marnmar1 - Sometimes I think that people forget you can see when they last logged in. Being that they are logging in like that, it probably rules out them having an emergency. I am like you in that I try to by upfront, in as nice a way as possible, and also respect people's time.
A lot of good points made here, and I certainly understand something traumatic could've happened that is taking up their time and energy not leaving room for lifestyle stuff. Having said that, as we can still see their profile, they log on here just about every day. So I'm not leaning toward something catastrophic. We've been doing this a long time now and I get that couples can be really difficult. I suppose I'm just wishing everyone was more like me lol. I am very straightforward and outspoken. While I honestly would never hurt someones feelings on purpose, I cant count the times in the last 13 years I've had to say, " sorry, we just not a good match" or something to that effect. I'm suppose I'm just wanting the same honesty in return
It could have nothing to do with you, something to do with you, or everything to do with you. It doesn't really matter, except that humans don't like permanent suspense very much.
A number of years ago, a former partner and I met a couple via SLS. We had dinner together and there was definitely chemistry, so we planned a hotel date (we all had kids living at home). That went beautifully and then we vanished, never again checking that account, not even to leave them a cert or thank them. It had nothing to do with them, though.
Instead, the morning after the date, I got word that my mother had been diagnosed as terminal, wanted to go into home hospice, and I was needed to help with that. I didn't think about them or SLS again until 19 months later.
Ditto on there not being a "soft block", at least that I'm aware of. As for the phone block, does it just go right to voicemail or do you get some sort of message that you're blocked? Just wondering if something unexpectedly bad happened on their end and they just can't deal with LS stuff right now.
Otherwise, could be a jealousy thing, as mentioned earlier. That would definitely put a halt to things quickly like that, but that's just speculating.
Other than that, I've not really seen a big increase in ghosting, but we mainly rely on in person meetings at local LS parties, so we're probably not a good gauge of online meeting trends.
We can still their profile but can't message them so we are somehow at least soft blocked on here.
I assume you intended to write "We can still see their profile...". I don't think this site has a "soft-block" functionality - it's either blocked or not blocked. So if you can see their profile, I think you should be able to see your old message exchange with them and be able to send them a message as well. If you cannot, and can see their profile, I would contact customer "service" - see the Help section.
I would be willing to bet one of the couple got jealous and they cut it off with you.
Not sure if there has been an increase in Ghosting. It's always a problem with swing sites. There are wannabees, fakes, pic pervs, etc. who get their jollies that way. We've always had a good screening process to weed them out fairly quickly.
It seems we get ghosted constantly now. In the matter of four days, we were ghosted by 1 single woman who contacted us, 1 hot wife who contacted us and couple we had hung out with twice where we thought everything went wonderfully.
The single girl ended up chatting for a day and a half with my wife. They got into some really personal and deep conversation. They had planned on us all meeting up on Saturday afternoon, but suddenly she had plans with a friend. Then, we were supposed to meet up for lunch on Sunday but she said she was sick, allergies. Haven't heard a word from her since. The hot wife was in town visiting her mom, supposedly. She reached out to us and I responded. After some pleasant chat, I gave her my wife's phone number and they began chatting. Chatted pretty much all day. This was on a Friday. For the rest of the weekend she ducked and dodged meeting up, always having an excuse like family unexpectedly showed up or whatever and then POOF, disappeared like a fart in the wind. The couple surprised us more than anything. We met the first time at Hooters and from the initial handshake it was if we had known them for years! The conversation was good, the laughter was genuine. There were none of the awkward silences trying to come up with something to say. It seemed the four of us got along beautifully. We texted in group messages all the next week and made plans to meet up the following Saturday evening. We met for dinner and drinks and then retired to a hotel room where things went extremely well, at least from our perspective. We received texts after parting where they said if they never met anyone else in the lifestyle other than us they were fine with it. Repeatedly remarked on what a great time they had and couldn't wait to see us again. We made plans for the following Saturday, but on Friday night they said they couldn't make it because of his work schedule. That was fine, we understand life happens. But then they blocked us! Phone numbers, blocked. We can still their profile but can't message them so we are somehow at least soft blocked on here. No explanation, we have no idea what we did or what happened. Just blocked us.
Is anyone else seeing a rash of this behavior? We aren't the type to ghost someone. If we aren't a match or we aren't feeling it for some reason, we just tell you. Nothing personal and not trying to hurt anyones feelings, but we are pretty open and honest people. What's the point in all the messaging if you have no intentions of following through? Damn, are people that lonely and in need of a hobby?
