choking

Absolutely love it with a trusted play partner (long term). First time date? no way!

"When do you do the choking before intercourse as foreplay or in the during the act. What position is best and how long do you do it for. "

Both. Actual choking is really not something you should be doing unless you have a firm grasp on the anatomy of the neck and large enough hands that you miss the trachea entirely. But you can get the same dominance effect, even if you have very small hands, by putting your thumb and forefinger in the soft, fleshy bits under the jaw and pushing, avoiding the trachea. It can be both foreplay and an element of rough sex.

Because I'm usually smaller than the person I'm doing this to, have small hands and a real concern about hurting anyone (seriously, do it wrong and you could accidentally kill your partner), I only do it when I can see their face.

I don't like being choked - I spent most of my childhood having nightmares of just that - but do appreciate hands on my neck in that dominance move I mentioned above as either part of a blowjob or standing up sex.

A choke can be 1 or 2 handed and done from just about any position. Unlike spanking/flogging that tends to be more foreplay-ish, the women that I know that like this definitely like it during play. Generally they want to be "manhandled" during sex and give at least the illusion/feeling of rough sex. They also tend to want to be pounded hard and long, but that's just my limited experience.

This is not something I look for but OK with doing if asked. It may also included slapping their ass and pulling their hair. The hair pulling also has it's own little tricks. If you want to do it for the feeling/illusion of rough sex then you pull in the same direction the hair is growing in. If you want to do it to cause pain (i.e. self-defense) then you pull it in the opposite direction.

As mentioned, the chocking can be dangerous if done wrong or for too long, so the slapping/hair pulling may be safer ways to scratch that itch. Sometimes just wrapping 2 hands around a girls neck with little to no pressure may serve the purpose, or doing that and applying downward pressure to her shoulders so that you can drive harder/deeper does the trick. It's one of those cases where less can be more.

When do you do the choking before intercourse as foreplay or in the during the act. What position is best and how long do you do it for.

The Mrs isn't a fan, but I have been with women that enjoy it. As mentioned, a choke (carotid) is different than a strangle (trachea). While both would fit in with the idea of "rough sex", the strangle generally causes pain and is more apt to cause damage. In martial arts, a rear naked choke just feels like a big old hug, except you go night night in a few seconds if done correctly.

There are a number of things that people like when it comes to this sort of thing that others don't want/like. Spanking/flogging is another example. I don't claim to understand why people like what they like, but I do try to do unto others as they want to be done unto ;-) Their enjoyment doesn't require that I understand it.

Tell us more this is Judy. I’ve never had this done and can’t see how you fit this into love making.

I guess I'm in the minority on this one. I

t's not something I would even consider doing with/to any woman, ever, for any reason. The idea of doing this to a woman, even in play, creeps me out and makes me shudder in revulsion. I've never been with couples who played doing this or suggested doing it. I guess it just isn't for me.

Squeezing the carotid artery is really what is being done. The brain graies out from lack of oxygen. If you squeeze the trachea, you run the serious risk of breaking the supporting cartilage. Which will lead to bad things.

I don’t think I’ve been with the woman who didn’t like it. I don’t think it’s so much about the pressure as it is about the dominance of it. When I do it’s typically with one hand with my fingertips on the sides of the neck but not on the trachea .

Exactly GGMM.

"Done correctly" is pretty key, along with trust.

We enjoy doing it to each other. Done correctly, at the right moment of play or sex, it is exquisite.

how do u feel about choking ur partner or being choked