It s a simple question that likely every guy who has thought about cuckolding relationships has wondered.... yet it s not such a simple answer.Should I be careful what I wish for? How do I know cuckolding is right for me? How do I know the reality won t be that much different from the fantasy? How do I know if I will regret it?This episode is a listener question and in order to dive deep on this one, Venus enlisted the help of 10 guys in the cuckolding lifestyle to weigh in and offer their advice. They ve offered up an outstanding collection of helpful tips and strategies that will be invaluable to many listeners of the podcast.Venus Cuckoldress - https://venuscuckoldress.com/New Merch! - https://www.fullswapshop.com/store/venus-cuckoldress/Submit a question for the show - https://venuscuckoldress.com/ask-venus/Pillow Talks - https://www.crowdcast.io/venuscuckoldressBecome a Patreon supporter - https://www.patreon.com/VenusCuckoldressTwitter - https://twitter.com/CuckoldressVInstagram - https://www.instagram.com/cuckoldressvenuspodcast/YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCxpeMPYHPFIapapZDoaa03wFacebook - https://www.facebook.com/The-Venus-Podcast-107081554590774Support the showDestination Links for Venus - https://linktr.ee/venuscuckoldressLearn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices❤️Venus Connections❤️ - Matchmaking for loving cuckolding relationships and female-led relationships. Learn more at https://www.venusconnections.com/ 👑♠️ Maison De Neige is high end lifestyle and streetwear fashion with a passion for the beauty of interracial combined with high fashion. Visit https://www.maisondeneige.com/ ❤️xoafterglow.com❤️ Meet the platform for ethical porn. Made by women, for women (and everyone). We make and share videos that portray sex accurately and treat performers with dignity, because nothing is sexier than consent. Use code VENUS for a free 7 day trial at ➡️ https://afterglow.ubpages.com/venus/Support the showDestination Links for Venus - https://lnk.bio/VenusPodcast
Transcript
Hey, are you looking for a hot wife? Maybe you're looking for a cuckold relationship. Then you need to join Venus Connections matchmaking service. It's totally private, it's fun blind dates, and all members are vetted. And it works. There was even a wedding last year and there'll be another one next year. It's definitely hard to find your life partner. I know. And it's even harder to find this kind of relationship. But you'll never win the lottery if you don't buy a ticket, right? So join VenusConnections.com. That's VenusConnections.com. And find the relationship of your dreams.
On this episode of the Venus Cuckoldress podcast. I've often played with cuckold fantasies for many years now. I've never articulated them to my partners. But I've often wondered if I should. But my biggest fear is, you know the old saying, be careful what you wish for. How do I know if cuckolding is for me? How do I know that the reality of it is not going to be very different to the fantasy and I might regret it? What would you recommend that I do to kind of answer that question?
I love question should i be careful what i wish for and how do i know if cuckolding is right for me i bet there's so many guys wondering the exact same thing for this question for this listener question i enlisted the help of 10 guys in this cuckolding lifestyle to give their best advice for this guy. And this collection of answers is absolutely priceless.
welcome to the venus cuckoldress podcast a place to learn all things cuckolding for the curious the passionate and the sexually empowered woman who wants it all make sure you go to venuscuckoldress.com to subscribe to the podcast and check out the venus blog and of course if you love it share it, sit back, make yourself comfortable, and enjoy the show with your host, Venus.
welcome to this episode of the venus cuckoldress podcast i'm your host venus thank you so much for joining me for this episode today today i'm going to talk about a a question that i am getting the feeling that nearly every single cuck is wondering, but doesn't come out and ask it straight up. So this is all about should I be careful what I wish for, how to know if cuckolding is right for me. And before I get into that, first of all, I wanted to say thank you to all of my Patreon supporters. You've been wonderful at allowing me to continue to do this work that I do with the podcast.
And I just want to mention for those of you who are considering becoming a Patreon supporter, as a Patreon supporter, you get a bonus mini episode every single week. It's released on Patreon and those episodes are a lot of fun. So also there's some other perks for being a Patreon subscriber. So you can have one to one voice conversations with. And there's live casts, live hangouts, including pillow talks, which are always so much fun. They're about once a month. And they include like fun, easygoing chats with myself and usually a couple of other ladies in this sexy lifestyle.
it's a lot of Q&A as well so if you have questions you can bring them to the pillow talk and we answer them for you. All right there's also contests and prizes recently I gave away some new merch as well as some of my favorite books and that all happened in one of the pillow talks. Also, of course, with one of the tiers in Patreon, membership perk is access to the Venus Vault on venuscuckoldjust.com. And of course, that's wildly popular. Wonder why. All right. Now I mentioned a little bit about merchandise. I am so fucking excited because I don't know a little bit about merchandise.
I am so fucking excited because I love the way that the Venus logo came out on it. Like it is really, really nice. I love it. So go to venuscuckoldress.com, click on the tab that says shop. And if you buy something, please let me know. Give me a shout out on Twitter at CuckoldressV or email me a picture, whatever. Like I want to see it. I totally want to see it. I get really excited about this. Lastly, I just want to say I mentioned back in January about building a community for women in this lifestyle as one of my main goals for this year.
And I just want to just say that, like, it's been amazing. I've been able to, you know, bring together quite a few women, and for mentorship, support, questions and answers, and most importantly, friendship. Because not everybody has, you know, girlfriends that they can talk to about their lifestyle or, you know, questions about bowls or whatever to other women in their regular everyday life. And this gives them the outlet, the opportunity to be able to do that. And it is hugely valuable.
So if you're a woman out there in this lifestyle, either partnered or not, just give me an email, venus at venuscuckolders.com. Send it to me. Just let me know you're interested in joining this little community that I have. All right, now I'm going to get into today's topic, which is, should I be careful what I wish for? How do I know if cuckolding is right for me? So let's have a listen. I have a feeling a lot of other guys are wondering the exact same thing. So here we go. Hi, Venus. Just a simple question for you. I've often played with cuckold fantasies for many years now.
I've never articulated them to my partners, but I've often wondered if I should. But my biggest fear is, you know the old saying, be careful what you wish for. How do I know if cuckolding is for me? How do I know that the reality of it is not going to be very different to the fantasy and I might regret it? What would you recommend that I do to kind of answer that question? Because at the moment, it's just a fantasy that I would like to explore, but I'm not sure if I should. All right. So there we go. That's the question.
It seems so easy, right easy right i mean this question came in quite a while ago and i i've been like okay i listened to the question in my mind i'm thinking automatically well my answer is you'll never know until you try it and that is just like not the right answer here, even though it seemed like it was at the time when I listened to it. But now, after a little bit of time has passed, I understand that there is so much more to this question.
And I'm so glad that I didn't try to answer this one right away because I've learned so much in the process of trying to figure out what this question is all about. And I feel so much wiser because of it. And it's been some help from conversations with other people and getting some feedback from the men in this lifestyle. So first of all, what I learned from this question first was that this has a lot to do with this kind of feeling of trepidation, like, ooh, should I go for it? Or should I not? Like, there's some fear, there's some hesitancy there.
And, you know, after that episode that I did with Dr. David Lay, where we talked about cuck shame, and we talked about the impact that that has on men in this lifestyle. And I've talked about cuck fear back way back in the beginning of this podcast. And I did an entire episode on it. But it's something I've learned over the years kind of manifests itself in different ways. It can be a fear to accept who they are in the very beginning when they realize that they're turned on by this. It can be complete fucking denial about it.
Like, like they're turned on when they're watching porn or something, hearing, listening to stories, whatever, turned on by it. And then afterwards, they're like, oh, fuck, no. Like, no. Total fucking denial. And they'll also retreat often. I guarantee some guys who are listening right now, next week, you're going to retreat completely from this podcast because you are afraid. You have this cuck fear. You have this cuck shame, and you just feel the need to like, get rid of it, and then you'll end up coming back. And it's this cycle that keeps on going.
Also, when I talk about cuck fear is it manifests in this way of this kind of like hyper exaggerated fear of being outed to anyone. This kind of fear of being outed that is so intense that it really affects the quality of your life or the quality of your relationships, or it puts a kind of like a stress or a strain on your relationship. This is what cuck fear manifests as. But with We'll be right back. relationships or it puts a kind of like a stress or a strain on your relationship. This is what cuck fear manifests as.
But with a girlfriend or wife, cuck fear, like I said, is this kind of fear or trepidation to go ahead with it, with cuckolding, to move from fantasy to reality. And this produces like this mass amount of feeling of like being scared and backing out and being like, you know, anxious about it. And it's a high level fear. And I totally get that. I get that now. I wish I knew that four years ago, but I get that now. And part of that fear is what this caller is talking about. And that is the what if, like, should I be careful what I wish for?
And what I figured out from talking to a lot of cucks recently is that a big fear is what if she likes it too much? What if she likes it more than I like it? What if I get left behind or left out in this process? That is a huge fear. Also, what if I try it and I realize I hate it? What if I'm not emotionally strong enough when this cuckolding happens? What if it damages my relationship with a woman who I love? What if she leaves me for someone else? These are all very valid fears.
So what I did to try to answer this question is I got together, you know, a group of my favorite, um, women in this lifestyle. And I said, Hey ladies, I need your help. I want you to canvas the men in your life to listen to this question and tell you what they think should be the answer according to them. And so I did that and I had like 10 guys answer for me and it's a variety of answers. And so I did that. And I had like 10 guys answer for me. And it's a variety of answers. And so I'm going to go through them one by one.
And I'm hoping that these answers help this caller and help all of the other guys out there who are also scared and wondering these exact same things. I hope that it helps you make a decision either way. clothing brand you can wear with pride. Don't sacrifice quality and comfort any longer. With Maison Dinege, you get both in fresh, empowering looks for every occasion, for everyone. From the streets to the sheets and everywhere in between. Check us out at MaisonDinege.com. Maison Dinege Couture, modern fashion for the modern revolution. All right, here we go.
So the very first one says, I think you need to approach it slowly, honestly, and multifaceted. You should share your thoughts and how it excites you, but makes you nervous. Let's be honest. Part of this is the angst. Hopefully you're doing it for her pleasure. And that's where you start. First, start with fantasy talk. Ask her to describe the best sex she's ever had or could imagine. Ask her what one person, maybe a celebrity, she would want to have sex with and let her talk about it while you're having sex. How does it make you feel to hear her talk about somebody else?
Then once you go out again, maybe ask her to point out guys she thinks would be a good fuck. Maybe have her flirt with somebody while you sit next to her. How does that make you feel? Finally, I would use either a larger strap-on or extension sleeve. How do you feel if she gets off more with something that's not you? Have her talk about how much bigger it is. Do you feel jealous or excited for her? He also adds here, this took place for us over three to five years. So he's not kidding when he says, take it slowly. All right. The next one is a very concise answer.
He said, he'll have to role play it out and see if the role playing satiates him. The next one here said he should have his exit plan built in before he makes the leap. So he knows it is his choice to be a cuckold and that he can get out at any time, either by his partner stopping or him leaving the relationship if he needs to. That way he's free to completely commit because it's a choice made from a position of love and commitment and not a situation in which he finds himself stuck out of fear. The next guy says, role play. Tell her you'd like to role play and try that out.
Also, he said, get his partner to masturbate him while telling him about a time she really enjoyed a previous experience in detail. If it leaves him wanting more, take further steps to explore. All right, this next one is actually from a cuck who was a guest on my podcast before. I really love this one. Here we go. He said, I remember when I first had thoughts about this. I had heard that it's easy to get excited about the cuckolding concept when you're horny as hell. However, you should try picturing your partner with another man after you've orgasmed and see if the feelings are the same.
I did that test and although it wasn't as intense, it was still hot to me. I think no one can ever be sure how they'll react when it really happens. Ultimately, you have to ask yourself, how badly do you want this? And then decide if you're willing to risk the possibility that it's not. From my experience and from the people I've come across, very few who have actually gone through all the way have come back to say, oh shit, that was a mistake. I would say that for the guys who go forward with it, 90% are glad that they did.
Sure, some guys wish they didn't, but for the most part, if you're willing to try, then chances are this is what you really want. So good. Okay, this next one is also really good. And he goes on to say, cuckolding for the cuckold is not really about the sex act as much as it is about what the emotions felt that the sex act creates. You really won't know what they will be until you do experience it. So to have less of a careful what you ask for and travel beyond a fantasy, it circles back to the strength of the loving and trusting relationship you have with your wife or girlfriend.
Underscored with honest communication. And he said, being best friends makes it an even better possibility. Excellent advice. Okay. So the next one, the next guy came up with three things. So he said, number one, He said, number one, he said, you will vacillate between accepting that you're a cuck and struggling with it. This may heighten after you tell your partner. Understand that it's normal and a part of the process and don't let it translate negatively. Number two, he said, ask yourself if you're only pursuing this for your pleasure and fulfilling your fantasy.
Even if you decide you want to pursue this, you have to ensure that your girlfriend will want it for herself. If she doesn't, you're probably setting yourself up for failure. Number three, if your cuckolding desires are extremely pervasive to the point where it really becomes essential to your own sexuality, you have to come to terms that is probably not something you can change. At that point, struggling against it is more problematic than accepting and exploring it. Ultimately, you won't know how you feel until you try it, but it can be even better than you imagine. Trust me.
That is great, great advice. Okay, the next one said, one of this guy's questions was, how am I going to deal with this? And a good measurement is how do you deal with jealousy in other aspects of your life, like jobs and personal life, etc. That might give you a good measurement of how you would deal with sexual jealousy. Do you compartmentalize it well? Is it going to fester? Do you know your partner well enough to bring it up?
If you find a partner who is willing to talk about sex and fantasies and is open-minded and who is somewhat sexually experienced and confident in other areas, then the odds are in your favor that she might be receptive to this. Okay, so cuck number nine said, the biggest fight is to accept that you want to be a cuck. Communication is the key. And in a good relationship, it should be possible to talk about everything that's on your mind. The only way to find out if this is the way he wants to live is to try it.
And if or when they decide that it's not for them, they can also go back to the way it was before. Lastly, this cuck said, I would tell him to start by opening up to his partner and be totally honest about both his persistent fantasies and desire. If she's able to wrap her head around that part without running, screaming from the room, he can start worrying about his trepidation, about actually going through with it. No sense struggling over a fear he may never face. From that point, if his partner's on board, it's communication, communication, and more communication.
He said, when my wife and I began and she realized how great the lifestyle could be for her, she offered me the caveat that if I ever wanted to stop, that would be all she needed to pull the plug. That gave me the confidence to stay the course and work through things that I wasn't expecting. Jealousy crept in fairly early, for one. I also had to learn that my brain could convert what I was feeling into compersion, and I could feel joy for her getting to experience the best sex she's had in years.
The emotional challenges of cuckolding are very real, and no matter how strong your proclivity to share your wife is, your ability to cope with those challenges does not come naturally. You can work through them along with your partner and the satisfaction and benefits are unique and amazing and so worth it. All right, so there we go. That is all amazing advice. I'm so glad that I canvassed these guys to get their take on it. Now I will, I do want to add this one thing, and this is important.
It was brought up with these guys' advice that you should be doing this for her and you should make sure that she's invested and on board with it. And if she's not, then it's probably not going to work out. She might try it initially for you, but if she doesn't love it, then it's going to go south. And what I will say is my advice for that, how to get her on board with it is you as a cuck need to be flexible with your fantasies. And this is so important. So if you listen to nothing else, listen to this right now.
Be flexible means that you may have this idea in your mind, this fantasy in your mind of the very first time you have a cuckolding experience. And you know, you've scripted it all out in your mind. It's going to be the perfect bull in the perfect setting. And she's going to do all these things and get off 10 times. And it's just going to be like epic, epic. You need to like, let that go. I mean, you're going to have lots of opportunities to have that fantasy play out down the road, but let it go for the very first time.
Number one, it is way too much stress on her shoulders to try to make that happen for you so perfectly. Also, it's unrealistic. It's probably not going to happen that way. So if she wants to do it differently, if she wants to just, you know, go fuck some random guy she picked up at a bar and you are not there to watch or anything like that, but you do get to hear about it afterwards. If that is the first time or if it is just listening on the phone or something, it's whatever she is comfortable with. If that's what it is, that's your first time, then that's what it's going to be.
And be happy as fuck, okay? Be grateful as fuck. Don't feel like you missed out on something. Because like I said, you have tons of opportunities down the road to make those epic fantasies come true. Also, you need to lay off on all of the specifics that you want. And with examples of that would be you want her to only fuck black guys. Well, maybe she doesn't want to. You can't push that on her. Maybe the guy who she finds as a bull is not as attractive as you would like for her. Doesn't fucking matter. It's what she wants. Maybe his dick is not bigger than yours and you're upset about that.
Doesn't matter. It's whatever she wants. Do not give her a hard time about that. If you want to take videos or pictures and you're acting like a little fucking director and, you know, telling people what to do and, you know, placing things, all of those things, that's a fucking turnoff. Don't do it. You can do that down the road when you get really familiar with people and you're all, you know, used to it and, you know, you can do stuff like that. But in the beginning, don't do it. All of that kind of control freak stuff is not appealing to her.
So if you really want her to be on board, make this about her. Make this about what she wants and how she wants to do it. trust me if you that, you'll have a lot better success and she'll be a lot happier and feel a lot less stressed about the whole thing. All right, that's it for today's episode. I want to send out a very special thank you to all the cucks who participated in helping me to answer this question for this listener. Thank you. I appreciate it.
And if you have a question that you would like to ask, you can go to venuscuckoldress.com, click on the Ask Venus, the Venus hotline button, and submit a question for the show, and I would love to answer it. And of course, if you'd like to join me on Twitter, my handle is at CuckoldrisV. I would love to connect with you there. All right. Thanks so much for joining me for this episode today. I really appreciate it. And we'll see you next time.
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