As a single man, I have no problem paying for drinks/dinner and the room if that’s what we are doing. Several different reasons. If I’m contactig you, I’m paying, simple. If a unicorn contacts me, I’m paying (and that only happened once with the two times I’ve been on now). And if a couple contacts me, I’ll grab the check, because I just kind of feel flattered. Now if they start throwing back $20 shots of tequila one after the other, I’m saying something.
We almost always assume that whoever does the inviting, does the paying. We wouldn’t have a problem with a couple asking us to split the cost, it that hasn’t happened yet.
Playing as a single, I've never paid for the hotel. As a couple, splitting the bill worked if neither couple could host, but It made more sense to pay the whole thing if we were planning to spend the night in the room.
The subject came up in another thread a couple of days ago, and one big thing I didn't think of is that if you're paying for the room, it would be smart to be the one actually using the room overnight (Yay! Let's get room service! It's not on my credit card!). :)
One thing I've often done with who pays for dinner in dating is to assume that whoever asked for the date pays for dinner. Although, usually I end up deciding to pay for dinner anyway, and am happy to do so. Perhaps a variation of that kind of solution might work for you when it comes to hotel rooms.
I guess what it comes down to is to just talk it out, get that communication going, and find out what everyone's comfortable with. I'm not sure that there's a hard and fast rule on rooms except the general rule of "don't be a jerk". But that rule applies to everything.
I could use some advice/insight on how to proceed with hosting. I prefer to meet at a hotel for safety and comfort, is it fair to ask the other person/couple to pay half or should I foot the bill? Any suggestions are appreciated.
