Swinger Society Merch_______________ - Lacy’s Fun Links - VIP OnlyFans PREMIUM OnlyFans _______________ -- THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS -- Shameless Care: ED Medication and at home STD testingUse Code TSN at checkout for $30 off your order! Promescent® Make Love Longer, It’s Time for Great SexUse Code SwingNation for 5% off! Pinaq Liqueur; The Official Drink of The Swing NationUse Code TSN at checkout for 15% off! Non-monogamy Couples Course and Single Guy Mastery CourseUse Code ATLANTA for 50% off!Support the show- Thank you for the support! -
Transcript
This podcast is intended for adult audiences. Over the age of 18, it contains adult language and situations. The views, thoughts, and opinions expressed in this podcast belong solely to us, and not of any employer, organization, committee, or other group or individuals. This podcast is not intended to be taken as professional advice.
Welcome to the Swing Nation podcast, a podcast by swingers for swingers where we look to educate others and push back on the negative stigmas and misconceptions associated with our lifestyle come with us and share our pineapple journey as we travel the globe interview the experts learn and grow together. Join the nation. Hey there, Pineapple people, and welcome to the Swing Nation podcast. We are your hosts, Northern Guy. And Southern Girl. In today's episode, we're going to answer some questions. Yeah.
Over the last week, we've been asking for questions from TikTok and some of the people on Discord. And we've got a few emails. And we're going to try to answer some of the questions that are out there. Yeah, we get a lot of these same questions every time we go live, anytime anybody chats with us. So we thought this is a good place to kind of answer them all. Right. I think it's a good idea. We'll probably interject these questions every once in a while. Yeah. As we come up with new ones.
And I think it's also a good, you know, this will be a good episode to point people to when we get the repeated questions about the same things. Correct. I think a lot of the questions do kind of carry from last week as well from uh from secrets you're saying or no no from like how to get in the lifestyle what steps to take i think a lot of these questions oh kind of the next step yeah yeah i kind of go along with that okay uh what else i think we'll do a week in review at the end yeah and so we'll jump right into questions so So our first question actually comes from TikTok.
And it looks like it's Bree Burton is her name. And she says, how do you practice safe sex within a lifestyle, especially when you go places like Secrets Resort, where you may not know everyone that may be trying to join in? Okay. So do we want to start with, like, how do we practice safe sex first? That's a good starting point.
So, again, that safe sex question tends to come up all the time so i think let's let's address safe sex and then maybe we'll get into how you approach it you know in a club or in a that type of atmosphere so we protect ourselves like every other sexually active person should regardless of if you're in a monogamous monogamous relationship or not um if you are sexually active you should use protection hands down no questions asked and we always do that is one of our hard limits it's got to happen or it's or we're not gonna have sex with you just point blank right yeah and um it's an interesting question because i almost feel like that question gets thrown at us a lot on tiktok because people are almost trying to like shame us a little bit i think the assumption is that we have an excessive amount of partners right so how could we possibly be safe and clean right and i guess maybe we'll address a little bit of that misconception on the back of this.
But first of all, just to address the SED question, yeah. So we always use protection, condoms all the time. I've been known to carry condoms in a sock. Yeah, that stands for. If socks are the only thing I'm wearing at the time, we're very, you know, if a couple tries to, you know, do something without it, we always stop them and say something. Yeah.
And then we also get tested, you know, pretty frequently just in case, you know, something without it we always stop them and say something yeah um and then we also get tested you know um pretty frequently just in case uh you know something happens and yeah i mean we do use condoms we're also not idiots things can happen right i mean so we just take that extra precaution just to be on the safe side right and then uh i think yeah so for us it's anybody that's sexually active whether you're monogamous or non-monogamous, those are the things you should take.
I guess I get kind of frustrated because, like, when people ask that question, I want to say, well, Gigi asked so-and-so when they cheated on their wife if they used a condom.
I mean, like, I kind of get a little bit defensive because, you know, if you followed us at all, you know, we don't have a ton ton of sexual partners do we have more than a monogamous couple yes but i don't know i just it just irks me i don't know how else to say it no and i just under my skin part of me thinks that's why they're asking the question is try to try to get underneath your skin but i think also it is good for people that are coming into the lifestyle to understand that that swingers are adults um most of them are you know 30 plus majority um most of them are responsible right they're their parents they're teachers they're you know they're well educated um you know most of them have some money because you know swinging especially in the club and that kind of atmosphere cost cost money um so generally speaking i would say swingers are more health conscious of stDs and STIs than I've seen you know back when I was single and trying to you know meet girls on tinder and things like that so like as a female who obviously is not typically the one with a condom when I was you know single you know in my late teens early 20s actively dating I don't think I would stop a guy and tell him to wear a condom.
I probably should have, like, in hindsight now, but I think I was so young, so naive, not assertive, not comfortable in my own skin, I wouldn't stop a guy and say, hey, you need to use protection, where me as a 37-year-old professional educated woman will now say that. Absolutely. So just me personally, I am personally much more responsible now than I was 10 to 15 years ago. Yeah. And I think, you know, all that's relevant and, you know, I didn't print out any articles or pull up any research, but I have read a good bit on this subject and it's, it almost goes with common sense, right?
So swingers are more at risk than a monogamous couple, of course, right? But still, the highest risk people for STDs and STIs are the young, you know, I honestly think the stat was like 16 to 25-year-olds or something like that. And it's just because, you know, they feel invincible and they're probably more willing to take risks than people our age typically are.
and so i think i think that's a stigma you're learning you're growing up you're figuring it out as you go i think we've kind of passed that point in our lives yeah and it's there's also something to be said for that we're partners in this so we're kind of watching out for each other right so i think if you know if if you saw me going to do something and i didn't have a condom, you might even say, hey, babe, you know, grab that condom or something. You know what I mean?
Like we're watching out for each other, you know, so there's no like getting caught up in the moment and not really thinking about it. I mean, we're a team and everything that has to do with this. Yeah, those are all good. Any other protection, condoms, STDs, STIs?
We get a lot of questions about if clubs um right that's a good test um to go into them and we have or do people ask for you to show papers is what they call it right i personally have never been asked to show a negative std sti um report nor have i ever been asked of that to get into a club no and i don't think that's I've never seen that I don't really know that it's a thing no could it be in some circles maybe but in ours it's not I mean there definitely is a trust factor but you also have to trust your judgment you have to make good quality choices and not hook up with every single person you meet right and I think that's right the misconception is that a couple or swingers go to these events and just hook up with every single person you meet.
Right. And I think that's right. The misconception is that a couple or swingers go to these events and just hook up with anybody. Yeah. If you got a dick, you can get it in. Right. And that's so opposite. Yeah. It's so wrong. Yeah. And it's really, if you think about it, you know, it's almost like we're dating as a couple and we look for the same things you would. You know what I mean? We have conversations, we talk to people, we get to know people, we get to trust people. Correct. All the kind of the same steps you would take in a monogamous type relationship.
We kind of take those same steps. And we take them together. So we're both actively like asking questions and, you know, determining if this couple is somebody that we would want to pursue or move forward with. Yeah. And then another thing I think is worth mentioning here is most, actually, I think every club or party, maybe not the hotel parties, but maybe in the playrooms at the hotel parties, but they provide. Correct. Right. There's condoms usually on the nightstands in all the playrooms or, you know, in the public area. I mean, there's an abundance.
There's an abundance of applied condoms. You know, every guy has them in their pocket or their sock. Right. So these, um, and I suggest even the women carry them. I mean, I know a lot of times I don't have a purse, but if I do have a small bag or something, I think it's important for me to have them as well in case I decide to do something. And I don't think it's the responsibility of the man.
think all parties involved are responsible for using protection absolutely but yeah i just wanted to point out that they they usually are readily available at clubs and parties and things yeah you can even take a pocket full home yeah usually we don't buy condoms very often yeah yeah but anyway uh what else anything else on no so now they they want to know how do you handle protection in places like secrets or clubs or stuff like that? So first, let me just say this. No one is going to join you without consent. Right. Point blank. So let's just talk about that first.
So it's, you know, take away the condoms, take away all that.
No one can join your adventures, let's just adventures let's just say without consent a lot of times like if you heard about Dan and I's secrets we went to the playroom and just played him and I we did play in an open area which kind of is a simple like when you play open in an open area you are inviting people to watch and possibly even join however they don't just like hop in and start going to town they kind of sit with you they might touch your shoulder they might you know but they're gonna ask for your consent they better ask yeah and if they don't you have a problem and you need to get security i don't think we've ever had anybody i mean some people might be a tad pushy like rubbing on you and stuff but if you sit up and say no thank you they will back off right yeah and that's so i guess i think where you're going with that is if somebody approaches you and says is it okay if i play with you or join you you would simply you know if they seemed like they weren't going to use protection you would say you would just say hey do you have a condom or get a condom or if you're not interested say no thank you no thank you yeah um but again just like dan said before there are condoms readily available everywhere especially in the play yeah especially in the playroom so if if it's someone that you are interested in you know having sex with or whatever you're doing you would just stop them and say you have a condom right make sure you grab a condom or something yeah something like that yeah or put a condom on let's go at it baby yeah so it really is however you want to handle it i mean it doesn't have to be awkward we get a lot of questions like all the time like is it awkward after is it you know it's only awkward if you make it awkward right and i think you know you get used to you know like when you're first starting out everything feels awkward and then as you know as you have a few experiences it gets less awkward yeah because that's something i've probably like just like i said in my early 20s that's something i've probably struggled with being assertive and stopping and saying right please get a condom or you know that's something that i doesn't come naturally to me i have to work at it i have to make myself be a responsible adult and stop yeah even though i want them to use a condom i'm just really bad about not speaking how i'm feeling so i have to purposely make myself do that yeah so i mean for anybody listening that's definitely don't be afraid to speak up yeah don't be afraid i've had to learn right if those you know it should be something that you use for your protection and you shouldn't be afraid to to bring that up yeah and we say all this are there swinger out there is that may not possibly this is just two people this is our experience and this is how we do it right yeah and i think we talked a little bit on one of our episodes we've only ever played with one couple and not use protection and now that was some lifelong friends they are lifelong friends and we prior to any playtime or anything like that like i think it was completely sober completely vanilla conversation we made the decision that going forward we wouldn't have to wear condoms because we do have that trust level you're right with that one couple yeah yeah so all right okay does that does that crush uh stds stis and those questions can i add one more thing i was just on love and somebody asked me if i contracted an sti would i stop swinging and i was really taken back by that that was a question that that was a question like well first of all i'm not going to infect anyone right so i would obviously stop and i would yeah i would get things taken care of i was just kind of shot by that question yeah that is that is i guess seems like a common sense answer well yeah because we're responsible i think many people think we're just like blubbering idiots but like we're responsible grown adults of course we would stop of course we're not going to put anybody else's life in danger for our own personal benefit right i just was kind of shocked by that yeah okay we're moving on i think so you got anything else on that no i think we killed that i think we crushed it we answered it the same way we always answer it but but just for the podcast for the list yeah a little bit more in depth yeah All right.
So our next question is, again, from TikTok. And this is J and D from North Cal. And it says, one really common problem for my girl is a lot of the men seem to have performance issues. The second protection is included. And then have you seen, and then the question is, have you guys encountered that? Same girl.
Same girl think we as a female part of this i can agree with that we crushed the protection part of that but i think it is worth talking about the whole male uh performance anxiety issues yeah it happens um common it's very common to be honest with you yeah it's happened to us right on our end right so we we talk about this again this is another question that comes up a lot in in our lives uh and so you know we've promised you to be completely honest on uh just about everything that i asked dan before we got on here i was like how honest are we gonna be okay if we talk about this yeah no and it's completely fine so if you think about you know especially the the demographics right so men that are getting 30s and 40s and and plus and then you think about the environment I don't know.
No, and it's completely fine. So if you think about, you know, especially the demographics, right? So men that are getting 30s and 40s and plus. And then you think about the environment that you're in, right? So a lot of these clubs and parties, you know, you're drinking a lot. Not to say that you have to, but it's very common to be drinking a lot. And you're up late, right? So you're usually up to 2, 3, 4 o'clock in the morning sometimes.
um it's you know and usually it's later in the night when if anybody does play when that kind of uh stuff happens alcohol alcohol is involved and then in addition to that it's often there's other people watching there's you know at least one other couple in the room yeah um stage fright right so there is there there is performance anxiety uh there is that whole alcohol factor there is the whole just being tired and exhausted and maybe not in a you know at the ready so to speak yeah so yeah so it's very common um i think we've had it uh i can think of one time that i know maybe two that what um that the soldier wasn't working for me personally yeah no so it's happened to me at least no no no at least two times are you under the bus i'm saying is out of the times we've played oh it comes up a lot of times where at least a male that's involved yeah has those issues yeah um so you know again complete transparency i i do use viagra um and i Sorry, the dog just drowned.
She doesn't like Viagra, apparently. But only for...
complete transparency i i do use viagra um and i sorry the dog just drowned she doesn't like viagra apparently um but only for swinging right just to kind of and it's i think it's more of a like peace of mind right i don't have to think about it if i take a and i have heard some of the other swinger podcast people talk about this but you know i take a viagra and i am good to go and i'm ready at a moment's notice and there's no issues i don't have to think about it i think it is almost a placebo kind of effect for me that i know what if once i've taken it that i don't have to worry about it so i don't kind of get inside my own well and we definitely i can tell like since you started taking it we don't have to worry about it which and it takes some pressure off of me too because if there are the times that you couldn't yet hard, and both times were like amazingly hot women, I felt like I was worried about you.
I felt like I needed to help you. I felt – so it kind of helps my experience too in a selfish way there.
So what I would encourage is if guys that are out there, especially lifestyle guys, if you've ever had that issue or that problem, even if it's's because that's really for me it's the only time i ever take it is in that lifestyle type environment when we when we do events um to just go go talk to a doctor it's an uncomfortable conversation it is super awkward but it's worth it totally 100 worth it um and on the flip side of that uh i think even maybe for you girls seem to take it personally they do so i guess let me chat on that um it is hard when your husband is going to town you know having the time of his life over there with the wife and you're with the husband and he's trying he's trying so hard and it's not working.
I mean that you do take it personally. In hindsight, do I know that it's not me? Yes, absolutely. But when you're in that moment and you're just trying and you're doing all you can do to help it get up and it's not, it's hard to just know that. I will say though, I have had guys that have had that issue, and we still had an amazing night, right? It's all about the man's mindset. Like, if it's not working, okay, let's move on. There's plenty of stuff we can do without that, right?
I mean, I had this one guy who made me cum a whole lot when it didn't work, and honestly, it was one of the best nights with a man that we've had. um and then i've had guys that it didn't work and it just all fell apart because his ego was bruised had guys that it didn't work and it just all fell apart because his ego was bruised and you know, he didn't handle it well. So I just kind of throw that out there for the guys to know that it's okay. Right. It happens. Um, it's all in what you do with it. Right.
And I think that is a good point that if, if you are a swinger or new to swinging and you do encounter that, the best thing to do is just keep doing other things. Like, don't stop and focus on it and make it into a whole big thing. Just do what you can and enjoy yourself and don't worry about it and move on. Correct. Yeah. It's all in how you handle it. And then go make an appointment with a doctor. You'll be ready to go. And if you're a girl and your partner, whether it be your husband or somebody else, has an issue like that with you, it's not because you're not beautiful.
It's not because you're not sexy. It's not because they don't want you. It's just probably the alcohol and the anxiety. And I really encouraged you to go get Viagra. You did, yeah. I mean, because you're a man and you have pride and you were just like i'm good i got you know and i was just like babe just you don't have i know it's an uncomfortable conversation you don't want to do this it's weird but just think it's 10 minutes of weird uncomfortableness and then we can go and have all the bitches. Yeah, absolutely.
So, you know, so ladies, I would say, I mean, obviously you don't want to like hound the guy, make him feel less than, but there's ways to encourage it. And ultimately, I think it makes for a far better experience. Right. When everybody's. Everybody's working. Everybody's working on all cylinders. Everybody's working, yeah. Absolutely. Yep. So I think that's, that's our advice on that.
that any other as far as male performance or just guys in general no i think that's good all right then this is another we're going to move on to sean who emailed us and this is kind of another male centric question but it's are single males welcome in the lifestyle and then it says what about by males do you want me to start yeah you start i think males in the lifestyle get a bad rap however more of our friends play with single males than anything else yeah and that's so it's hard for me it's like i get where they where they get a bad rap but at the same time i'm like but the people that's giving them a bad rap are the ones that's hooking up with them no well yeah so i think it is a hundred percent true that there is a place for single males in the lifestyle hands down correct and i also think it's true that there are more single males that are active and playing in the lifestyle than there probably are single females correct um but there is this misconception that one single males aren't wanted in the lifestyle but they're but to be fair they gain that reputation because there's an abundance of them in a large portion of them are not even lifestyle people yeah they're just doing it they're going about it completely the wrong way and ruining it for everybody else, right?
I agree. So these thirsty guys that are hopping on websites, emailing a bunch of people because they're trying to get hooked up with somebody that night. Make the bad rap. Or they're married and they're lying, or they make plans with a couple and then they don't show up, or they use the wrong pictures of their know, whatever the case may be. There's just a lot of guys that are playing games within the lifestyle. I agree. And that overshadows probably the quality men that are actually lifestyle guys trying to have a good time.
But like you said, there absolutely is a place for single males in the lifestyle. Yeah, a our friends play single male. Plenty of couples that are looking for that. Um, so full discretion, right? We, I think we talked about this. I was a single male in the lifestyle for a couple of years. Um, and what I will say to the single males that are out there and looking to get in the lifestyle, be patient, right?
Get a profile on SLS, get a profile on SDC, fill that profile out, take pictures email couples well written you know thought out messages um follow up on those messages um if you schedule a play date or say you're going to meet somebody for drinks or whatever the case may be actually show up and do it yeah if you're a married guy or if you have a girlfriend or if you're not you know legitimate then don't don don't do it. You know what I mean? There's no point. I think it's so easy for guys to throw a profile up and claim to be swingers.
I mean, I think it's a lot harder for a couple to have that conversation, make a profile, move forward, as well as single females, just because the stigma around girls being, for women, being whores and easy. Right.
So I think that's why there are so many men men just because it's so easy for men right yeah no that's true um so you know you got to play if you were single male and looking to play with couples you really have to play the long game take your time you know good good profiles and then you know once you establish yourself in the lifestyle once you meet a couple couples once you have a good time with them once you get you know certified on sls um you know word will kind of get around that you're you're somebody that's worth a couple spending their time with and uh i think once i did it for a while and kind of got to know a few couples uh you know i was didn't have many problems you know meeting couples when i traveled and doing that so I think that would be my advice to single males yeah and then read the profiles we have currently on our profile single males if we want you we'll reach out to you and that doesn't stop them no it doesn't stop they just keep on and keep on and keep on if you're going to want to get anywhere with a couple you need to read their profile you need to be able to be respectful and if obviously if you're not reading the profile and you're just immediately sending a message then that shows you're not respectful in my opinion not respectful of our time of what we want our boundaries right no 100 now more specifically he asks about um by males in the lifestyle and i'll touch on this um not because i have a lot of experience into it but when i was a single male um looking to play with couples um if you go on sls or sdc or any of these websites you'll see the vast majority majority of these couples are listed as either straight and straight, which is probably, what, 20 percent?
And then there's 10 percent that are by and by. But about the other 70 to 80 percent of couples are where the male is listed as straight and the female is listed as by. Right.
That's probably the most prevalent profiles that are out there i will say of those couples there's probably about 50 um after initial contact with me as a single male at some point in time during the conversation they would bring up whether i was bi comfortable or comfortable with male-on-male play or comfortable you know um dabbling in that that part of the lifestyle um so you know i would always answer very frankly like no that's not really my thing it's not what i'm looking for i'm not interested and they were always super respectful of that but my only point of bringing that up is that i think there are more bi males in the lifestyle than we really that than that put out there that they are yeah and i almost feel like that's unfortunate because i wish that they could be honest right yeah there's there's you know if 50 of the couples that reached out to me the male was by if they all just put that they're by in their in their profiles i think they're afraid of being judged yeah and i think you know i don't want to call out bang bang pineapple gang but he he talks about it openly on his podcast that you know that he's a bi male and and i think he he's talked about the stigma associated with it and again being a sex positive person i do think it's a shame that if there is bi males in the lifestyle and are open you know and want that type of interaction i wish they could just be more open about it well the cool thing about being a swinger is it's a very non-judgmental space until you get to that that's about the only thing that i can Thank you.
of interaction i wish they could just be more open about it well the cool thing about being a swinger is it's a very non-judgmental space until you get to that that's about the only thing that i can think of that is judged in the lifestyle well and not kissing right oh yeah you know um yeah i judge that but realistically i mean swingers are pretty open just about anything whatever your kink might be whatever you're into but for some reason the buy males just feel very like ashamed to put that out there and i think i think they would do their self a justice if they were just honest up front i agree 100 and uh so i guess sean to answer your question there there are buy males in the lifestyle and some are very open and honest about it i'd say the most of the by males are probably not comfortable sharing that until they get to know you yeah and that's we've heard that not just from us multiple couples that we are friends with or played with have told similar stories yeah 100 yep um moving on.
Right. The next question. You want to read it? Go ahead. Oh, okay. Everyone on TikTok always asks us this question, so we didn't find a user, but they all ask it. Do your kids know? Do your kids know? Yeah. Yeah. We give this every single live about six or seven times, if not more. It's weird to me that people are so obsessed with knowing if our kids know that we're swingers or not. Yeah. It is definitely like a- It's definitely a thing. People are interested in that question, and I don't know if it's because it's- Thank you.
to me that people are so obsessed with knowing if our kids know that we're swingers or not it is definitely like a it's definitely a thing people are interested in that question and i don't know if it's because it's it's something they worry about if they're getting into the lifestyle you know that being or if it's coming across judgmental what are what are their meaning behind asking it i don't know right but so for us we have i think we talked about this in our first episode but if you missed that one i have high school aged children and lacy has a middle-aged uh son so i have a boy and a girl they're high school aged and she has a middle school age son and so for us our older two are aware and do know they found our tiktoks just to be super transparent they were able to find our our tiktoks before we had them blocked which is our mistake excuse the dog she won't stand to pet her um which that was our mistake we should have blocked them right we were not even thinking that they wouldn't see it yeah so we should have blocked them right yeah but but to be honest so that happened and then we ended up i had a good conversation i think with that.
And it kind of, she was embarrassed by it, but it almost turned into like a joke. Like once she figured, I mean, the good thing about. She's 17. Right. She's almost 18. So she is basically an adult. I thought she handled it very well. No, she absolutely did. And I think, you know, I think we think, you know, I think we grew up in a different era in this world where people were more judgmental and where people weren't as open and honest about sexuality and that kind of stuff.
And I think for her, it's more just like, she's like, dad, I didn't want to, like, if I was going to find this, I didn't want to find it on TikTok, but like, honestly, I don't care what you do. Like, you know what I mean? But she has multiple transgender friends, gay, lesbian, you know, friends. Right. So just to hear about our sex life, yes, it's uncomfortable. Nobody wants to hear about their parents' sex life. But I think in a way she kind of understood. Right. And honestly, I think she connected with you a little bit more.
I think so, too she we had a common interest right we had some common interest and she was like pretty awesome about it every time she saw the pineapple she would be like elbowing us like oh my god um she's like i can't unsee the pineapple i thought she did exceptionally well i mean when your kids find out about something like this like we kind of were like oh crap here we go no yeah i mean there's the fear that they'll be upset and you know like all the fears that you know anybody in the lifestyle has had about their kids finding out we've had all those fears as well um but i think it is important to remember that this isn't 1995 anymore and our kids are being raised in a generation where like sex positive sex positive, accepting of all genders, race, all of that is, like, pretty much pushed down their throats.
Right. So, I think they're a lot more open to differences. Right. Which I think is great. Yeah, I agree. That's wonderful. It's awesome. I think that's kind of how we both appraised our children to, like, love each other and not care what someone looks like or what they choose, you know. So I think it kind of, in this case, it kind of shows that we've done a good job. Right. And then the middle schooler doesn't know. Correct. I really get pissed off about this question. I don't know how else to say it without cussing. Because my son is 11 years old.
He is not of age to know anything about our sex life at all. Right. He doesn't really understand sexuality. He's learning. He's figuring it out. And I've had age-appropriate conversations with him about sex, and he's went through sex education at school. But to openly say Dan and I have sexual intercourse with other couples every so often would not be an age appropriate conversation. I agree. Whatsoever. And I personally get a little bit frustrated when people ask that. I'm like, well, do you tell your 11 year old son when you suck your husband's dick on the weekends?
Like you come in there and be like, let me tell you what I'm doing with your daddy. No. Right. Nobody's going to do that. Yeah. I do get, I do get that we are putting our business out on a public platform. So obviously, that's where these questions come from. So I get it, right? Will my son find our TikTok? Will he find our website? And the answer is maybe. He might. I have him blocked from everything that I possibly can block him from. But realistically, we know that there is a chance that he's going to come across of it. Right. Or his friend or somebody's going to let something.
A distant relative is going to drop the bucket. Yeah, somebody's going to let it slip. We know that. Or do it on purpose just out of spite. Yeah, yeah. And especially how our family and everything has found out, the chances of that are pretty damn high. Because people have kind of themselves crappy to be in my opinion so yeah but um i try really hard to keep my tiktoks as peachy 13 as possible you don't see me in skimpy clothes i mean i might wear crop top every so often or spaghetti strength that to be it. There's no bathing suits. There's no anything like that.
Obviously, TikTok takes down my TikToks if I have a sweater and shorts on. So I can't even get away with it if I wanted to. We also try to keep the subject matter as PG-13 as it can. Obviously, we're swingers, so it can only be as pg-13 as it can but we don't just put it out there like for instance today we posted a tiktok and it's says something like getting when your parents ask you why you're going to nashville for the weekend and it's got pineapples or something like that if my son saw that he one would have no idea what the pineapples would mean.
And he would be like, Mom, why are you going to Nashville this weekend? And then I would have a conversation with him. His bigger question would be, why do you have so many followers on TikTok and I didn't know? Yeah. How did you get so many followers? I want, show me, Mom. Teach me. Yeah, so, I mean, realistically, will he find out? Probably.
No, I mean i mean i think we 100 expect that he either will find out or we'll tell him and but what we're hoping is he's more like 17 18 at the time and we can have a more appropriate yeah even 15 or 16 right um even when he does find out i'm not going just like with your daughter we didn't say, oh, let me tell you about all the things that we did or we do. It wasn't a conversation like that. It was, you know, just like we struggle with monogamy and this is something that we do that helps our relationship and makes, you know, everything work better for us.
And again, if that conversation needs to happen, it will absolutely happen. and we're ready for it i mean doing tiktok lives doing these podcasts all this is just really prepared us for if nothing else you you guys have got us prepared to answer questions when we when we go live and get bombarded with correct so um i mean once you've had the conversation with your parents and your ex-husband and ex-wives and stuff, I mean, you can kind of – We can teach a class. Yeah. So, does that answer that? I think that answers most of that, right? So, our kids are 50-50 on whether they know or not.
The older ones do know and actually are pretty supportive and understanding and and great about it and the middle schooler when that time comes uh we'll we'll approach that issue uh as we need to yeah correct all right moving on to uh i think this is gonna be our last question you want to go ahead and read it out everyone on tiktok wants to know do we get jealous do we get jealous that's probably that's up there stds and jealousy are probably the two and kids i think that's like the top three right yeah um so what do you let's talk about it i think we've actually talked about this a little bit in some of the other episodes but i get jealous do you get jealous did you listen to the last podcast what makes you jealous um honestly it's more my own insecurities than it is anything else um we're humans we're super duper in love um i want you to think i'm the number one girl in all the land so well you are babe thank you i know but sometimes things get to us right i mean it's just right human nature yeah well and i think that's important that we humans.
We're emotional creatures. And yeah, sometimes when you see your wife or your husband doing something intimate with another person, and a lot of times the things that trigger the jealousy are not the things you would think, right? Yes. So stupid. It's not the sex. It's the sweet peck on the cheek or the- Or he pushed her hair back. Right. Brushing's hair to the side or, you know, like. Or he kissed her, like, super passionately. Right, rubbing their back or, you know, all these little intimate-y things that aren't really sex-related. Yeah.
But they just kind of come across as, like, sweet or not, you know, like, kind. I think those are the kind of things.
I think sometimes, you know, and I think it's a good point to say that like if we're irritated about other things especially like in the texting realm and things like that like if i'm just irritated at you for whatever reason because you spent a bunch of money on amazon or buying clothes or whatever you did and i'm irritated and then like i'm trying to talk to you and you're on your phone texting on snapchat you know like then i'll be like oh you you pay more attention to your guys than you do to me you know or something like that there's also been times that i'm like cooking dinner or running errands or at the grocery store and my kick is like and you're just like having a good old time with somebody's wife and i'm like listen here i'm out getting groceries for the family and you're just sweet talking this girl you know so i mean he didn't do anything wrong per se he followed all of our rules and boundaries i'm just in a pissy mood because i'm at the grocery store no and you're at home on the couch with your legs propped up texting texting all the ladies yeah yeah so i think you know i've seen swinger couples say oh we just don't get jealous it's just we're not we're just not like that just me personally if i ever don't get jealous you probably should be worried right yeah to me yeah if you love somebody and care about somebody you know sharing your partner with other people is gonna create some type of jealousy right and maybe they're just like oh we don't get like jealous and fight you know i mean like i get it you know i think we don't really get jealous and bite we get jealous and communicate right and i think that's an important distinction yeah um and then i immediately tell you if i'm jealous like in the moment you mean you shout jealous in the middle of everybody knows in the middle of coffee i'm communicating in the middle of us all fucking but it's people that know me and don't care i mean if it was well i take that back that one couple did not know us very well but whatever lisa gets a few drinks she don't give a shit i don't care um but yeah i mean i almost immediately tell you you probably wait until like we're alone or the next day to tell me um but i would say just don't let too much time pass because then you like harbor those feelings and it's going to come out with something else Let's do it.
day to tell me um but i would say just don't let too much time pass because then you like harbor those feelings and it's going to come out with something else um but we just immediately talk about it yeah so for us um just having a conversation usually the next day because you know that night you might be drunk and it's you know it's not much point talking about it but the next day say hey babe when you you know i think i used to brushing the hair last time but maybe, you know, when you laid there and cuddled with her and, you know, it's not much point in talking about it.
But the next day, say, hey, babe, when you, you know, I think I used to brushing the hair last time. But maybe, you know, when you laid there and cuddled with her and, you know, massaged her back for 10 minutes after. Or came in her mouth. Or came in her mouth. That's an inside. Well, okay, like that's a story to be told. So Dan and I hadn't saw each other for like a few days. And we met at this party.
And the girl super hot and he was just really enjoying her and he just straight up just came in her mouth and she just took it off it was really hot but I don't typically do that you know I mean that's kind of a it's your birthday kind of thing not necessarily a Tuesday night kind of thing and so I was jealous even though Now nowhere in our boundaries does it say that Dan cannot come in her mouth. Never. But it bothered me a little. If anything, I think you probably encouraged that. Yeah, because they do it, not me. But just in that moment, I was human and I was just like, hey. Yeah.
Well, I think it was more that we had been apart. Yeah. But talked about it you know immediately and well not immediately i think we talked about it like once we got back to our room in the next morning um but that's just one of those things like he didn't do anything wrong he did exactly what he was supposed to he's there to have hot she certainly didn't do anything wrong. But I got insecure. Yeah. So, yeah. Yeah. So I think, again, just to kind of wrap up the jealousy thing, it does happen. I think what it comes down to 99% of the time is our own insecurities.
It's something within ourself that we are, you know, self-conscious about something or we think somebody else is doing something better or they're enjoying something more with somebody than we are uh in reality we want that right i want you to enjoy um that's what we're here for your time with other people right uh it's just you know again it's a self-reflection reflection thing and it's a communication thing so having that open conversation with your spouse and saying what made you jealous because again maybe next time you can avoid you can avoid it.
If it's something little like brushing somebody's hair to the side, like I don't need to do that during when we're swinging. Not that I don't think that was a thing. Was that a thing? I think that was kind of a little thing one time we had. I don't know. I don't remember. Possibly. Yeah. How old would it have asked me? Well, and the other thing about all this is we, that evolves, right? What made you jealous a year ago probably isn't going to make you jealous now, right? Correct, correct. And what made me jealous today might not make me jealous next week.
I mean, like if we've been together all week and she wants to swallow your cum, by all means, go for it, girl.
If we haven't been together for a week, I might have it's just it's it's just part of it and i a quick conversation open communication will really alleviate a lot of stress that that may cause yeah so i think that's it i think that's uh probably stop at at five but those are probably some of the most um common questions we get asked yeah over and over we tried to answer them as openly and as frankly i think you know we've got a lot of comments on our podcast that oh we really like how like just open you guys are like how much you know like you just have a frank conversation and tell it tell how it is there's not any reason to right and i think i think you do see some of that with swinging where people especially in the you know this podcast realm where people kind of try to give the correct answer well give the correct answer or just make it you know i don't know showy almost you know like you know church it up a little you know however you want to say it like you know refine it a little bit yeah where i think we just want to be open and honest and 100 where we we're good at something, we may be crappy at another.
We're just learning and growing as we go. We're not perfect. Just two people trying to do this. All right. So let's talk. I guess let's do the weekend review. Okay. So what have we been up to this last week? I went out of town. You did. You left me. I did. You left me with all the dogs. And all the social media. I unplugged from Thursday through Sunday, and it was amazing. You probably don't want to say what you were doing. I went to Vermont. Let's just leave it at that. I went to Vermont to a place where there was no Wi-Fi and no cell signal.
So I didn't really have a choice but to unplug, but very much was excited to do it. You know how many social media accounts and stuff that we manage. I mean, we do divide and conquer a lot of things, but it's still a lot on both of us individually. So I was really excited. This trip I do every year with my mom and my son.
So I was really excited to go and and unplug and it really did my soul some good um i love tiktok i love snout with everyone but it just did me some good to really unplug for a little bit and kind of get a little bit of a break but i'm back and better than ever with a crazy week i know i told dan today he texted me at lunch and i was like uh i went from like home doing that thing to um craziness yeah like went right back into it yeah i think that is worth saying i don't think people will realize like to manage tiktok to manage only fans to manage your snapchat to manage you know and we work full-time jobs work full-time jobs and we travel back and forth you know the podcast yeah um that takes a lot i mean it is like working another full-time job on top of correct and then i have my sons in sports and it's just it's a lot yeah it's a lot of work if you email us or if you you know message lacy on one of her social medias and she doesn't get back to you um it's not because she doesn't want to no it's because there literally are yeah like people on snapchat sometimes are like ask me a question and then i'll respond and they'll ask me something else i have no idea what they're talking about because it doesn't save your comp your conversation and i'm like what because i literally have 5 000 people on there messaging me every day and it takes a lot of of work.
Right. Yeah. So, yeah. So, it was nice. I hate that you didn't get to go. Wanted you to go. But it just didn't work out. But thank you for the much needed vacation. You're welcome. And welcome. Thanks for holding down the fort while I was gone. Do some work. Make some TikToks. Let's take some pictures. So, yeah. Another big news this week is you broke the 1%. Yeah, it was like 0.91% today or yesterday. 0.91, I think, was the last number I saw. And this is on OnlyFans. If anybody's not clear what we're talking about. Yeah, big deal. So she is the top 1% of OnlyFans. Less than 1%.
Let's put that less in there.
Well, yeah, well, if you're the top 1%, you're less than i thought you meant like top like i could be 1.9 you could say well that's technically top two percent but yeah well i still would call it one percent technically one you're in the one percent yeah i got you less than one percent um yeah does that feel good you you were pushing for that that was a goal of yours yeah it was a goal of mine now i don't know how long we'll stay in there but i don't know only fans has kind of dipped down a little bit if you know from our history with tiktok um our tiktok was banned on the second of this month and this account just really has struggled um our only fans stuff like that is direct correlation to tiktok so if t TikTok slows down, the rest slow down.
So it's kind of slowed down a bit. It has, yeah. So we may make a new TikTok. To be determined, stay tuned. Yeah. We're trying to stay one punch ahead of the sensors, right? We're trying to decide that. Yeah, so unfortunately, when TikTok bans you or shadow bans you or whatever. It's hard to tell. Yeah, it's hard to tell and your IP will get flagged. So, it's not just like, oh, let's just make a brand new account and keep going. No, they know who you are. They're after you. So, you know, it involves new phones, stuff like that. Like, this is all the behind the scenes stuff.
When we say it takes a lot to manage all this this is the decisions that we're making um do we go get a new phone do we not do we start a new snap or do we start a new tiktok do we not it's yeah well this one's really weird because it's not it's not that you're not getting like we had that one account that was shadow banned and it had like no traction i mean you couldn't you go live and you'd have like 10 people in the room you post a video yeah it's almost like it's just slow but is it just because we haven't had a video hit or is it did tiktok do something to us yeah so that's why we haven't like jump shift on this one we're kind of waiting it out i mean not to mention the iphone 13 comes out friday right that's i think the plan is to see see what we can do with this account and then once the new once it's time to upgrade phones we might make a decision at that point yeah so that's kind of where we are with tiktok it's to see what we can do with this account.
And then once it's time to upgrade phones, we might make a decision at that point. Yeah. So that's kind of where we are with TikTok. It's kind of slow, but that's okay. The cool thing is that we have kind of combined forces with Christina and Malia, our Swing Talk ladies. Yeah. And so the cool thing is we can all help each other.
So when one gets banned or shadow banned or is down, the others kind of pull the weight of the other which is really nice um to have kind of a support system yeah so we'll talk about that a little bit so uh malia who is snm 416 on tiktok and then christina which is tiktok girl christina i think she's still on 5.0 at this point in time they're you know pretty big swinger accounts on tiktok and we've kind of teamed up and they've kind of joined the nation so to speak um so they're on our website we have all their information all their links all their bios um if you're on our discord you already know who they are i mean we do tiktok lives with them we just kind of aligned ourselves with them and is working more as a team than individually and honestly it kind of helps all of us um like for instance i'm back and malia's not feeling well today so i can help or i was out this weekend and they kind of pulled the slack for me so it's it's nice to not have all the pressure just on the two of us right so it's kind of you know those three big tiktok accounts working together trying you know getting people to come to our website getting people to go to only fans getting people to go to the podcast uh you know it's it's just nice to have that that community of like-minded people all working together in one direction correct and with that we're actually going to go meet them this weekend in nashville excited so we are meeting um the two couples we're all staying together in a pretty awesome place and we are going to chemistry in nashville chemistry nashville we've never been which is a swingers club yep uh we're going saturday night we're going so if you're listening this it's obviously thursday but if you're in the general area and want to come with us come on people ask all the time where are we going how can we meet y'all well this is an occasion where you can come and you can meet us um you do have to register through their website which is chemistrygold.com i will put it in the show notes yeah thanks damn um you do have to register through their website kind of create a profile and then you pay for your tickets and then you can rsvp the awesome thing is Chemistry gave us a coupon code, which is TALKSWING, T-O-K-S-W-I-N-G.
Dan will obviously put that in the show notes so you can read that and get all that information. But it gives you 10% off. 10 or 20% off, which is $12. Right. So instead of costing $60, it's $48. $48, yeah. But yeah, you can come and see us. We'll all be there. It's fetish night, so bring your black leather. Fetish night. And your whips and come on. Right. You got a cute little... Are you wearing that? Do you know? Have you decided? It was delivered today at my house.
I've not tried my outfit on, but yeah, I've got like a cute leather romper that laces up the sides., it's some… Going with thigh-high boots? Thigh-high boots. I've never worn them. This is a first for me. So, honestly, they might not even go over my leg. So, that is to be determined. I will go back to black heels if they don't work. But, yeah, that's what we're doing.
We we've got some awesome outfits and matching lingerie and stuff to do some amazing content with the ladies and the guys so yeah so we're gonna meet up friday night we're probably we're just gonna hang out and get to know them friday night saturday you know we're gonna be on broadway street nashville just just tearing it up so if you're glitter cowboy boots you're on broadway street on saturday you might see the swing talk girls just kind of running around taking pictures doing tiktoks um certainly come up and say hi if you see us out there and then saturday night we will be at club chemistry in nashville use code talk swing to get in correct and let them know you're with us yeah there was already 75 people rsvp'd as of monday night so you know obviously if you're hearing this on thursday if you want to come you probably need to get on that and get that schedule get registered yeah get a schedule i'm trying to sell them out maybe i don't know how many people will they let in the club i don't know we'll see what happens but if you're not on our snapchat definitely add me it's swinging s girl two two um which will also be in the show notes or you can find on our website.
You'll get to see all the fun behind-the-scenes shenanigans. And if you want to be a premium member, that's where you find me there, too. So premium members pay a monthly fee, but they get the good stuff. All the behind-the-scenes. All the behind-the-scenes. Uncensored. Yeah. All right. Yeah. What else? I think that's it. Hedo in a month. Hedo in a month. Yeah. Yeah. We're really excited about Hedo. We were concerned with the COVID levels and work approvals and stuff, but we're good to go. Good to go. 100%. 100%. So we'll talk more about that as we get closer, but I think that's it. One month.
All right. Okay. Anything else? I think that that's it all right guys we appreciate you joining again uh us again this week um honestly the podcast has been doing fantastic thank you very much like over over 5500 downloads and i don't that's just downloads and the views were crazy i don't even know i haven't even had the time to go to all the websites and check the view numbers but they're tens of thousands of people i think think. That's awesome. So if you like our podcast and you want to live as a five-star review, you screenshot it and send me a picture of that on my Snapchat.
I will send you a special prize. Special prizes. It's a good one. For reviews, yeah. Yeah. All right. So remember, folks, in a world full of apples. Be a pineapple, be a pineapple, guys. Bye. If you've enjoyed our podcast and want to support us, leave a five star review wherever you're listening. If you want to see more of our content, you can find links to Snapchat, Twitter, Instagram, OnlyFans and more in the show notes. Come join the conversation with us and other Swinger content creators on our Swinger Society Discord server.
If you have questions or feedback, email them to us at theswingnation at gmail.com. Make sure you head on over to theswingnation.net and keep up to date on all things Swing Nation. We thank you so much for joining us, and we'll see you next time. Goodbye.
