Pineapples

"Ouch. I had a friend with a wandering partner."

Back in my Army days, a couple of Captains decided to entertain some of us enlisted men with the story of how another anonymous officer got a black eye. His smokeshow wife didn't want to try anal, so he talked her into using Anbesol to numb things down south. Apparently that shit really STINGS and she coldcocked him when he slapped it on.

For us, the funny part is that the battalion commander's radio operator responded "Hmmph. That sounds like something Captain Smith would do..." The look on the other Captain's faces gave it away, and after about 5 straight minutes of laughter, they practically begged us to keep our mouths shut.

Put a sock in it Sorillo.

Well, that's what I heard that the cool kids do with it.

In the really way back days, hollowed, upside down pineapples filled with bees were a common toy at orgies. Which is why the upside down pineapple is a sign of a swinger in today's world.

Bore a hole in a cantaloupe, microwave at about 1/2 power, test the temperature with your fingers (put numbers on the side with a Sharpie).

At least, that's what I HEARD that the cool kids do with it.

I think the message has spread far and wide. We were at a Sam's club, and some guys we're shopping, I recall for a boy's weekend. They picked up a pineapple and started joking , about picking up chick's, I said make sure it's upside down to advertise, they were well informed on the process, and we all had a good laugh.

Here's 1 quick cleaning and lubing tip for dildos: Frank's RedHot- don't put that $#!t on EVERYTHING.

Ouch. I had a friend with a wandering partner. When she would discover his trespass she would but the strongest mentholated cough drop in her mouth and suddenly become very oral.

Big Kahu same here in South Carolina, Charleston

But how much of the pineapple jewelry are upside down pineapples?

I know someone, definitely not in the lifestyle, who bought a Hawaiian style shirt in Hawaii that was an all pineapples design. Some of them were upside down. Now THAT could be confusing to people watching for the upside down pineapple clue.

It’s very confusing in Hawaii as so much pineapple jewelry is worn. Can imagine making the wrong assumption not going over very well lol.

"If the wife wears a pineapple item .. does the mean she is bi or a hot wife?"

We wouldn't think so. Not all women in the lifestyle consider themselves either of those.

"...10 quick tips for cleaning and lubing the dildo would be offered."

Here's 1 quick cleaning and lubing tip for dildos: Frank's RedHot- don't put that $#!t on EVERYTHING.

“ Ida know, maybe that was better suited for the Fun Facts thread.”

Bravo! Encore! Encore! I love this sort of trivia

New be question...

If the wife wears a pineapple item .. does the mean she is bi or a hot wife?

Sounds like something for the Home Economics blog.

I’m sure 10 quick tips for cleaning and lubing the dildo would be offered.

BT

Lol @ good. Steam powered...

Yeah, John Henry died. :-(

Quackery? Let me tell you how it REALLY is....

In the really way back days, hollowed, upside down pineapples filled with bees were a common toy at orgies. Which is why the upside down pineapple is a sign of a swinger in today's world. But wait, there's more...

...when the bees escaped, the women's reactions were hysterical screams and the pineapple was no longer useful as a vibrating toy.

In the 1800's, when a locomotive steam engine was attached to a dildo (don't ask), a method of dealing with that hysterical reaction emerged. But the locomotive steam engine was so large that it occupied an entire room. So, during orgies, it was placed in one room and the dildo protruded through a hole in the wall into another room This was a glorious idea and the hole in the wall was thereafter referred to as a Glory Hole.

Ida know, maybe that was better suited for the Fun Facts thread.

Yes, medical quackery. There’s a big market for those hysteria machines…for historical purposes only I’d imagine.

@Good - Didn’t John Henry drop dead right after winning?

BT

thehistoryblog
com/archives/4755

Guys, they were called hysteria machines. Jeesh, a little reading on US sexual history would be helpful.

Btw the early ones were, in fact, steam powered.

I knew we kept you around for something....

I think you're right. Word is John Henry drilled it 15 deep while the steam drill could only made it 9.

Or belt-driven, John Henry

They say you can’t, but maybe she figured out a way to take it with her?

BT

Grandma didn't have plastic on her furniture but I, my brother and 4 cousins were pallbearers. One cousin remarked at how heavy the casket was considering Grandma wasn't a very big person, which had us speculating at what might have been in the casket with her.

I think vibrators were steam powered in her day.

Thanks Saland.

I was thinking that my last post might have gone a bit too far, but it’s good to know that there was more runway.

BT

Goodnuf if she had plastic on her furniture she was a squirter

@Good- .” Now youse guys gots me thinking that Grandma might have taken some other secrets to her grave.”

…you’re not thinking that they buried her with her vibrator are you?

BT