Profile Help

You already have a decent profile. And apparently know the difference between discrete and discreet!

The sentence fragments in Description are mildly annoying but that should be easy to fix. You've already gotten good specific advice about your text - pretend I said it as well.

Getting better pictures will probably be much more time consuming to deal with! Velma's DEBauCH system is great for core photos in your public gallery - remember to smile, watch for clutter or visual chaos in the background and avoid selfies.

I wish you continued fun!

~Phoebert's Wife

Thank you very much molly. I will heed to your critiques, and make the changes. I reread my profile, and what you guys have said is in line with what I want, a better profile. Thank you

Hi. You've had the disclaimer, so I won't iterate it. Also, you might want to collect multiple opinions before you make any changes.

Anyway, I'll get right to it. First, for some reason, you have a duplicate cert (it's dated 10/12/18), but I'm not certain if it's a site glitch, where deleting one would delete both, or if you could just eliminate one. Second, your tagline isn't a book title, so only the initial letter should be capitalized.

For your text, you've had good advice that I'm probably going to duplicate, because I'm lazy. In Looking For, I'd just get rid of the "most importantly" thing, because it interrupts the flow of that sentence. The sentence about race not being an issue, suitably amended, is something I'd put in Additional comments and there are actual reasons for that. Instead, you might add another sentence about your play style. Maybe that you're interested in on going or fwbs or nsa or whatever. It's not necessary in this case, but what's there feels a little truncated right now.

In Description, I don't love the grammatical tense you're using in the first two sentences, since they're distancing, but it may be an accurate view of you. Anyway, your certs say you're very personable, so I don't actually think it matters. The only thing I'd take out is the part about not being disappointed. Your certs say that much better than you have.

In Fantasies, I'd eliminate the FYI and just go straight to the foot fetish. Unless you must have that as part of your play, you could probably drop "serious" as well. Also, it's been a long time since I've seen anyone use the word "frolicking" and I found it delightful. Thanks for the word usage smile.

In Additional comments, you need something. This is your last chance to shine and you've wasted it. Say something charming or inviting or practical (check other profiles for ideas) and then end with the race is not an issue statement, which here is a signal for openness that is more effective than buried in the middle of your profile.

As far as photos, could you please smile. Smiles are pretty important to women and, at least for me, reassuring on some level.

That's all I have. And since I neglected to say so earlier, you have a good profile that just needs some fiddling to be even better. Good luck.

Thank you, I will change the things you highlighted. Much appreciated.

Disclaimer: This isn't about you, it's about your profile. We're going to say some things that might be hard to swallow, but like medicine, while it doesn't taste good going down ultimately it will cure your profile ills.

The biggest issue I see is your pics. Get rid of the bathroom selfie. Find pics that follow the DEBauCH method Velma talks about it almost every profile thread in this forum.

As far as the text goes, I like the brevity. Short and sweet, you make your point clearly and concisely. There are some grammar issues that in some cases are simply a matter of preference. I'm not a fan of "dark treat" but it's you selling yourself so leave it in if you like. The one that stands out most is you say you speak in complete sentences, but you don't write in them. "Respectful of boundaries, feelings and desires" is not a complete sentence. For folks looking for a reason to say "No" (and most are, frankly), that contradiction is enough to get you a thumbs down.

Use ladies instead of females.

I think the phrase "Race is not an issue, attitude is" flows better if you modify it to "Race is not an issue, but attitude is". I might even add a "absolutely" in there for more emphasis.

I'm not a fan of the way you used "most importantly". I prefer to put "most important" in parentheses to make it stand out, as well as give it the flow you'd have if you were reading the profile aloud.

That's the final tip. Read this aloud, exactly the way it's written and punctuated. That's the true test of whether you'll achieve your goal of improving your profile or if it still needs work.

I would like some help to improve my profile. Any feedback will greatly be appreciated.