It all started when Lukas read through some posts about cuckolding on Reddit, and what he read made him quite upset. Instead of spending his time arguing online he decided to email Venus with his frustrations. He wrote about how experienced bulls and cucks are destroying the expectations of what cuckolding is really about, and that prospective new couples see this as the norm yet are unknowingly being misled. So what is this hot mess of misinformation that s going on? Have a listen to the episode to find out.LinksLukas on Fetlife - Lukas39Reddit - https://www.reddit.com/r/CuckoldPsychology/Join the QQ community for free limited access - https://www.venuscuckoldress.com/offers/FTNWndiv/checkout The Venus Blog - https://www.venuscuckoldress.com/blog?tag=venus Venus on GTFO radio - https://gtforadio.ca/shows-a/venus-cuckoldress/ All other links - https://linktr.ee/venuscuckoldress ❤️Venus Connections❤️ - Matchmaking for loving cuckolding relationships and female-led relationships. Learn more at https://www.venusconnections.com/ 👑♠️ Maison De Neige is high end lifestyle and streetwear fashion with a passion for the beauty of interracial combined with high fashion. Visit https://www.maisondeneige.com/ ❤️xoafterglow.com❤️ Meet the platform for ethical porn. Made by women, for women (and everyone). We make and share videos that portray sex accurately and treat performers with dignity, because nothing is sexier than consent. Use code VENUS for a free 7 day trial at ➡️ https://afterglow.ubpages.com/venus/Support the showDestination Links for Venus - https://lnk.bio/VenusPodcast
Transcript
Hey, are you looking for a hot wife? Maybe you're looking for a cuckold relationship. Then you need to join Venus Connections matchmaking service. It's totally private, it's fun blind dates, and all members are vetted. And it works. There was even a wedding last year and there'll be another one next year. It's definitely hard to find your life partner. I know. And it's even harder to find this kind of relationship. But you'll never win the lottery if you don't buy a ticket, right? So join VenusConnections.com. That's VenusConnections.com. And find the relationship of your dreams.
Here's what's coming up on the show. I think these online forums have a lot to answer for. We've talked before about Reddit. I've gone on there a few times now. And there's a few cuckold subs that you can read through. And there seems to be an awful lot of interaction between cucks and bulls and what they're going to do to each other and not many women on there being part of it. And to me, cuckolding is about Thank you.
there seems to be an awful lot of interaction between cucks and bulls and what they're going to do to each other and not many women on there being part of it and to me cuckolding is about empowering the woman there are potential cuckolds out there who realize that's the lifestyle they want to live they try and bring their partner to it and she reluctantly often agrees to read up and explore it and then she jumps onto one of these forums and it's all about her husband's bisexual fantasy that's the picture she gets you know those forums reflect nothing like he's promised her the lifestyle will be hot mess is the only word to describe it i went on this uh forum once and you know there were comments like uh a bull wrote i can walk in the room and the minute he sees my bulge i know i can just cock slap him across the face with it and then it was just someone under that saying oh i'd let you cock slap me across the face and you know and it just continued on and on with you know and the other one I really don't get is all this conversation of I make the cuck suck my cock or I fuck the cuck up the ass I don't enjoy it I do it to assert my domination and I'm like oh please please this is the venus cuckoldress podcast a place to learn all things cuckolding for the curious for the passionate and for the sexually empowered woman who wants it all.
Welcome to the show, everyone. I'm your host, Venus. Thank you so much for joining me for this, well, very interesting episode that I have going on today. My guest is from Australia. He emailed me with some concerns, some concerns about, let's just call it a dumpster fire, hot mess of misinformation, perceptions, and assumptions that are being made online in forums that are really hurting the lifestyle. So listen up, because beware, I think we can do a lot better. Okay, before we get started, I have a few announcements as per usual.
The first one, this is so awesome, you guys, the Venus blog is back. It's been gone for like, I don't know, a year and a half, maybe two years, something like that. It's been gone for a while. I used to have a big blog before I started podcasting, and then I added to it along the way after podcasting, and then I had it taken down for a while. And there's also the Goddess Worshipper blog that is on the Venus Cuckoldress website. But now there is the Venus blog as well. So it's back.
All the archives are back and as well as the most recent articles, including one that I just posted on my Twitter called The Sexually Empowered Woman Who Wants It All. Make sure you check it out. Go to venuscuckoldress.com. Just click on the tab that says the Venus blog. Oh, oh yeah, I almost forgot. I'm also looking for anyone who wants to contribute to the blog. So if you have something that you would like to write about that you think would be a great fit for the Venus blog, please just send an email to teamvenus at venuscuckoldress.com.
I know it's a long email, but feel free to rewind and replay that, teamvenus at venuscuckoldress.com. And who knows, maybe your article will get published on venuscuckoldress.com. Okay. Also, GTFO Radio, The radio show I do once a month live. I'm going to be doing that on April 16th. It's a Tuesday. My guest will be Oliver. He's been on the show before. He's such a wonderful guest. And make sure you check the link in the show notes for today so that you can mark your calendar and listen in live on the 16th.
Last but not least, I don't know if you've heard this or not, but recently I have opened up some limited free access to the Queen's Quarters community. And it's such an awesome place to be able to hang out, chat, talk to other people, make some new friends. There's also live meetups that I do on there. I just did one with Crystal Welch. It was super fun. So it is free. You can just sign up and the link is in the show notes for today. And it will be where I will announce something really spectacular that I'm working on. It's such a big announcement.
I'm so excited to be able to tell you, but I can't tell you yet. So make sure you sign up for that free access to the community. And when I can tell you, which will hopefully be soon, it's going to be awesome. Just take my word for it. Okay, that's it for announcements. Let's jump into the show. Here we go. All right. I have a special guest with me on the show today. He goes by the name of Lucas, and he is one half of a cuckold FLR couple from Australia.
And he's a full-time submissive to his partner, Elise, and their domination and submission is exclusive to them, meaning bulls don't play a dominant role in their lives. So we're going to talk about that. She usually plays alone or with him with an earshot and cuckolding is simply another tool in her domination over him. This sounds like a really fascinating, unique dynamic. So welcome to the show, Lucas. I'm happy to have you here. Say hello to all the listeners. Thank you very much for having me and thank you to all the listeners that are listening. Hello. This is a really cool episode.
I'm excited for this because you sent me an email and you were online. I think it's on Reddit. You were fired up about something. There was something that had you fired up and you're like, oh, I can't stand this. This is pissing me off. This is, I think you called it a hot mess of misinformation that's out there. And so, and I think it's like good on you for emailing me instead of just bickering back and forth, arguing with people on Reddit, because like you now, but now we can talk about it. Now we can be like, okay, like this is what's going on and have like a huge wide audience.
So good for you. That's pretty ballsy. Yeah. Yeah. Cool. Cool. So before we get into that hot mess of misinformation that's out there, let's talk about your dynamic and your relationship and how it started, how it evolved and where it's at today. Well, we've been together 16 years, started out very vanilla. We just gradually grew into an FLR, I think, over time. I couldn't pinpoint when it started, but we just grew into it. And then the cuckolding flowed as a result of chastity, which each built on the next. And here we are today in this full 24-7 FLR cuckold relationship.
And it's the most deep and loving relationship I've ever been in. So you started out in an FLR. How did it go from that, you said, to chastity? So there was some sexual denial. Yeah. Then it is a bit of a jump into cuckolding because then you're, you know, involving non-monogamy within your relationship who brought that up and who initiated that change look I'm sure it was me as it always is but uh I think over time she started to realize that if I was kept denied I was a much better submissive partner her only issue with keeping me denied was that she didn't want to miss out on sex.
And that was her big roadblock. That makes sense. partner. Her only issue with keeping me denied was that she didn't want to miss out on sex. And that was her big roadblock to chastity. So she's like, why would I want to lock you up? I still want to sleep with you. But over time, gradually, she started to see the advantages of keeping me denied.
And then she grew in confidence, I think, and decided, no, well, I don't have to have to have deny myself to deny him and so we've just gradually grown into this relationship here but she's a very dominant personality and hence why i see this frustration of um of seeing online how every bull seems to think that every cuckold relationship he's going to be the dom yeah if you know what i mean yeah it's it's very frustrating we're a full-time flr household and she runs the show there's no void for someone to come in and fill at the top right okay so you you have this power dynamic that's gone on in your relationship for a very long time, and she's not interested in being dominated by a bull.
She just wants partners to have great sex with, right? Exactly right. She wants a good fuck. Yeah, that's that. Okay, so I can totally understand why this is frustrating for you guys, because the stereotype is that cuckolds are submissive, that they look for a dominant bull. And maybe we can talk about like where those stereotypes come from and why they're so prevalent. But what has it been like for you guys to try to find guys, quote unquote, bulls for your wife? I'm sure you've come across a lot of assumptions that people make about you. What's that been like for you?
So we've had some great bulls over the years. They come in and it's her and them and I'm outside or I'm probably out taking the kids somewhere um and that's been great but then you get some that come in and they they're all about dominating the cuck as well and you know always saying to her you know let's bring him in and make him watch and it's just frustrating because she is like, well, you're here for me.
See, I've heard other versions of this, but the opposite where like people find a bull, a couple will find a bull and he doesn't want to involve, like he's not interested in the cuck at all. He's just, and it annoys some couples who do want to have the cuck involved. Oh, but this is my this is my main frustration right every couple's different and a good bull when he comes into the room reads the room yeah rather than just assuming he's going to run the room because sometimes that's what they want and a lot of people i've that's not what they want. Yeah.
And I will say that it is quite common among just regular cuckolding couples. And I'm not talking about what you see in porn, but I'm just talking about everyday people who are involved with cuckolding as just a spicy part of the bedroom stuff that they've got going on, that it lot of the times is like that so that is pretty common um and i so i can definitely understand how frustrating it would be to come across guys who don't even take that into consideration they just think that they understand what is portrayed in porn i guess is that where you think that the stereotypes are coming from?
I definitely do. I think these online forums have a lot to answer for. We've talked before about Reddit. I've gone on there a few times now. And there's a few cuckold subs that you can read through.
And there seems to be an awful lot of interaction between cucks and bulls and what they're going to do to each other and not many women on there being part of it and to me cuckolding is about empowering the woman my partner is empowered by the fact she cuckolds me and when the cuck and the bull start having a sexual relationship to me that's not empowering the woman it's something else altogether it's fine it's great if that's what you want to do. But to me, that's not cuckolding. That's become more of a poly type situation with dominance and submission as the theme. If you know what I mean.
Yeah. Yeah. The listeners can't see this, but I'm sitting here just nodding my head, smiling, going, yep. Actually, it was for myself really frustrating in the beginning to realize how much this is a male-driven fantasy for a lot of guys and how much we as women are missing in the conversations. And therefore, there's nobody really to fill in the blanks except for dudes online.
So they all chiming in and giving advice and and uh and answering questions and stuff like that just because there's just no women there the women are not there to to participate in those conversations and so you yeah you do end up getting uh some really oh my god i have heard of the worst fucking advice given online where i'm like what the actual fuck is going on here like yeah you guys just need to like stop because this is really not going to be good for your relationship and i guarantee you she's not going to appreciate that. And like, just stop. And so I totally get that.
But the online spaces are not very friendly and welcoming in general for women. From my experience, they're just not. No. And my frustration is born out of the fact that there are potential cuckolds out there who who realize that's the lifestyle they want to live they try and bring their partner to it and she reluctantly often agrees to read up and explore it and then she jumps onto one of these forums and it's all about her husband's bisexual fantasy that's the gets, you know. Those forums reflect nothing like he's promised her the lifestyle will be. And sometimes it's a legitimate promise.
Sometimes, unfortunately, it's probably a stepping stone into getting into that relationship. But either way, any female reading that stuff's just going to go, no, not for me. Yes. One of my very first episodes, I think it was like one of the first 10 episodes I ever did was called The Ugly Side of Cuckolding Popularity. And it was about that is because I do worry about what women are exposed to as their first impression of what this relationship really is.
If they go online, if they go and watch this porn, if they go onto these forums that are mostly men online and read and figure out like, what are they learning? What is their first impression? What are they going to assume about this lifestyle? It's unfortunate because it's not really reflective of what's really beneficial for women. And the relationship is all about the woman. The cuckold derives his pleasure from her pleasure most of the time, I think, in most couples anyway. And if it's not about her, for me, it would be empty. I think there would be no enjoyment in this.
Yeah, I love that you say that. So what exactly are they saying online? Like, where did this come from? Do you remember some of the comments? Like, what was it? Hot mess is the only word to describe it.
I went on this forum once and, you know, there were comments like, a bull wrote, I can walk walk in the room and the minute he sees my bulge i know i can just cock slap him across the face with it and then it was just someone under that saying oh i'd let you cock slap me across the face and you know and it just continued on and on with you know and the other one i really don't get is all this conversation of i make the cuck suck my cock or i fuck the cuck up the ass i don't enjoy it i do it to assert my domination and i'm like oh please please but but this is and the frustration too is that you know we've come such a long way in the world with gay and bisexuality and everything, and cuckolding has such a stigma.
Yet, for some reason online, some of these people prefer to use the cuckolding thing as an excuse to explore the gay and bi thing, which is almost an everyday thing now that's normal and accepted. Yet, people sit there wanting to say, you know, I do it only because I have to. Yeah, yeah. I called them backpack cucks. This was the single guys who I came across, who would come across on these sites online who would immediately just unload all of their wants from their backpack. I want you to make me suck the bull's cock. I want you to make me wear panties and I want all this stuff.
Let me, and I said in the episode, like, okay, as a single woman interested in learning about this kind of relationship, that's overwhelming.
And that is a bit of a, like, it's a bit bit wild okay for for anybody who's starting at like step one it's a bit wild i mean maybe if you're like kinky as fuck at eight out of ten woman it's not gonna phase you but for most women who maybe their partners just brought this up to them or whatever or whatever they're curious to learn that's gonna to be a bit much and you're right there are there are a lot of guys out there who think oh i would love to explore this you know side of me i find it really hot thinking about that fantasy where i'm forced to do these things and suck the bull off and stuff like that for a lot of guys i think all, this kind of relationship would be great for that.
I rarely ever get couples or singles as guests for this show who want to talk about being bisexual in a cuck role. I rarely get people who want to talk about it on the show. They're usually too shy. um but went and I rarely ever go on Reddit because I inherited a stalker from there really bad a few years ago. But I went on there this morning because I was like, I'm going to poke my head around in here and see what's going on.
And there was some interesting conversations, but there was, I was surprised at how many conversations there are on there about the forced by aspect of cuckolding which is i found interesting because like i just don't see people talk about that a lot in other spaces and so this is definitely something where like people go to reddit to be able to talk about that and is it yeah is it just wank material that they're going for i'm assuming oh 100 shocker but but that's that's the problem isn't it because a vanilla person wanting to learn about the lifestyle they're not going to jump straight to fetlife they're going to go to reddit which is a fairly vanilla platform across the board and they're met with this hardcore bisexual domination stuff and they almost immediately are going to just shut down you know and it's it's weird and you can you can never control what's on social media it's i think the only thing we is get the word out there.
I mean, FLR and cuckolding is a really loving dynamic where boundaries are pushed, but everyone's boundaries are respected. And it's not for someone else. Often it's not for someone else to come in and try and control the relationship. Yeah, I think it's important to have balance when it comes to messaging about this kind of relationship. And that's why I get upset about, you know, the like places, spaces like Twitter and stuff where Fyndom has really adopted cuckolding as like, oh, this is a great way to make money.
And I'm just gonna push the hardcore abuse and degradation of cucks and and get more money i you know there's a space for that you know go for it be do that you know if that turns you on to go for it i'm okay with that but the fact that is so imbalanced that that messaging is so loud because it's just so massive there that it i worry about yeah woman going on there and wanting to learn about cuckolding and that's what she sees oh no like that's gonna be bad honestly in a world where we really need to educate people about a well-rounded approach to cuckolding like it's not just this one extreme version it is it is a beautiful like spectrum of dynamics within couples that is unique to each couple and evolves all the time and so um having that kind of balance is important i remember i went online a long time ago there was this cuckold chat room and i was like oh my god yes this sounds awesome like we're gonna have a chat it's gonna be there's gonna be people talking about cuckolding like this sounds great this is right when I was like just learning about it and stuff I went in there holy fuck Lucas oh my god it was such a disappointment all it was was this like really fast scroll of people posting pics and memes and it was wank off material is all it was there was no conversation going on at all it was bulls just trying to be ultra dominant really like just basically at you know and then cucks just asking to be humiliated and stuff.
I was like, what the actual fuck is this? Yeah, and that's the thing.
Like, I was talking to my partner about this not so long ago, and I said, you know, when you see a bull, we go through this whole ritual almost of the night before before i i'll groom her and do her nails eyebrows if she needs or whatever it is she wants and then on the day she will get up and shower and do her makeup and put on lingerie imagine going through all that to have the bulwark in the room and stick his cock in the cuck's mouth she while she she's lying on the bed there going what am I it just just doesn't feel like it's empowering her at all and you know it's not why women want to come to this I'm speaking generally of course there'll be some that enjoy that but it surely can't be the reason that women want to try this lifestyle We'll be right back.
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yeah it's definitely not something that pops up right in the beginning the whole bisexual aspect of some couples usually happens um gradually that this is something that they decide they want to maybe try or go down that road and see what it's like it's not usually straight out of the gate like let's uh do this like okay like we're we're monogamous and vanilla one moment and the next moment um she's gonna make me wear panties and i'm gonna suck off the ball like it just doesn't go that way no no and that's the message that needs to get out there that a lot of c cuckold couples are very, very straight and some are bi and they're both fine, but the role of the bull is to know which one he's with and to perform his role as the third in that setting.
And I think it's his responsibility to do so. Yeah, yeah.
That is his role, but he has a responsibility to understand the unique dynamic that this couple is in and if he makes the decision to you know engage with that that it's his responsibility to play within that dynamic and not make assumptions um that's important for a lot of guys who understand this kind of cuckolding thing but let's face it there's just a lot of guys out there looking for pussy that are just like sure cuckolding i'll sign up whatever and they are just going to base their uh whole expectations around what they see online in that forum where it says i can walk in and i can smack his face with my dick and blah and like we are setting we're setting these guys up for failure if we if we are not being clear about the messaging like you know this is yeah we're playing fantasy talk right now you know know?
Yeah, yeah, exactly, exactly. And, you know, that time at the start, the bull really needs to just take a moment to have a frank discussion with the couple about what their lifestyle is. Yeah. Are they looking for a dominant to come in? Okay, I can fill that role. Or are they just wanting a lover for her? I can fill that role. Absolutely. And I think that for experienced couples who already have established their dynamic, their boundaries, and what they're comfortable with and what they're not, it's easier probably for them to articulate that.
But for a lot of couples, this is very new and they don't really know yet. And there is this, I think the fantasy of cuckolding is that everything's just going to fall into place. And this is going to be a mind blowing experience. And everything's just going to work out so hot. And we don't even think about that unsexy conversation that you have to have first, like, what do you want this to look like?
And what do you like to what do you like to do what do you not want to do like all of those between all three people so all these poor couples who and i read about them some of them on reddit were like all nervous about this is going to be my first time and blah or i had we had our first time and it didn't go as we planned or because all shit went sideways and stuff. And I'm like, man, there's so much room for error here. We really do need to be like, okay, hold up. Like this is a fun fantasy and everything like that. But you have to have these conversations ahead of time.
I know it doesn't seem fun and sexy and you might not know the answers to all the questions that somebody's going to ask but this is what you need to do beforehand the bull plays a big role in that like he has to he he can't just walk in especially for a brand new couple just walk in and be like i'm just gonna wing it yeah yeah exactly right exactly right there's a fair bit of psychology, I guess. He needs to be a bit of a psychologist to sort of be able to understand the dynamic and know how to fit into it.
But that's what makes a bull a really good bull, is that they are so fascinated by the psychology of this dynamic and so curious to learn about this dynamic that's what separates a guy that just wants pussy and a really good bull yeah and they they love that role because of that they just you know dive right into that role it's fascinating to them and they That's how they feel fulfilled. Just like how I feel fulfilled being in the role of a cuckoldress in that scenario. Like it's everything for me. I enjoy the psychology of it. It's the same for a cuck, I'm assuming. Oh, a hundred percent.
I mean, it's all about the psychology, really. Okay. So what needs to change right now? It's a hot mess of information out there. What do you think needs to happen to kind of make some positive change with this? I think we just need more positive messaging. It's impossible to rein in the internet. That's never going to happen.
That misinformation is always going to be be out there but people who are in happy cuckolding flr lifestyle need to speak up even if it's anonymously online but be heard because they'll they'll all tell you it's a beautiful lifestyle and we love it but you know they stay away from those those forums because it's just overrun with fantasy people um people i think they need to to get out there, be anonymous if you need to be, but just get out there and get the message out that it is a beautiful form of a relationship. And very unique to each person. 100%. Yeah, totally, totally unique.
I think that there's absolutely room and space for all of the wank material and the seeking out the wank material and the consuming all of the wank material that's out there when it comes to cuckolding. There's space for that. But when you intermingle it with real conversations, that's where we get this like real, I don't know what's, you know, like where people can get the wrong interpretation of what's happening.
So having spaces where you can have real talk about cuckolding with real couples, women included, where it is not going, where the women are not going to be, you know, bombarded with messages from guys who just want to wank off or, you know, all of that. If there's a safe place for women to be able to go and have these conversations, I think that would be so beneficial. I think what you've had to say here is so important and it's just really great. I'm glad that you've reached out to me to have this discussion because you're right. This is not something that we see properly portrayed online.
For a lot of couples, it's just not resonating. And for a lot of single or women who are learning about this, this is potentially really detrimental misinformation and stereotypes that are not going to be serving these women and their potential experiences. So I'm really glad that you reached out. I will be checking out the Reddit threads a little bit more now. There's one called Cuckold Psychology, which sounds really promising. And it's probably where any prospective cuckoldress would go for information, just given the title. And that's where my frustrations came out of, that thread.
I will post the link to that in the show notes for today. Is there anywhere where people can learn more about you or potentially contact you? FetLife, Lucas39, Lucas with a K, not a C, 39. That's pretty much my inbox is open. Well, thank you so much for coming on the show today. I really appreciate it. Do you have any last thoughts or words of advice that you want to give right before we say goodbye? Yeah, look, I just reiterate that to the bulls out there, the new bulls particularly, just take the time to learn the dynamic of the relationship that you're becoming a part of.
And for the cucks out there, try to focus on what it is that your cuckoldress needs for that relationship to work well and if everyone did that we'd be in a very good space absolutely i agree all right lucas thank you so much for coming on the show today no problem venus thank you for having me thanks for joining today. Make sure you go to venuscuckoldrist.com. That's where you can book a private chat with me. You can check out any cuckolding events that might be happening.
And you can even ask a question for the show, as well as, of course, join the Queen's Quarters Fan Club and get all the benefits for that. You can also follow me on Instagram, the Venus Cuckoldrist Podcast. I haven't been banned there. Well, I have, but not recently. I don't know. I, the Venus Cuckoldris podcast. I haven't been banned there. Well, I have, but not recently. You can also follow me on Twitter or whatever the fuck you want to call it. My handle is at Cuckoldris V. That's it for today. We'll see you next time.
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