You made good changes in the right places:
The only thing I would add to your profile is a formal wear photo. You want to show people what you will look like when you show up to your first date.
Otherwise, it looks pretty good.
Nice job.
Sorillo - thank you very much, we will keep reading!
GoodGolly- you were the other one I was very much hoping would respond. Thank you very much for your advice. We will be working together on this in an effort to take all your advice in and make ours better!
Have a great night everyone!
For obvious reasons, I can't really recommend anything specific on your profile, but the fact that you were hoping that Velma would reply tells me something important. You're reading the Better Profiles forum.
GOOD GOOD GOOD GOOD!
There's a huge amount of good advice to be had there, and you've shown that you're smart enough to read it. So you know my standard advice, because you've already read some of it, right? ;) Read read and read some more. And start writing while keeping that advice in mind, because a lot of that stuff is going to apply to you as well.
I'm probably digressing a bit, but one frustration I have with a lot of requests for profile help is that when you read their profile and their plea, it becomes obvious that they didn't bother to read any of the other advice threads. Geez. There are SO many tools there for folks to use if they just put in a little time to gather the information, which is there for the asking. So kudos to you.
Hi and welcome. In your photos, I definitely think the boob and butt shots can go. The swimsuit photo is great, those three aren't. For the rest, let Velma be your guide.
I like the tagline. It's just right for your ages and newness. Looking For, not so much. This is the place to talk about who you're looking for, what you would like to do with them (by which I mean finding friends, meeting for dinner or drinks), and maybe a little about your interests in various styles of play. It's not the place to talk about yourselves, except very narrowly. We're looking for...and we would like... Not that awkward, obvs, but like that.
Some of what you have could pretty easily be moved to Description, which is where it actually belongs. I would suggest you leave off the parts about being secure in your marriage, that you love each other, and that you're a package deal. All three indicate a certain amount of defensiveness which might also read as a greater possibility of drama. The single men ALL CAPS notation can go as well. Just block them with your toggles.
In your actual description, don't duplicate what is in your toggles. And unless your whiteness is important to you for some reason, there's no reason to mention something that's pretty evident in your photos. Instead, rewrite and repurpose some of what is currently in Looking For and then add some text about what you like to do, individually and as a couple. You'd think that would be useless information on a swingers' site, but it is actually what gets people emailing you and responding positively to your overtures.
Oh, and before I forget, you often need two blank lines in between paragraphs in order to avoid that distracting crushed together look.
In Fantasies, the first line is great. The last two need to go far, far away. I'm undecided about the second line. I firmly believe that you should talk about your likes and limits with every playmate, which means anything that isn't designed to send a specific signal to potential playmates is redundant. However, I mention BDSM in my profile to make sure I don't miss a kinky playmate. So, I guess it depends on how much you like your light pain and anal play and whether they're either a requirement or something of compelling interest.
Additional comments is a great place to put the part about being DD free. And maybe something charming to seal the deal. Think of it as a coda to your tagline, maybe.
Good luck!
VandS, I was hoping you would reply!
I have taken out the word BBW (just waiting for it to be approved)- thank you for the suggestion and tomorrow AM I will get face pictures in our private section to share with others.
Thank you so much!
I have exactly six minutes until spin class starts.
I think your profile is pretty good the way it is. I strongly suggest to put some face pictures in your private section-I will not meet couples without face pictures and I will not text or Kik Face pictures to them either. So that is one major strike against you.
Please take out the word “BBW” - Including that word is going to make people automatically reject you.
That’s all I have for now-got to get to class.
Hi!
We have been members for about a month or so, but not yet active as we have been trying to get our profile up and running.
Could any of you give us a hand please? We would love to better it so we can start getting to know people and having fun! Hoping to have it golden before the Hallowswing event we are attending!
Thank you!
