One because both of us had to put up will all sorts of negative issues, vibes, etc while working.. We have made a pact.. and we now rid ourselves of anyone and anything that brings those negative vibes to our inner circle.
This includes friends, FWB, and even relatives.. we are now in a place we don't have to be around such negative, destructive behavior!
As kids we all have done or said thing that have hurt others. The important thing is that we don't as we grow older. Too much of that crap going on now in our society.
@VA-thank you for your willingness to share a vulnerable side of yourself to us. I suspect we all have experienced times in our lives where we realized that we might not have lived honorably and shown respect to all mankind. I can remember when I harmed someone and I came face to face to them in the grocery store and they told me that they forgive me. I did not feel like I deserved it and it cut deeply to my core
Sir VA,
In the Flatliners movie, you are referencing Kevin Bacon's character... Great movie.
In regards to the "flat face" incident, I can relate. I had something come back to me a few weeks ago, that happened twenty four years ago. I was able to make amends, even though the other party freely admitted guilt. If you wish to hear about it, shoot me a message.
So this is kind of a big brain dump. Doesn't cleanly fall into any other thread but doesn't justify a new one. It's going to be huge, so bear with me. For the purposes of this post, "Asian" or "Chinese" girl refers to the girl I met last night. "Korean" refers to the kid i knew many years about.
We are at Desire RM right now. Last night we met a mixed couple - he is Latino and she is a very cute Asian girl.
I talked to her for a bit and was simply curious about her, because she's obviously Asian but no discernable foreign accent. She mentioned that she was born in China but her parents brought her here at a young age. She has a very "Chinese" name which I obviously won't share here.
The conversation was casual but quickly turned into a discussion of ethnic situations, if that makes sense. I mentioned how there was only one "Chinese" kid in my whole school. I said her name, and we briefly both chuckled about how the name is actually Korean, not Chinese (which I learned long ago, but not when not what I'm describing below happened).
I mentioned about how this Korean girl was treated badly, and the Asian girl I said she was called "flat face-"
HOLY SHIT
I did that. I - some asshole kid who said something nobody deserves - called that Korean girl that when I was maybe 8. I had forgotten it, but now remember it like she was standing in front of me now. I know exactly where it happened, everything from trees to soccer goals. I remember the look on her face like it happened this morning.
This came back to me so fast it hit me like a ton of bricks. For about 5 seconds I began fucking bawling - right there in a hot tub in Cancun with 100 other people. I had barely ever experienced such a rush (an unpleasant one) of an emotional response.
I told her that I remember that, and that I hope that girl doesn't. That was probably a stupid thing to say. The Korean girl might not remember me specifically. I don't know.
I was suddenly reminded of the movie Flatliners. If you've not seen it, it is about medical students who endeavor to induce (relatively) safe near-death experiences. In doing so, they become confronted with some bad memories. One involves a white male character recalling his having cruelly taunted and bullied a black girl as a maybe 9 year old. He is extremely upset about this revelation, and gets this idea that he will find her and apologize.
He does find her. He attempts to apologize and is absolutely rejected. She challenges why he is there and asks what he hopes will come of it - HER healing, or the assuagement of his own guilt? He realizes that he's there for himself, not for her. The Chinese girl (maybe 35 and probably not familiar with the film) had not heard of the movie and began to seem disinterested in talking about it further.
It got me wondering. I had bullies as a kid. I always believed they never thought about me, and their ultimate flex was to inflict a lifetime of bad memories on me while carrying on guilt-free like nothing ever happened.
It seems like her and her dude have since gone home. I wished I'd had a chance to tell her the following- nothing to do with how hot she was.
1 - I'm both sorry for dumping such an unsexy thing on her at a fucking sex club.
2 - Thank you for listening.
3 - Those bullies we talked about. Maybe at least some really do experience guilt all these years later.
I don't know.
Disorderlies was an awesome movie!
Loved the Fat Boys and the movie.
In about 5th or 6th grade I had a pair of Adidas, the canvas ones, leather shoes cost a grip in the early 80s. That's why I never had a pair of Jordans.
The Fat Boys had more hits on condensed on their first couple of albums. Run DMC was just more marketable and had more longevity. Both groups are Rick n Roll Hall of Famers. I still prefer the FBs over RUN and them.
8, there was a great philisophical cinematic masterpiece made about that subject done by musical geniuses The Fat Boys called Disorderlies. Were you wearing RunDMC's or Jordans when you saw the movie back in the day?
Don't forget the medications that we take. Back in the day, only the sick or elderly ppl had a counter full of daily pills. Now over-weight pre-K kids and grade schoolers are coming to school with their meds and allergy lists.
What happens to our digestive systems, liver, kidneys, heart and everything else if we take pills for 10, 20, 30+ years?
Lots of meds cause blurry vision, dizziness and other side effects. The choice will be, do you want blurry vision and a runny nose, or a runny asshole?
Not the case in Asia and Europe. And not til recently, has Asia dealt with the diabetes issue like here in the U.S.
Upon consulting the Forum code book, I see that Molly's "much, much later" is about the same as Mickey's "soon".
Much later. Much, much later on that thanks.
Italy, which has beautiful food and an agricultural system that has fresh, ripe produce available to pretty much all, also has enough celiac sufferers that gluten free options are common.
I live in a place that has a high proportion of both hippies and hipsters. "I can't eat gluten" is a common comment, but what they really mean generally isn't that they're either celiac or non-celiac gluten intolerant, but that US wheat products don't agree with them. Those are the people that happily eat bread in Europe.
For the rest of us, we either have an autoimmune disease (because that's what celiac is) or a digestive system that looks like it's been in a war. Neither of those rely on anyone's belief.
US farm subsidies don't really work in anyone's favor, not if your interest is in a nutritious, unprocessed diet. But eating a lot of plants, best if they're in season, and some high quality protein is probably better for almost all of us than things that come in boxes.
A PSA for the ladies out there:
Nutrients in semen:
citrate.
calcium.
magnesium.
potassium.
zinc.
fructose.
glucose.
protein.
lactic acid.
It's low in calories, the benefits can be enhanced if you toss a salad too and it won't cost you a dime.
You can thank me later.
@mayhem, I know you know this but comparing fruit, veggies and meat from a store to a local farm or garden is crazy. The store food tastes so different. Buying pork locally is like buying a completely different animal it's so different from the store. I think everyone knows processed food is absolute garbage but it's easy and cheap.
The US has some good and bad food choices. While it may be related, it doesn't mean gluten and peanut allergies are any less real.
Along the WTF lines, while in Paris, we were seated at an outdoor table at a restaurant and a couple was seated next to us. I couldn't help hear some of their conversation and he was either interviewing her as an escort or a part in a porn flick, but that's not the WTF part.
He starts to tell this girl that people from the US come here for the food because all of our fruits and veggies have lost all of their flavor. There is some truth to that, but not because the US soil is dead, like he told her. It's because supermarkets are bringing normally out of season food in from further away and it has to be picked before it's ripe, and much of that food never developes it's full flavor.
She of course had no reason to doubt him, so probably parrots this info to others to form an incorrect impression of the US. Not the first or last time that will happen.
@8 is mostly right about food, especially fast food. You can grow veggies in 5 gallon buckets that you get for free (with a bit of work) and grow stuff on your porch or tiny backyard, it's not easy but doable. I know a Mexican family that feeds a family of 4 that way. Most expensive part is the soil. Seeds are cheap but it does take a bit of effort and time which isn't easy at times.
I saw a video for a shopping method to eat healthier and save money. I tried it and liked it. It was the fastest I had ever shopped. It takes a little imagination and sauces jazz up the basics, but here goes:
Grab
5 vegetables
4 fruits
3 proteins
2 starches
1 extra.
I also needed one or two dairy items, such as milk or cheese.
I’m ready to try it again.
"...The avg person making $20-45K can't really afford Whole Foods and specialty stores..."
How many of those average people bring home cases of soda and the party size bags of chips on a regular basis?
You don't have to shop at Whole Foods or specialty stores in order to eat healthier, "real" food - I do the bulk of my grocery shopping at Walmart (often buying their Great Values brand of canned tomatoes, pasta, etc).
"...And a salad."
IYKYK! :-D
Because no good story ever started out with " we ordered a salad"
"...("and a salad" has become a bit of a joke among the regulars)"
We add "and a salad" to random sentences in our house all the time.
It's the new "that's what she said".
It is true that the Western world diet (particularly the United States) is the shittiest and the unhealthiest in the world. But, if you are someone that makes the effort to eat better than your peers, then you are ahead of the game. It you choose to do 'clean eating,' then you've beaten the stereotype of the Western world.
But, from personal experience, I can flat out tell you that my life's health issues prior to going gluten free were a wreck, no matter what I had done. When my health downfall started (March 2022,) it was subtle, and took 17 months for it to come to a head. It was three months (July 2022) after my medical downfall had started, that I went gluten free, at age 45. My health vastly improved, right off the bat. Fourteen months (September 2023) later at 46 years old, was when my health issue put me down, as the damage was already done... Forty five years of an unknown food allergy (gluten) will do a number on your large intestine. My health issue was diverticulitis and it was caused by stress from my job and my then, in the process-of-dying mother. I will refrain from details; but, I was close to intestinal rupture due to the internal pressure. If rupture did happen, I would have been dead within 72 hours due to sepsis. Like I said yesterday 8 Inch, if you need further convincing, I can share my medical records and images.
All of that could have been avoided, if it was known within my family before two, first cousins and I each finding the gluten intolerance on our own. I thank my cousins and they thank me for all of the hard research that we each have done. It sucks that there is a genetic trait within my family for a food allergy. But, I am very happy that my cousins and I found it! We have been sharing that information with the rest of the family. What the rest of my family does with that information, that is up to them and their individual lives.
As far as the genetic trait of gluten intolerance itself, I don't think that trait will wither and fade anytime soon. My family is the typical Irish-Catholics that just won't stop fucking! Every time I turn around, there's a new baby! What the fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"If you shop mostly the fresh meat and produce departments in your store your meals will be a lot more healthy than if you wander the aisles grabbing convenience foods with unpronounceable ingredients. "
It costs money or you need space to grow and hunt your own.
The avg person making $20-45K can't really afford Whole Foods and specialty stores.
They make fast food more affordable than the farmers' market.
Probably because too many people choose to eat those convenience foods with unpronounceable ingredients rather than the wonderful assortment of real foods available to us.
I hear you....
but the U.S. life expectancy....
We are below Saudia Arabia.
There about 57-58 other countries above us as well.
