Show notes
I have learned that going into an event with no expectations is often the best way to ensure I'll have fun. It was no exception on Valentines Day when Eva and I attended a club event, knowing full well ahead of time that we would not be playing with anyone that evening.
Transcript
the following podcast contains adult content including adult language i talk openly about sex and other adult topics if you are under the age of 18 or are uncomfortable listening to sexually explicit narratives please listen no further i am not a professional therapist counselor or doctor i'm just an average guy in the swinger lifestyle who likes to share his experiences. This podcast is for informational and entertainment purposes only. Please seek a professional if you are in need of guidance or care as it relates to sexual health or alternative lifestyles.
hello my lifestyle friends welcome to evan swings, of course, a lifestyle podcast from the perspective of a guy in the lifestyle. That's me. I'm your host, Evan. Thank you so much for tuning in today. If you're new around here, thanks for checking this out. Just remember, I am no lifestyle expert. I never claimed to be one. I do this podcast because I have enjoyed so many other lifestyle podcasts, and I've learned so much from them, that I wanted to, like, pay it forward in my own way. I just enjoy sharing my stories, adventures, and my perspective.
I've been in the lifestyle for about, well, almost five years now. It'll be, it'll be five years in June of this year. So, uh, my wife Eva and I have learned a lot in that time. By the way, we are a late, late 40s, full swap couple from the Dayton, Ohio area. Not exactly a hotbed of lifestyle activity in this area, but we have certainly overall enjoyed our time so far. And to all my returning listeners, welcome back. Thank you as always for your continued support. Special shout out to J&J in Australia. They reached out to me recently and said hello. So I wanted to say thank you for listening.
I was admittedly very delighted to hear that I have listeners on the other side of the globe in Australia. I've also been contacted by listeners in Belgium, so I guess it's official, Evan Swings has gone global. And I'm just kidding, okay? It is very humbling to hear that people from different parts of the world are, are, uh, are listening. It means a lot to me. It really does. Oh, and I received a funny comment from, uh, J and J in Australia. I was told that I sound goofy and teacher-ish, Not as an insult, of course, but when I read that, I really did laugh out loud.
And I suppose I do sound like a teacher at times when I speak because, yes, I am, in fact, a teacher. So I just found that really humorous that a listener commented about that so thank you again j and j moving on i am recording this episode in march of 2026 and what i'm about to tell you took place last month which is february of 2026 valentine's day to be specific We'll be right back. what I'm about to tell you took place last month, which is February of 2026, Valentine's Day to be specific.
As I have said numerous times here in the Dayton, Ohio area, there aren't any lifestyle clubs close by, at least none that are worth our time. None that are really classy and sexy, or I should say classy and nice. Just nice clubs. There's none of those. So Eva and I frequently drive the roughly 90 minutes to a place called Club Princeton in Columbus, Ohio. And we decided well before Valentine's Day that we wanted to spend that evening at Princeton. And there were three main takeaways that I came away with from this event. So I wanted to share them with you.
Before I go any further, I want to remind everybody that, said I'm not an expert and I can prove that if you were to see where I'm recording this from. I'm just in a home office with a basic microphone and the reason I'm telling you this now is because I'm home alone with three dogs and they're kind of energetic right now. So you may hear them, uh, shaking their, their collar, um, maybe bark, maybe chewing on something. So please forgive me if you hear that. Um, they're, they're around right now. Okay. So as I said, three takeaways, three main takeaways from that evening.
Number one, it is amazing to me how fast someone's view of another person can change so quickly. And this point was driven home during this particular visit to Princeton. And to accurately explain what I mean, I first have to paint you two pictures of two people actually. Two people who I see at this particular club fairly often. First is a woman. I call her Spider Woman because at Princeton's Halloween party two Octobers ago, she was dressed as, well, Spider Woman or Spider Girl.
And I'm not familiar with the comics, but it was a sexy, red, tight, form-fitting superhero costume that left very little to the imagination. It was very hot. She is very hot. In fact, I found her to be the most attractive woman at that club on many occasions.
And I don't know if other guys out there feel the same way, but there's always that one, you know, that one woman or one person who seems untouchable, you know, like out of your league you know that that one woman who to be with is like your ultimate lifestyle goal and I guess I shouldn't say your ultimate lifestyle goal just you know the the top tier okay like if you had to pick somebody if you had to pick somebody to be with, that would be the person you would pick. So spider woman is that woman for me.
Like if I could ever figure out a way to, to hang out with, and then ultimately have sex with her, then I would, I would feel like there's nothing, there's nothing I could not achieve in the lifestyle. I mean, this woman is drop-dead gorgeous, like supermodel gorgeous. And I have to say, it's not that I haven't tried to connect with her. Her husband is very handsome as well. You know, definitely a couple that Eva and I would like to get to know better. So at one point I liked their profile on one of the lifestyle sites I use.
And I even reached out and sent them a message at some point a while ago just to, you know, say hello and introduce ourselves. No response. I wasn't surprised or disappointed, though. You know, I know how these things work. We're not everybody's cup of tea, and she literally can have any guy she wants, and I honestly do not think I'm exaggerating. So I would just, you know, kind of, kind of admire her from afar. So that's Spider Woman. The other picture I want to paint is of a gentleman we see at the club fairly frequently.
And I have nicknamed him landfill it is it is an obscure movie reference if you've ever seen the movie beer fest from a long time ago you know who I'm talking about but we see this this guy at the club all the time and most of the most of the people we see at the club no matter what they look like no matter what it seems their background is they are always polite and respectful even if they have no interest in us whatsoever they're still kind they they will treat everyone with respect, but not this one dude. Okay. Not landfill. And Eva will back me up on this, but he is not attractive at all.
Okay. And I know every, everybody, everybody's attracted. everybody is attractive to someone. So I'll just say, he is not attractive to Eva at all. He is a, he's a heavyset man, fairly tall, with a big beard, like a big bushy beard and a receding hairline. he likes to wear button-down shirts that that he leaves open so his hairy belly is on full display okay and again some some people may like that okay but Eva does not and as a completely 100% heterosexual man I look at him him and even I think, yeah, he is just not an attractive guy. And we're just talking about his physical appearance here.
His personality is, for lack of a better term, dickish. Okay.
Now, and thankfully we have only had one uh direct interaction with him one time we we walked by and he took it uh took a look at eva's exposed chest and said oh i'd like a piece of that you know flirtatious comments are fine they don't bother us but But the way he said it was just dickish I mean that that's the word I'm using dickish so that was the only thing he ever actually said to either of us and we both just smiled and just kept walking but we have seen him and heard him we have heard him interact with other people and he thinks very highly of himself and he doesn't seem to stop talking every time we see him he is blabbing loudly and the club is loud okay loud you know with music and all the other conversations happening, but he seems to make his voice heard.
And we have never seen a, like a specific woman that is always with him. So I'm not sure what his deal is. we always go to the club on Saturdays where single guys are not allowed unless they are guests of another couple, so maybe that's how he gets in, but I'm not sure.
But have you ever met someone or even just seen someone and you just know right away that you just really don't like them well that's the impression i get from this guy that's the feeling i get i see him as an arrogant blowhard now why am i painting you these pictures of spider woman and landfill because at this valentine's day party we noticed at one point two people making out on one of the the couches by the dance floor she was sitting on his lap and he was rubbing her, and she was kind of grinding on him. It was Spider-Woman and Landfill. My view of Spider-Woman instantly changed.
Not that I knew her, but I instantly, like, I felt like I lost a ton of respect for her. I mean, she could have any guy she wants. And she picks the biggest asshole at the club? It almost turned my stomach to see. But now, I don't hold Spider-Woman in such high regard anymore. I suddenly don't find her as attractive. Just because of what I witnessed, I don't really consider her like my top fantasy woman, like my ultimate prize. I'm having a hard time finding the words here, but I just don't, I just don't see her as attractive as I once did.
And reflecting on that incident, I even surprised myself how someone I found so, so attractive quickly became a lot more unattractive based on who she decided to associate with. Is this normal? Has something similar happened to anyone else out there? Like a complete reversal of attraction? I don't know. It was just an interesting thing. And I'm just not sure if it's fairly normal for that to happen. So that was the first takeaway from Valentine's Day. The second, the significance of having a table at the club, like having a place to sit and set down your things.
Back when Eva and I first got into the lifestyle, you may remember from my very earliest episodes that my former DJ partner and his wife, who were in the lifestyle themselves, were invaluable to us. They offered us guidance as we tried to navigate the lifestyle for the first time. You know, we learned a lot from them and are just forever grateful. We feel it was a huge advantage to have friends who had been in the lifestyle to kind of help us along.
Well, one of the things they told us at our very first ever lifestyle experience, which was a hotel takeover in Indianapolis, was that they strongly preferred having a table or a or a place where they could sit and set down drinks at these events. After a few times going to the club and events we quickly came to realize that we wholeheartedly agreed with them. It is so nice to have what I call a home base at clubs and events. It is less of a big deal at hotel takeovers, because you can always go back to your room, and there always seems to be an abundance of places to sit.
But at Club Princeton, it is different. And this admittedly may not be the case at other clubs, but I'm going to tell you at club Princeton, there are, uh, there is very limited seating, very limited. If you don't reserve a table, depending on how crowded it is, you may find yourself unable to find a place to sit the entire evening. Even just for a few moments. Now, Eva and I are 49 years old. I have a bad knee, multiple orthopedic issues with my legs, and we like to dance. So to us, it is important to have a place that we can go back to whenever we'd like and take a load off.
We like to have a guaranteed place to sit. And at Princeton, you have to reserve tables when you purchase tickets for an extra fee. And if you are not fast enough, tables will be sold out and then you're out of luck. Well, Valentine's Day, I got lucky. I didn't buy our tickets fast enough and all the tables were sold out. But we still really wanted to go. So I bit the bullet and bought tickets anyway. Then I just happened to check back on the club's website a week later and a small two-person table was available.
So I snapped it up and it turned out to be more of a boon than I could have ever imagined. This table was small. I would say maybe two feet in diameter. But our table turned out to be a big hangout spot. We had two couples who are friends of ours hang out with us there for a good portion of the evening. Another couple who we just met decided to hang with us as well. And if you remember Judy from episode 64, she was there with her husband too. So we had five couples sharing this tiny table. And I wish I took a photo of it because to accommodate the drinks of 10 people, the table was covered.
Like you could hardly see any table surface at all. It was all cups and a big bucket of ice. But it gave everyone a home base. It acted as a group, like a group congregation area. It was a place where we could all socialize and set down our drinks. It was a place where people could grab a chair and take a load off for a while. And I know, you know, granted this involved a lot of rotation because there were only two chairs, but there were tables around us that had chairs. And when people weren't sitting there, we just kind of grabbed those. And it was incredibly nice to have.
Plus, it gave us a chance to meet a few other people because online, I was able to comment on the Princeton site. I commented where some people posted pics, like they posted their picks. And I said something like, uh, come and say hello at table 14. Cause they, you know, they, with their pick, they would say we're, we're coming, coming to Princeton tonight. We'd love to, uh, meet some people. So I would say, come and say hello at table 14.
And that is much easier than saying something like, hopefully we'll see you at some point walking around you know maybe we'll bump into each other having a table allowed us to announce where we would be and if these couples wanted to come and say hello they could and one couple did and they were very nice. It was nice to meet them. So my second big takeaway here is that having a table is even more significant than I originally thought. It's a place to rest your feet, a place to meet others, a place to set down your drinks, and where everybody can just kind of hang.
To Eva and I, like I said, a table has become I'll see you next time. to set down your drinks and where everybody can just kind of hang. To Eva and I, like I said, a table has become almost a necessity if we are going to the club. If one is not available to reserve, we almost feel like we aren't as inclined to even go. But again, considering how nice it was for everyone to get together in the same location, it made me realize just how important I find having a table to be. And granted, all people are different, okay? Some of our friends feel the exact opposite.
They refuse to pay extra for a table. And they go to the club and have an amazing time every time. They don't care that they don't have a set place to sit or a place to set down their drinks whenever they want. And part of it is because they are way more social than us. They'll walk around and they'll talk to anyone and everyone. So it all depends on the type of couple you are. But for us, reserving a table has proven to make our club experience 10 times better.
And finally, takeaway number three, going into this particular evening, Eva and I knew that we weren't going to, I'll just say, we weren't going to fuck anyone. Mother Nature reared her head for Eva. And I know some women use those discs or whatever they're called, which, you know, allow them to play without worry. But Eva is not one of those women. So we went into this evening knowing that we were not going to end up in bed with anyone. And you know what, my friends? Do you know what happened? I literally had the best time I have ever had at the club.
And from an outside perspective, that may sound strange. I went to a sex club, didn't have any sex at all, and still walked out of there thinking that it was the most fun I have ever had at that club. And that is the absolute truth. I am not exaggerating at all. That evening was the most Thank you.
was the most fun I have ever had at that club and that is the absolute truth I am not exaggerating exaggerating at all that evening was the most fun I've ever had why well let me let me start with this I felt like the man all right now I have I've I've railed on and on before I've gone on and on about how I am not the most self-confident guy in the world. But this night, my confidence was at an all time high.
A big part of it was what I just mentioned about having a reserved table, because we had that we had we had five different couples all hanging out with us you know we're all hanging out talking laughing and flirting all around our table and our my dogs are going crazy at the moment i had to pause the recording there and let them out my goodness goodness. Anyway, so I just felt like Mr. Popular. Okay. People were enjoying my company and I was enjoying theirs. There was another couple there that, that, um, they sat by themselves and didn't, didn't seem to talk to anyone.
And at one point, Judy and I went over to say hello to them and talk to them for a bit, you know, tried to make them feel welcome and, you know, invited them to join us by our table, but they chose not to. And that's totally fine.
And we have seen other couples on several occasions that, that come to the club and, you know, just stay off to the side or at their table just kind of people watch not really talking to anyone and sometimes I feel bad for them because Eva and I have been in that situation before you know the club is a social environment and to not, to not be, um, social significantly affects the evening's, um, the evening's enjoyment level, like, you know, like how much you enjoy your evening.
So, you know, and that's just me, you know, these people who kind of sat by themselves and just kind of did their thing. That's, that's fine. And they may have really enjoyed that. But for Eva and myself, you know, we see it as a social situation and we really like to be social. So I have to say, it felt wonderful to, you know, always have people to talk to, to laugh with, to flirt with, to dance with. It was just, it was just so much fun and admittedly a big boost for, for my self-confidence. And what else?
Um, I was able to dance with, um, like four different women, four different attractive women. That was a lot of fun for sure. And I'm not the best dancer, but at a club like that, you don't have to be, you just stand and move your hips and, and caress the woman you are with. Hold her close, maybe talk to her, and yeah, that's it. Easy as pie. And the music the club played that night was awesome. It was such a great mix. For the first time ever, I actually danced to Let's Get It On by Marvin Gaye.
I've always loved that song, but, but I never thought of it as, you know, something you could really dance to. It was just kind of a, a sexy song. Well, I did that night with Judy and it was a lot of fun. Plus that evening we made some new friends and we didn't know how they wound up at our table and they just, you know, suddenly were there and were like talking to us and I honestly don't know. We have no idea where they came from, but they were really nice and attractive and a lot of fun. We ended up getting their contact information and have been chatting with them a lot.
So as it turns out, we will be seeing them tomorrow night when we return to Club Princeton. What else for that evening? The lap dance, Judy gave me a lap dance. I got to watch Eva make out with a couple of different guys and give oral to another woman right by our table um i made out with a couple of lovely ladies and uh and plus okay and plus we arrived at the club in a Mustang convertible. I felt like the man, okay? I was in an accident in January.
I'm not sure if I mentioned that on a previous episode, but I got rear-ended, totaled my truck, long story, but Enterprise was out of full-size sedans. So they gave me a Ford Mustang, a Ford Mustang convertible. And it was hands down the most fun car I have ever driven. I felt, I felt like I was riding in high style when we got to the club. Um, and there may have been other stuff to that evening, but, but all that made it to be such a fun time.
So my big takeaway from that So, let takeaway from that and something I feel people new to the lifestyle might enjoy hearing a sex club is not all about the sex. I had the absolute best time and sex was never even on the plate for the evening, never even on my plate, never even a consideration. The atmosphere, the music and dancing and the good company made it the best experience I've ever had there. i've talked about this topic before but it is my advice that when you attend a club or event like a lifestyle club or event, go in with no expectations.
There are people out there who have posted on Facebook and Reddit about how it's their goal to have sex at the club. Like they will post, hey, who wants to play with us tonight? Or hey, we're going to the club. Who wants a piece of this? Something like that. And plenty of others have responded that this way of thinking is not the best way to go about it. go there go into it without that expectation. Instead, think of it this way. You are going out with your significant other to be with your significant other and enjoy the atmosphere. Enjoy the environment. If you meet people there, great.
That is a bonus. If you end up having sex with them, great. That's a bonus. But just enjoy your time being out with like-minded people in a judgment-free environment. Many people say that, and I agree with it. Just because you go to a sex club doesn't mean that if you don't hook up with anyone, that the night is a failure. Drink, dance, talk, have a good time there. Enjoy the scenery for goodness sake. Every time we have gone to a club or event, people watching, people watching, like, I didn't say that right, people watching has been a highly enjoyable activity.
You know, check out the hotties that are there. Check out the costumes. Check out the wardrobe choices. If nothing else, they're conversation material for you and your partner. And again, if you are lucky enough to meet some cool people there, it's a win. It's a bonus. And if things progress to, you know, to play, to play time, that's just another bonus. So my experience is proof that having sex is not a necessity for a good time at a club. Just go out and have a good time. Enjoy the environment. And with that, I'm going to sign off on this episode.
I hope you enjoyed listening today, and I hope, I hope you'll come back another time for another episode. Remember, if you have questions, comments, thoughts, suggestions for future episodes, or you just want to say hello, there are several ways you can reach me. The newest way is by finding this podcast's profile on swing.com. And I think SLS. I think they're kind of the same thing right now. So you simply go to the podcast section or search for Evan Swings podcast. You can use the messaging feature there to reach me.
You can also find me on the Blue Sky app by searching for Evan Swings or find me on Kik or Instagram at Evan Deansson. That is my handle, Evan e-v-a-n d-e-a-n s-o-n finally email you can send a message via email by using my gmail address evan deanson at gmail.com i love hearing from listeners so feel free to shoot me a message anytime. Please just be patient because I don't check all those platforms daily. There's so many different platforms now. I may have to consolidate at some point. As for now, though, thank you again for joining me here on Evan Swings.
I hope to have you back again sometime. Until then, as I always say, be safe, be adventurous, and we only get one. So remember, always live life to the fullest. Take care, everybody.
