Meeting a couple, how do you get things started?

The only advice I can give here to a single male is let the woman make the decision. Things are only going to move as fast as she wants to go. My wife would shut it down at the touching in a public place however she might respond to it in a more private setting such as at a club. Oh and it bears saying some women simply don't like to kiss. For some it is "this is reserved for my husband" for others like my wife they are just not that into it (even with me). Conversation is key and if you reach the point where you don't think things are going anywhere be polite and yet direct. I like the idea of "I had a wonderful time but it is getting late and I am sure you two have things to discuss." or something similar. Honestly if the couple has plans to take it further that night they may just take that as a sign and move things along but if not it gives a feeling you are giving them time and space and not rushing the process. BTW this Alpha male BS may work in some instances but in many others it may instigate a territorial response from the husband/significant other. In my case I don't mind sharing my wife and love it when she enjoys herself but there is only room for one Alpha in our relationship and an attempt to exert "dominance" in the situation will end badly with us going nope and leaving.
BTW with couples this advice still rings true let the women decide. Things are only going to progress as fast as the least sure woman allows. Yes there can be some lack of being sure on the male half of a couple as well but lets face it guys we are far more willing to have sex with others without being too selective than our female counterparts.

I would say you wanna play hide the sausage

Letsmingle, when one of them excuses themself to the bathroom and discuss the topic. If no one has used the bathroom, excuse yourself to give them time to openly discuss. If things seem to be stalling, simply say something along the lines of "I've had a really enjoyable evening and hope we can plan something in the near future but I'm sure you guys prefer to discuss this, but I do hope you get back to me." people who are newer to the game usually don't play on the 1st date. (and don't have cue phrases) Clubs are probably your best choice. If a lady is nice to you, chat with her husband as well. If she's single, if she comes back around to chat with you, she's at least entertained by your conversation. Ask her what she's looking for. Most won't straight up say "let's go get a room" a lot of women still like men to make the 1st move.

Confident and Alpha describing the same object of the subject......lol that will go far. Just be confident.

~Allen

Women want confident alpha males for a mfm. Act like one.

I never realize there was so much input when I created this post.So it was just not me having this problem.So many responses especially the ladies.But personally I feel like there is not a right way unless everybody is horny and is clicking on all eight cylinders but does make for interesting reading all these responses

IN ACCORDANCE WITH THE PROPHECY

You guys sound like you are all in high school, umm golly geee are you not meeting people for possible sex with them? You know sex does involve touching and women expect the man to take the lead.

“Any suggestions for if I ever run into something like that again.?”

OP: I would agree with GGMM, show an interest and flirt, but never be the one to initiate touch. Even meeting couples, I only show an interest and do not initiate into personal space. YMMV in meeting couples, but will go further than any meet if you make first physical contact. She will touch you on the arm or leg and let you know if she is interested in moving to a more intimate zone.

Since we meet close to home and are well known in our area, a single male trying to kiss or hold hands with Mrs. 888 in a public setting will guarantee they leave our company immediately. The same can be applied as being pushy or rude in a club setting, as asking permission first is a requirement before ANY type of physical contact takes place.

~Allen

"If he touched her on the arm as he spoke, would that be an instant no for you? We have met single guys who just sit there and waited for rabbit to make the first move and that is a turn off. If a guy doesn’t initiate a conversation or flirt with her, she will smile and touch his arm and give him hints that she is interested but if makes no effort, we send him off and call it a night."

It's situational. That was kind of my point to the OP, who might not know that however good your advice is, it's not universally applicable. The last two successes were actually pretty direct. The first one started by playing with my fingers, but we were at a m & g and he initiated the conversation by saying something really sweet and non-skeevy and then asked how I would feel if he did x before he took each step. The second was the husband of one of my playmates and he just grinned and put his arm around me, but since I fuck his wife as often as I can, it already felt like we were fairly intimate, so it was fine. Those are both men who know how to read a room, though, and I don't think the OP is.

And it can be tricky with couples. My former partner was totally fine in foursomes and groups, but in the presence of another alpha man for a threesome he'd do the metaphorical equivalent of pissing a circle around me, which wasn't fun for anyone, so it only worked with someone laid back who didn't initiate any sort of touch that might appear to be claiming. If that makes any sense.

Ms Molly you are a lesbian what do you know about swinging?

All of that was an effort to give a basic class on reading body language. I could have told him to sit beside her and turn his shoulders in her direction and see if she responds in kind or if she turns away or remains “closed off”.

I made the assumption that since they agreed to meet, there was at least some interest in play but it sounds like he made no effort to find out.

If he touched her on the arm as he spoke, would that be an instant no for you? We have met single guys who just sit there and waited for rabbit to make the first move and that is a turn off. If a guy doesn’t initiate a conversation or flirt with her, she will smile and touch his arm and give him hints that she is interested but if makes no effort, we send him off and call it a night.

~S~

"If the conversation is flowing well, ask her for a kiss (or just lean in for a brief kiss and see if she kisses back). Compliment her (with sincerity, not the fawning "you are a goddess BS some here will spew). If she is receptive to your touch, your kiss, to you in general, go a little further. Kiss more passionately, brush your hand over her breast, kiss her neck. Geez, it sounds like I'm teaching teenage boys how to make out! "

I'm not saying this is bad advice, not at all, but it's not universally applicable. I don't actually like anyone touching me while I'm still deciding if I want to fuck them. It's because if you get close enough to kiss my neck the answer will invariably be yes, but I will resent you for pushing my on button before I decided you had permission to do so. So the only touching at a first meeting is what I initiate.

It's different for me, first because I don't play on an initial meet except at clubs and parties, and second because I'm female and the rules are different for me. But. But I do meet couples and if I'm interested, I make that clear by saying so and that if they feel the same, I'd be happy to discuss further. And if they need time to confer, I'm good with that as well.

No offense but if you aren't sure how to initiate sex with a swinger couple, this is going to be quite a long and frustrating process for you.

Not knowing the circumstances, I'll guess that you were invited to their place or they came to yours? You offer a drink or if offered, you accept yours and sit next to the lady. Have a conversation, if they are new, ask what got them interested in the LS. I presume you had some conversation beforehand and had read their profile so you knew they were receptive to a single male so you flirt, you touch her arm, you look for clues that she is interested. Is she smiling, nodding, touching your arm or leg? Look at the guy from time to time to gauge his reaction, is he smiling or does he look pissed?

If the conversation is flowing well, ask her for a kiss (or just lean in for a brief kiss and see if she kisses back). Compliment her (with sincerity, not the fawning "you are a goddess BS some here will spew). If she is receptive to your touch, your kiss, to you in general, go a little further. Kiss more passionately, brush your hand over her breast, kiss her neck. Geez, it sounds like I'm teaching teenage boys how to make out!

Seriously, if you were waiting for them to make the first move, they are probably sitting at home right now wondering what you were waiting for!

Now if she didn't respond to your flirting, your kiss or if the guy seemed uncomfortable, then maybe you weren't a good match and it's time to move on. From the sound of it though, it seems both you and the couple were too shy to make the first move. You need to figure out how to flirt without being pushy.

~S~

I would advise no man who would like to impress a woman here in 2018 to put her hand on his cock as a way of complimenting her. Because no woman born after 1947 is going to be anything but skeeved out.

Its a art that has to be done right. Make the woman feel beautiful and sex. She does the woman thing of eating it up by denying that she looks that good. Its that that right moment that you say give me your hand and you take her and and say you caused this as i gently put her hand on my erection. i then say a man cant not lie if you are sexy and beautiful he will be hard as a rock.

She has her hand on my very hard cock..its make her beam with pleasure, she is really that sexy.

One of the skills a man picks up over the years as a swinger. The other skill is being able to get rock hard whenever i want to.

I would be so completely sleeved if a guy I met for drinks took my hand and put it on his crotch! Yikes.

As part of a couple meeting other couples, i always make the woman feel beautiful and sexy. Such as wow you are more sexy then your pictures and how nice it is to look at you, then i tell her husband what a lucky man hie is. This is after the introductions and some small talk.

Remember what they both want is a confident man.

When i am ready to get things into sexual mode, to see if they want to go play i then compliment the woman again on how sexy or beautiful she is. Women always say something like i am not that sexy or some form of denial. With a smile of course. I then says with a nice smile you are give me your hand. i then place her hand on my erection and say you caused this. A man can not lie. You are that sexy.
A woman who is meeting for sex loves this and will keep her hand on my erection, its like hard evidence of how good she looks.
I then say that you have talented hands lets go play.

The trick is to be able to get an rock hard erection when you want on.

I have met with couples a lot of times and it was just talking. Just be your Self . And if they are new it may take a few days for then to ask you back . But be ready to move on ! Some times it just don't work out > some times we just don't click< When it does It can become a lasting friend ship.

I met my 1st couple.They seem nervous but we all got along.How do you start things? Do you make the 1st move? Suggest lets go in bedroom? Nothing happen on my meet and I ended up going home.Any suggestions for if I ever run into something like that again.?