Episode 2: First Time Jitters

Transcript

Warning, the following podcast contains adult content, adult language, and adult situations. I talk openly about sex and explicit topics. If you are under the age of 18 or are uncomfortable listening to sexually explicit narratives, please listen no further. I am not a professional therapist, counselor, or doctor. I'm just an average guy in the swinger lifestyle who likes to share his experiences. This podcast is for informational and entertainment purposes only. Please don't forget to subscribe to our channel. or doctor.

I'm just an average guy in the swinger lifestyle who likes to share his experiences. This podcast is for informational and entertainment purposes only. Please seek a professional if you are in need of advice, guidance, or care as it relates to sexual health or alternative lifestyles. Welcome to Evan Swings, a podcast about the swinger lifestyle from a male perspective. My perspective. I'm your host, Evan Deenson. Not my real name. I use Evan for discretion.

I'm actually an elementary school teacher, and if it were to be made public that I was a swinger, I doubt my school district would look favorably on it. In fact, I think I'd be out of a job, done with my career. And that's one of the crazy things about this lifestyle. It's the negative stigma attached to it. Being a swinger is considered by most outside the lifestyle at least in my opinion to be taboo even sex in our society is just such a taboo topic it's it's always been strange to me because sex is just a normal, natural thing.

But movies, media, religions, other institutions out there, they consider it to be almost a bad thing. So that's another reason why I wanted to make this podcast. If I can just reach one person, if one person listens to this podcast and decides, you know what, swinging is not something to be ashamed of, it's something to be embraced, it's something to be loved, then you know what, I'd consider this a success. But I certainly think I have my work cut out for me. This world we live in is not an accepting one.

And that's why, as my wife Eva and I have learned, the lifestyle community is generally a very accepting one. Now, we've run into we've run into very few jerk wads in the lifestyle now don't get me wrong they exist they exist everywhere but generally speaking our experience with others has been so unbelievably positive it it's tough to find another lifestyle couple who feels differently, I think. Our experience in the lifestyle has been nothing short of absolutely amazing. Eva and I have been in it. It's approaching three years now and it has just been the most fulfilling thing ever.

Sexually, emotionally, socially, all around, just unbelievably awesome. Okay. And there's been, there's been, you know, ups and downs, but overall just unbelievably awesome. On this podcast, I want to tell you about some of those unbelievably awesome experiences and even some of the not-so-unbelievably-awesome experiences that may not have gone as planned, but they helped us grow as a couple and helped us learn how to navigate the lifestyle better. Now, again, I'm a teacher and I tell my students, you learn through making mistakes. And Eva and I have made plenty.

but it's important that we look back on them as positive experiences that helped us make better decisions in the future. So my goal for this podcast is to share our stories and our adventures in hopes that others can learn from them or just be entertained by them. In my last episode, I talked about how Eva and I made the decision to get into the lifestyle. So I wanted to talk about two things in this episode. One, the few months that led up to our first quote-unquote encounter, I don't know what you want to call it, an experience, a swap, a date, whatever you want to call it.

I guess I should use the official swinger terminology and say playdate. Okay, so the few months leading up to our first playdate, and two, our first playdate. Like, what happened? You know, how did it go?

So just to quickly recap from episode one, Eva surprised me on Valentine's Day 2021 in the morning by telling me she was ready to help me fulfill one of my fantasies, having threesome with another woman it was a defining moment in our marriage and and really our lives it changed everything in an instant all right Eva will she'll tell you that she didn't think I would actually go through with it I mean she was she was seriously ready and willing, but she just didn't think I would jump in head first. I'm kind of a shy, reserved person, socially speaking.

So she thought if it was going to happen, it was going to be a long, long time. But boy, did I prove her wrong. I almost immediately signed up on a few of the alternative dating apps that are out there. I think the first one was called Taboo. And I was so new at it that I didn't know what to do or what to expect. I did have my DJ partner at my disposal. in episode one i talked to i talked about how uh I talked about him and how he played a huge role in getting me turned on to the lifestyle. But before I talked to him, I jumped right into some apps.

Taboo was the first, and I wasn't overly impressed. And then I found Bicupid and 3Fun. Those are the ones. Those were very interesting to me. I made a profile for Eva and myself. And I started liking other profiles. It wasn't long before I had a few responses. And it seemed like we were almost like we were fresh meat all right and a lot of other couples just wanted to get the first bite now this was uh february and at the moment my focus was a threesome so as luck would have it a woman saw our profile and initiated a conversation. Now, looking back, she must have been pretty darn experienced.

She knew what she was doing and how to get me all riled up.

Now, again, you have to understand I am brand new to this at the time and i suddenly find myself chatting with this attractive woman who starts engaging me in very sexually charged banter all right like she told me she wanted my dick and and she asked for pics of it and uh she told me what she was going to do if she ever saw us I think i was hard for hours just chatting with her off and on it was amazing you know i it it felt dirty it felt naughty but i also knew that i was allowed to be doing this even knew all about this and and she was fine with it so i I thought my fantasy, my threesome, was going to happen sooner than expected.

Not to ruin the suspense, the threesome never happened, and it still never has. More than three years later as I record this. Because right now, as I record this, it is currently March of 2024. But things evolved and changed, as you will see. I kept chatting with couples, just seeing what was out there. Okay. On one of these apps, I started talking with a couple from Indianapolis. They were very attractive. They were around our age. and I considered it within driving distance. And those are three factors that mean a lot to us and still mean a lot to us. Are they attractive?

Are they about our age? And are they within driving distance?

Now, age, not so much of an importance anymore but but there is some some importance to it and this couple i was talking to they were brand new to the lifestyle as well it was at this time where my my mind deviated a bit from my threesome quest i thought that swapping with another couple would be equally as awesome as a threesome and eva was open to that as well so i continued chatting with this couple and and some others after a lot of discussion and consideration eva and i decided that the the Indianapolis couple would be the best choice for our first ever lifestyle experience.

Chatting with them, they were on board too. Okay, but they had younger kids than us and scheduling a meetup was proving to be a problem. It was proving to be difficult I mean we just wanted to meet them and we had trouble doing that so my memory of the time frame is a bit fuzzy but I think it was somewhere around late March that we decided to try and figure out a date and a place to meet and as I I said, it was just very difficult. We live in the Dayton, Ohio area, and the two-plus-hour drive, my dogs are barking. Okay, I had to stop there for a moment. I had to stop the recording.

My dogs dogs were barking and so now i have to pick up where i left off now where did i leave off i think i left off um we were having a hard time uh finding a date for this indianapolis couple so it was just hard and that's at that point a great idea just kind of presented itself about this time i was talking with my dj partner and he was excited for us getting into the lifestyle but ironically enough he and his wife had just decided to leave the lifestyle i won't go into the reasons why uh but they were out and uh but they still had many lifestyle friends and still wanted to hang out with them on occasion he introduced me to a club in fort wayne called champagne and the club it doesn't exist anymore but but they now as hotel takeover hosts.

So at this time, the club was putting on hotel takeovers.

And for those unaware, what a hotel takeover is, is it's when a club or a company rents the entire hotel and they have a party where every single person in attendance is a swinger well my partner told me about champagne so i joined their website and their facebook page and looked at the hotel takeover dates june 5th and 6th in indianapolis hmm that's where our new friends lived so long story short we registered for the hotel takeover if nothing else my dj partner and his wife could introduce us to their friends and and we can just see what it was all about you know the the swinger world it it opened up to us very quickly okay um posted her profile on the Champagne site and joined their Facebook group and we got lots of messages and saw lots of hot couples.

There was one in particular that I'm going to mention now to lay the groundwork for a future episode. To this date, I still consider her to be the hottest woman I've ever seen on the Champagne site. Just incredibly sexy. So that's later. We'll get to that. But anyway, we registered and told our Indianapolis friends about it. They were interested in attending and meeting us. So we kept chatting and they got their tickets. It became evident very quickly that none of us were interested in just meeting. The intent was that this was going to be the first play date for both of us.

So we talked about rules, you know, condoms were a must, no anal uh stuff that we probably shouldn't have even been worried about but we discussed anyway because we were all newbies you know we didn't know what the hell we were doing but you know what in the end uh even uh eva and i were very glad that it worked out that way okay because we all kind all kind of learn together. So let's fast forward again to Saturday, June 6, 2020, 21. A funny thing happened that I think it only happened to us. Here we are first time swingers to be, and we want everything to be perfect.

So we groomeded ourselves extensively now that's something that hasn't changed we always groom groom extensively before a play date and you know we feel that uh you know others are letting us become intimate with them and that and that's a huge thing so we're gonna damn well do our best to look feel and smell our absolute best so eva wanted to be really smooth you know down there for the guy um now she shaves her intimate areas anyway but she wanted to make sure that there was no stubble. So she decided to try one of those hair removal creams.

Well, Eva has very sensitive skin, and it gets irritated very easily. Well, this irritated the crap out of her skin. It almost looked like it burned her skin. her bikini line area was a mess with these huge red blotches and like just spots and bumps and just from her skin reacting to the to the cream and it looked it looked terrible but she said it felt fine you, there wasn't any pain and we didn't want to cancel. And we figured, you know, it would be looking a lot better later in the evening and we would keep the lights dim anyway. So we were still in game on mood.

Now, for the record, it didn't look all that much better in the evening, but she felt no discomfort. And I did something too, something stupid. I was trimming my body downstairs using electric trimmers.

Well, I somehow forgot to put the guide back on, so I accidentally shaved a strip of body hair there was nothing i can do i wasn't going to go back i wasn't going to shave everything i wasn't going to do that and it obviously wouldn't grow back by the evening so i just had to hope that the the dim light would hide it and for the record i believe it did i i just i think i lucked out and got away with one had we played in a well-lit room it may have been very noticeable and a completely different story but it worked out for both eva and myself so we arrived at the hotel as early as we could to check in and the moment we arrived in the lot i felt kind of a weird pit in my stomach there were people playing volleyball on the grass there was a dj out by the pool there were people hanging out in swimsuits and lawn chairs and it hit me all these people all of them and all these cars in the parking lot, they all belong to swingers.

All of them are swingers, and we are now part of that lifestyle. It was a weird feeling, just excitement. It was nerves, mostly nerves.

I mean, just hours from that now um my dick was supposed to be in a woman other than my wife for the first time since i was 18 years old and there would be another guy's dick in her we were here to fuck other people this was happening everyone was uh just so great though uh we could not have asked for a better introduction to the lifestyle and again we were we were very lucky my dj partner and his wife were there and introduced us to many other people from the facebook group several people came to our room introduced themselves it was just a very welcoming atmosphere A couple of side notes here because again they will become significant in later episodes that woman i mentioned earlier the hottest woman on the champagne site we saw her and her husband exiting the elevator and i froze it was like seeing a celebrity that i love in Like when I, I met my favorite actor from Star Wars at a convention.

Yes, I am a nerd. Yes. i guess it was like it was like seeing a famous porn star in real life you know i had seen this woman naked in photos and videos that uh she and her husband posted uh i had seen her get fucked by her husband on video and, and there she was just a few feet away from me walking away. I was just like, wow, like just, just starstruck. So put that little quick story in your back pocket.

That's a little foreshadowing for a future episode one more little side story i noticed this other couple uh the girl had a bunch of tattoos and a really unique hairstyle literally half of her head was shaved bald and the other half was long and brown very attractive woman with a wild side i assumed so i was just kind of you know mesmerized so to speak I'll see you next week.

very attractive woman with a wild side i assumed so i was just kind of you know mesmerized so to speak a little a little bit later on eva and i were in the elevator and she and her man walked in and i can't remember who initiated it but we all introduced ourselves you know just a quick hi how you And, and we didn't talk to them again, the rest of the time we were there, but again, just put that story in your back pocket because that story will be significant in a future episode onto the main event. Okay. So with a hotel takeover, the party starts around 8 PM.

It really It really starts picking up around 9 p.m. And it's like slamming party around 10 or 11. So we didn't know it at the time. But this particular hotel wasn't really conducive to a hotel takeover. You know, we had nothing to compare it to. It was smaller, had a smallish ballroom where the DJ was set up. So it wasn't exactly super comfy cozy like the next hotel takeover I'll tell you about in a future episode.

So anyway, we go to the party in the ballroom around 8 o'clock because we wanted to get a table, which is a hot commodity at a takeover so uh my dj partner recommend we we got there early so eva my dj partner and his wife and some of their friends uh got in and to a table and just we hung out we talked we danced uh we were waiting on our new friends to arrive our indianapolis friends they seem to be taking forever and we wondered almost if they were even gonna if they were even gonna show up we thought maybe that we were gonna be stood up so in the meantime we danced we watched others we talked it was a lot of fun you know we noticed a lot of other attractive couples including the hottest woman I've ever seen on Champagne, foreshadowing, and the wild couple from the elevator, foreshadowing.

But still, our new friends hadn't arrived. But a little bit later on, to our pleasant surprise, we received a text, probably around 9.30 or so.

I cannot remember the times but uh they were in the lot and on their way in so we met them in the lobby as they checked in and there were lots of first impressions i thought to myself this is the guy who's gonna fuck my wife tonight this is the woman i'm going to fuck and it was about as awkward as expected you know we got along well right away but it was just you know we were not really in our comfort zone yet we were all so new at this so we took them to her room for a drink and you know had some conversation and then we eventually headed back down to the party but there were a few weird things happening mostly with her well first of all well i'll start with him first of all with him he was wearing he was wearing jeans and according to club rules that was a no-no it kind of made me feel like uh this this guy didn't even bother to read the rules is he a dumbass but that wasn't a huge deal okay um you know at we were at a hotel we weren't necessarily at the club so club rules applied but you know i don't think they were going to be very strict on enforcing them but with her now this was shortly after covid was was you know going away and she wore a mask pretty much the whole time, even in the room talking to us.

She said she was a nurse and didn't want to take any chances. But she was literally the only person in the entire hotel who was wearing a mask. Now, she took it off on occasion, but I would say it stayed on 90% of the time. And her wardrobe did not match the environment either. Even Eva, as a first-timer here at the hotel takeover, she was showing a decent amount of skin and was dressed to the takeover's tropical theme.

They had like a beach theme but not her though she wore this very dark blouse with uh with her husband's shirt over the top of it it was it was a man's shirt over the top of it it was very strange and i immediately wondered if this night was gonna go where I hoped it would go or not. Still, she was very attractive, very nice. And her husband and I, we got along great. So at midnight, the party moves upstairs to the top floor. In a small hotel like this one, though, it was terribly conceived.

It was so crowded and just not designed for this type of event, but you know, we didn't know any better. This was our first one. So we didn't know, uh, we just knew it was, it was crazy and crowded. There were designated playrooms on the top floor and we went in some of them just to explore, you know, people can, if they want, uh, people to watch, they leave their doors open. So we walked in some of the open doors and people were having sex right in front of us. So that was a new experience. Eventually, we made it back to our hotel room and we just talked. So I would say it was about 1 a.m.

at this point. So it was starting to get late. And the dude and his wife said they needed something from their car. I can't remember what, but they had to go to their car. So they went out, and that gave Eva and I a chance to touch base. We both agreed we were still a go, but nobody seemed to be making the first move. So I remember texting the dude while he was outside saying, My wife is ready to fuck you. Come back quick. And he replied in all capital letters, Coming. So we knew what was on the table. They came back and we talked more and had a few drinks. So, you know, we're all new.

It's all awkward. Nobody knew what the hell to do. I'm very thankful that the dude decided to make the first move. He said something like to Eva, he said something like, can I kiss you? And my wife said, sure.

So they started kissing in the middle of the room his wife sat on a chair in the corner and i stood between the beds so we had a bed between us she and i were both incredibly nervous but when they started kissing i i figured i should at least go sit near her as awkward as you were picturing this it was it was that awkward as whatever you're picturing so I went over and sat next to her on like I sat on the ottoman and she sat on the chair and I took her hand I held her hand and I could tell she was very nervous and she was laughing a lot like a nervous laugh and and that's when I just laid it out on the line I was very polite.

And I said something like this. I said, look, you don't have to do this. Okay. I only want to do this if you are absolutely 100% comfortable. We can walk away, no hard feelings. And she said something like, no, it's fine. I just think, you know, we're just not a good match because we're just both so shy. And she was right. You know, we both were. So I decided to speak up. I said, all right. I said, so can I kiss you? And she said, yes. So I did.

Well, my friends, that was like unlocking a cheat code in a video game because once we started kissing, both of our nervousness went right out the window and we started going at it. Clothes started coming off, both off of us and my wife and the other dude, and things progressed very quickly. She had amazing, massive boobs, like just deceptively massive. Like I couldn't believe what she was hiding under her blouse. So that was pretty awesome. But something happened that I never expected. I never anticipated, never even considered it a possibility.

I not get hard it was so strange i had been looking forward to something like this forever this was a fantasy of mine i was so excited i was so turned on how could i not get hard i had never ever had that problem before but you know you know, so many nerves, I guess, it made sense. I finally got semi-hard, you know, just enough to get a condom on and to put it inside her. I wasn't very hard, but that didn't stop my brain from telling the semen in my body that it needed to get out of there pretty quickly. So it wasn't over super fast, but I, I wish it lasted longer than it did.

And I bet she did too. Uh, meanwhile on the other bed, Eva was getting it on with the dude and looking back i wished i wish i watched them more than i did but i was so focused on my task at hand and concerned about not performing i mean i did watch just just not a lot just not not as much as i would have liked to. Watching Eva with another dude becomes more and more of a turn-on as I progress through these adventures.

Anyway, the dude didn't finish, and after his girl and I were done, she ended up walking over to the two of them while I laid there on the bed, just, you know, partly happiness, partly relief, partly surprised that I actually just did what I did, partly tired. It was kind of a mix of things. Now, I suppose this is a good time for me to stop and say that there were two major things that we learned from our first adventure. Besides that we were capable of having sex with other people. The first, we learned that Eva was bisexual. Accidentally.

This was completely by accident and a complete surprise. So So Eva didn't have a bisexual bone in her body. It never even crossed her mind until it did. The other thing we learned was reclaim sex is amazing, but I'll get to that. All right.

Let's first talk about how eva realized she was bisexual so i had just finished with the woman and she went over to where eva and her man were playing the guy asks for them to fulfill a lifelong fantasy of his which was to have two women suck his dick at the same time they happily obliged well while doing this they were obviously in close proximity to each other meaning eva and the girl so they're doing their thing with the guy and eva suddenly felt someone touching her first her legs and her boobs then her pussy first it was fingers and then after after a few moments it was even a tongue and it occurred to her that the guy was standing and could not reach where she was and it certainly wasn't me because i was over on the bed so it was the woman and she was surprised by this it was something she wasn't expecting but she was even more surprised to realize she liked it she enjoyed it a lot that was one of the those defining moments in our lives really because from that moment forward, Eva was interested in playing with women and that was the exact moment a switch was flipped i am recording this nearly three years after it happened and i honestly can't recall how exactly their playtime finished i don't think he ended up coming i think they just kind of stopped but i'd have to check with eva on that one but the bottom line is that we were done and we decided to get dressed and head back up to the fifth floor which it was pretty uneventful i mean there was you know same as before lots of people very crowded lots of open doors with people having sex.

We watched a few more, but that was about it. So our Indianapolis friends decided after some time that it was time for them to go. They actually had a babysitter that they needed to get home to and relieve. So it was about 2 o'clock, I'd say, 2.30.

I honestly can't remember the the times um we kind of walked into the stairway we we hugged we thanked each other for a fun time said we had to do it again it was that was nice to hear and then they headed out Eva and I we didn't have any desire to stay up on the fifth floor anymore so or fourth floor, I can't remember how many hotels were in that, how many floors were in that hotel, but we headed back to our room. And at this point, I half expected her to tell me that she had regrets that, that this was a bad idea.

And, uh, I would have to practically console her, but it was not like that at all.

We talked about the what we liked what we didn't like for example he had a lot of back acne that Eva found not so sexy but that stuff you you can't predict I mean unless you see pictures ahead of time of the dude's back which is not that common then you're not going to know that and the room wasn't well illuminated so I didn't get a good look at the dude's back and I also didn't get a look at the dude's dick so I asked how big it was I was just I was just curious she said it was about the same length as mine, but not as wide. And just talking about all this got us all riled up.

And we ended up having some pretty damn passionate sex right then and there. Now, this has a term in the swinger world. We call this reclaim sex. And it is so fucking hot. It is unbelievable. So having sex with my wife after she was just fucked by another guy, it just does it for me. It is just so hot. So I am reclaiming my wife, and she's not a possession. It's just, it's just a term and it's, it's just always just so damn intense. It is, it's, it's awesome. It's all I can say. So that was the second thing we learned.

So Eva was a bisexual and reclaim sex is amazing to wrap this up uh the next morning my dj partner and his wife met us in our room and asked how it went you know we were their first ever friends who had become swingers so so they were very interested in the details of the evening and and we we enjoyed telling them so so that was a lot of fun and then the drive home was also a lot of fun you know even i we we just talked about what we experienced and and what we saw and how we had fun and and you know how we expected to see that couple again and who what other couples would we be interested in seeing um but the indianapolis couple we actually never did see them again that never happened we we stayed in touch with them for a few months after uh you know always talking about how we need to get together again but you know their their schedules were super busy with their young kids but we still plan on doing it at some point.

And then suddenly, out of the blue, the dude texted me to let us know that they were getting a divorce. And looking back, Eva and I think that maybe they were trying out the lifestyle as a last-ditch effort to save their marriage. And in our opinion, that's a very bad idea, by the way.

We think that being in the lifestyle is only for couples who have a very strong marriage and where there's open lines of communication and there's just a loving relationship with each other i don't think our our swap caused the divorce but it may have been more of an attempt to save their marriage to you know to inject some some fun and life and excitement into it but it didn't work out obviously despite that we are we are forever forever grateful to them you know in a lot of ways we feel we got very lucky and and ended up having what we consider to be like the perfect first encounter you know we were all newbies you know we're all learning none of us knew what the hell we were doing and we were in a sex-charge environment with the privacy of a hotel room.

I think that if you were a new swinger, the odds of finding another couple with zero experience to have your first couple with is extremely low. Maybe I'm wrong, but that's just kind of what I think. So we got pretty lucky. It was just a fantastic first experience and it served as a springboard to the next. And that will be my next episode. So that's it for this one. Thank you for listening. I do hope you'll join me for another episode. Feel free to reach out to me with questions. You can find me on Kik and Instagram at Evan Deenson. That's E-V-A-N-D-E-A-N-S-O-N, Evan Deenson.

And I hope you'll be back to listen again. Take care, everyone.