oh...dear GAWD...I cant believe I'm going to do this but...I agree with Ncal (jeez that was painful to type!)
AZMnN if you need a chest to rest your head on till the pain subsides I'm here for ya sweetie
XOXOXO Rosie (snort LOL)
Sex is one of the few areas in which I am completely OK with others discriminating against me for absolutely any reason they wish.
If a bi couple doesn't want me solely because I'm straight, if an AA woman doesn't want me because I'm white, if a young woman doesn't want me because I'm, well...not, if it's because I'm bald, even if it's because I'm not too bright.
It's all good with me.
I enjoy being a straight guy and a bi women, so many choices....
oh...dear GAWD...I cant believe I'm going to do this but...I agree with Ncal (jeez that was painful to type!)
My wife is an absolute, totally hardcore STR8 woman, downright homophobic BUT she is also what I call a "dyke magnet", women hit on her all the time and while some are understanding, others debate the benefits of it with her in a friendly way and then there are the ones we call "the recruiters", VERY aggressive, pushy, insistent and adamant that my wife "is bi but just hasnt admitted it yet". These women somehow dont understand that the lifestyle rule of "No means NO" also applies to women.
Labels what goes on behind closed doors is up to the people involved if all agrees go for it have fun just be honest.
Sond bi men are so much easier to deal with then the bi women are for my wife. My wife is straight and is not interested in women sexually. The bi women are very aggressive to her and some don't take a no thank you for an answer.
One pitched a crying screaming fit at a party, it was really strange to see her doing that naked.
So many women have never been told no. They just don't know how to handle it by another woman.
My point is simply that just because person A's preferences (or non-preferences as in this case) mean that person B isn't a match for them, that doesn't mean that there's something wrong with person A. We don't know the reasons for person A's preferences, so to automatically assume that it's because they're phobic, or jealous is simply.... wrong. At least until they say WHY. Then, at least, we have something concrete to judge.
To flip it on it's ear, how many times have we seen single straight men complain about couples who aren't interested in playing with single men? "Why would they deny themselves the opportunity for a pleasurable experience? There must be something wrong with them!" I've seen variations of that statement a bunch of times on the fora, and it's just as wrong for that SM to make that assumption of the couple being flawed because they're not interested in SMs.
People want what they want. I'm simply uncomfortable with the idea of shaming people for expressing their desires.
Thanks for the honest reply. It is sad that some BiM might cross a boundary. As a single that joins couples, I try hard (pardon the pun) to spell out the rules and obey them. [I understand that it could be a turnoff to some couples to get "interogated" but I want the experience to be fun for all.]
Sond the reason why is that there husbands don't want a bi male involved in sex with their wife or in a mfm. They are concerned that the bi male will start to touch them instead of just focusing on the pleasures of their wife.
As a very experienced swinger and the male of the couple I have had bi men start to fondle my balls when I was fucking their wife at a party. While I simply say no thanks the less experienced man is repulsed by the idea of that happening to him and does what it takes to prevent the situation from happening
This is why the women say no bi males.
"sondes, have you considered the possibility that these ladies might have had a bad experience with bi males in the past, or she simply finds the idea of male/male sexual contact to be unattractive?"
I've had a bad experience with a Serbian man, so do I just assume it's okay to specify NO SERBS? Or is it that when you substitute anything else for bi men in the "She's not interested in x" kinds of statements, it's pretty clear that homophobia is present? As for m/m contact, sucking a cock is sucking a cock. And since I've seen a lot of DPs in clubs and at parties, but have never seen anyone saying they find DPs unattractive and won't play with anyone who has had them, anal sex clearly isn't a problem either.
Be as biphobic as you wanna be, but don't pretend it's anything it isn't.
sondes, have you considered the possibility that these ladies might have had a bad experience with bi
males in the past, or she simply finds the idea of male/male sexual contact to be unattractive?
Can't speak to their past experiences, but what male/male contact? If the couple is straight/straight, I will respect that. It just like any rule (no kissing, etc.). It isn't like I'm going to do something without consent.
Or are you asserting that the only POSSIBLE reasons that someone might not want to play with bi men is
because the women are all jealous, bigoted and obsessed with cooties? Because that's the way your
comment reads.
Well, I didn't intend it that way, but I don't see the reason (other than, as you mentioned, perhaps prior bad experiences).
sondes, have you considered the possibility that these ladies might have had a bad experience with bi males in the past, or she simply finds the idea of male/male sexual contact to be unattractive?
Or are you asserting that the only POSSIBLE reasons that someone might not want to play with bi men is because the women are all jealous, bigoted and obsessed with cooties? Because that's the way your comment reads.
Openminded239
Im heterosexual.
So HV.... are you bi?
As a single BiM, I find it funny to see some couples list "she only plays with straight men".
I certainly respect boundaries. Are the women worried that I'm secretly looking at their partner's junk while I'm play with the woman? Are the women worried that I have some "bi" cootie that will spread to her husband?
ZeroDrama, thank you. Even though I did find some errors I made, I hope the messsge was clear nonetheless,
HV
HungVet , I really like your view on this and you use great grammar , something I like .
Sounds to me like some men in the LS are confused about who they are. They find themselves in situations and become open to new experiences, but struggle with embracing who they truly are.
“A straight that likes to suck cock.”
Incorrect
You’re a bisexual male that prefers women more than men but doesn’t mind a cock in your mouth.
That’s not going into whether the taste of cum excites you or the if feeling of a cock in your ass gets you to the next level.
Even in these different age ranges, we still find ppl who don’t know themselves.
Embrace that fact that you’re bi. If you heard someone say of another “that guy likes to suck dick” you would call the guy gay. So why the play on words, in regards to yourself?
Having a wife and kids doesn’t make you straight. How you choose to embrace your sexuality is.
If diving in pussy and swallowing cock is something you like to do, then be honest with yourself about it.
You swing both ways. Just be honest with the couples and/or singles you play with.
Is it that hard?
HV
Ok, if a guy sucks cock, is he bi...or is he is a straight guy that likes to suck cock? Who gets to decide....who gives a rats ass?
A guy that plays with both male and female is bi.
It’s that simple.
I’ve heard of many “manly men” who either enjoy sucking dick, being fucked in the ass by another male or cleaning a man’s cock after he’s finished cumming in your wife. Those are bisexual tendencies.
A straight man that sucks?? That doesn’t make sense.
You may not fully engage in a bisexual lifestyle but you do embrace bisexual activities.
If you enjoy pussy and dick, then you’re bisexual of some sort.
Bi-curious
Bi-situational
Bi-friendly
Bisexual
Pick one?
HV
Ok, if a guy sucks cock, is he bi...or is he is a straight guy that likes to suck cock? Who gets to decide....who gives a rats ass?
As a single male, I consider it courtesy that the couples disclose such information. If the husband has interest in bi-activities I ask that they be upfront, so that I can make the decision on my behalf.
I’ve had situations where me not playing with the husband was a deal breaker, and I gladly declined because I don’t play that way. Other cases were that the husband asked me ahead of time, I declined and was still able to play with the wife with no issues from him.
But I do feel, if the couple wants to have that option then a bi-male should be there preference. Asking a straight male to engage in that activity, can go either way depending on the male.
If you’re a husband, who knows that he gets bi-situational at times, or has bisexual wonderingly, this should be said in your profile, because the possibility can happen.
Simply just be front
HV
Well that sure puts a damper on the party this weekend
more bi male bashing. let's not forget eating pussy can give you throat cancer.
I have no issue with labels, whether you introduce yourself as a bi man or just a straight guy who likes to suck cock once in awhile, the fact of the matter is you will suck cock and most people will think of you as being bi or gay. Maybe I'm wrong and I'm willing to admit it, but when a guy tells me he's straight but likes to suck cock I automatically think he's in denial and afraid of the stigma of being labeled bi or gay.
I think that is just going to make it more difficult to find someone who is going to make you happy and can also be a little dangerous because to satisfy your desire to suck a cock once in awhile you may be less selective when finding the right guy, and you will attract the type of guy who is less selective about where he finds a guy to suck him off.
Ya know while I have no issues with labels or what others do I will say I personally do not play with a bi or bi curious male for health reasons. If I knew they were only bi-oral that would be different (yes, really).
Now that I've broached that subject I have been wondering how many LS people (bi males specifically or their playmates) are using PrEP (Truvada (tenofovir disoproxil fumarate/emtricitabine) as pre-exposure prophylaxis)? Most of my gay male friends use it and we have had conversations about the LS and they think a good many in the LS are or should be using it too.
Thoughts ?
