Identity

Transcript

Speaker1: Good morning, good afternoon, good evening. Wherever you are, I hope you have blue skies, a breeze on your back, and sand between your toes. Welcome to the Other Lifestyle Podcast. I am your host, Jason. Leave vanilla behind as we talk about identity. This show is for adults only. We will talk about sex, relationships, the lifestyle, and ethical non-monogamy in an honest way with lots of real talk. If you are under 18, please stop listening. Go find a different show. Around here on the beaches of sexual freedom, consent, education, and good times, everyone is welcome. Lifestyle, vanilla, or the curious. Whatever your gender identity, expression, truth, flavor, hey, you are welcome here. I do my best to use inclusive language, though you may hear words like husband or wife or man or woman to keep things simple. My email address is host at thatotherlifestyle.com. My website is thatotherlifestyle.com. You really like what I do and you want some more, you can join the after party at patreon.com. So this is your reminder. Go get tested. For the best lifestyle parties and takeovers, check out RisqueLifestyleParties.com. Risque Lifestyle Parties, they are throwing an awesome glow takeover the first weekend of May. That's April 30th through May 2nd in Fort Walton Beach, Florida on Okaloosa Island. If you've ever been there, you know that this area is beautiful. White beaches, warm gulf water. The resort is top notch. This time around, it is a glow party, which is my favorite theme. Let me shine with a muted purple light of neon abandon. My wife is getting our office ready, and I want everyone listening to please come check it out with us. Tickets and details are available at risquélifestyleparties.com. There is no other takeover in the United States like this. You get the full beach experience without having to travel all the way to the Caribbean. is fried from applying for jobs every day. Hundreds of applications thrown into the digital ether to be chewed up. Due to my current unemployed situation, I now have to interact with LinkedIn on a daily basis, a virulent cesspool of social media fueled by corporate dreams, pandering, and slavish devotion to the gospel of AI. I see people post the most asinine stories about life and their jobs, sharing ridiculous situations as narrative framing devices for their personal business. So many people do this. People can't just say, oh, hey, customer satisfaction is important. No, they have to create a whole narrative about how they reach this brilliant realization like they are perpetually answering interview questions. I refuse to believe that a person gained any fucking business insights from their toddler asking about avocado toast one morning. I see how professionals share near orgasmic joy in fulfilling a client's request. That's called doing the fucking job. There is no need to whack off about it. Self-aggrandizing lies to promote themselves within this echo chamber of corporate sycophants worshipping at the altar of acronyms smearing pointless cheap corporate accolades on themselves. Okay, before we talk about lifestyle, dumbest corporate story I got. Dumb is not the right word. I don't know the right word. Maybe you can help me find the right word. I worked at a company years ago, and we had an all-employee symposium. The last day, the last half of the last day, was devoted to work-life balance, which is a really important concept, right? Oh, man. The CEO stood up in front of everyone. She had this very proud look in her eyes, I still remember, staring into the stage lights like she was reciting psalms proudly. She shared that she gave birth to her second child one morning, and by that afternoon, like four hours later, she was working on a client proposal in the hospital bed, hours after giving birth. This was confirmed. It happened. It was confirmed by one of the VPs chuckling about it and going, oh, yeah, yeah. They were proud of this shit. I believe she shared this story to show how committed she was to the business that she fucking owned, that we as employees without a financial stake in the company beyond our paycheck should emulate. No, fuck no. The air of superiority radiating from this woman was thick and heavy. of her identity as a CEO, as a boss woman. I refuse to use the term girl boss ever, even though she did all the fucking time. She made her position as CEO her whole identity. And identity, that's what we're going to talk about today. For all those people on LinkedIn using that platform to celebrate their corporate accomplishments, I oddly respect it. To have a purpose, to have an identity that is so sure, so cemented, that they could never see themselves as anything else, anything other than a project manager or a BSE, Alpha Trion account architect certified in Lean Six Sigma with a specialty in managerial Optimus Prime. Their identity is locked in. I respect it. To be completely honest, I fucking respect it. To be so sure of oneself in a world of shifting noises that constantly want you to agree or get angry, to be sure of oneself, I guess is a blessing. Lack of Doubt over who a person is. It's a strength. It's a personal character's strength. I admit, I lack that surety about myself, and I'm still unsure of what the fuck I want to do when I grow up. These people, I see them every day, are sure of their personal identity markers, sure of a title bestowed by a corporation. Their position is how they identify themselves to the larger human tribe. Look, my last gig, I had four titles at one point. A sequence of nonsensical words strung together, telling the world, here I am, here is my value to society and what my status is. Identity. How we mark ourselves, prove values to others, prove value to ourselves. And look, fuck me. We got this in the lifestyle. Being a culture created by human hands and minds, yeah, we have something similar to this in the lifestyle. Not our jobs, our play dynamics. I'm in a couple of group chats. And I see couples will share intro posts or trading cards, whatever you want to call it. They drop a picture and then they drop a whole write-up about themselves. And it's an elevator pitch, to borrow a term from the corporate world. 30 seconds to share everything important about themselves as a couple and go. Everyone should have an elevator pitch either memorized or typed up ready to go. You can just save a copy in your phone. What should that elevator pitch include? Names? Either real or not. And names, I need to go on a diversion here. I was talking to friends this weekend about names and how many people use fake names. There are people, I am positive, I have seen their buttholes, I have had sex with them, and I don't know their real actual legal name. We decided to be fair. We decided to not call it a fake name anymore. We're going to call it their lifestyle name. And yeah, for discretion, these couples don't want their real names out there, so they pick a pseudonym. That dude's real name is Sam, and he goes by Tom. That lady's real name is Mary, and she goes by Beth, that sort of thing. And my friend and I are kicking ourselves because we could have picked really cool new names. We could have picked our own nicknames. She wanted to be Barbie Sparkles. I would have been Max Power if I had the choice. Or Thundercock. Like, oh, hey, did you invite the Thundercocks to the party? Missed opportunity. Anyway, elevator pitch. The elevator pitch establishes a couple's identity and the lifestyle, and it can be given in an actual elevator that's happened to me or on a dance floor or is dropped in conversation. It is sharing quickly and succinctly how and who we like to fuck. Names, where you live, who's your spouse, what is your personal play dynamics. And pro tip for the newbies out there, if a couple ask about your play dynamics, they're asking because they want to know if your style matches their style and if there's a possibility of fucking. They're interested. Don't miss that signal. Distill guidance from marketing when crafting an elevator, speech, pitch, proposal. Use action words, make it impactful, make it exciting, engaging when writing it out. And like I said, save it in the notes of your phone, just so you always have it. If you're going to do it, make sure you have a hook of some sort. Mention a hobby, a trip coming up, a fact about you as a couple that someone could latch onto when starting a conversation. I like comic books. I will mention how much of a nerd I am. Other couples who are nerdy like me, they're going to latch on to that and want to engage with us. Today, specifically, I want to call attention to play dynamics regarding the way we identify ourselves to others. And I'm going to say dynamics instead of style. I feel the term style is simplistic and reductive, either full swap or soft swap. Dynamics, that incorporates a bigger picture that includes more of the factors around the ways a couple can have sex. Same room, separate, dating separately, voyeur, exhibitionist, all these other factors that make our lives spicy. Play dynamics as an identifier is strong, just as strong as a job title in the vanilla world. How do you like to fuck other people? When and how? A few words can convey so much information to a couple, just like a job title. A couple's play dynamics or drop in conversation, used for vetting. Decisions are made around these words. That's why they are important. In the vanilla world, people tell you what they do for work, which is very similar to the lifestyle in that play dynamics tell you how people do people. Haha. Fuck me, I'm going to use the word play a lot in this episode. I said it before, I don't like that word in this context because it feels like a sanitized, socially acceptable, friendly term for what we're really talking about. A coded word for fucking. When people ask about playing, I want to respond so bad. Oh, you mean you want to get naked and fuck around until we're both sweaty, panty messes? Yeah, let's do that. Sex, physical context of genitals, dick sucking, anal, all that distilled down into the word play. For simplicity, let's go with playing, but I just need you to know that I know that I mean fucking. The vanilla world. A job title, that identity marker, is usually given or assigned. I literally have to apply to a job in order to get a new job title. We don't really control that. Our work identity is given or it's earned or however you want to get it. And the lifestyle, though, big difference. We have power. We have way more power in that we can decide what our play dynamics are ourselves. No one is here handing out full swap collectible trading cards. No, we pick it. We do that. We have the power, which is fucking wild if you think about it. Where else in life do we get to assign to ourselves an identity marker all our own, created ourselves, independent of any outside factors? Then we have the power to share those identity markers with others whatever way we want. And one of the most popular ways to share it is that elevator pitch or a trading card or an intro post or something in a chat group. Couples are sharing their elevator pitches in chat groups, sharing their identity markers with others in conversations. All the fucking time. And think of this like sharing a social media profile in real time. I have ours ready to go. I'm Jason. This is my wife. We're a full swap couple, though open to other dynamics if the vibe is right. We tend to be a slow burn couple, and we value connections and friendships. We are looking for couples that we are mutually attracted to and want long-term engagements. We use protection and want to discuss sexual health prior to any activities. Super simple. That's it. I don't know how long that took me. A couple of seconds, right? I share our names. Our usual play dynamics with the caveat that, yeah, we can try other stuff. I mentioned that we tend to take things slowly and probably are not one-night-stand people. I mentioned that we like four-way connections and, again, are looking for long-term friendships versus sport fucking. And there's our stance on sexual health. These are all factors that are important to us. If I wanted to add something to this, I'd probably mention I really like comic books and I work out a lot and my wife enjoys shopping. Something like that about her hobbies or her interest. Let's do another one. Hi, my name is Bill. This is my wife Brenda Liu. We are a full swap couple who enjoys group play. We think you are attractive and would like to get to know you better. Would you like to come up to our room for a drink? We are feeling really good chemistry right now and would like to get to know you two better. Different pitch. Different vibe. More direct. And you can tell they are not from the American South because they said you two instead of y'all. Come up to our hotel room and fuck us kind of energy. More direct, which is fine. In my experience, those looking for one-night stands or sport-fucking, they're going to forgo words. They're going to forgo an elevator pitch entirely, and instead they're going to use a picture book to illustrate what the fuck they want right now. Both instances convey play dynamics in a direct way. Same as a LinkedIn profile. These elevator pitches tell everyone else who we are, what we think is important, all of that. And for the newbies, what do all these labels mean? Which one is right for you as a couple? What are the considerations? And when crafting a lifestyle identity, knowing what these dynamics are, which one is right for a couple, is so fucking important. If for nothing else, to save a lot of awkward conversations when everyone is naked. There are different dynamics in the lifestyle. Everyone knows this. People are most familiar with soft swap and full swap. But once you dig into it and think about it, it can get a lot more complicated with a lot more quantifiers. And I cannot share an exhaustive list because I have no idea all the different ways that people fuck each other out there one thing I do want to get away from is thinking about dynamics as a ladder of escalation there is no linear path to this and dynamics can shift four people could be necking in a bed decide oh hey let's go full swap right now or a couple may decide to play separately on a random Saturday night at hotel takeover it's fluid okay our play styles are part of our lifestyle identity all play styles are valid they're valid and couples can choose how they want to to do this in whatever way they want. What matters is, does it match up with that couple you're talking to? If a couple tells me they're soft swap, I am not going to be the one to try and convince them to go full swap, just like if we're at a party and we decide we are no swap ahead of time, I don't need someone trying to convince my mind. We need to respect the playstyle of others, and if it doesn't match up to our own, it's okay to move on. No harm in that choice. That's why a good elevator pitch is important, It lets people know what everyone wants up front. Play dynamics are personal labels we give ourselves. I want people to know that all the other considerations in different play dynamics, which I will break down in a minute because I just feel like rambling today. These labels are powerful. These labels influence how others see us just like jobs do, job titles. I'm not going to run to a race car driver to ask them for help with a spreadsheet. this is a shitty thing to say, but hey, let's say it anyway. People are going to judge a couple's play dynamics just like they judge a job title in the vanilla world. We are humans and people want to figure out their social standing in groups. We make assumptions of income if someone says they're a doctor. We also make assumptions about people based on their play dynamics. So, a good example? Gangbangs. These are intense fucking activities. Not my personal thing, but I am not judging anyone for it. I mention these because I've been involved in conversations where people judge others for their participation or enjoyment in these gangbangs? And it's fucking wrong, man. No different than a CEO looking down on a truck driver based on that person's identity, their job. People will take their preferred method of fucking as the only proper and right one. And it's not. The only measure we should use is, is it safe, is it consensual, and is it fun? After that, rock on. I may not want to participate. I may decline an offer based on the dynamics presented. Yes, certainly as hell ain't gonna tell anyone what they do is wrong or judge them for it. For instance, tell you a story. We met a couple that only did girl-on-girl play. They had a very strong disdain for full-swap couples. Why the fuck were they talking to you, Jason? Ah, they thought my wife was hot. Anything involving penetration, they were vocal about their opposition. They held their view that only bisexual women were allowed to play in this regard very highly. I cannot stress how fucking uppity they were, about this and they shared all of this and then to which we responded yeah we're full swap and my wife is really not attracted to that other wife completely burst her bubble they stopped talking to us which is totally fine based on our identity we weren't a match for what they were looking for which is good in hindsight it shows the power of owning our own personal play dynamics in this and dynamics all right let's talk about these in depth since i talked about Let's start there. A lot of couples start here because it feels easier. It feels like there is less pressure, which is true. Our first time, we went full swap separate room, and I do not recommend that at all. The always popular phrase, we are just dipping our toes into the water, and couples think that soft swap is that, just dipping their toes in. Oral is fine, but we don't really want to go full penetration. Okay, keep in mind, if a couple is soft swap, they're asking other couples to be soft-swap with them, and most couples in the lifestyle are not soft-swap. Soft-swap couples, you're going to have a harder time finding sexy partners just due to this dynamic. I personally have no issue with soft-swap. It's fine for whatever reason a couple chooses this. There are benefits to it. There's a slower build-up. There's more focus. I get to go back to my wife eventually. I still get to have fun with a naked woman. And couples can stay soft-swap forever. There should be no pressure to to full swap. Everyone needs to be comfortable. And as a public service announcement to the full swap couples out there, if a couple says they are soft swap, okay, things start happening. Do not pressure them into going full swap in the middle of the action or try to be sneaky and just try to slip a penis into a vagina. I promise they're going to notice. Conversely, if a couple says they are soft swap, they tell us they are soft swap. And then in the middle of the fun, one of them decides, oh, hey, it's time for full on penetration. No. We're not changing this dynamic when everyone has horny brain. We're all going to calm the fuck down, let the blood settle, and then we're going to discuss it. I'm not a fan of surprises around sex at all, ever. And this is a big fucking surprise and a big change in motion that needs a discussion. Going full swap. Most couples in the lifestyle are full swap. Full stop. They are. We're in this for fucking, and full swap is fucking. I guess it's true that full swap is the default and that other dynamics are kind of a variation of that. And I guess that sounds right. There's no really better way to put it. Since full swap is the default, most people understand the dynamics and questions and boundaries and stuff around full swap. Most conversations are geared towards full swap. Like if we were doing soft swap, I don't really have to worry about a woman's opinion on choking or being held down, right? It's not going to happen. It's not a thing that's going to come up during SoftSwap. More of a thing during FullSwap. May not be the best example. My brain is fried. With FullSwap, protection is definitely a bigger concern. Needs to be talked about. That is not to say that SoftSwap is inherently safe. It is not. Even Girl on Girl is not 100% safe, okay? There are STIs that can't exist in the throat, and guess how they got there? Oral sex. With FullSwap, sexual health and practices need to be part of the discussion ahead of time. There's definitely more pressure on men to perform. You gotta keep that dick up. And there's also the thing of seeing your spouse having sex with another person. Are you ready for that? You better be in the right fucking headspace for that. Better make sure there's good communication all around. Okay, that's two. Soft swap, full swap. The binary. But it's more complicated. Two of the simple identity markers, but we can go deeper. We can go harder. Let's figure out other ways we can identify our play dynamics. A lot of couples, will make a distinction of same room only. No separate plate. Why? Same room, same bed is good for couples who want that shared experience. They have high compersion and they want to be a part of their partner's pleasure. It might be touching or kissing or having a reassurance of knowing your partner's hand is right there for you. They're excited by the act, by the proximity to the action. They like the idea of being able to join in the fun, checking in on each other. I can tell you, totally honest here, it can be a little shocking when you're in the in the middle of sex with a woman, and suddenly there is a man hand snicking its way between us. It's there. It can be shocking. Yeah, all this sounds like sunshine or rainbows, right? When no one ever mentions about same room, same bed, be it soft or full swap, this can cause anxiety for some people. They might get overwhelmed by comparison, for instance. Dudes get in their heads at the sight of another man's penis. Oh my god, is he bigger than me? They get in their heads worried about that. I'm gonna tell you, first time I ever saw, like, a big dick like an abnormally big dick. My first thought wasn't, oh no, this man is bigger than me. I am sad. Wasn't my first thought. My first thought was, oh, that's not going to fit in my wife. Dicks are dicks. Some are bigger, some are smaller. Main point is, does it work? And ladies, y'all are not immune to this either. Seeing another naked woman could cause feelings of insecurity about your own body. People can get bothered by same room action. Oh, my wife never makes those noises for me. Is he enjoying that blowjob too much? What happens if I come first. They might be more interested in the fantasy of doing this versus the real thing. Kind of like anal. Couples like same room because their partners are there during the act. It offers comfort. It offers protection. They feel safer doing what they're doing knowing that their spouse is right there. They may also like to watch and I need to talk about that too. Another pervasive myth on the lifestyle. You have to you enjoy watching your partner have sex. You have to be right there, all up in there. Don't you dare fucking blink. This is required. And you know what? It's not true. A lot of people think this. I feel a lot of people put themselves in situations where they're kind of uncomfortable with because there is a narrative that we all have to enjoy same room on the same bed at the same time. And look, you don't. You can be honest and say you just don't. It is not a rejection of your spouse or their pleasure or the other couple. It may be something a person is not comfortable with. with and they shouldn't force themselves into being uncomfortable. I'm being honest about it. I, me, I really don't care about watching other people have sex. Yeah, if it's my wife, all right, cool. Other people, kind of neutral. I'm just not a watcher kind of person. And to be honest, I don't know what to do with my hands. Should I clap? Should I cheer them on? Should I touch myself while making a creepy smile? What do I do with my hands while I'm watching other people have sex? And do you stare at it? Do you blink a lot? Do you just smile? Too much for my OCD brain to try and figure out. What am I supposed to do? Generally, if I am involved, great. And if I am not, it might be time for a water break. It might be time to step out. And I think that's a decent enough segue. Leads us to separate room, separate plate, maybe separate bed. Here's a real example from the big book adjacent. a problem for me. Because I am big. I am 200 pounds of muscle. My fucking shoulders are three feet wide. I'm not totally exaggerating here. Big fucking guy and trying to cram me plus three other people into a queen-size bed? It gets cramped. I'm not in my head about my dick working. I'm in my head worried about accidentally elbowing someone or kicking them, or if I fuck to the point of exhaustion, I'm gonna need an empty spot cleared so I can crash. I'm in my lane, trying to do my own thing, and my gravity, the crater I am creating on this bed is causing the other people to just slide towards me. Logistics. Separate beds and same room as possible. You get a full-out couch for your bedroom, and then boom, two beds, or a couch, or the floor, or against a wall. There's options here. Okay, one of those options is separate room. This is a big step. This is a big step over the line. Separate rooms could be two different in the same house or it could be two separate hotel rooms. It is a separation of spouses and partners. One consideration for this is the compersion aspect. If a couple really likes being part of their spouse's pleasure, you're definitely going to miss out on that. Unless you record it, which can be fun too. What does a couple need for separate room play? To open up that door and try it? Trust. There has to be a high level of trust with another couple for this to happen. Why? Well, my wife, take my wife. I shouldn't make that joke. I'm sorry. With my wife, don't fucking choke her. Not her thing at all. And she is not going off with anyone unless I am completely confident and sure that motherfucker ain't going to try something when I'm not around. Rules have to be established and everyone has to trust everyone else to respect those rules and boundaries. To me, yes, separate play is a big deal. For me to trust another person with my wife, my most precious, amazing, beautiful wife, that's commitment on my part. and I don't commit to shit lightly. There are benefits to separate room. Focus. Instead of having another couple in the room making noises and getting in the way and worrying about kicking them, two people can focus on each other without distractions. I do like this. I don't have to worry about accidentally rolling onto another man. Another benefit is pacing. With same room, there is a compulsion. There is another pervasive myth to keep on the same pace. If one couple is doing oral, then the other couple does oral. If one couple switches to sex, then the other couple switches to sex. The truth is, that's bullshit. Everyone can fuck at their own pace. Some people are going to argue with me, and I'm going to argue right the fuck back. Maybe I want to lick a pussy for 10 minutes, and the other dude skips it and goes straight for glory. That should be okay. Again, it's out there. It's this narrative. It's a myth that we all have to stay in sync and come at the same time. We fucking don't. is fully separate play. This leans more towards open marriage kind of thing. A wife is going to go out on a date while the husband does something else, maybe a friend instead. I don't have a lot of experience with this dynamic, to be honest. I'm not opposed to it, it just hasn't come up. Fully separate play exists in this weird middle ground between, like, having a fully open marriage and swinging. Swinging should involve playing with our partners, while an open marriage may not involve our partners. I don't know. It's hard to figure this one out. If this is a person's preferred method, rock on. I would imagine. It takes a lot of trust. Probably some sexual gratification, knowing what your partner is doing. There's a fantasy here. I don't know, so I'm just going to leave this one hanging until I think about it later. Group play. Fucking orgies. Orgies are weird. Some couples only do orgies. I met a few of those, and all I can think is, how the fuck do you find all these people to get together and have an orgy? That's really hard. I did a whole episode on orgies. You can go listen to that. Group play is a lot. Multiple people having sex in a room together. It is a lot of fucking. It is a lot of stimulation. Focusing is out the fucking window at this point. This is now a roller coaster of heathen activity and we are all hanging on for dear life. Sometimes there's order. Sometimes there's not. Sometimes there is an empty opportunity so to speak and people just jump in. episode talking about surprise orgies, which do happen versus planned orgies, the feelings that an orgy can cause. That's all in that old episode, I think. My only new guidance for orgies is keep an eye on your spouse. Make sure they're not left out of the fun. Check in on them before, during, and after. Please do that. It's real fucking easy to get that left out feeling, that unwanted feeling during an orgy. And make sure everyone gets a turn. If one lady gets spit-roasted, offer the same to all the other ladies. Give everyone an equal chance to experience the fun. If I get a double blowjob, hey, maybe my friend would like one as well. All these elements and considerations come back to identity. Identity of play dynamics for a couple in the lifestyle. How we identify each other and ourselves to the greater community. And this is not just logistics. Not just who touches what, when, why, and how, where. This is vital information. Figuring out the correct identity marker makes life so much easier. when you start and it gives you a place to evolve from in the future if you want. And yeah, all these things I'm talking about, they're labels. Labels are useful though, especially in that elevator pitch. They speed up this whole process of finding people we click with. Helps to avoid awkward naked conversations about what people want in the moment in a hotel room. Some people do shy away from labels. They're like, oh no, no, we don't want to label ourselves as this or that or whatever. And my question is why? because they don't want to be locked into an identity. Like, they're freelance employees of the lifestyle. Today I'm a chef. Tomorrow I'm going to be a lawyer. That's not what's really happening here. Labels, identity, play dynamics, yes, they can change. We can change our preferences and that's okay. We are not locked into these particular labels like we are a job title for years and years and years. There's no shame in changing play dynamics. I embrace the ability to change our personal dynamics. whenever the fuck we want we're not afraid to label ourselves we're not afraid of a label of being full swap because we can just as easily change it it comes down to we have power my wife and i over our dynamic no one else no one else can tell us what to do i'm not going to shy away from labeling ourselves because i can unlike corporate working jobs that give you a title here we make our own title we make our own identity in a way that i'm comfortable with And that's a big difference between the vanilla world and the lifestyle. Here, we have way more control over what we do and with whom than out there among all the non-spicy people. The power over our dynamics is fucking beautiful. We can try something once, decide, nope, don't like that, but we don't have to identify ourselves with that dynamic ever again. Nothing is locked in. Do not embrace a dynamic that you are not comfortable with. Don't tell people you're really into hardcore stuff in an attempt to sound cool or just be part of the crowd. Stand by your personal identity. Stand by your personal dynamic. Thank you for listening and tuning in every week. Make sure you tell a friend about the show. And thank you to the love of my life, my wife, who is on this wonderful lifestyle journey with me. If you want to reach out, ask me a question, suggest a topic, argue with me, you can send me an email to host at thatofthelifestyle.com. My website is thatofthelifestyle.com. And the Patreon, haha, is patreon.com slash that other lifestyle. If you like what you hear and you want to send me a tip, you can do that at buymeacoffee.com slash that other lifestyle. My personal disclaimer, I'm not a medical professional nor a trainer certified educator of any kind in any way. I'm a guy with a microphone sharing my personal experiences with you. This podcast is for entertainment purposes only and please join us for the next episode. Go to stdhero.com, use my promo code TOL15 for 15% off your order and get tested. And don't Don't forget about Luminous, the Risqué Lifestyle Party, coming up May 1st, weekend of May. Go to the website risquélifestyleparties.com for tickets. Whether you may do today or tonight, do it with enthusiasm, consent, curiosity, and a whole bunch of spice. You're appreciated, loved, and I will see you for the next episode.