what if u know someone has an std

And for the OP: If I contracted an STD from someone who knew they had it and a friend knew and didn't make me aware, I would make them both accountable.

We are very selective, we think we make good decisions, we try to protect ourselves but there's the wildcard: a monster who would willingly infect others, perhaps ruin lives, so that they get pleasure the way they want it. And the mindset of "everybody has one and most can be cured with a pill" is lunacy. Trying to convince others to agree is even worse.

Moe: "If any of the readers have fucked only six people in the lifestyle, they they fucked at least one person who had HSV-2 (Yes, genital Herpes), and two people who have HPV."

Uhmmm, in a word, no. You've made a conclusive statement based on a subjective set of data. This is why I blocked EA when he went on a tirade about condoms being completely useless in preventing STD's. I don't have time for that.

If none of the people you fucked had an STD then you don't get one. It doesn't matter if it was 6 or 60, it still works the same way. If you fucked 3 people without using condoms and all 3 had an STD then you probably got 3 STD's. If you used condoms correctly every time you might not have contracted an STD at all, depending on the contact, general health and most importantly - what STD they have.

“ Back to personal attacks again Allen? Been skipping school? ”

Actually Professor Moe, you are attacking me, how ironic.

On the other hand, Moe, I’ll let you in on a clue since you obviously have nil; it’s exactly what the guy said in earlier posts before I blocked him for that stupid shit, so educate yourself with who said what without coming off as a clueless fuck.

~Allen

Back to personal attacks again Allen? Been skipping school? In the spirit of trying to rescue this thread from sinking any lower, just mull on the following statements:

1) The entire source of the disagreement is about the stigma of STDs. That is all. You would not have this discussion if you were talking about bronchitis, tuberculosis, or any other infectious disease. You are not shamed to discuss those with your doctor, but you are ashamed to talk about syphilis.

2) Your doctor (or any educated person) knows that most STDs are treatable just like TB. take some pills for a few days, refrain some contact with others, and you are good to go. Yet, we don't see long threads and disagreements about sex and Pink Eye for example. I don't want to get Pink Eye from someone any more than I want to get gonorrhea from them. The difference is again, the stigma.

3) Go google up oral herpes statistics and you will see over 80% of population has it, and 1/6 of the population has genital herpes. These are undeniable facts, just like earth is round, and Iraq's weapons of mass destruction were only in Bush's imagination!

Given the above statistics, every swinger you meet (eatme included), is highly likely to have mouth Herpes and possibly Genital Herpes. Just remain factual and accept the risks or quit swinging altogether!

No worries, Erotic Amazon has written the book on std transmittal, confirmed everyone has herpes and only if it drips do you get tested, so you’re good to go.

:thumbs up:

~Allen

Yikes. If you know they have 1 std, and they do it all the time. They probably have more. They could have HIV.

@Rustic

""Everyone has an STD so why bother being concerned.""

I have never ever stated that.

You keep attributing that to me. I am not sure why, but that has never been my statement. I haven't even stated anything near that.

I have stated that there is a stigma over some STDs and that you are more apt to get a cold from someone than an STD. I have stated that there is a stigma with some STDs and that the cure is very simple and painless. I have stated that there are risks in sex and risks in life and we all judge the risk level we are comfortable with. I have also stated that condoms have negligible impact on the prevention of anything other than HIV. I have also stated that people should do what they feel comfortable with.

I have pointed out that the porn industry tests for four stds. This is the same panel that if you went to the doctor to get STD testing they would do. If you want more than the four panel, you will have to ask for it. It is not the standard procedure. What four do the porn industry test for? Chlamydia, Gono, Syph, HIv. Now, there is a push to test for a few more and PASS is doing it already. They will test for Hep C and Tric. Notice they are not testing for HPV and HSV. They, being the porn industry, have stated that testing for HPV and HSV is stupid because . . . everybody probably has it or will get it.

I have pointed out that the Porn Industry does have a vested interest in being able to stay in business. They are the 'lab' to watch to see what works and doesn't. Notice the number of HIV cases in the porn industry? We were with Randy West when Marc Wallice was found out to be HIV positive. Since that time in 1998, have there even been 50 HIV porn cases?

While by no means do I think you are ignorant, I think you are reading things that I never wrote. If you read what I wrote, you will not find what you purport I have written.

eroticamazon no you keep saying "Everyone has an STD so why bother being concerned." You have compared someone with a STD to someone with a cold. Not everyone has an STD and while some are able to be cured others are not and are life threatening. You downplay the dangers in every post you make. One can only assume it is because as others have suggested you have an STD and do not wear condoms and don't care who you infect because the CDC says "Everyone has one." which is not exactly what they say. They say chances and even the numbers they put out (which you refuted) show there is a larger number of people without an STD than with.

@Rustic

And you keep believing in Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny and various other fictional stuff.

I am sorry that studies by professionals intimidate you. I forgot, your credentials for being a subject matter expert is what . . . stayed at a Holiday Inn Express?

But I have never professed to be the subject matter expert like you have. I have only stated that people should READ and not listen to marketers.

eroticamazonyou keep on copy and paste and one day someone might just follow you up and think you actually know something.

You’re still vague. What std do they have? Why is their partner so irresponsible that they don’t get tested?

What kind of scum do you play with?

Honestly, if someone told you they have an std and you haven’t made that info known to their partner you’re just as culpable.

They will infect others in your area which will infect people you play with., which will infect you.

In short, you likely have the std already. Go get tested.

~rabbit ~

@Rustic
"moekathy 1/3 or one out of three and 1/6 or one out of six is not everyone as has been claimed. It is a large number of people but to give it perspective two out of three do not and 5 out of six do not. In other words using the numbers you provide a greater number of people do not have the diseases you quoted numbers for than do. That is far from everyone."

I think the issue that we are having in this concept is that you are thinking at a point in time. In other words, you are taking a snapshot of this instance and saying those numbers. I think you misunderstood when I stated that the CDC states over your lifetime . . . "HPV infections are so common that nearly all men and women will get at least one type of HPV at some point in their lives."

The CDC also states those numbers are 14 to 49 for HSV. I have not been able to quickly find the data for us dang old people :)

we know that one of them has an STD because they told us directly. The other half has not been tested. We have not slandered their names because we haven't told anyone. I just wanted opinions on this subject. Personally if u know you have an STD and are not being upfront with your partners before hand you are a POS. No matter what the STD is. We have discontinued our friendship w these ppl.

I really don't see a problem. EA did not try to convince anyone to bareback. He stated a case, and he left the choice to the reader. I don't think you will find anyone who claims condoms are useless, but you also won't find anyone with accurate data on their effectiveness. They simply are a good idea if you are risk averse. Their impact is probably more psychological than physical. They make you feel good that you took some steps towards protection and risk mitigation. This is why the medical circles use the word "reduce" instead of "prevent" when it comes to condoms. You will never see any claims of the percentage.

There is a bias against barebackers. Some folks think they help perpetuate STDs. I have not seen proof to that. In the past 8 years, we saw lots of "condom" folks break that rule occasionally, and sometimes frequently so proliferation of condom use is not the only reason for STD reduction. Many other factors contribute.

Like EA, I say do whatever you like, and to each his own.

moekathy 1/3 or one out of three and 1/6 or one out of six is not everyone as has been claimed. It is a large number of people but to give it perspective two out of three do not and 5 out of six do not. In other words using the numbers you provide a greater number of people do not have the diseases you quoted numbers for than do. That is far from everyone.

You are right in saying everyone has to make their own decision and can choose to do whatever they feel is right. The problem arises when people try to convince others they should not worry because everyone already has these things when in fact everyone does not. Even worse is when they say chances are you have already been exposed so at this point what does it matter. It honestly says a lot about a potential partner when they subscribe to that theory. It is not far from the truth to say an active multiple partner sexual lifestyle increases chance of exposure and risk of infection however that also means you must be careful and take precautions. For some that simply means bareback and take their chances with anyone for others it means a full body hazmat suit and test results where the ink is not quite dry. Most however fall somewhere in-between because they are informed and choose to lesson the risks while still getting the reward.

EA continues to be correct on the facts, a third of the population has HPV per the CDC. A sixth of the population has HSV-2.

These are facts from the CDC and I am having trouble understanding what authority would anyone on his forum have to dispute them. Yet there is no shortage of attackers and fact refuters.

If any of the readers have fucked only six people in the lifestyle, they they fucked at least one person who had HSV-2 (Yes, genital Herpes), and two people who have HPV. I am willing to bet if they knew that, they would not have done it. Out of a thousand profiles on SLS, how many confess to having HSV-2? Certainly not 200 people. In the past 10 years, I only saw two profiles fess up to HSV-2 out of probably two thousands. The numbers don't add up.

So is the CDC lying? Of course not. Are people hiding it? Quite possible. Or could be unaware they have it because they wore condoms so everything is fine, and there no need to test or check.

There is a lot of hype and "scariness" over the STD subject, and the silly notion that after you ate some pussy, swallowed some cum, kissed several people, rubbed genitals together, and used toys interchangeably, you are going to put a condom on and all will be okay, is simply unrealistic. In just about every encounter we had, some form of oral sex has taken place. What was the protection plan for that?

Everyone has a different play style, and nobody has the right to attack others because they don't conform to their version of "safe" sex. Each of us decides the level of protection they are comfortable with, and let's not force it upon the rest!

I will also add . . .

I talked about HIV, HPV, BV, Gono, Syph, HSV. I left out Chlamydia. So how is this narrow?

While you would never play with me, that's fine, I'd never ask.

I sincerely think you are reading into what I write what you want to believe. I am not sure what your agenda is. I am fairly confident I know your bias. So that we are completely clear, I will state my agenda.

I want people to not be afraid to have sex with others. I want people to make informed decisions from sources that are not marketers. I want people to find a comfort level that they are happy with and then have fun. I do not want people to be misled into believing that if you wear a condom that you can not get anything. I am vehemently against the concept of wearing a condom equals no chance of getting an STD and for that, I will stand on a soap box and scream that people are being misled if they believe that.

No where have I told people to not use condoms. No where have I told people to use condoms. Same with dental dams. Same with female condoms. Same with . . . well, hopefully you get it. I have stayed true and pushed people to learn more from trusted scientists instead of from Church and Dwight, or me, or even you. I have hoped that people will take what I write and question it. I have hoped that it will send them on a journey to educate themselves. I have confidence that people are smart enough to make a decision that they feel comfortable about. Only when they preach to me that by wearing a condom will they be protected.

Straying from the topic a little bit, this should give you some insight into how others think. A few years ago we went to a very large event. We are forthright and tell people our play preference well before anything is to happen. We explain that we can and do play separately. We explain that we do not use condoms. We explain that both of us are fixed. Other than getting people to sign a contract acknowledging what we disclosed, they state that they understand. If they decide to go further, then they know the expectations. During this event, I found a lovely woman and we decided to go up to my room for some fun. My wife stayed downstairs. Well during the time, she found a guy who was with a couple we had talked to the night before. Heck, we even got naked together, but no sex. So they were well aware of everything. My wife and the guy went and they had sex. He did not use a condom. About a week later he got in touch with her. His comment . . . "Well, I just got the results back from getting tested after being with you and I am clean." I felt offended. Was it that he was just horny and felt, "Damn the results, fuck her, she may have all the cooties in the world?" I felt he was implying that my wife was full of cooties. My wife is not as quick witted as I am because if I were her I would have said, "Good, I am glad. You just saved me $150 because after you fucked me, I thought I may have made a mistake and that you were an IV drug user that had HIV, Hep and HSV." Needless to say, we have never talked to them again, nor will we.

So if you feel I am being authoritative, I think you are reading into it what you want to. If you feel I am belittling those that choose to wear condoms, I think you are reading into it what you want to. My agenda is above.

eroticamazon the problem is your narrow focus on STDs. Basically you focus on HPV and to some extend HSV. You have made the claim everyone has it in regards to both. That simply is not true. They are also not the only STDs to concern yourself with. Simply put you are a prime example of a person we would refuse to play with even with protection. I'm sure many others would agree. Basically you state "Everyone has this or that STD so why should anyone worry about getting an STD because you already have it?" Not true, not factual, and in no way shape or form is responsible.

Figured as much.

Reading is important. I guess you skipped the whole section where I have stated over and over to discount what I have written and to go to the CDC site and read and make an educated decision.

However, you may be entitled to your own beliefs, you are not entitled to your own dictionary. As I stated, I was man enough to admit the mistake. I didn't think you would.

Is it the grey area of it not being exact and not having a percentage number to the 5 decimal level that made it inaccurate in your eyes? I mean, they do say that a majority of people do or will have HPV during their lifetime. Chances are that I have it or have had it or will get it. Same with you.

because, the fact that what the CDC states aligns with what said

eroticamazon your Google Fu and copy and paste game is strong yet when you claim things on your own perhaps even thinking you have drawn educated conclusions from what you read (at least the parts you did read) you fall short. You or anyone else should not be making claims based on what you read like it is fact. It is up to each and every person to do the research and make their own decisions. I am not calling into question what you copy and paste even though some of it is selective but I am calling out when you make a statement as if it were fact and it is only your opinion. You did indeed say something that was your opinion as if it were fact then found out how wrong you were. That calls into question everything that in your opinion is a fact.

Regardless all you have said regarding the original question by the OP is something about having a cold and relating that to a potentially life threatening STD or at least ones that can have long lasting effects. In fact some curable STDs can be very bad if left untreated. I have never known anyone with a cold to have more than a week or so of not feeling well then recover. Now if you had said flu or something else with the same potential as some STDs it would have made much more sense. Your ramblings seem to be that of someone who is downplaying the dangers that exist in the lifestyle. I will leave speculation as to why up to others. The facts are: STDs are out there, not everyone has one, and keeping yourself as safe as you can from them is a good thing. That includes addressing the fact that someone in the lifestyle with most likely the same circle of friends as you has one. Now it is not the OP's place to out the known (or in reality suspected unless they have seen test results) carrier but they do need to be mindful of avoiding sexual contact with those who have potentially been infected.

One more thing for you Rustic.

This is straight from the CDC site and the first sentence is BOLDED on their site.

HPV infections are so common that nearly all men and women will get at least one type of HPV at some point in their lives. Nearly 80 million Americans are currently infected with some type of HPV. About 14 million Americans, including teens, become infected each year.

@Rustic

I was man enough to admit the mistake on the cure for BV. Are you 'man' enough to admit the CDC stats on HPV and HSV?

The CDC study shows that over 50% have HPV during studies from 2011-2014. This includes oral+genital.

The CDC studies regarding HSV show a decline to now it being ~60%, down from ~79%.

But again as I have stated, discount EVERYTHING I say, Call me an asshole, idiot, moron, uneducated, etc. Whatever it takes people to go to the CDC/NIH/NHS and READ and then make their own judgement on what their comfort level is. Being told by a marketer something is much different than being told by scientists. Their agendas are much different.

I’m guessing the op will never come back. However, their very question seems awfully “grade schoolish”.

As has been asked, which STD?

How do you know one of them has an std? Did they tell you? Did someone else tell you? Did you catch it?

Why does only one of them have the std?

Have you talked to the person that has the std about it?

Do you have absolute proof or are you just slandering them? Btw, if you go around telling people they have an std and you are wrong about it they can sue you.

Too many unanswered questions

~rabbit ~

I think some very good Information was traded, and some maybe somewhat off track, and overall it was pretty enlightening. Most of us aren't exactly stupid and we can read it pretty well. If not, let's just come back here and ask.

SLO