Ruby joins the show to share her story of embracing the cuckolding lifestyle from the onset of her relationship with her now husband, including a fresh lens on open communication and shared desires. Unlike many who weave these dynamics in later, her story reveals the power of honesty and compatibility from the start. LinksRuby s Twitter: https://x.com/LifeOfaHotwifeRead Venus s contribution to the Savage Love Column - https://mailchi.mp/savage.love/jan011325-column?e=a0d21cabdbJoin the 2 Week Locked-In Love Challenge with Venus Key Barrett, MSc - https://www.venuscuckoldress.com/offers/FTNWndiv/checkoutJoymode: GREAT SEX SOLVED, NATURALLYUse Code VENUS for 20% off your first order at tryjoymode.com/venus🚀 Support your erection quality💪 Perform with confidence❤️Venus Connections❤️ - Matchmaking for loving cuckolding relationships and female-led relationships. Learn more at https://www.venusconnections.com/ 👑♠️ Maison De Neige is high end lifestyle and streetwear fashion with a passion for the beauty of interracial combined with high fashion. Visit https://www.maisondeneige.com/ ❤️xoafterglow.com❤️ Meet the platform for ethical porn. Made by women, for women (and everyone). We make and share videos that portray sex accurately and treat performers with dignity, because nothing is sexier than consent. Use code VENUS for a free 7 day trial at ➡️ https://afterglow.ubpages.com/venus/Support the showDestination Links for Venus - https://lnk.bio/VenusPodcast
Transcript
Hey, are you looking for a hot wife? Maybe you're looking for a cuckold relationship. Then you need to join Venus Connections matchmaking service. It's totally private, it's fun blind dates, and all members are vetted. And it works. There was even a wedding last year and there'll be another one next year. It's definitely hard to find your life partner. I know. And it's even harder to find this kind of relationship. But you'll never win the lottery if you don't buy a ticket, right? So join VenusConnections.com. That's VenusConnections.com. And find the relationship of your dreams.
Here's what's coming up on the show. And he was like, you know, I would really kind of love if I had someone who just wanted to go out and just live like the lifestyle that you live, but just like come home to me. And I'm like, what do you mean? This is impossible.
and he he just like came in was like this is okay like you can do this and still be a great mother and still be a great co-worker and still be a great friend and still be a great partner and I could see her up thinking about it and still be a great you know all of that and still have this satisfaction and this connection that almost makes me feel almost sad like when i see other couples i'm like you should have this it was exhilarating it was very surreal and i truly i tell them to this day i like, I really don't think that you thought I would really do, like, go for this.
And so I told him, I was like, you know, we're going to set something up. We got a hotel room, and we found a couple people, and I mean, I just kind of let go of my inhibitions, and by the end of it, we both were like, yes, I want this. The look in his face, like when he's like, holy shit, this is happening. Like, you know, like, you know, just surrounded by you getting like immersed in all of this dick. And he's just like, holy shit.
This is the Venus Cuckoldressress podcast a place to learn all things cuckolding for the curious for the passionate and for the sexually empowered woman who wants it all let's go hello everybody welcome to the show i'm your host venus and this is season five of the venus cuckoldress podcast yes it's been five years since i launched this show. I kind of launched it on a whim. I didn't really think about it a lot. I was like, sure, I'm going to do this. And look at it now. It's amazing. It's one of the most popular shows, I think, in the world. And it just blows my mind.
It's been an amazing, amazing journey. So thank you so much for listening in and being a fan and joining me along this way.. So it's also marks this year marks 10 years since I first learned about cuckolding relationships and developed this passion for for talking about learning about this kind of relationship. So a decade has gone by and wow, I have learned so much. I continue to learn so much. Today's episode is another really interesting story. I have a woman by the name of Ruby who's joining the show. And her story is a little bit different, the story of her and her husband.
So most of the time when I talk to couples who are into cuckolding, they've been married together for a long time and then one day decided that they were going to go down this road together and try out cuckolding. But that's not the case with this couple. This couple kind of dove right into it from the get-go, that this was something that they talked about and decided to do right in the beginning. And then, of course, decided that things were great and they were going to get married and they've been married now for a little while and their relationship is evolving.
But I think that is so interesting and so unique. And I don't know a lot of couples who've done it that way. So I hope it's a trend. I hope that this is more of a thing that people can be open and honest about their desires right in the beginning when they first meet somebody and decide if they're compatible that way. Who knows? But anyway, it's a great episode for singles and couples to have a listen to. Lots of great perspective, lots of great advice. And for the guys, pay attention to the way that he brought this up to her because I found this really, really interesting.
Before we get started, I just have a couple of announcements. The first one being the two-week Locked in Love Chastity Challenge. I've done this challenge with Key Barrett each year for a few years now, and it is so much fun. So it starts on February 1st, it ends on Valentine's Day, February 14th. And this is a special challenge for couples who have maybe thought about doing chastity, maybe talked about it or are curious to learn about it. This is your opportunity to really give it a try and see how it goes. So if you want to participate, you can join us in the Queen's Quarters community.
That's on venuscuckoldress.com. The link, if you want to join, is in the show notes for today. It's free. And there's a place in there where in that community where you can be chatting about it with others as well and key barrett who is the author of one of my absolute favorite books called locked in love and he is going to be doing some live chats with me that's going to be february 3rd and february 10th they're both mondays and that'll be happening at 6 p.m pacific time time, that's 9pm Eastern.
And that's going to happen in the Queen's quarters, there'll be a link where you can join us for that for those live chats, we're going to be talking about how it's going in the two week chastity challenge, and we'll be there to help answer any questions that you might have. And you can share how it's going for you at that time. And on February 1st, so mark your calendars for this one. You're not going to want to miss the show on that day, because on February 1st, I have a special chastity episode that's going to be airing, and it's going to be with the founder of Kink 3D.
Kink 3D does the most amazing chastity cages. You've probably heard of them already. They're wildly popular and they have amazing chastity cages. So I have the founder of Kink 3D that's going to join me on the show and talk all about chastity. So don't miss that one airing on February 1st. If you belong to one of the Helpful Cuck or Friends with Benefits tiers on venuscuckoldress.com to support the show, then you will get access, early access to that episode that normally comes out on February 1st. You'll get a few days earlier.
And last but not least, big shout out to Dan Savage for giving me the opportunity to chime in on his hugely popular sex advice column savage love i wrote a little piece about cuck angst and so i'm always so happy to be a part of that so thank you dan for that i'll put a link to it in the show notes for today i don't know if you guys know but um way back in 2009 that's when i was reading savage love every thursday in an office with a bunch of girls. And we would read this, we'd sit around the lunch table and we would read Savage Love in the Georgia Strait newspaper.
And that's how I learned about kink and non-monogamy, like basically hugely opened my eyes to things that I had no idea even existed. And that was really the beginning of the journey for me to learn about different kinds of relationships. So thank you, Dan, for that, because I wouldn't be here doing this today if it wasn't for you. Okay, that's it for announcements. Let's get into the show after this quick message. It's that time of year where people are making all kinds of resolutions. But the one that should be on your list, I know it's on mine, is having better sex.
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Simply mix with six to eight ounces of water 45 minutes before sexual activity and watch the magic unfold. Redefine your intimacy in 2025. Have better sex. Go to tryjoymode.com for 20% off with the code VENUS. That's 20% off and free shipping with the code VENUS at tryjoymode.com. That's ingredients with integrity. It's joy mode. Okay, joining me on the show, I have such a wonderful guest. I'm really excited about this. Her name is Ruby and she is a queen of spades cuckoldress and she's here to share her story. Say hello to all of the listeners, Ruby. Hello. It's good to be here. Yeah.
I'm so excited to have you share your story because like I've talked to a lot of guys, but I don't always get the opportunity to talk to a lot of women to get the female perspective. And so I'm so excited to have you share your story on the show. So let's dive into it. You are married, right? How long have you been married for? Yes, two years. Okay. And how long have you known each other for? Well, we've had mutual friends. So we really kind of knew of each other for longer than we've known each other. But I would say probably closer to three, we really dove right into it. Okay.
And how did this all start with you guys? Well, I was kind of living more of a promiscuous lifestyle at the time. I wasn't very shameful, but I wasn't very bold and proud. I hadn't explored any of this type of dynamic before, but I really was just kind of doing my own thing. And he was kind of the initiator. Actually, we kind of just talked a little bit through social media. And before we knew it, he was like, you know, I would really kind of love if I had someone who just wanted to go out and just live like the lifestyle that you live, but just like come home to me.
And I'm like what do you mean this is impossible this sounds like a dream and he was like well you know maybe it's not and I'm like well you know maybe it's not here we are um four years later so we really just uh we kind of talked for a few months and we ended up meeting on Halloween a few years ago. And I mean, it really just fell into place. Honestly, we both were our desires and our wants in all aspects, even outside of sexuality were very, very aligned.
So I feel like we've both been able to um, in this type of dynamic since then, as far as like discovering new things that we, you know, like and want to explore. So he brought this up right away when you guys were just, Oh, wow. That doesn't happen very often. How bold, right? Most guys are too scared. No, he is not scared not scared and I love that that is amazing so he wanted you this is so similar to like how I was introduced to it too because like my first boyfriend yeah I was on a dating app and I was like I have no intention of being monogogamous.
Like I'm not fucking one dick for the rest of my life. Yes, literally. I was like, I'm not settling for shit. And he was, he must've been like, oh, that sounds promising. Like maybe she would like this kind of relationship, right? And so he, he was like, he brought it up and that's how he kind of brought it up to me too, where he was like, I want you to still be able to live this life that you're living where you fucking all these dudes. And like, but I want to date you as well. And I was like, what? Right. Like, I'm just like, hold on.
Because see, the thing is, is if you ask any of my best friends, I've been saying this for years. I'm like, if only I could just have someone that could just love me and let me just do my own thing and just know like that they can be secure in that and I can still do my own thing like why can't why can't you and that was before I even knew that this type of relationship even existed and then whenever it was brought to me I was like this is a setup. This is suspicious. And so I kind of called his bluff. I was like, Oh, really? You think you can handle this? I love that so much.
Because that like the way that he way that that's introduced to a woman is not like in a very kink way. It's not a BDSM way. It's not. It has to almost be emotional. Yeah. It's not like I really want to watch you do this and do this to me. And I, I can't give you what you need. It's not objectifying. And I, I, I feel like that could be a common misconception that it's very easy for women specifically to feel objectified by kinky talk or this type of dynamic, like, like kink dispensing or something like that.
But if it happens to excite you, then maybe you should dig a little deeper and see if there's something there for you that's kind of stoking the fire, right? Yeah. So when, okay, so he brought this up to you and you were like, oh my God, like what's the catch? Truly. I was like, what's the catch? Yeah. That is such a common reaction that women have where they're like, this sounds too good to be true. It can't be real. Like when's the other shoe going to drop? Like once I actually do this, you're going to be like, hold up.
No, So I changed my mind and then I'm gonna be like oh my god you know and feel ashamed or something when I really shouldn't and I'm thankful that hasn't happened yeah I I mean maybe we just naturally as women we go we go there in our minds thinking like this is a trick like he must want to sleep with other women or something like that because it must have something to do with the fact that we're kind of programmed to think that like it everything has to be equal and fair so if you're getting this privilege of being able to have these other extra experiences with other people like it would be kind of mean to not allow your partner to do that.
It is mean to not allow your partner to do that. But that's kind of the fun of it, isn't it? I know. It's so funny you say that because I'm like, it's the unfairness of it. That's, that's hot.
And it's kind of like, it is like, I'm getting this and you're not kind of fun little that's a thing that's a thing for us that I'm getting this and you're not that's definitely a thing but at the same time it is so a two-way street like he's getting oh absolutely so much out of it even though he's somewhat denied well something that I've said I've said this for a very long time prior to this type of lifestyle i was a very submissive type of person in my sexuality as opposed to in this dynamic i'm much more dominant and i get to embody that side of my personality which is very very there i'm very outspoken i'm very bubbly and so i kind of took on more of the submissive um dynamic prior to and i've always told him the submissive truly has the power because they're the one that is giving that to you and if they say no you have to stop and so they're the ones that kind of hold that, that key to, to the door, you know, that of that expansion.
So it absolutely takes two and you have to be willing to take that opinion into all of it. So interesting that you said this kind of relationship has kind of brought out the more dominant side in you or and I found the same in my own experience it's truly divine it nurtures the empowerment within you yes gives you access to like a level of confidence I feel like it's brought me I feel like I've kind of been stuck at the door of this level of confidence and I could Thank you. Thank, this is okay.
Like you can do this and still be a great mother and still be a great coworker and still be a great friend and still be a great partner. And I could see her up thinking about it. And so be a great, you know, all of that and still have this satisfaction and this connection that almost makes me feel almost sad. Like when I see other couples, I'm like, you should have this. You just don't even know what you're missing out on y'all. Like, like my co workers anytime I mean, I have friends that, you know, they say certain things about like, you know, their relationships.
And Oh, he thinks I'm talking to this person. I'm like, could never be me. Y'all just don't know what y'all could have. And I don't I understand it's not for everyone. And I won't even say it takes a special person to do it because it's not that one is better than the other.
But it takes it takes a certain type of mindset to be able to have that level of trust and understanding and loyalty to be able to explore the other side and know okay this person is not going to love anyone else or betray me it's very multifaceted and it's a learning process yeah so interracial black and white the beautiful and sexy relationship dynamic that we love now in a lifestyle clothing brand you can wear with pride don't sacrifice quality and comfort any longer with maison dinege you get both in fresh empowering looks for every occasion for everyone, from the streets to the sheets and everywhere in between.
You guys jumped in right away.
This is fascinating to to me he brought this up right away but you started out as like the stag vixen dynamic i'm assuming because you said you were more on like the submissive nature side in the beginning and that's where your comfort zone was right which he does have a dominant side to him as well so in that way we can both kind of be a little switchy uh which i'm thankful for because there's times that we both cater to that certain side but overall i think he very much had an idea of how it was gonna go just based off of maybe my answers and maybe him having a better understanding of the lifestyle due to that being things that he wanted to explore you know maybe he had I think he had done a little bit more research than I had at that time but he was never pushy so you guys jumped in very quickly and um obviously this seemed to fit like who you are and what you enjoy and stuff like that.
But was there any downside to jumping in so quick together in the beginning of your relationship? Honestly, I really can't think of anything. And that's not to be too kind or anything. I'm really racking my brain. But I think that because the fact that him and I were so upfront and direct about what we were looking for, what excited us, what we were seeking with to bring out of ourselves and bring out within a partnership, I think we kind of evaded a lot of those negative aspects of it, which I know we're very lucky for.
Something I will say, which I feel like is probably a commonality is that I feel like we both have had like, are you sure that I'm not persuading you that this is what you want, that we're not, you know, pressuring each other. And we both are very much like, no, that's not the case. We would, we, I would tell you if I didn't want to do it, we very much have a, we can call this off at any time. Either one of us, if one of us said like, no, we're done, we're done. And that there's no question about it. Like what caused this? who did it, whose fault that's not the issue.
And I think that takes a lot of precedence and there not being negativities is we don't have a lot of who's to blame or who's the root of what we want to do this. And we are excited about it. And even though I though I'm the one that narrates how it goes necessarily, it's definitely a unified dynamic. I think that alleviates a lot of the negativities that you may find in this type of situation. What was it like when you first actually cucked him or like slept with another guy or whatever, like in your relationship together, what was that like for you? It was exhilarating. It was very surreal.
So our very first encounter was probably about a month after we actually met in person. We've been talking for a little while. We kind of had these ideas and I don't, I truly, I tell them to the same, like, I really don't think that you thought I would really do like go for this. And so I told him, I was like, you know, we're going to set something up. We got a hotel room. It was around, it was around Christmas time. It was in December, uh, about, uh, two or three years, three years ago.
And, you know, we got, we found a hotel room it was around it was around christmas time it was in december about uh two or three years three years ago and you know we got we found a couple people and there's like two or three people there and i mean i just i mean i just kind of let go of my inhibitions and by the end of it he we both were like yes i want this it was just i can't even explain it's hard to put put words to it I mean truly I fell in love with this man he was like you can have whatever you want and I'll love you for it and I mean just I don't I'm sure that there's other like hot wives and cuckoldresses that can um understand I'm sure you can like the look in a in his face like when he's like holy shit this is happening like this you know like he's you know just surrounded by you getting like immersed in all of this dick and he's just like holy shit and it's great was that his first time getting cucked ever or yes he had a girlfriend before oh yes yes wow yes so we both really he had these desires but he these desires were never acted upon or brought to life before we brought them to life so he likes to say there was very specific boxes that needed to be checked and I happened to check them oh so you got you guys popped each other's cuck cherry that's absolutely yes we did and afterwards I'm assuming like you felt that kind of cloud nine high together of like oh my gosh absolutely and I feel like it's something that we maintain which is amazing i feel like it has such a it brings such a closeness and such a connection that's very it's very deep it's it's a vulnerability that is not easy to do even though i may make it sound easy and you know it's like you know i'm laughing and and you know kind of chatting with you it's definitely vulnerable and it's like, you know, I'm laughing and, and, you know, kind of chatting with you.
It's definitely vulnerable. And it's not easy to say, okay, I'm gonna do this and just hope that they'll be okay with it, you know, and vice versa. So I think that it's definitely an exploration. Yeah, I felt I feel like the kind of vulnerability that you're talking about in within a cuckolding relationship is it feels as uncomfortable as like, if you could imagine like being emotionally naked in front of somebody, like quite literally. Yeah. Difficult, but like worth it, but absolutely worth it.
And I would, I would say say that any day all day to anyone that would listen yeah truly um it's it's something you know like you said it's not easy it takes some work and it takes some emotional vulnerability and kind of bearing it all but the, it's very fruitful.
Yeah now you guys you so you jumped in um stag vixen you've popped each other's cuck cherry you're just all in this is amazing this is great how has it evolved since then since then it's evolved to more of a one-sided open relationship um where we we pray we play um you know pretty regularly i would say at least once a month um as of right now sometimes there are intermittent breaks you know due to life in general um but we both have very much decided that we want to see where it goes and keep on exploring.
Um, so we've talked about going, um, you know, to different, um, um, like keto and like splash mocha, you know, different things like that and exploring, you know, deeper into the lifestyle, um lifestyle which i would love to do both of those things um very much so um but it really we're focused right now on just maintaining balance of of this aspect of our lives and our everyday lives that's that's probably what i would say is the most important to me currently is, is the balance, you know, making sure that all of those other sides are heard, but we still get to explore, you know, the fun side.
Yeah. I've heard that from a lot of couples, fairly new couples in the lifestyle, ones who really jump in, you know, headfirst with gusto and, but that you need that maintaining balance is a big challenge or it can be a big challenge and taking breaks is sometimes necessary. Um, and I get that. I mean, it is very fun. It is very thrilling, but it's only part of real life. So, right. Right.
Which, which we have explored, you know, multiple different multiple different dynamics as far as you know there was a time that we you know didn't we weren't really active and we you know were a little more celibate on both sides and really focused on what we wanted to grow within ourselves and each other outside of sexuality and then once we felt a little more secure in that You know, we felt comfortable to dive back in and that's really broadened, um, our horizons as far as, um, what I've done and encountered experiences that I've had, um, which is great.
Um, sorry, I was thinking I was reminiscing on new year's, which was quite fun. Did you have a really great time with somebody on New Year's? I did. I did. Multiple someones, actually. We ended up last minute getting a hotel room. And it was in the downtown area of a local city. They kind of have a firework show and, you know, kind of stuff going on.
And, you know, we hadn't gone out in a while so i was really excited i got all dressed up and um i have a regular friend who was actually there at the cherry popping uh he was actually the one of the first people that i was with um and and he's great we've really both become friends with him um and we got him to come out and um got someone else to come out. I mean, it was great. We've really both become friends with him. Um, and we got him to come out and, um, got someone else to come out. I mean, it was great. Uh, we definitely marked some, some checks off the bucket list. Oh my God.
That's awesome. Sometimes the most impromptu play sessions are the best. All right. Now you've decided to have only black men as your lovers. Is that correct? You're now a queen of space. That is correct. So was it like that from the beginning or no? No, it wasn't. I didn't really have a lot of preferences because I hadn't explored this dynamic. I was pretty open. And once we started exploring, it turns out I'm definitely a size queen. So black guys tend to fit the bill a little bit better. How did that happen? How did you move into becoming a queen of spades?
Was that something that you initiated that was your idea or was this something that your husband wanted? I would say it was very mutual. I can't, I don't know that I can really remember who initiated it. But I'm sure at one point or another, one of us had mentioned it. And I'm definitely a bigger is better type of lady. So I let him know that from the beginning, which I mean, he is not small by any means, but still, it's not the same. I get it. And so what how has that been for you?
I mean, other than just like size being, you know, your size queen, but like, how's that been for you just having black bulls? It's been very good. Um, I'm, I'm very sexual, so I love giving head.
I love oral I love receiving oral like I could be eaten out for hours like I absolutely love that so I love um I like a little bit of like the nasty freakiness and I can get that um a little bit more in that dynamic which I appreciate i i just feel like my inhibitions are a little a little more um they're not so tight on me they're a little more in the background whenever I feel like I can just kind of be myself and it not be so scrutinized I don't know maybe that's the Maybe that's part of the allure is that I find a lot of black bullies are really open to that dynamic of cucking another guy.
They kind of, they kind of get like a masculinity power trip out of it sometimes, which kind of turns me off. Yeah, I know what you mean.
And with a lot of the black guys that who I've met I've asked them like how come you really enjoy fucking white women and so many have said that it's because they it's the white women are just like so freaky and like so fun like they're like I can't get that with I've been told that that I'm like very fun and very freaky and I don't I don't necessarily feel like I'm out of the box per se but I guess I don't have much comparison I just do what seems fun and I mean maybe giving guys in the head in a parking lot across the street from the hotel is fun. Yep, I've been there too.
I can't believe this is my life. Living the dream. Really? You've obviously had the opportunity to really first to learn about this kind of relationship and it exists and then to experience it yourself and understand what the benefits have been for you and for your relationship. But it's what I have found to be a little bit disappointing in this lifestyle is how much of it is so male driven.
And like, so the female, not just the female perspective, but the female fantasy aspect of it is so male driven and like so the female not just the female perspective but the female fantasy aspect of the female desire part of it is so muted muffled or just not not existing and not spoken on yeah and so like what do you think needs to change or or like how how do we fix that because it's frustrating to me and it must be for you too. It is, it is frustrating to me. And I think a lot of it has to do with that feeling of security from your partner.
I think that's essential, which you've talked about before that women won't know about this. If you're not willing to kind of put it out there that this type of relationship is a possibility for them I would say that's definitely a integral aspect of me being willing to be in this type of dynamic or explore this type of relationship because I don't know that I would have ever felt so confident in the moment to say to a guy like, hey, how would you feel about this? So it definitely eases it some when the man kind of approaches it. But I understand how nerve wracking that can be.
I think us as, you know, cuckoldresses, hot wives in this lifestyle almost have a duty to be a little more outspoken about it to kind of help bridge the gap and let people say, okay, if I say this, it's not so bad. I can still be a good person, a good friend, a good parent, a good coworker, you know, et cetera, et cetera. And, but also I can still embrace this side of my sexuality that excites me and brings me to a deeper understanding of myself that I didn't think was possible. Everyone deserves that. And it, it's much deeper than just, oh, hot, kinky, dirty sex.
Like it's, that's not all of it. And I think that gets, you know, such a, a big screen over everything else and everything else just kind of falls to the preview status when really it's not the case. All of that, that background is essential to being able to explore that so I think us just being you know able and willing to talk about it and share it and say hey you could explore this and there are people out there that like this and you know you don't have to settle is really the way yeah you can have your cake and eat it. If that's what you want and what you would enjoy.
I know what you mean. I, and I love the fact that you said that we kind of have a duty to be able to have to be more loud about this than the, than the guys, because we're just muffled or like, it's just quiet out there when it comes to the women. But I would say women are killing it on only plans when it comes to cuckolding stuff. Like in that aspect, women are loud and it is out there and that is great and everything like that.
But when it comes to having these real kind of honest discussions about what it's been like for, you know, the less shiny, less sexy, less thrilling kind of aspect of it, which is the nurturing, which is the rewarding, that kind of like next level love, trust and connection part of it. That's the part that I think women are speaking to that, like you said, like everything else, the hot, sexy, thrilling part just gets like, it's so loud and it's so out there and it's so male driven, but like. And it's attention. I mean, you hear that and that's what you gravitate to.
And it's so easy to gravitate to that just because it's not as talked about. Yeah. And I think this having these conversations and having these female perspectives and amplifying those voices and those perspectives is super beneficial, not just for women learning about this kind of relationship that it exists, but also for the men.
Like if it's beneficial for more women, you know, benefits them if more women are out there, you know, being learning about it, being curious about it, not being judgmental about it, understanding it from a different point of view other than the porn memes and the yes yes that's exactly it it definitely takes a deeper understanding and getting away from like this stereotypical of what a cook should be or what a cook is as opposed to what it actually is I mean my husband is a very attractive man he very easily could get a date and whenever he wanted if he wanted to um he definitely has charisma um you know so it's not it's not that type of dynamic but it's also the dynamic that his wife can get whoever she wants whenever she wants and it definitely falls into that hot wifing, you know, pride aspects of it that that it doesn't have to be dampening to your self esteem to like being a cook.
Yes. Well, that's what I wanted to talk to you about. Because when it comes to misconceptions about this kind of relationship there, the fantasy around or the desire or that kind of cuck angsty feeling around feeling like you're not good enough as a lover, therefore your wife needs to go and have better dick. That's like such a common theme. And like a lot of guys out there just assume that that's the motivation behind it for us that, you know, I don't, you know, I don't want to just fuck that one dick forever. It's not very good. I need more, I need better.
That's not the case for a lot of women who I've spoken to. This is more about like, like you said, like you, your, your husband is, you know, you're, he's attractive, he's sexy, he's fun, he's got charisma, he can, you know, he's got game, he's got game. He's not small in size. This isn't about him not being enough. This is about you having more. More. Yes. Yeah. Not because it's from a place of deficiency. Like he's just, he can't give you what you need. It's from a place of abundance. Yes, yes.
And so I want those people who are listening right now to understand that the motivation behind why women want or love this kind of relationship is wide and varied. And that this cuckolding from an abundance kind of mindset is more common and should be given more credit than it's been given. Definitely. And, and to speak a little bit further into that is even like the humiliation aspects are also very similar. Like there are ways to go about that without being dampening to your self-esteem, you know, they're like in our dynamic.
There's definitely like aspects of humiliation beside, you know, within the cuckolding and even still, he's a confident man. It's just, you know, he's weak when I'm embodying that, that femininity, that power, that, that I'll see you next time. It's just, you know, he's weak when I'm embodying that, that femininity, that power, that, that just, it just kind of takes hold and go, you know, goes on its own thing. And it's just very powerful and beautiful. And he loves that. And he wants to embrace that and help me embrace that.
And it's empowering and it makes me see him as more of a man and as a higher intellectual level. Yes. Yeah. Crystal Welch says cucks are a higher life form. That's what she said. Truly, truly. Absolutely. She's right. And Dr. Justin Lee Miller, who wrote the book, Tell Me What You Want, interviewed thousands or a lot of people in the United States regarding their sexual fantasies. And what he found was that for people who desire or fantasize about cuckolding, they actually have higher levels of self-esteem than average people. I have read that.
Yeah, this idea that cucks are weak and that they're trying to make up for some lack of confidence is just absurd. I absolutely agree.
And I, I understand how that could be stereotypical, but I definitely want to help just kind of shatter that whole stigma because, um, like I said, I mean, in my my experience which my husband is the only man I've ever cooked and will be the only man I've probably ever cooked I don't plan on that but I'm sure that a lot of other women can speak to this that their their pleasure is in you getting your just your deepest desires and feeling that that power and feeling that confidence and you know Thank you. And you're the star, you know, that's what they want.
They, they want, they, it's like a gift giving acts of service, love language, a pure form i know and we're so lucky to have them like so lucky best i tell them all the time that i'm really the lucky one yeah and that's see that's what people don't understand about this kind of relationship because they they can't get past the unfairness part of it they're like but he doesn't you know that's so mean he doesn't get that sleep with other women too like that and see that's not something that I that my mind is really even bothered about and I'm very thankful for it I even I said this to him today I was like you know I'd be foolish to think that there weren't women that flirted with you or found you attractive but it's just not something that comes across my mind like people finding me attractive.
I just don't, know he wouldn't reciprocate it wouldn't be anything like that he truly has eyes for me and I know that and that definitely makes a difference yeah all right we don't have a lot of time left before we wrap up is Is there any kind of like final thoughts or things that you want to talk about?
I really, I just, I can't say enough how much I want to get out there, how amazing the dynamic is not just on the sexuality aspect, but just on a personal and emotional and mental aspect of exploring yourself and finding those deeper things that maybe you didn't think you would ever be able to explore and being able to explore them with someone else is just such a fruitful gift that everyone should be so lucky to have. And I, I'm just overwhelmed with the opportunities that it's brought to me. I really can do nothing but advocate for it.
And I just want to bring educational awareness and unbiased awareness to how great it can be on both sides, you know, for men and for women and how you can, you can truly have it all. It doesn't mean that your life has to be filled with, you know, sex crazed, you know, fantasies. You can still, you know, do your everyday life, but you can explore this side of yourself without feeling ashamed. Are you going to be writing a blog? I am. I am working on a blog. I will be probably coming out hopefully by the end of the month is what I'm aiming for.
And it's really going to be based on a lot of what I was saying, just a lot of female perspective, a lot of educational awareness and, you know, sharing my experiences and putting it out there for what type of fun can be had. I want to explore some of the risque sides of storytelling and maybe not say for work sides of storytelling, but I want to help women and men feel comfortable and as embodied as I feel. All right. Before we go, where can people learn more about you?
Um, currently I have, um, a Twitter account, which is a life of a hot wife and uh definitely no white guys uh only black guys uh are allowed to dm me um it's in my bio so just read it i have plenty that are like oh can i be your cook oh will you make an exception for me i'm so sorry no if that makes me mean that just fits the repertoire, right? Oh my God. I know. I know. But at some point, we have to get you on Blue Sky because I'm not even on Twitter anymore. Okay. I'll have to make the move. I'll make the move for you. Yes.
Well, thank you so much for coming on the show and sharing your story. It's been so great to get to know you, Ruby. Thank you. Thank you so much, Venus. I appreciate the opportunity. It was such a pleasure. I enjoyed it so much. That's going to be it for today's episode. Thank you so much for joining me. Make sure you go to venuscuckoldress.com. That's where you can book a private chat with me.
And you can also join the Queen's Quarters community and get all the amazing benefits like the private podcast and the helpful cuck tier where you can get key holding for the private Snapchat group, monthly private chats with me, and weekly live hangouts and invites to special live events. Oh, and you can also submit a question or confession for the show. Just go to venuscuckoldress.com and click on the link that says the podcast. Make sure you follow me on Blue Sky Social. Yes, I said Blue Sky Social. Fuck Twitter. My handle there is at CuckoldressV. All right. That's it for today's show.
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