In this episode of That Other Lifestyle, host Jason delves into the often overlooked topic of preferences within the lifestyle and ethical non-monogamy. While some might find the subject awkward, Jason brings a blend of humor and realness to exploring why preferences are a natural part of human connection. From discussing the allure of physical attraction to the importance of personality in sexual encounters, this episode provides listeners with an enlightening and honest look at how preferences shape our choices in relationships.
Jason encourages listeners to understand and embrace their own preferences while respecting those of others. The conversation touches upon the differences between preferences and boundaries, clarifying that while preferences can be flexible, boundaries are non-negotiable. Listeners are also encouraged to communicate openly about their desires and to recognize when preferences align or misalign.
Whether you're a curious vanilla listener or a seasoned lifestyle participant, this episode is packed with insights on understanding attraction, setting personal criteria, and fostering respectful connections within the lifestyle community. Tune in for an educational discussion that's sure to enlighten and entertain.
My links:
www.thatotherlifestyle.com
https://benable.com/ThatOtherLifestyle
National Lifestyle Weekend Tickets
Naughty in New Orleans 2025 Tickets
Single Men's Guide to the Lifestyle Course
https://beacons.ai/thatotherlifestyle
Risque Lifestyle Parties
SDC.com
STDHero.com
Hellowisp.com
Transcript
good afternoon good evening wherever you are i hope you have blue skies welcome to that other lifestyle podcast i am your host jason leave vanilla behind as we talk about preferences this podcast is for adults only we'll be diving into adult and sexual topics with plenty of colorful language so it is not safe for work if you're under 18 this is the place for you. This show is all about exploring the lifestyle and ethical non-monogamy, and it's open to everyone, no matter your background, gender identity, expression, or your personal truth.
While I do my best to use inclusive language, you might hear terms like husband, wife, or partner for simplicity's sake. This show is for everyone, lifestyle vanilla or the curious. Want to connect with me? So you can send me an email at host at thatotherlifestyle.com. Visit my website, thatotherlifestyle.com, and check out my favorite lifestyle product recommendations at abinable.com slash thatotherlifestyle. Everyone is welcome here because the lifestyle is about so much more than you think. If you're in the lifestyle, welcome you beautiful scandalous heathens.
And if you're vanilla, just listening we're talking about an awkward topic today that deep cringe i promise this will be enlightening awkward educational and hopefully a little bit funny you might even learn something i know the topic today relates directly to questions we get from vanilla people about the lifestyle all right lifestyle folks when was the last time you found yourself deep in the endless scroll on an adult site? Swiping, clicking, and playing your own personal game of fuckability compatibility, guess who? Flipping through profiles, scanning, and searching.
Are you the kind that goes straight to the new couples? Are you the kind that looks for seasoned veterans? Do you zoom past the dick pics and obvious red flags like the heavenly filtered pics with cat ears? Now, let me ask you this. What the fuck are you looking for exactly? What is your criteria? Light? Hair color? The perfect ratio of nudes to personality shots on the profile? Close-ups of buttholes? Or is it more of a vibe thing? Do you even read the profile or are you simply going off the pictures?
What magic combination of qualities makes you stop mid-scroll lick your lips and think, huh, I need to know more about them. Congratulations, you, my friend, have preferences. Shocking, I know, right? But let's get real. Everyone in the lifestyle does. It might be age, height, weight, hair color, relationship type, or maybe a well-written profile. Please stop using looking for fun as the only text you provide on your profile. No shit, we're all looking for fun. And guess what? It's perfectly natural.
You as a person or a couple are out here scanning for the qualities that make you go, yeah, I'd like to get to know them and maybe get on them. In a passionate, naked kind of way, it's human fucking nature. We're wired to take one look at someone based on what we see, make a snap decision about whether we'd like to shake their hand or shake the headboard with them. Dare say it is an evolutionary trait, wired deep into our lizard brains to make snap judgments about attraction. It worked for our cave people ancestors and it fucking works for us. It is not bad to have preferences.
It is normal and natural. The difference between us lifestyle people and them over there in the vanilla world is we can act on it. And before anyone clutches their pearls, this isn't just a lifestyle thing. This happens in the vanilla world. Another difference is that in the lifestyle, we actually admit we're fucking doing it. So let's say you're at a store and you see this big jack dude, maybe a little scruffy beard. He's got a tank top on carrying a puppy and roses. You will turn and you will look in a lustful manner. Or maybe it's a cute blonde in a tank top, carrying a puppy and roses.
This is a super dumb trope from movies and televisions. The dumpy husband sees a cute lady in public and the wife gives him a playful slap to stop. Or she does that half smirk like she's judging his behavior but doesn't approve, but she's going to dismiss it this time. I fucking hate when people do that to me, by the way. Lifestyle couples. The wife will probably encourage her husband to go over there and say hi. Look, we all have preferences. We have preferences for movies. Some people love horror movies, for instance. I don't. I respect people who do.
It's not my jam, and if you want to indulge in some gory late-night movie, go for it. We have preferences for food. Some people love sushi. Others think raw fish is disgusting. We have preferences on how we spend our free time. Go to the gym. Other people play video games, or other people go shopping or doom scrolling. Perfectly normal. Preferences shape our choices. Now, inevitably, some enlightened soul is going to pop up and say, but if you only stick to your preferences, you'll never experience anything new. And to that I say, calm the fuck down. Sure, expanding your horizons is great.
Try a new dish, watch a movie outside the usual genre, maybe even step outside your comfort zone in the bedroom and try anal. But let's be real, we are all grown adults here. Our preferences, whether for food, films, or fuck buddies, they're shaped by our lifetime of experiences. And if someone's personal preference doesn't include you, that's not discrimination, man. That's just life. And here, we arrive at the double-edged sword of preferences. We all have them because, again, they're perfectly fucking normal. But the catch is, we don't want them used against us.
We don't want someone else's preferences to be the reason we get left out of the fun. We don't want preferences to be weaponized against us. And here's the truth, though. Having preferences in this discussion is not the problem. Knowing what you like and what you don't like, that is a good thing.
It means you can communicate it clearly instead of playing a guessing game like some kind of lifestyle escape room ever have you ever interacted with a couple who can't explain what they like or they answer that they like everything both of those fucking responses are infuriating it's not going to hurt my feelings i promise if i am not your cup of tea in the lifestyle we all have preferences for the couples that we interact with we flirt and maybe take a spin with in the bedroom. That's not a bad thing. That's the whole fucking point of this hobby.
At the end of the day, we are curating our own VIP list, our own personal algorithm for attraction. We get to decide who we share our time with, our energy, and our bodies with. And that's not discrimination. That's just how human connection works. We can choose who we have sex with based on our own criteria because we all have body autonomy. This is a taboo topic to a lot of people. We need to collectively normalize this conversation and understand other people have preferences too. They will apply those preferences to us.
And furthermore, we need to be understanding that people have preferences and not to shit on anyone else's preferences. Just because someone is not sexually attracted to you, it doesn't mean we can't get along and be friends. This is about deciding who we're willing to have sex with. This is about empowering our own, your own body autonomy, which no one should ever violate or attempt to force you to negotiate. The topic of having preferences gets personal because people are worried about hurting someone else's feelings.
We worry that if we share that another couple is just not what we're looking for, we're going to make them unhappy. They're going to be displeased with us. And I counter, right, that we are all adults and we should be able to accept a no gracefully. And here's where people get it twisted. We conflate preferences with prejudice. Oh, you have a type? That means you're prejudging people. Well, yeah, kind of. Like, we all make snap-down judgments based on what we can observe in other people. But let's not pretend preferences are set in stone, though, like some ancient swinger tablet of rules.
Preferences aren't always a hard and fast measure. You might not be instantly drawn to someone physically, but their personality, their charm, that vibe they have. You may meet a supremely attractive couple who has the personality of a shit-covered barn stall. It happens. Then you have to question whether the dick you got was worth dealing with someone's abrasive jackass attitude.
And if you spend your entire time in the lifestyles chasing some mythical perfect couple that checks every box, congratulations, you're going to have a long and lonely journey filled with disappointments and ghosting. Your preferences should not be a rigid checklist. They should instead be a mosaic of qualities, not just a single static image. Oh, and while we're at it, let's make one concept clear. Preferences and boundaries are not the same thing. Preferences are about what you seek, enjoy, and are attracted to.
Boundaries, those are the hard limits, the non-negotiables, the nope-not-today-satan rules that you set for yourself. Mixing those two up is like confusing a wine preference with your alcohol tolerance. One is flexible. The other one's going to end your night real quick with vomiting. A boundary is saying, I do not want to watch a horror movie, for instance. I do not enjoy them for my own reasons. A preference is saying, I like some horror movies and I could give this a shot and I might watch one. Or I don't want to watch it, but I'm not stopping anyone else in the room from watching it.
So I guess one of these works on the negative and one works on the positive. While a preference may wiggle, a boundary does not. That's the difference. Putting this another way, you may prefer men with tattoos. You are attracted to that. You may have a boundary, though, against being held down. That is a non-negotiable. You may find a really cool dude with tattoos who enjoys holding his sex partner down in a completely consensual manner. That guy's off the table, though.
While you may be physically attracted to him because he fits your preference, there is a boundary there that cannot be crossed. Talking about preferences specifically, how do we figure out what they are? When you first get into the lifestyle, it is like an unlimited buffet of genitals and fun. Everything is new, everything looks delicious, and you want all the sex. That's normal, man. In fact, that's half the fucking fun. But over time, you'll start to refine your taste. You'll learn what you actually like, what's just shiny and new, and what was fun to experiment with, but yeah, never again.
Figuring out our preferences takes experience, and the kicker is they evolve. What you were into at the start of all this, it might not be what does it for you later on, and that's okay. Growth is sexy. Evolution is sexy. Stagnation is not sexy. You do not have to accept every couple that shows interest in you, and it's okay to be picky. Now, the first thing everyone thinks about when I talk about preferences, pure, raw, physical attraction. That feeling of, do I want to climb them like a tree factor? But physical attraction is nuanced. There is no single formula here.
What kind of body type makes you weaken the knees? What about hair color, eye color, skin tone, dick size, boob size, asses that could start or end wars? Whatever it is, there is no right or wrong answer. Attraction is not a democracy. It's a you thing. Now, people may argue with me and say, actually, there is a wrong answer, but let's be real. Those people are usually the ones who don't fit your preferences. Funny how that works, right? Here's a fun fact that might blow some minds. You can be physically attracted to someone who looks nothing like your spouse.
Audible, gasp, I know, what a concept. What does that mean? It means you're not locked into some unspoken contract where you're only allowed to be attracted to clones of your partner. You might be buried to a big burly dude who can deadlift a car, but that doesn't mean you can't also appreciate the lanky guy who looks like he just rolled out of an indie band's tour van, or beards. Let's talk about beards. Fucking beards. Some women are married to men who can't grow one. It happens. Genetics is a cruel bitch.
But put her in front of a guy with a luscious, perfectly sculpted beard and suddenly she's intrigued. Not because she's unhappy in her marriage or unhappy with the way her husband looks, but because it's different. It's novel. Attractions are weird, fluid, and personal, and that's what makes it so much fun. It's okay to question what you like. It is okay to examine what you want in a sexual partner. It is not okay to decide that you will not associate with anyone that does not fit your personal fuckability preferences.
Yeah, you may not want to fuck them, but it does not mean that they're any less valid as a person. If you're out there just looking for people to fuck with total disregard of other people as humans, that's fucked up, man. I will call that out. It's fucked up. And here's where preferences get kind of icky. With your preferences, you're filtering out people based on purely personal fuckability criteria. You are making a judgment call. And for some people, that feels often wrong, like you're judging people, which you are. You have physical traits that you find attractive.
And no, not everyone is going to fit that mold that you have in your brain. That's fine. You are not obligated to fuck every single person that crosses your path or shows interest in you. That is not how attraction works or your personal sanity. There is a line here. It is okay to say no because you were not physically attracted to someone. It is not okay to act like they shouldn't exist in your orbit just because you don't want to fuck them. They are still valid people. The lifestyle isn't about treating people like background characters. This is a community.
So please, be kind and be respectful and for the love of all things sexy, do not treat people like non-player characters in your personal game of life because they're not on your to-do list today risque means slightly indecent or liable to shock especially by being sexually suggestive risque lifestyle throws the premier lifestyle parties and takeovers in the southern usa that is slightly indecent liable to shock and sexually suggestive. The hosts provide a safe, fun environment for new couples, experienced couples, and everyone in between.
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The next wild party will be March 21st to 23rd, 2025 in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. Tickets now available at risquélifestyleparties.com. You know what's sexy? Confidence. Passion. And a partner who takes their health as seriously as their pleasure. A man or woman with a clean bill of health. Now that's a turn-on. That's why I use stdhero.com. Fast, discreet STI testing. because nothing ruins the mood like awkward guessing games. Oh, test today, play tomorrow. No worries, it's just pleasure. There are no waiting rooms, no judgment.
Just fast, reliable STI testing so you can get back to what matters. Go to stdhero.com and use promo code TOL10 for 10% off your order. Get tested. Have fun. In the lifestyle though, physical attraction is not the whole equation. We have to look at people in totality to figure out if we are attracted to them physically, mentally, emotionally. Attraction is complicated as hell and it lives on a spectrum. Personality is a huge factor in our attraction in the lifestyle. As I alluded to earlier, you might meet a couple and they're both sexy as hell. They fit your physical desires perfectly.
And they're fucking assholes. What do you do? Do you accept the fact they have the personality of running mayonnaise? Or do you look at them holistically and realize that sex ain't worth the bullshit? I'm pretty sure I've used that joke about running mayonnaise before in another episode, but you know what? I fucking love it. It's a funny joke. The flip side of that might be a couple who may not fit your exact criteria, but they're fabulous people. Funny, nice, great personalities. I would argue in all cases, good personality goes a long way to fostering sexual attraction.
Because true sexual attraction, the idea that, yes, I want to run my genitals with this other person involves more than just physical compatibility. Diverging widely right here, and somebody needs to hear this, you might not have abs that you could grate cheese on. Maybe your gym membership is just a donation at this point. Look, it happens. Most people in the lifestyle, we're over 40, and gravity and carbs are our nemesis. I've heard from a lot of folks who worry that their body isn't doing them any favors in the attraction department. That's a valid concern, I get it.
The honest truth though, a killer personality beats a six-pack any fucking day. Witty, charming, funny, sultry, kind, these qualities are not just nice to have in another person, they're aphrodisiacs. You don't need to look like a Marvel superhero if you can make a woman laugh so hard she snorts. Panties have been lost to well-timed humor. More panties have been lost to well-timed humor than protein shakes. And ladies, your secret weapon? Giving a damn.
Being attentive in conversation, showing real interest, not just nodding while you're waiting for your turn to talk or that glazed over disinterested look. Make a guy feel like he is the main character. And when a man feels special, he is about three compliments away from getting an erection. A question to ask while you are pondering your preferences. What kind of connection are you looking for? Maybe you only want one night's dance or maybe you want a long-term friendship. Good things to know about what you're looking for so that you can make informed decisions when you are meeting people.
To thine own self be true. You can't tell other people what you're looking for unless you know yourself. If another couple says they're looking for a long-term friendship and all you want is a one-night stand, that is a misalignment in preferences. Misalignments are natural because every person has a different desire. Attraction will not always be mutual. Chemistry takes a bunch of ingredients to happen, but I'm not one of those science nerds that can explain it. So how do you tell if there is a misalignment here? Well, body language is one.
If the other side of the equation is physically standoffish, that's a signal. If the conversation is very one-sided, that's a signal. Couples who are interested in you, they're going to tell you that they are interested. A misalignment, though, is not bad. Recognizing it early will save you time and energy. Another misalignment might be the dreaded uneven attraction scenario. One person is really excited to proceed, the other person is not. Nothing personal against you. They may not be feeling the connection is strong. Should you persevere and push through it, hoping they change their mind?
No, no, please, fuck no, don't do that. If the chemistry ain't there, don't push it. I am willing to conjecture. There is very little you can do to change their minds. And again, that would be a waste of time and energy. More compatibility things to think about. Another factor is play style. If you're looking for a soft swap couple, that is what you prefer, right? Then going after a full swap couple is not going to work. Maybe the full swap couple would be willing to shift a swap, soft swap. That's the reason I say preferences are malleable.
Maybe the other couple will shift to accommodate your preference. They don't have to, though, at the fuck all. And one area that no one should shift around is safety style. As a couple, what is your stance on safety? Testing frequency? What kind of safety protocol do you look for in another couple? Does it match what you want. And just to plug it right here, stdhero.com. Use the promo code T-O-L-T- thinking, yeah, but it's just sex. You're making this too complicated, right? Am I? Figuring out what you prefer leads to better encounters in the lifestyle. And that figuring out takes time.
It takes experience. And the last factor that I thought of as I was writing this list is relationship style. What kind of relationship are you looking for? Are you the kind of couple that prefers single women or maybe single men? Do you lean more towards the polyamorous side of the lifestyle, or are you more of a one-night stand kind of thing? Do you have the bandwidth to handle a new long-term friendship? Layers, nuances, and factors. All that to say, preferences in the lifestyle are way more fucking complicated than just, I found another person that I think's hot and want to do them.
But damn it, it should be that way. If we are a community of people, we need to look at the whole person to determine attraction. Even if you are a one-night stand kind of couple, you can't make decisions based on physical attraction alone. Sooner or later, this other person is going to open their mouth. Scowlin' well-met listener, Jason summons you to his aid. The ASN Magazine Awards nominations are now open. If you enjoy that other lifestyle, then nominate this amazing show for Best Entertainment Podcast of the Year. You can vote once per day.
Let us show our support for the best lifestyle podcast out there. Go to ASN Lifestyle Magazine, awards.com, or check the show notes and vote now. In a city known for sin comes an event like no other. June 2025. Las Vegas will be taken over. The biggest lifestyle party on the planet is coming. Hotel takeovers, after parties that never end, and the hottest lifestyle couples from across the globe, ready to ignite the night. This is not just a weekend. This is a once-in-a-lifetime adventure. Join That Other Lifestyle for a gathering so epic it can only happen in Las Vegas.
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For links or more info, visit www.mohasadventures.com. That's www.mojasadventures.com. Are you ready for more? That was a list of stuff, and now your head is spinning because you're trying to figure out what the hell you're attracted to. I hope I have made you completely question everything you thought you knew. We figured out our personal criteria that we're looking for in potential naked friends. What do you do with them now? You share them. You make a seven-foot-tall banner and you wave it around at parties. You create a handy checklist that you can share with prospective partners.
Ask the couple to write a book report. I'm exaggerating. Just a little bit, but not by much. I've seen some shit. There are couples out there that will write out every little factor they are looking for in their profiles on the adult dating sites, down to the amount of body hair you should have. Other couples, they don't share shit. Too big extremes, and I feel you should land somewhere in the middle. You could use your profile as a way to filter out incompatible people.
Most sites have fields where you can denote how important physical appearance is or intelligence, high, medium, low kind of scale. Will people look at that and consider what you desire? Probably fucking not. To be honest, most people flipping through profiles, they're just looking for pictures. That's their criteria. And you, dear listeners, I know you're not in that population. We will use the fields that are available to accurately describe what we're looking for. In a nice way, you can share whatever you want in your profile text. Be as descriptive as possible.
For example, what I see couples will put in their bio section, for instance, like, no single men, please. That is a preference that they're expressing. They are not interested in interacting with single men. If you are a single man and you see this on their profile, don't think, oh, well, I'm special and this doesn't apply to me. No, it fucking does. They took the time to write it and you need to respect it. Another one I see on profiles a lot is HWP. Teaching everyone a new acronym today. HWP. It means Height Weight Proportional.
As in, this couple is looking for a couple that are in relatively good shape. In other words, their weight is proportional to their height. But Jason, sounds kind of exclusionary because some people might not be height-weight proportional, and this couple is excluding them. Yes, and? And I found that people who have a problem with seeing HWP on a profile are the ones who are not height-weight proportional. This is a good thing. Look at it as positive. When a couple uses that phrase in their profile, you now have information to make an informed decision on whether to reach out to them or not.
Are you and your spouse highway proportional? That is a personal judgment call you can make. And to address this too, don't reach out to people that, based on the preferences they listed in their bio, would not be interested in you. Sounds jackass, I know, but reaching out to couples that are incompatible with you is a jackass thing to do. Giving you the honest truth here, you are not special enough that this couple will suddenly change their criteria for you. That is when there is rejection, someone gets butthurt, and pissy. Literally, you just did it to yourself.
I know I tell people to take their shots, swing for the fucking fences, because you never know what might happen. I get that. Sometimes you just want to try your hand and to you I say best of luck. But look, if they want to play golf and all you have is a soccer ball, there's a misalignment. Nobody's going to have fun there. Another one to share. BBC or no BBC. Big Black Hawk. Some couples are looking for Big Black Hawk. Some couples are not it. And to address the elephant in the room, someone will ask, wouldn't that be racist since you're excluding someone based on their race?
What about big white cock? In this case, I say no. BBC is a specific kink that people may or may not have, and they're not making a judgment call about you as a person. They know what they're looking for in terms of sexual encounters. They're not handing out bank loans here. In this case, race is a variable in an attraction, not the totality. It's no different than someone having an age preference or a bisexuality preference. A couple may choose to exclude someone based upon their age, or they may only be looking for a bisexual woman.
This is about someone's personal choices for who they want to fuck. If you don't meet the criteria that a couple is looking for, stop taking it personally. No one is asking you to change to fit their mold. They have a mold. They have a type. You have a mold and you have a type. If that doesn't match up, it does not mean there is a deficiency in you at all. Now, should you lay out all your preferences in your profile? Short answer, share as much as you're comfortable with. Long answer, just remember, the smaller the net, the fewer the fish.
If your profile reads like a highly specific casting call for a documentary about the French Revolution, don't be surprised when only a handful of people fit the part. Real-life scenario, say a couple reaches out and they're just not your type. Whatever criteria you're using, they don't check the boxes. No big deal, right? Be gracious, be honest, a simple, you seem like great people, but I don't think we're a good match. Thanks for reaching out. That does the job.
You don't need to write them a dissertation on why their particular combination of genetics, rooming choices, and personal style did not ignite the fire in your loins. And for the love of all things sexy, do not be an ass about it. I have heard horror stories. A couple gets the bravery to reach out, then they get hit back with a fucking rage essay from the people offended that someone dare message them without meeting their exact specifications. Chill the fuck out.
If you don't list out your preferences on your profile, don't act shocked and just gassed when people outside your type shoot their shot. Knowledge is power, and if someone lacks knowledge about what you're looking for, what the fuck did you expect to happen? You're always allowed to say no.
Consent is king, and you have 100% control over over who gets to touch you but there is a way to say no thanks without being a complete and total dick about it manners are sexy too if someone says you are not their type take it gracefully don't try to figure out why you don't fit their type don't try to change their minds just accept it and move on yes i've heard horror stories going in the direction. Couples tell other couples they're not interested and the other couple then decides to nitpick and question and try to overcome all the objections.
Say no gracefully and kindly and accept a no gracefully and kindly, which this begs the question of how closely are you going to stick to your preferences? Look, if you only want redheads, like I mentioned, that you only find redheads attractive. Are you sticking to that no matter what? Ain't a lot of redheads out there. So you need to be able to answer that question. Do these people need to be a perfect match or is there wiggle room?
And I can tell you from personal experience, a good personality, super attractive, but you won't be able to learn about someone's personality if you're only going off superficial physical appearance. What you look for in a couple can evolve. You are not locked into what Thank you. but you won't be able to learn about someone's personality if you're only going off superficial physical appearance. What you look for in a couple can evolve. You are not locked into what you found attractive when you join the lifestyle versus once you have experience.
I find generally people's preferences expand with time, which is a good thing. Now, a bit of pro advice. Know your partner's preferences. Like you know their shoe size, right? Or their favorite food or their favorite TV show. Just like you know what they prefer in the vanilla world. You need to know who will fit your partner's attraction radar. Here's why. Let's say you're the one who handles all the social media stuff. You scan the size, you do the messaging, making connections, planning all the activities. You find a promising couple. You got them lined up.
You're all excited because you did good and then plot twist. You show the picture to your spouse and womp womp, nothing. Nope, dry loins. No pulse or excitement. Boom. All that time wasted and the connection is dead on arrival. Now you're sitting there dejected and upset. Could this have been avoided possibly? Do yourself and your spouse a favor. Get on the same page. Know what they like. What makes them say, I want that? It saves time and effort. Communication is sexy and efficient. How do you go about figuring this out though?
There's two scenarios that are going to happen when you ask your spouse about it. Your spouse will either have a really good picture in their mind that they can share with you or the other scenario. They haven't a fucking clue. You ask them, they're like, I don't know something. To figure out the physical aspects, ask your spouse about movie stars and celebrities they find attractive. I'm willing to bet that after they've named the 10th person, you're going to be able to gather up the data and create a decent amalgamation in your brain of their type.
The other data point we need is personality, you know, like tall, dark, and handsome, suave, swagger, something. Ask yourself, ask your spouse about conversations they remember. What about the conversation makes it memorable? It could be with anyone, could be about anything. What we're looking for though is the through line, either positive or negative. Maybe they remember a conversation with a co-worker that was really funny, or maybe they remember a time when someone gave them a backhanded compliment, and nope, they didn't like that.
Another option is ask about fictional characters they resonate with. So maybe it's Dracula, you know, mysterious stranger coming in the night, or something, ha, or a character who's like really suave and funny. Don't be sneaky about this either when you're asking them. Tell them what the fuck you're doing and tell them why you want this information. I always appreciate hearing your feedback and comments on episodes or suggestions for topics, so feel free to reach out to me at host at thatofthelifestyle.com and my website thatofthelifestyle.com.
My personal disclaimer, I am not a medical professional or a trained and certified educator of any kind in any way. I am a guy with a microphone sharing my personal experiences with you. This podcast is for entertainment purposes only, and please join us for the next episode. Whatever you may do today, I hope you have a fantastic time doing it. Know that you are appreciated and loved. Have a great day. Thank you.
