Ms. Molly.. Wow.. I see now how you get your name. :) That is amazing feedback.. thank you!
Velma, thank you as well.. especially for the photo workshop.
Your artistic flair shines through there in spades. :)
Okay, now to get to work.. I'll post back here in a few days for a review. In the meantime, any other helpful feedback is obviously still welcome.
I opened a personal gallery for you to show you the kind of pictures you should have.
I actually don’t mind the pictures you have right now. I just think they’re in the wrong order.
I often say you should follow the DEBauCH method- Date picture, event picture, Beach picture, picture of the Chick and one of Him.
You’re kind of following that method right now. The only thing I would do is go to a Phillies game this weekend and take a picture and then go down the shore and take a picture of you too and your swimsuits. Maybe also take a picture of you to dress nicely like you’re going out on a date or church.
In the Private gallery, there are just too many photos generally and specifically too many of her and not enough of him or the two of you together. It's not a terrible strategy, because men are the primary initiators of contact here and hot photos of hot women definitely work to attract interest, but it doesn't work so well for many women. We tend to want to see photos of the couple, smiling and relaxed, and photos of him. Not his dick. That's fine in the same gallery that has the action shots, but don't open it for anyone that doesn't want to see the goods.
There are also some photos of her where she looks younger than others and one where she looks very young relative to him. Anyway, I'd think about keeping numbers 1, 3 or 4, not both, 8, 11, 12, 18, 20 and 21. I'd also consider a few more of the two of you together taken by others and one or two of him alone. Having ten or less is really better, because it's enough to give people an idea of you, but that may not be possible if you want to showcase her.
In the Personal gallery, my only comment, other than if you're going to show him naked, this is the place to do it, is that I'm probably in the minority in focusing more on the background clutter than the action. Clutter isn't the best signal though, even for those otherwise looking at what's front and center. (Yes, I know I sound like a prude. I'm not. But I've seen thousands of people having sex over the years and find it unexciting unless I'm in the same room. Then it's awesome and you could have laundry or whatever on every surface and I wouldn't notice a thing.)
Hope this helps.
nearly everyone who posts in this section would be willing to help with just about anything that might forward that goal.
Since the bulk of your photos are in private galleries, I'll be a little less specific about that content, but hope it still works. If you need more, just mail/im me.
Also, a caveat or two: Nobody looking casually at your photos is going to be thinking the things I'll be writing. None of us are that intentionally critical about details. But even without being aware or intentional, humans generally respond strongly to non-verbal information, even if we don't know why. When things are working great, there is no reason to pick nits, but you say they aren't, plus - on the positive side - you want to subtly indicate that the age difference and her actual age are not problems.
So, public photos:
Her dancing - It's pretty well composed and it's one of two where the extreme blurring isn't off-putting, but what she's wearing suggests extreme youth. Some middle aged men don't consider very young women to be out of their league, some do. Some women are thinking they have boots older than her. These are not things you want people thinking, so that's why this one isn't serving you, even though it's hot. Oh, and the reason I'm emphasizing those who are middle aged is that 40 to 55 is the largest demographic, at least in my experience. So, that means that is your largest pool.
Him with a bare torso - First, it's a half naked torso and an apparent bathroom selfie, which is never the right answer to any question. Second, there is (and I'm sorry if it sounds insulting, because that's not my intent, but I don't know how else to break down the problem) a kyphotic curve to his posture, which, even though it appears in those of all ages, signals late middle age and above. If you want to show his body, have a reason for it - at the pool or beach for instance - and make sure there isn't that forward rounding.
Her alone on a bed - This one is great. Even the wrinkles in the sheets add to the artistry.
The selfie of the two of you - First, it's a selfie. Your better option is to always have someone else take photos. Second, the blurring is distracting and it somehow emphasizes the age difference. Maybe it makes his beard greyer? This is one where I can't quite parse the extent of the issues.
The pretty one of the two of you in the foreground of a building - It's just too far away to give any useful information, plus the blurring is really extensive. It would be fine if the others were more informative, but they aren't.
If you're lucky, Velma will come around and tell you her system for public photos, but if not, it's in multiple threads.
Ms. Molly.. I don't take it personally at all and am very thankful for all that detail! We will digest this a bit and make changes over the next few days.
I almost hate to ask, since you have spent so much time already, but I would be interested to hear your more complete thoughts on our photos. To that end, I have opened all our pics to you.
Hi. You get to decide if what you read here is constructive or not, but please know it's all kindly meant. In your case, I'm taking you at your word that you're not getting the interest you hope for and treating that as a problem to solve. So, I'm going to tear your profile apart. Please don't take it personally, because it's about your profile, not you.
So, first, your photos are not inviting. The one of her curled up is lovely, but the are others are throwaways for various reasons. I'll explain if you like, but it's a little complicated and I'd rather not waste the words unless you're curious. Instead, please focus on photos of the two of you clothed, together, taken from far enough away that your blurred faces occupy less than a third of the photo. And, yes, because you're primarily searching for couples, a provocative shot of her is a nice teaser (it's mostly men doing the hunting), but not one that emphasizes her youth.
He is, as Velma pointed out, 47 and your toggles top out at 45. We like what we like, but you're indicating that he's two years past his pull date. If he's too old for her, then he's too old for me, regardless of my age. Since you already are trying to overcome the fairly significant dual deficit of a large age difference and her extreme youth (ask me how many 42 year old women are going to be supremely confident having their guys play with her), that's not going to go over well. At all.
Your tagline is fine, but the first letter is capitalized and it doesn't need that period.
I'll get to the specific sections shortly, but my initial impression is that the two of you are far from a sure thing in looking for compatible playmates. Like, maybe you will, but you probably won't. If that's not accurate, you might want to think about how you position yourself generally.
Looking For is really meant to be about the people you're looking for - you have some of that, but it isn't particularly inviting - and a bit about what you're looking for. Is it FWBs? NSA? A social as well as sexual connection? There is a hint here, but not phrased in a way that anyone would read it and say, oh, hey, that sounds like what we want too. Do say something about who you're looking for, mention solo women if you are actually interested in them as well and perhaps flesh out what he might be looking for in solo play.
In Description, you've wasted words on things that are in your stats and photos - height and appearance - and added that thing about him looking significantly younger, which generally signals some sensitivity about age. You've also talked about yourselves as individuals rather than as a couple, which sends yet another less than optimal signal about your relationship. I'm certain it's unintentional and untrue, but that's kind of the undertone to this approach.
Instead, talk about the kind of couple you are and only a little about yourselves as individuals. Focus on who you are and what your interests might be.
I'm not sure what is going on in Fantasies, but what you've written contains nothing about your fantasies or real experience. If it was a little less like a shopping list, I'd say it goes in Looking For, but it's very much like a shopping list, so maybe consider leaving it as part of your private conversation that needn't be shared with others.
Additional comments is the second place where you seem to indicate you're not necessarily interested in swinging, although you'd like some of the social aspects. Maybe talk some more together if that's not what you mean to convey.
The Sydney University thing is based on an internet hoax. Please delete it in its entirety.
That's all I have for now. I hope you collect more opinions, makes some changes and then come back for a review.
I have been wondering if that might be the bigger issue. When we're out in clubs, meet and greets, etc.. age never really comes up as an issue, but then again.. I don't know who's not approaching us either so.. could be just a thing.
@VelmaAndShaggy.. not really trying to be douchy but I can see your point. The SLS guidelines for the slider are for the age of the younger partner, right? But it did make for an interesting convo and I think we'll be changing it.
@ourbradybunch6.. I really appreciate you spelling out your reaction so carefully.. that is super helpful!
You're sure to get a lot of helpful advice here, but the one thing that stands out to me is the age difference between you. There's nothing wrong with it if it works for you, but it is an issue for some folks . I could easily see my wife being interested in him, but i generally prefer older women. Having said that, we judge everyone on their individual merits, and nothing we see in your profile would turn us away.
The biggest issue I see is that your age sliders max out at 45 when the male half is 47. So... I would avoid you as a couple because it’s kind of douchy. I might change that to 55.
We have been on SLS long enough to see some really great profiles and lots of questionable ones. We have made tweaks here and there, but still we don't see as much interest as some of our friends.
So, the questions are.. what about the profile could be better / more appealing? What about our profile is intimidating or would make you want to pass us by.
All constructive criticism is welcome..
Thanks everyone!
