Can I say no to someone at a swingers club?
Yes — and you should, without apology, if you are not interested. The standard polite phrasing is "thanks, but we're not feeling it tonight" or "we're going to keep mingling, nice meeting you". A clear no is expected, respected, and never argued with at any reputable lifestyle club. Anyone who pushes after a polite decline — guilt-trips you, repeatedly approaches, or makes the no into a negotiation — is violating the most non-negotiable rule of lifestyle etiquette and is the person the club ejects, not you.