Does the nervous excitement ever go away?

So in reading the replies so far, the Mrs and I seem to be the excpetion rather than the rule. I'd have thought that more people would have gotten to the point we're at. We definitely look forward to LS parties, but get about as nervous as we would going to a kids birthday party. When we were going to parties more regularly, when it was time to leave I'd say to the Mrs, "OK, it time to go fuck people" and she'd smile and joke back with something liike, "OK. If we have to" ;-)

I still get super nervous literally every single time lmao. But I will say that now I guess my brain connects that feeling with play time, so the nervousness turns me on haha!

We've only been to a couple of hotel takeovers and found that people tended to get extremely wasted. We assumed because they didn't have to keep in mind the need to drive home. Have not seen quite the same thing at destination resorts but there are definitely those people who feel they need to get every drop of liquor they paid for in the all inclusive price.

Being nervous means there is a fire inside and that's a good thing... At least if there is a desire to go along with the nervousness...

Hotel take overs can be relatively expensive, but people, particularly newbies, may find it less intimidating since they will have their own space that they can go to and know that they will have privacy, if need be,

House parties can cover a range of comfort levels. For example, some will have private room space and some will not. That is another reason we don't do open invites. For a larger party, we just don't have enough play rooms to be able to accommodate a couple going in room and closing the door and tying up a bedroom for an hour or so.

Hotel room parties, not to be confused with takeovers, are almost guaranteed to be all open room play. If people are not comfortable with that, I can see people being very nervous. Plus, it's a small venue, so if someone is there and just watching and not playing, it is pretty obvious and can make people feel pressured or self-conscious.

It probably took us being active in the LS for a couple years before we felt completely comfortable at hotel room parties.

Mayhem, you are 100% right. it is expensive to go for a weekend, and there are never any guarantees. It is however a bit different than going to a club only because they have rooms right there. It is similar to going to any other resort with rooms and a club in that you are going for the experience and for us its usually a mini vacation so we just prefer to do it with no kids around and a bunch of other naked people.

Back on topic, We are considering a cruise in the near future and we are a bit nervous about it as similar to the conversation about $$ it is a large investment not knowing IF we will find others that are interested in us that we are also interested in.

Off topic, but from SC - "...even with the increased $$ they still were sold out for the weekend. "

They do it because they can, plain and simple. So long as they have plenty of people lined up willing to pay, they'll keep doing it.

At that Secrets place, even WE might be nervous, but it would be nervous about possibly wasting a bunch of money and not getting to play. There is something about the way I'm wired where that would just bug me to my core if that happened, so we'd very likely be a hard pass.

It has less to do with the money wasted than it does feeling like someone profited from using/exploiting us. For that kind of money, you might as well just pay a professional once in a while. At least that's a sure thing.

Secrets raised their pricing just before Covid. We were there last just before we moved out of Florida and even with the increased $$ they still were sold out for the weekend. We have not been back since our move almost 2 years ago now, but are looking forward to another visit.

TallMark45

At Trapeze, I don't know.

At Secrets, I know that they were low enough last year that I actually made a reservation. Until they called me to tell me that because the night I reserved was part of some big party weekend, so there was now a two night minimum. And oh, by the way, the price per night for the room went up, as well as SM admission prices.

Thanks but no thanks.

Hedo is great. There are the occasional creepy guys - the only one I met was married and easily waved off - but it's not a setting that encourages creepy behavior. Singles do pay a premium if they don't want to share a room, but it's universally applied. That means that unlike places that have predatory pricing for single guys that pretty much ensures problems - because if you pay that much money, somebody had better be jumping on your dick - everyone is on an even footing. Anyway, it's a safe place whether you just want to hang out naked or bang someone new three times a day or just meet new people and get to know them.

"I will volunteer to hold your hand, if it will help calm your nerves."

Good to know. ;-)

What were the fee's prior to covid?

SCswingingCpl

Stayed in Atlanta last night, and thought about going to the Trapeeze for Newbie Thursday. $100 membership plus $100 to get in. Yet SMS are “valuable “ to the club experience.

DB yep we have been to Secrets many times. We always have a good time, but have found more of the married men simply dont know how to behave in that type of environment. Has left us hesitant from making the trip to Hedo, but we are looking at booking a trip soon...

SCswingingCpl

Like Secrets in Kissimmee, that claims to be Single Male friendly.

$169 for a one month membership, $199 to get in, and if I want a room, another $150.

If I’m going to lay down that kind of $$$, they better treat me like Caligula at a Roman orgy

Just getting to meet and connect with someone at a party usually makes that transition from "nervous" to "excitement". The nervousness may well be worry about fitting in then the later excitement is when they realize they may actually get to play.

We sometimes allow a new person/couple to attend a small party (10 people or less), but very rarely ever for a big party. We have the parties for our fun too, so really don't have time to get to know someone new at a large party.

Mahem, we have been doing our own as well. We dont charge but have been having people bring a dish for the food/snack table. Us and our co-host couple usually always supply the main entre, and all mixers and such. We have been averaging 10-20 couples as we believe this is a great number to ensure there are no issues amongst the group. There are only three venues we still go to outside of our own anymore and even then its only for special parties that they host. At our last party we did invite one single male at the request of a couple to be their 3rd. I must say he fit in with the group well and everyone enjoyed having him there. As a rule anymore we tend to try to meet "NEW" couples prior to an invite to the party to ensure they will fit, and answer any questions they may have. We figured what it cost us to host our own party is about what it would cost for a night out at another venue. We have had "NEW" couples just come to a party and you could see how nervous they were, and for many, and thankfully went away with a us walking them around showing them where everything is, and introducing them to everyone there. We have had a few show us and leave after just a few minutes as it was just not what they were expecting, and we totally understood. This is why when doing parties like these its important to meet new people outside of the party maybe more one on one to help ease the nerves.

SC - "...but then again there are too many who are just in this for the $$ rather than the true enjoyment of others."

That is exactly why we started having our own parties. They are by invitation only, and are free. Another downside of charging that can happen is that some people feel they are owed something at a party. Particularly SMs that pay a premium. The worst is that they expect things from other guests, that also paid to be there. It's not like there are prostitutes at the parties.

More often than not, parties that charge will be more about the money than anything. While they say they want you to have a good experience, I feel that is more so that you will come back and spend more money than it is about your good time.

While I don't begrudge someone from making a little something for their time/effort, it will be very difficult to compete with a free party where everyone is very close in what they are looking for. Just having an open invite alone is going to make that near impossible.

DB, we dont tolerate that behavior from anyone at our parties. As hard as it is to tell a couple with a smoking hot wife who enjoys fucking everyone at the parties, we have.... IF more venues adopted these same rules of male behavior for all I do think we would see a totally different atmosphere, but then again there are too many who are just in this for the $$ rather than the true enjoyment of others.

The wife has the hubby by the balls and bank acct. Other females don't have that power.

GOODGOLLYMSMOLLY

I will volunteer to hold your hand, if it will help calm your nerves.

ScSwingingCpl

That was really my point!

Some of the married males are pigs. If I were to do some of the stuff they do, I would be shown the door. But because they are part of a couple, it's ok.

DB, love the comment but married men can.... we have seen first hand that there are more married men who are creepy or handsy lately. We have been hosting couples parties and a few of them have asked about bringing in a few single males. What supprised me was the reason one wife gave. Ahe said she didnt mind fucking her husband because she was atupid enough to marry him, but she surely would not expext anyone else to... made me laugh soo hard... she keeps a tigjt leash on him when they are out.

They don’t have me blocked. (Puffing out chest)

DB - The whole "guys masturbating while watching us" thing kind of freaked me out when we first started going to LS parties. Then, I had a woman start rubbing herself while watching us one time and it gave me a whole new perspective on things ;-)

TallMark, if it's any consolation, they blocked me too.

If I’m attending an event at a new club or with a group I’ve never been with before, most definitely. Mostly because of the prevailing attitude towards single males, and me having to prove I don’t fit the stereotype.

For instance, I was reading the description for an event I might attend next month. It specifically says “Single males are not to expose themselves, or act creepy in any way.” But married males can?

With a pre-arranged meetup with a new couple or female, yes, but not quite as much. I’m usually worried about doing something that would make me look like a complete stooge.

Where as with established play partners, they already know I’m a stooge, and just accept it.