You d think that finding a bull would be the easy part of establishing or maintaining a sexy and fun cuckolding relationship right? Well it s not easy at all. In fact this is one of the biggest complaints that couples have in this lifestyle - having difficulty finding the right bull for their relationship. This episode will give couples some solid advice on how to find the right bull for you, how to avoid the disasters, where to look, and how you ll know when you ve found the right one. LinksVenus Cuckoldress WebsiteVenus Connections - matchmaking for loving cuckolding relationshipsMaison De Neige CoutureKey Barrett on TwitterASN Magazine - Venus feature: When the lifestyle turns terrifyingFull Swap Radio - listen to Venus every Tuesday at 5pm and 11pm Central TimeNew Merch! - yeah you read that right! Now you can get Venus/Cuckolding inspired merch!Submit a question for the showPillow Talks - find out how you can register for these live events with Venus and friends!Become a Patreon supporter - support the podcast and get lots of perks! Including the Venus Vault!Venus on TwitterVenus on InstagramVenus on YouTubeVenus on FacebookDestination Links for Venus - https://linktr.ee/venuscuckoldressLearn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices❤️Venus Connections❤️ - Matchmaking for loving cuckolding relationships and female-led relationships. Learn more at https://www.venusconnections.com/ Give her what she wants 💦 🍆 the Thrum - triple the pleasure, feel the difference 🤤 BUY NOWDestination Links for Venus - https://lnk.bio/VenusPodcast
Transcript
Hey, are you looking for a hot wife? Maybe you're looking for a cuckold relationship. Then you need to join Venus Connections matchmaking service. It's totally private, it's fun blind dates, and all members are vetted. And it works. There was even a wedding last year and there'll be another one next year. It's definitely hard to find your life partner. I know. And it's even harder to find this kind of relationship. But you'll never win the lottery if you don't buy a ticket, right?
So join VenusConnections.com. That's VenusConnections.com. And find the relationship of your dreams. Here's what's coming up on this episode of the Venus Cuckoldress podcast. Why is it so hard to find a bull, a really good bull? Why is it so fucking hard? This episode is going to be for all the couples out there who are struggling or for the couples who are thinking about doing this for the first time. There's a lot that goes into it, a lot more than you would expect.
So I'm going to break it down for you. What do you need to think about before you even start looking? And where do you find a really great ball? You are now listening to the Venus Cuckolders Podcast, a place to learn all things cuckolding for the curious, the passionate, and the sexually empowered woman who wants it all. Go to venuscuckoldress.com to subscribe to the podcast, ask a question for the show, and find the elusive Venus Vault, a sneak peek behind the bedroom door.
Now sit back, make yourself comfortable, and let's dive right into this episode of the Venus Cuckoldress podcast. I'm your host Venus. Thank you so much for joining me for this one. All right. Yes, I'm going to be talking about how to find a bull. One of the most common questions I get asked. I think the most common question is how do I get my wife into this? But the second most common question is, where do we find a bull? How can we find one?
So that's what I'm going to tackle for this episode today. But before we get into it, I have a couple of announcements to make. The first one being I'm launching a new series called Confessions. I often have people wanting to share their stories and fantasies with me. And so this is your opportunity to do that. And what it is, it's going to be some bonus episodes where you get to share your story with me. And I've just launched the very first one called The Letters.
It's part one because this story is amazing and it just keeps going. But it's pretty fucking awesome. It's all about this couple. This is their real life story where he got up the courage to tell her his deepest, darkest, cuckolding desires.
And they were vanilla as fuck for a very long time and so this was a big big thing and so he revealed these desires this fantasy of his by writing a letter and well you'll just have to listen to the story to figure out what happened next because like it was pretty amazing anyway i would love to hear your story. If you would like to share it, that would be amazing. You can go to venuscuckoldress.com and just click on the tab that says confessions.
Then you'll be able to get the instructions of how you can share your story with the Venus Cuckoldress podcast. Next, I just want to go over a few of these fucking amazing Apple podcast reviews that I've had for this podcast. Thank you so much for everyone who has taken the time to not only rate the podcast, but give a review. So thank you. The first one I'm going to read off is by Ben, and it is titled Inspirational, Enlightening, and Enticing.
He said, Venus is the reason my partner and I have the loving cuckolding relationship that we do, and every episode of our podcast is impossible to put down. The latest one has been out six hours, and I've already listened twice. As a 26-year-old man who has always been really into cuckolding, this has been an inspiring and educational take on the kind of loving and just extremely hot dynamic that a true cuckolding relationship can bring.
I really appreciate how Venus sorts through the clutter of fake cuckolding and the negative impact of male-dominated cuckold porn. All hail Venus. Keep up the great work. So thank you, Ben. That is awesome. One more is from someone, but it goes by the name of Jem. And they said, your podcast has helped my wife and I take our relationship to a whole new level. We're still in the early stages of our cuckolding adventure.
She is considering her options for her first bull, but it's already been an experience unlike any other. The thrill of watching my wife flirt with a handsome black man at a bar as he slides his hand up and down her thigh. Wow. She had never really thought about it much, but after listening to several of your podcasts on interracial cuckolding, she called me at work one day to say, well, she really does make a good argument about BBC. He said it was the hottest call ever.
The closeness and intimacy I feel with my wife being able to tell me stories of her past sexual relationships without jealousy or anger brought on by my own self-imposed inadequacies and with 100% honesty in her sexual desires has brought us so much closer than I dreamed was ever possible.
Even if she never takes the next step with a bull, I will forever be grateful for your podcast for helping me figure out desires I've had since I was a teenager and helping my wife to start to see that she is a strong, sexually empowered goddess that I have always seen her as. Holy shit, is that not amazing or what? I just love hearing stories like that. I really do. There are some assholes though who leave reviews on there.
I think they're just like really insecure butt hurt losers or something like that. I don't know. I don't really pay much attention, but there are a few that have made some really fucking vile reviews. So I want to ask everybody who's listening, I want to ask you a favor. Could you please go to Apple Podcasts? Let's drown out the assholes and make a nice fucking review for this podcast.
If you love it, if it has in some way if you just appreciate listening to it whatever i would just love it if you could just go and make a review a rating and review that would be amazing so thank you in advance for that all right last thing before we get started into this how to find a bull episode i have a moan chat coming up with Crystal Welch. That is May 20th at 8 p.m. Pacific time. We are going to talk about the beautiful benefits of a loving cuckolding relationship for women.
This will be the second moan chat where we've talked about this and the first one, let me tell you, if you missed it, it was fucking amazing. It was really great. Some excellent conversation around why women really do and should love a cuckolding relationship. So make sure you catch that. That's May 20th at 8pm Pacific time. And if you're not on the Moan app, you should be go to the Apple store, download it, the Moan app, M-O-N, and catch these live drop-in audio chats.
And it's everything about sex. So why wouldn't you want to? They're a lot of fun. They're really great. Okay, time to get this started. How to find a bull. Here we go. This is my best advice, my tips, my strategies that I'm going to share with you today for how to find a bull. But let me just say, this isn't just going to be like a, what websites should I go to kind of advice.
This is actually the whole thing, what you need to consider, the conversations that you need to have, and based on that, where you need to go. All right, so before you think about where to go to find this person that you're looking for, you need to ask yourself, why is it that you are looking for a bull? What do you want? What is the whole purpose of this? This may seem like a stupid thing to ask yourself, but it is so important.
What I mean by that is, do you already have a bull or two or three and you're just looking to add another one? Or are you trying this for the very first time and maybe you're just looking for one guy for one experience and you and your husband are just doing this, trying this out just to see if this works, just dipping your toes in there and seeing if you like the temperature or not.
Or are you looking for someone for a friends with benefits kind of situation or a one night stand kind of situation? Is this person someone who you are looking for simply for a sexual experience? Or do you want to have some sort of connection with them? Do you want to have a polyamorous kind of connection? So you have romantic feelings with this bull, as well as your husband. But when it comes down to it, you need to decide, is this going to be a romantic partner? Is this going to be a friend?
Or is this going to be just sex? And it's important for you to have a really good understanding of what it is that you want. This should be the conversation that you have with your partner, your wife or your husband or boyfriend, girlfriend, fiance, whatever your partner that you are in a relationship with. This should be the conversation that you have first. What exactly are you looking for?
And maybe it is a matter of you just don't know what it is that you're looking for yet, but you'll figure it out as you go. That is a very tricky starting point because there can be a lot of mistakes that can be made along the way and maybe not very comfortable situations that you might be in along the way as well. But if you do have experience with bulls already, then you probably have a pretty good idea of what it is that you're looking for, your preferences, everything like that.
It doesn't necessarily make it easier for you to find a bull because there's just not a lot of them out there. But I think probably for most women listening right now, or couples listening right now, So it's a matter of them out there. But I think probably for most women listening right now, or couples listening right now, it's a matter of finding a new bull where you don't already know what your preferences are.
And in that case, I would say, figure out if you want to have a quote unquote bull, or if you just want a guy to provide this experience for you. And it doesn't always have to be a bull. It could be just some guy. And so I think the default for couples is to, for your first experience, have this like mind blowing, amazing, cuckolding, fantasy experience come true. And yeah, that sounds fun. Sounds great and everything like that.
But if that's what you set out to do, be prepared to wait a long time to find the right person because finding that real bull, it can be a challenge. And I'll talk about that a little bit later on in this episode. But if you want it to be just a guy, I mean, that's okay. It can be just a guy. It can be a one night stand. It could be just a, you know, a friend. It can be a friend's friend. It could be just some guy you met. It doesn't have to be a quote unquote bull.
For your first experience, your partner doesn't have to be there to sit and watch you. Believe it or not, they don't actually have to be a quote unquote bull. For your first experience, your partner doesn't have to be there to sit and watch you. Believe it or not, they don't actually have to be there to watch. They can just hear about it when you get home or listen on the phone or get some pictures or videos or whatever. They don't have to be there.
Because let's face it, if it is just some guy who's going to provide this experience for you and you tell him, look, my husband wants to be there to watch, that might freak him out. He might be like, well, I don't want a fucking audience. I don't want some dude staring at me while I'm fucking you. For some guys, that is just, they're like, nah, nah, I'm not doing that. Like, that's just that sounds sketchy. It sounds uncomfortable. I'm not going there.
So he does your partner does not have to be there. And of course, it comes down to whatever it is that she is most comfortable with. So if she wants to find a bull for a full on fucking fantasy come true with a cuckolding experience for your partner, go for it. If she wants to have just a one night stand with somebody, go for it. If she doesn't want to have sex with somebody else, but just wants to flirt, go for it. I mean, it is entirely up to her.
And I don't care how whiny and complaining husbands are. Do not fucking pressure her. It is up to her. And this is often a problem because the husband's been, you know, watching this kind of porn for so long. He's been fantasizing about this for so long. He knows exactly how he wants it to play out. He knows exactly what he wants the bull to look like, say, do, all of this stuff. He wants it so badly that he's going to try to orchestrate this.
And what he needs to realize is that this is not about that. This is actually about, you know, encouraging your wife to explore her sexuality in the way that she wants, however she wants, with whoever she wants, and allowing that to happen on its own and encouraging that to grow and flourish on its own is going to result in all sorts of amazing experiences for you both.
You just can't sit there and be a fucking, as my friend Pagan calls them, mini Spielberg and want to direct the scenes and make the movie happen exactly the way that you want. You just need to back off and make it about her. I can't say that enough. All right, so once you figure out if you want a bull or if you want just some guy, then that really impacts where you go next. However, there is some work you still need to do before you hit the hookup sites, dating sites, whatever.
Okay, there's work that you need to do. And this is very, very important. And this is a step that often does not get the attention it deserves by couples. I think, you know, not on purpose, but it is something that gets skipped a lot. So listen up. This is very, very important for all the couples listening, singles, couples, whatever. This is important. This is the preliminary work that you need to do before you get out there looking for a bull or a guy.
You're going to sit down together and you are going to hash out all the details together.
The first thing that you want to do is decide amongst yourselves how much time do you want to put into this search for a guy because uh it's not going to happen right away this is going to be an actual fucking chore it's going to feel like a chore um it's not going to something be something that just magically appears um contrary to what you'd see online and consume online when it comes to the cuckold fantasy uh there are not a plethora of bulls just standing by waiting for you to just put it out there into the universe that you're ready for this is absolutely not like this.
This is going to be a real search to find something that works for the both of you and for your relationship and for the bull. So how much time do you want to put into that? I'm talking about like, do you want to spend maybe one day a week, you know, going through Thank you. So how much time do you want to put into that?
I'm talking about like, do you want to spend maybe one day a week, you know, going through profiles and chatting with some people and figuring out, you know, asking them questions and, you know, figuring out their personality, talking, texting, maybe how much time do you want to put into this? because this can actually overtake you quite easily. I'm speaking from experience here.
This can be really overwhelming in your life this can take up a lot of time and energy looking for this person and you have to figure out like do you have that time because maybe you're going to go through something a new job a move or whatever some sort of life event that's going to be coming up or you're going through right now, which would make it really not a good time to be focusing on finding a bull. So keep that in mind.
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How secret do you want this to be? I mean, there are couples out there who refuse to go out and look for a bull in their own city or town because they're afraid of bumping into someone that they may know. And when she's sitting there talking with another guy, that could be problematic. So that you need to decide how secretive or open do you want this to be? What are you comfortable with? Also, you need to think about privacy and discretion for your bull as well.
What if you guys happen to bump into each other at the grocery store? Do you say hello? Or do you pretend like no, that person does not exist? And this is important to think about that because, and talk about it with a bull, when you meet a bull, you talk about that exact situation because that can result in some really hurt feelings if you don't sort that out beforehand.
If you ignore someone pretending like they don't exist and they take that badly, that can be a really bad situation and detrimental for your relationship. But with that comes along what kind of information you want to share with this person. Are you going to make up fake names? You don't want to give them your real name. Are you going to use an anonymous messaging app like Google phone or Google text or whatever, whatever? Are you going to be sharing any pictures?
Are you going to be sharing any videos? Do you want to make sure that all of those things are done on your own phone and not on someone else's so that you have full control over them? And ask yourself how much of your own information do you want to be sharing on a profile? And you want to talk about, obviously, boundaries. You want to establish some clear boundaries for you as a couple and between you and your bull.
So talk about what the expectations are and what is going too far and what you're comfortable with and how you expect to involve your boyfriend or husband or how you want your wife to involve you in these kinds of situations. Do you want to be there? Do you have to be there? How do you want to be involved? Do you want her to talk about you? Do you want her to make it look like you don't exist?
Maybe not tell the guy that she's married or what kind of kinky stuff you would like to do and what you are not comfortable with. So establishing what your limits are and like humiliation or teasing. Maybe he's comfortable with it. Maybe he's not. Maybe he's likes the whole power exchange thing. Maybe he's just like, nah, I'm not into that at all. Maybe he really wants to receive some pictures. Maybe she would love to send some videos to him.
And you're going to want to discuss things like sleepovers. Like, is that going to be a thing that you're comfortable with or not? Or just friendship dates? Like, are you going to be okay with her hanging out with this guy outside of like a sexual encounter? Or is this going to be an ongoing friend who you're going to want to involve in your own family and friends circle? Or is this going to be someone who is going to be completely separate from your life?
And with the boundaries conversation, you have to talk about consent. This seems something like something that would be obvious, but it rarely ever happens. And so really define what consent means for the both of you and for your bowl and figure out how do you express that? How do you check in with that and make sure that it's an ongoing consent? And lastly, really important. You're going to have to talk about the what ifs and safety.
This is like, oh my God, have this conversation now so that you don't end up having the oh fuck moments later on. And what I mean by that is you need to talk about STIs. You need to talk about protection when it comes to sex, condoms, all of that sort of thing. You need to talk about the potential for an unwanted or unplanned pregnancy. You need to talk about the potential of meeting someone who has ulterior motives and you don't catch on to that until it's too late. I'm talking about blackmail.
I'm talking about sextortion. You need to think about that now because there's all sorts of shady as fuck people out there. And this one is really scary. This is the potential for violence. And when you're meeting up with a stranger, it doesn't matter how much you have time you have taken to get to know them. And you're going to have to just, you know, trust that they're going to be safe. This is this person not going to harm you, but you never fucking know. You never know.
So you have to talk about this potential for violence and come up with some actual safety plans as far as letting him know where you're going to be at, you know, the contact information. What are you what are you going to do, what's your exit strategy kind of thing if something goes sideways. You need to talk about all of those situations now to prevent, hopefully, that happening in the future. All right, that is the work that you need to do beforehand.
So it sounds a little unsexy and not fun, but you absolutely have to have those conversations. Do not fucking skip that step.
Now, next, of course, we're going to have all sorts of eager husbands who just can't wait to jump right in and get their fantasy realized that they've been thinking about for so long, and hesitant wives who are a little bit unsure about jumping in to do this kind of thing, or maybe they're a little excited, hopefully, but more often than not, it's the husbands who are just fucking chomping at the bit to be able to get out there and do this. I get it. I understand.
This is something that you really want. It's hot. It's sexy, it's fun, it is thrilling, it's everything you've always wanted. However, let's slow the fuck down and ask your wife if she wants to ease into this shit. Ask her straight up, how do you want to do this? Because expecting to jump right in and find a bull off the shelf to fulfill this fantasy, like I said earlier, is probably not going to happen the way that you think it is.
So easing into this kind of thing might be a really great option for you. And what I mean by that is taking the sex part off the table, at least initially, right? Take it off the table. Let her have fun learning how to flirt with other guys. I mean, maybe this is something that she hasn't done since before you got married, and that might have been decades ago. This might be a foreign thing to her now.
And so letting her have that experience of having fun, flirting with other men can be a fun little way of easing your way into this kind of fantasy. If that is how she wants to do it, there's a lot of places where you can go do that. You can actually go on vacation to like one of those hedonism resorts and she can flirt all she wants with people who are obviously open to non-monogamy, open-minded anyway.
Or you can just find, like go on the vanilla sites and just be very upfront about what it is that you are looking for and letting people know, look, I'm in a relationship, but I'm just looking for a friendship right now or a flirty friendship. That's all you got to say. I just looking for a flirty friendship and that's it. You don't have to say that you are actually looking for a bull. Just be really, really clear about what it is that you're looking for on your profile for that.
So that's kind of like easing into it. You know, go to a club or go to a bar, talk to some guy, just, you know, get his phone number, whatever. Like all of those fun little things that are actually, husbands, let me tell you, those little things are a lot of fun. Maybe even just as much fun as your wife going out and fucking another guy. Let me tell you, those fun little flirty things are a great way to play with the mindfuck of cuckolding together.
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You are ready. Green light go. You want to do this now kind of thing. Where you actually go depends on what you're looking for. If it's a guy that just some guy that you're looking for that you just want to have a one night stand with, there are a gazillion hookup apps out there that you can use that you will have lots of success with it. And it's up to her. It's up to you as a couple. If you want to let this person know, hey, I'm in a relationship already. My husband's okay with this.
I'm just looking for a one night fun experience, blah. Or if you want to just keep that part secret and private and just have this one night experience with this one person, and it's only ever going to be just that. That's okay. It's up to you. You decide what it is that you want to do. If you are looking for more of a friends with benefits kind of attachment, meaning it's not just a one night stand, it's not just a, you know, wham bam, thank you ma'am kind of thing.
This is somebody who you want to have some sort of connection with. Now I'm not saying romantic connection, but a connection, a personal connection with this person, like a friendship with the benefits of great sex. So if that's what you're looking for, and honestly, that this is what I look for when I'm looking for somebody, is I use a vanilla dating app like Tinder.
I put on my profile, my profile, I put pictures of me without showing my full face and on my profile, I'll put something like, I am looking for a really great experience with somebody, but I'm also looking for a solid friendship with them as well. And then I go into saying, I'm not looking for polyamory. I'm not looking for a relationship. I'm simply looking for an amazing, solid friendship with someone who I really appreciate in my life. And we have amazing, incredible sex.
And hello, who doesn't want that? Sign me up. Or you can word it something like I'm in a one-sided relationship and we both love it that way. I get to have my fun with other people and I'm looking for a friends with benefits situation and heavy emphasis on the friendship part.
And I guess for either of those approaches, whether it be that you're just looking for a one night stand kind of thing or a friends with benefits kind of thing, you can actually go out and meet people like this in real life events. now that you know fucking covid is on its way out hopefully um people will be you know out and mingling more in real life kind of events or sex clubs or hedonism resorts or just going out for pool parties or whatever, that kind of thing.
Okay, and lastly, let's talk about what are you going to do if you are dead set on wanting an actual quote unquote bull experience? If you're looking for this guy who is a bull, then this is going to be a little bit more tricky for you.
A bull is someone who really understands the cuckolding dynamic, understands that role of a bull and loves that role of a bull like they wouldn't want it any way else and what I mean by that is like for me that that role that position of a cuckoldress man I fucking love that like it suits who I am and for a cuck it it that position suits who he is and for a actual bull that position that he has in that triad kind of situation is suits exactly who he is.
And so these guys who really feel so strongly about that role of the bull, of course, there's not that many of them because this is not for everybody. There's a gazillion guys out there who will fuck your wife. There's a gazillion guys who I can go out there right now and fuck. And that be a sexual experience with somebody else other than my boyfriend or husband. That part is simple, obviously, because, you know, you can find people who want to fuck. That is not difficult.
But finding someone who really loves and appreciates that role of being a bull is uncommon. And then of course, there's all of the intricacies of, you know, the dynamics of your own relationship, the dynamics of what he is used to and what he wants can be totally different to what it is that you guys want.
So finding somebody who really lines up with the expectations that you have, and is really like on board with all of that, man, it's like, it's like winning the lottery when you find a really good bull. It is. Calling all sex and intimacy illustrators. Have we got an interesting case for you key barrett who wrote the book locked in love is working on a new book and he needs your help he's looking for 15 to 20 illustrations of sex positions where the submissive partner is locked in chastity.
These can be very simple illustrations like an airline safety card or your own unique style. There will be credit, royalties, and a small compensation for each image. Find Key Barrett on Twitter for more details. You know you have found a really good bull when he understands your dynamic with you and your partner. If he understands, he gets it. And he is also mindful of your cuckolding boundaries and curious to learn what those boundaries are.
Curious to learn more about your dynamic if that curiosity is there that is an excellent component of a really good bull but he knows how to play with that dynamic and that's where this this whole appeal of an actual bull comes from is because he knows how to play with the mind fuckery of cuckolding, which is the fun part for a lot of us. For the women, for me, I can tell you right now, it's not just about being able to have sex with other guys.
Like, I know that guys think that that is like the ultimate prize, but for myself, no. the appeal of this kind of relationship comes from having that kind of mental connection with your partner who you really love because you know the shit's turning him on and you know that if you say this one thing and do that little thing that it is going to drive him wild you know that there is a game to be played here and it is fun.
So when you find someone who is dialed into that, when you find a bull who fucking understands that, that is where you go from, okay, you're having sex outside of your marriage with some guy to mind fucking blowing experiences between all three of you so you can understand why actual real bulls are in such high demand because they can be such a huge benefit to your relationship to each other so how do you find a real bull so I my own personal experiences I don't find them out they're just not out there looking they're not really you'll find a lot of guys out there who say they're bulls who are like advertising themselves but these are likely guys who are just kind of dipping their toes into it and they have a lot to learn which is okay I mean that's entirely fine but to get the really experienced bulls who understand and already know this kind of stuff I don't find them really kind of out there especially on vanilla sites like tinder and stuff like that I'm just you're not gonna find them on there So where do you find real bulls?
Like I have found some in unusual places. Like I have one on, like one that I met through Instagram, which was pretty unusual. But on FetLife, you, it's hit and miss on FetLife. There's a lot of fake profiles. There's a lot of fake bulls on there. Like that shit pisses me the fuck off. And oh, pro tip here. Okay, ladies, let me tell you this.
If a bull sends you a picture of his dick or whatever, his body, whatever, that looks fucking crazy amazing, what you need to do is you need to do a reverse image search on Google or whatever. Just search it up online, reverse image search. And you need to actually search that online and see if it comes up anywhere else. Because this is how lots of couples have figured out who is real and who is fake. Because the fake guys will use some image that they've found online that is super fucking hot.
They start sending it to women saying, this is my picture of my dick. And it's bullshit. It's total fucking bullshit. So use that reverse image search feature and make sure that you can somewhat verify if this person is legit or not. But yeah, FetLife is horrible for that, unfortunately. There's a message forum called Black to White. There's a lot of people. There's a lot of men on there. A lot of men. Very few women.
women surprise surprise um but there's a lot of guys on there claiming to be bulls whether or not they're genuine or not i don't know i don't know but that's somewhere where you could look i don't know um hookup hookup apps maybe you'll find something maybe not there are some pretty fucking good ways of finding a bull though. So listen up. I've only come up with two, just two, two really good ways of finding a bull. Number one, referrals from other women. Yes.
If you can connect with people in this lifestyle, couples in this lifestyle, women in this lifestyle, if you can connect with them and say, hey, like, I'm going to be in this city or do you know of any really great bulls, blah, like, and we'll be able to tell you straight up, yes, I've got this guy, you should really try them. I like this guy because of this and that guy because of that. And these are legit referrals. That is the best way that you can find someone.
However, of course, I know it's not always easy to reach out and connect with people in the lifestyle, or maybe they just don't know anybody in your area. I get that. There are lifestyle events that you can go to or just go to sex clubs. You can go. Sometimes they've got like lifestyle hot wifing events at these sex clubs or resorts like hedonism resorts and stuff like that where you can go and you might be able to find these guys.
But if you can find these lifestyle events for cuckolding specifically, like for if you like interracial cuckolding like I do, then you might want to look into the Splash Mocha Parties. These are hotel takeover events where you can go and actually meet up with many of the experienced bulls in this lifestyle.
And that might be a really great way where you can actually just go meet these guys, figure out who you like, who you don't like, get their contact information and keep in touch after the event. So those two options are the only ones that I could come up with that are your best bet for finding a really good bull. Having said that, having said all of that, when it comes to searching for a bull, couples get really frustrated. Couples get really annoyed. And I think that I can understand that.
I can completely understand that. It can feel like a chore. It could feel like it's never going to happen. You're never going to find the right person, that you're just got to go through so many guys to be able to find a good one. And that's just the way it is. Unfortunately, be prepared to go through a lot of potentials before you find one that works for you. It can take months. It might even take years. So patience is important. Also, there is the issue of flakes. So be prepared.
If this is your very first time looking for a bulb, be prepared to be flaked out on. And what I mean by that is you will find somebody, everything's going great, you're texting, you're chatting, you're making plans, all of this seems wonderful, great, and then 30 minutes before you're supposed to meet up, he bails or doesn't even show up at all.
This is but it happens often this has nothing to do with you this is just bad behavior and it's not just bad behavior on the bulls parts couples do this as well so everybody is acting badly often in this lifestyle and so it results in a lot of frustration because you put so much effort and time into this person and then they're gone. So it's annoying as fuck. Try not to be a flake and just treat people respectfully. If you're not feeling it, just say you're not feeling it. It's okay.
You're going to have to get used to those awkward conversations where you say, look, I was feeling it. I'm not quite so sure anymore. I think I'm just going to, you know, move on kind of thing. You have to get used to that. You have to. And if you're just, you just got a bad feeling about somebody, listen to that gut feeling. Trust me, I did not listen to that feeling. And it meant I ended up in one of the most dangerous, terrifying experiences of my life.
So if you have this weird kind of feeling about somebody, don't do it. Just don't go. Lastly, I just want to say that sometimes you might have to sacrifice some mind-blowing sex if this guy that you brought into your relationship is not working for your relationship. If it's causing some issues, some drama between you and your husband, then you may have to let him go. And I'm so sorry that your pussy has to give up the best sex it's ever had.
But you're going to have to be willing to do that sometimes. It might happen. It happened to me. It was shitty. But I had to. I had to. Lastly, last piece of advice. This one's important as well. Take a break if you need to, if you're getting frustrated, if you're getting pissed off, if it's just not working, you can take a break and that is totally okay. That's going to be it for this episode of the Venus Cuckolders podcast. I hope you enjoyed it.
If you have a tip that I missed about how to find a really great bull, please go to venuscuckoldriss.com. That's where you can send me a voice note by clicking on the tab that says Ask Venus.
Also on that same website, you can subscribe to the podcast, visit the Venus Vault, and register for the next pillow talk events make sure you listen to venus cuckoldress podcast on full swap radio every tuesday at 5 and 11 central time they have a new app as well and asn lifestyle magazine i write for that magazine once a month make sure you check that out if you want to follow me on twitter my handle is at CuckoldressV. We'll see you next time.
have you heard of afterglow you guys this is so amazing you've you've probably heard me talk about cuck porn before and how much i'm not really a big fan and why because it's not really made for women right but afterglow is different afterglow is ethical porn made by women for women well it's Thank you. a big fan. And why? Because it's not really made for women, right? But Afterglow is different. Afterglow is ethical porn made by women for women.
Well, it's for everyone, but it is especially for women. And I'll give you an example. They have hot wifing videos that one of them is that I watched. It was narrated by a woman. Okay. So hot. It's from her perspective, from her point of view, oh my god, so sexy. Lots of interaction between her and her husband, lots of eye contact, all that sort of stuff. Like, it's hot. Guys, if you want to get your wife or girlfriend into this kind of thing, watch this together, I'm telling you.
But it's not just videos. They actually have guided masturbations. They have partner exercises to improve communication and intimacy. And they have candid interviews with sex educators, influencers and therapists. Like there's so much more than just porn videos. It's amazing. Definitely check it out. With the code Venus, you can try it out for a week. The website is xoafterglow.com. And the code you need for your free week is Venus. That's xoafterglow.com.
Check out the show notes if you can't remember if you just want the link. Enjoy.
