Perception

Fair enough

"Why isn't that precise statement in your profile narrative?"

Because I don't want to invite in people who need what I have to offer. Instead, I look for couples, happily married men, and single workaholics, people who are content with what is already on their plates. These are people whose cups runneth over and since they're already full, I don't have to carefully weigh and measure what is safe and what would lead to an uncomfortable conversation where I explain the difference between being loving and being in love. I like to show all the way up, without reservations, but without creating discomfort for someone who has empty spots that need to be filled. So, I look for situations where I will be garnish rather than water in the desert.

I don't want to change jobs. I'm a decent writer, but a better editor. That's something I've been doing for decades, everything from doctoral dissertations to poetry chapbooks. My subject verb agreement is always suspect and I dangle participles like it's a vocation, but I'm good at making sure it still sounds like the writer when it's done, so I often have a project on hand.

Damn, if I could write like that I'd change jobs...today.

But that begs a question from me, MsMolly. Why isn't that precise statement in your profile narrative? I think that paragraph is possibly the warmest, most inviting thing I have ever hear from a lady...ever. I can't imagine why it's not in the description of you.

On the other hand, you might not need the onslaught of contacts from men wanting a massage with their BJ.

Hijack away, HV. Sharing is caring. ;-)

"What is your schtick?"

For men and couples, I give the girlfriend experience. I'm deeply interested in everything anyone tells me and never forget any of it. I'm always up for sex but also available for social occasions, if that's what you need. I'm affectionate before and cuddly after. I'm easy to talk to and give massages as freely as blowjobs. I'll send you home with a jar of chicken soup if you're a little under the weather. If you text me, I'll always respond. And then I go away, because I have a busy life and no interest in the work required for a longterm relationship.

"What is your target market's fantasy?"

That they matter. And that's an easy one, because they do.

Velma&Shaggy quotes:

But... We all have to have a schtick here. I play the big-breasted Jewish girl you never got to fuck in high school or the dirty teacher you fantasized about at your PTA meeting. You're well.... we all know your schtick.

"I really want some small black cock" said no southern white girl ever. I mean, look who certed you.

I’m glad you brought this up. It seems that everyone one has something that they use to stand out or to make themselves a preferred partner.

But are our “schticks” any different than others.

The voluptuous woman
The well endowed man
The milf/hotwife

Even though don’t play the ‘BBC’ card, I subsequently fall in that category of lifestyle terms.

To others reading: What is your schtick?

Another Velma&Shaggy quote: You aren't my type, but in a case like this with a body like yours, I think it's okay to do the dick pics because your target market is looking for that particular fantasy.

This caught my attention: target market is looking for that particular fantasy.

To you and to others reading: What is your target market’s fantasy?

HV

Yeah, I'm not crazy about the sweatpants and underwear thing.

But... We all have to have a schtick here. I play the big-breasted Jewish girl you never got to fuck in high school or the dirty teacher you fantasized about at your PTA meeting. You're well.... we all know your schtick.

"I really want some small black cock" said no southern white girl ever. I mean, look who certed you.

You aren't my type, but in a case like this with a body like yours, I think it's okay to do the dick pics because your target market is looking for that particular fantasy. So I would add a pic of you in a suit, but you can keep the dick pics in this case.

Njnybiwfemme

I’m 28.

And have I read your responses on declining partners. The advice was greatly appreciated.

HV

Goodgolly

Just so you know, I simply hijacked:

I keep physically active and prefer those who I play with to do the same. I don't expect you to be a model, but I'm definitely drawn to a proportionate and appealing package. That includes thick, curvy, petite, slim and a few extra pounds.

And used it!!

That statement is accurate and it is more comprehensive then what I had before.

And yes motel art does match the drapes, but does nothing else. ;)

Thanks for your advice

A woman’s touch is something beautiful.

HV

Motel art doesn't do anything except sit there and match the drapes. It's better if people aren't motel art. ;-)

I think you answered your own question in your description of what works for you. That level of detail isn't present in your profile, instead you talk about HWP, which is a rather narrower gauge than what you actually like. Right now you have: "I like to (take) care of my body and I prefer those who I play with to do the same. I don't expect you to be a model, but I ask that you are well kept." What about changing that to something more like: "I keep physically active and prefer those who I play with to do the same. I don't expect you to be a model, but I'm definitely drawn to a proportionate and appealing package. That includes thick, curvy, petite, slim and a few extra pounds."

I think just by inserting that phrase about a few extra pounds, even if you ultimately decide to politely reject everyone who is even a few pounds overweight, it will greatly reassure current and future playmates. Women worry about their bodies way too much and sometimes rely on men to reflect their beauty back to them, so by giving them some kind of wiggle room in weight, you're already doing some of that positive reflection.

Goodgollly

I always enjoy your in depth insight.

I was skeptical of putting up a workout pic because it seems generic in a sense. I am a personal trainer/fitness enthusiast so looking apart becomes part of the territory, but I probably should add depth to that selection of pics. I guess I was trying to leave out any doubt as to what my body looks like.

What’s wrong with motel art?!? Lol

When it comes to my partners, I do like ppl who are HWP. Being in shape is a plus but having a decent looking body never hurts. Your statement of me making older women feel insecure, is something that I’ve actually had talks about with my female partners. Somd feel intimidated because of what I present to the table and feel as if they don’t measure up. But I see otherwise. All are shaped differently but appealing to the eye, which I enjoy.

My question is: How do I make it plain that I prefer a woman in decent shape without sounding shallow but still come off as having a standard?

I don’t mind thick curvy, or slim and petite or a few extra pounds; I just want the overall “package” to be proportionate and appealing. I don’t expect everyone to be a model.

So from your standpoint: how should I reword that and not have an endless list of requirements?

HV

Velma & Shaggy

I’m assuming you’re referring to :

The one of me sitting in sweats
Me in underwear
Me in a towel

As dick shots?

I would consider those, besides the one of me sitting in sweats, as an open book so there is no surprise of falsehood, but I see you where you’re coming.

The suit and tie pic just might have to go up sooner than expected. Lol

HV

I looked at your profile a couple of hours ago and then went on with my day, letting it percolate. Please understand that I'm just looking at what messages your profile sends, not holding a referendum on your personal traits or describing how I actually see you.

The many iterations around fitness add up to a feeling of shallowness that isn't completely erased by the depth found elsewhere in your profile. Your photos underscore that emphasis on the merely physical, because you're not actually doing anything in them. Your body is beautiful, but what is that beauty for? Fitness without activity is static, like motel art.

There's also a sentence that has been bugging me since you first asked for a profile review and I think I just figured out the problem and the solution. "I prefer mature individuals, not necessarily in age but in understanding." The problem is that the way it's written, it subtly undercuts the openness that your wide age range would otherwise signal. Mix that with a desire for the fit and well kept, that could make a lot of women over 40 feel a little insecure about you. If you change that sentence to "I prefer mature individuals," it won't keep away anyone younger than you while eliminating that source of hesitancy.

Cut out one of the three mentions of drama. You get a special pass for special circumstances, but three is an eyebrow raiser.

Mostly you sound like a mature 20-something with some life experience and a fairly good idea of what you want. So unless you want to project something else, I think you're right on track, with the exception of the things I noted.

Honestly, I see mostly positives.

I think I would prefer to have fewer dick shots. It doesn't do anything for me, but you've got 10 certs, so you're probably pleasing the target demographic's fantasy.

Maybe one pic in a suit and tie, but I other than that you're probably fine the way it is.

When you look over my profile, what perception do you get of me?

What are the positives and negatives?

I’m trying to figure out if the message that we put out, is the message that’s being received.

Hv