Make it possible to block those who block you

KC Squared: What line is crossed when it turns from "hmmm, someone looked at our profile" to "what a creep"? If a couple had looked at the profile the same number of times, would both of them be "creeps"?

The line is crossed when you can't view the creepers profile.. and possibly block them......

AND

it happened... I was contacted by a couple that has interest but has single males blocked... email sounded nice, but other than the very generic main profile, I CAN'T VIEW THEIR PROFILE!!!! so I guess we have to take our conversation off site to KiK (SLS seems to hate this, doesn't really make sense that members would have to go off site to communicate, at least initially, but that the way its set up).... so off site on KiK I have to sound like the creeper pic collector and ask them for pics... and if and when they send them... and I find no attraction, its a somewhat rude rejection knowing it was based on looks.... (lol) (even though they initially found my profile attractive as they were actually able to view it),

the purpose of the site should be to facilitate easy communication for like minded people (paid members).... blocking/viewing/going off site to communicate really defeats the entire purpose.....

Of all the things the site could've improved upon a few years ago and they went with allowing people to see who has viewed them...

Obviously the site isn't changing the way things are done, so the only option is to turn off WVM so you don't know who is looking at your profile. If anyone is that concerned about someone perving/stalking their photos then they can put them in their personal folders and only open them when they want, for who they want.

Couples and women deal with this, too. Men can, and do, block couples & women then repeatedly visit our profiles. I turned our WVM off the second day the WVM started because I kept seeing the same guy over and over and over again but we couldn't do a damn thing about it. It is creepy as fuck. But what was I going to do? Bitch about it?

You're assuming that programming that "simple" enhancement would be an easy - a rash assumption given the antiquated software that SLS appears to use.

Although I tried to offer up a reasonable explanation (at least to me) for a couple viewing a single male profile while having their own profile hidden from single males - I do understand your concerns and frustrations. And I think you are right - they should have to unhide their profile in order to view hidden profile groups. And perhaps if they have viewed your profile then they should no longer be hidden from you. But I'm not sure the existing software infrastructure is capable of being modified to allow those refinements. And I'm not sure management ever listens to user concerns when it comes to desired upgrades and enhancements.

@Excalibur2012

I do understand the difference between blocking and hiding the profile from a particular group. I would prefer to be blocked because then at least I know the block goes both ways and they can no longer perv and stalk my profile. Let's call it what it is the couples viewing my profile when they have their profile hidden are STALKERS and PERVS plain and simple they hide behind their wall and peek and there is nothing I can do to prevent it. I do NOT wish to have to hide my profile from all couples to prevent it as I have many couples that are very good friends. I have been a life member from very nearly the beginning of this site so I do not think adding one little upgrade to make it so that a group you hide from is hidden from you as well is too much to ask really.

you completely discount the fact that many many many couples are only looking for a single... I would bet that its a pretty even amount of couples that are looking for a single female vs. looking for another couple, and almost argue that the majority of couples are looking for a single female... (yeah, I know that negates any arguement about single males) but to try and define swinging as a couples activity only is very limiting.....

and I have yet to hear anyone address the security issue... as mentioned the blocks work on all groups of profiles, for example.... so as a single female, would you feel safe knowing that a single male (perhaps an ex, perhaps a stalker), has blocked all single females yet continues to view your profile, maybe gathering information, pictures, etc? and there is nothing you can do about it????? privacy is a huge issue in the swinging world with many/most people........

Firstly: I don't know if we are all in understanding that there IS a difference between blocking and hidden...albeit, slightly. Maybe, single men of SLS, if you understood WHY couples felt the need to have there profile hidden from single men, you wouldn't question it as much.

I would also like to point out, that the very same things happens to couples too, not just single male profiles. For example: we found that a couple blocked us last week. As a couple, there is no way for us to block them now. Meaning in order to block them, we would have to wait for them to unblock us. Now, obviously, we don't care that much, and we just moved on with our life. Is it slightly unfair, maybe. But this is the format, if you don't like it, go to a different swinger site. But considering this is how blocking works for even couples on here, don't think you as a single male are being treated unfairly when we choose to have our profile hidden from you. You're not.

Secondly,

While that might be their opinion, what Softtaild7 stated is a pretty unfair generalization of swinging. But they aren't entirely incorrect either. Hear me out...

Single males have stated "couples have all the power/what makes couples better than singles". It's very simple gentlemen, without couples, there is no swinging. Period. Without couples we are all just single people in a ol' dating site looking for someone to have sex with.

Listen, nothing makes anyone "better" than someone else. I'm no better than you, you're no better than me. It doesn't work that way. BUT, if you removed all singles from the equation...swinging would still prevail. Honestly, as singles in a game that's made for couples, be tickled that you are here on SLS, because there's PLENTY of sites and groups where you would not be allowed.

To slightly revise what was said before; Swinging IS for couples. Singles in the swinging scene are for couples who choose to play with singles. Singles are not a given; but couples, are.

If you don't like how the game is played, don't play.

Not sure whether to feel bad for you or should I put a MAGA hat on and smirk a little.

well, Im glad Softtaild7 defined what the swinging scene is all about... couples only, and single people are for the loser couples that can't find another couple.... glad thats all cleared up...

Haha, High horse, get over yourself... that's amusing. Swinging is for couples, singles in the swinging scene are for couples who can't get another couple.

@Softtaild7 You really NEED to get over yourself! What makes you better than singles or anyone else for that matter. All I am asking is a reciprocal block if a couple or anyone for that matter blocks single males or any other group from viewing their profile they should not be permitted to view the profiles of those in that group. It is a matter of mutual respect something you probably preach but are obviously NOT really into practicing. Get off your high horse this topic has nothing to do with you unless of course you are one of the couples who block single males and then PERV on their profiles like stalkers.

What did singles complain about before Who viewed me was implemented... Oh, was it grammar...

KCSquared: "Second, on SLS a 'peeper' is looking at your profile that YOU VOLUNTARILY ADDED to a PUBLIC website. "

and why is this only only a one way street... can't the same be said about couples profiles???? or any profiles for that matter???

would you have any problem with SLS using your profile pics in adverstising??? would you have any problem with another profile that has you blocked being able to view and take your profile pics and use them for who knows what?? after all, its a public website right? and you voluntarily posted the stuff.....

no... there is and should be some amount of privacy respected in this lifestyle.... and this situation does not allow a blocked group from tailoring their privacy the was they see fit.....

Tron, I'm right with you in this. It's very fustration to go through this. And I believe only single guys really have to deal with this. Couple's have all power in this site. I've had couples look at my profile several times, and I can't look at there's. It's fustrating.

sorry... the reverse arguement given by people that say "maybe the couple that views you and blocks single males may contact you some day" is crap...... bottom line, its not only annoying, but it can be a stalking/security risk, where profiles can view at will other profiles of the group they have blocked, but the viewed profile has NO recourse to block that profile other than blocking and entire group of people... it can be borderline harassment........

imagine a peeping tom looking in your window every night and although you know they are there, you can't see who it is, you can't see them, and there is nothing you can do about it, and when you call the police, they tell you to move........

@justthe2ofus6969

If someone blocks you directly I believe the system automatically places the block the other way as well. However If you block couples, Single males or Single females I think you should not be able to view those profiles either. After all they can not view you so why should you be able to view them. If you block them from viewing you that is saying you do not want to hear from them and are therefore NOT interested, My point then is that if that is the case and you are NOT interested in single males (from my perspective) then you have NO right to look at my profile and therefore should not be able to do so.

You should be able to block people who may have looked at your profile then blocked you from looking at their profile. I just had that happen to us another couple looked then blocked couples from seeing their profile

@KCsquared

To address your post more pointedly IF YOU DON"T CARE FOR MY RANT DON'T READ IT. That is basically my point those who do not like single males and block them from viewing their profiles have NO need to be able to view ours either. Because they have US blocked as a group we can NOT block them back since we can not see their profiles to begin with so Please stay the F out of what does NOT concern you.

@KCsquared

And I as a Life member did not pay my fees? If I want my damned profile not visible to those who block all single males then it should be so. It is not that difficult after all if you block someone they automatically block you from viewing that profile unless you unblock them. So if you block a whole category of people then those profiles should not be viewable either.

How about making it so anybody can block anybody; and, after being blocked, the blocked can no longer see the profile of the blocker? (i.e., potential "blockee" should not be able to hide behind preventing certain categories from seeing their profile so it can't be blocked by you yet be able to see the your profile - not cool)

@RonKathy Obviously this has NO impact on you so it's very easy to tell someone to "get over it" or "turn off that feature of the site" rather than address the actual issue. Couples that block single males IN MY OPINION have NO right to go and view those profiles PERIOD. Just because you are a couple does NOT make you better than me nor does it give you the right to tell me to get over it and move on. If they are NOT interested I want them BLOCKED from viewing me period, is that so hard of a thing to understand. They have the right to block me but if I want to keep them from viewing me I have to block ALL couples? that's like telling those couples that do not want men to block all couples as well because you know... there is a male half of the couple.

@sls_WayneC

No, I do not want to block ALL couple from viewing or contacting me I only want those who choose to not allow me to view them to not be able to view me. There are couples who do allow and welcome single males or singles of both sexes to view and contact them. I do not wish to block those at all.

@PhoebertAndWife No if they are not interested in single men I do not find it flattering or a compliment that they choose to peek at my profile especially when several of those who do are couples with supposedly straight male partners who when they do connect it is JUST the male wanting to meet for 1 on 1 just us guys but they do NOT want their wife to know about their Bi attractions.

No if they block me or single males in general I do NOT want them able to view my profile or contact me in ANY way for ANY purpose period. I get tired of going to check someone out who checked me out only to find that they have single males blocked. So what is good for the goose IS good for the gander if they made the decision to NOT be viewable or contactable to single males then they made that decision and NEED to live with it.

Agreed! As a paying member I just run into one profile after another from those that block single males, yet they can view my profile? My membership is up and seriously considering not rejoining.

I'm with Tron on this one and have voiced similar concerns in the past. I don't want to block all couples, or singles who have viewed my profile just because a few but won't permit me to see theirs. I want to be able to block specific profiles from viewing me. Very frustrating to be continuously visited by someone that won't let me return the visit. I don't see why I should block an entire group to accomplish it.

So you have no interest in people who may have single males blocked at this moment but might be looking for someone like you for the future?

Take it as a compliment that the small amount of info in the hover over view enticed them to look closer - they may contact you to meet or play in the future.

~Phoebert's Wife