We need some help!

Thanks for the advice! I guess that’s been our biggest problem is we’ve been going to “vanilla” locations. We’ll research some local clubs in our area.

Hi. I'm a little confused. Are you looking in vanilla bars and clubs in the hopes of finding a couple inclined to swing? Because the chance of that happening randomly is really, really small. Actually, I've been swinging off and on for a really long time and in a vanilla setting I would not pick up on interest from a couple, even though I would know exactly what was up in a swing club. I'd just assume they were being friendly, which is something I encounter pretty frequently. Because it's just so unlikely for a couple to try to pick up a couple out in the world, you know?

Allen is right. Search out meet and greets in your area and attend them.

Since you are new to this, find a meet and greet near you and sign up to get out and meet people so you are not second guessing couples nor a hotwife scenario in public settings.

~Allen

Hello all, long time member but first post here. We need a little help & guidance on where to go (and how) in order to take things to the next level. We have been together for over twenty years (high school sweethearts) and still have a great relationship. We have one child and are a fun loving couple and family. We also happen to be each other’s first. It wasn’t until a while ago that we both shared a fantasy with one another and found that we both have the same interest. We’d like to find another couple to share our fantasies with! She’d like to experience another man, bi-curious, and would also be the center of attention in a threesome. He’d like to watch, experience another woman, and partake in a threesome as well.

After years of fantasizing with one another, we decided to put out a personal ad to see what we could find. For her, she likes the attention it brings with our personal ad, but she seems to be reluctant to want to progress with anyone that replies to it. So this led to us both deciding to go out and try out our luck in person. We never seem to find anyone anywhere that we can approach to talk to. She’s feeling more and more determined now, more so than when we first talked about doing this.

Every other Saturday night is date night. Our child typically sleeps over at a friend/relatives house giving us the night to do whatever we want. Her thing now is getting done up as best as she can and go out to seek attention and "browse" if you will. We’ll go out to bars and restaurants, typically looking to see what we can find together. I usually let her pick where we go so she feels the most comfortable in the right environment/atmosphere. But we always seem to strike out. Either nobody gives her attention or our timing is off (place is not as busy, exc.). We’ve even tried sitting separately giving some anonymity, but no attention. It’s not as if she’s not attractive (check our profile), just nothing seems to go our way.

So we need some help. Any ideas on what we can do differently? How about a site or app that we can use to see where some local public meets are popular for couples to meet? We both do browse the events tab here but they seem to be more for couples and clubs (nothing newbie friendly). We want to know if there’s a way to find local & popular hangouts where people of similarities can meet/hook up.

Thanks!

PS

I should add that we live in the Sacramento area. Typically we venture midtown to Roseville.