Overweight

What type of profiles are you going after? I mean. I don't go after those where the couple look like models and are a complete smoke show. Assortative mating my friend.

My husband and I are both large people, however he doesn’t mind that. I on the other hand do mind being large, because like many have said people pass on us because of size as well as if we drink or smoke. We have been in the LS for eight years we were younger looking and a tad smaller when we started, bodies changed and so did our mentality. We recently moved to the Kansas City area and heard that clubs are not inclusive to large people. So my question is why not and what makes us different than those who are not large sized?

We are also a larger couple and have similar issue. We don’t let it get us down as we continue to try. If someone doesn’t want us for our size then doubt it would work out anyways. We started attending club that we love and really enjoy and open us up more personality wise. We are also both working on loosing and getting healthier. I, Joey, have lost over 400lbs Over last 16 yrs.

OP: The profile definitely reads better than originally, but as stated, a bit bland, but good nonetheless.

Kudos! Good luck!

~Allen

I would like to meet you.

From one bigger couple to another, while yes our size does limit some of the replies we get and we know that, it does not stop us from having fun and continuing to go about playing in the lifestyle. You have to be happy with yourselves first. From reading other posts here, it looks as you have made adjustments to your profile, which is always a plus. Will people continue to simply look at the pictures or just the stats posted? yes, but the way we look at it is it is their loss if there are common interests and the only reason for not reaching out is our size. We have also been working on our weight, which is not an easy task. The best advise I can give you is to keep going to the places where others with similar interests go, have fun together, and others will join in. Feel free to send us a message if you would like to discuss more.

You are not going to get the answer here, like anywhere outside this site. True reason(s) would sound offensive to the most of people, putting "arrogant moron" mark on the person who pronounced it. No one wants that at the cost of trying to help another person, so general safe approach - better do not say anything. It is "Be nice" game, you should know that by now. Plus you are 35 y.o. and should be more than able to detect obvious things and find way how to fix them. There is only one reason for not doing it - denial . That is another reason why advice would not help.

If you want to meet people, you have to go to where the people are.

Will being overweight effect how receptive others who aren't overweight are towards you? Of course it will, but there are still plenty of opportunities as long as you are patient and have personalities that are inviting.

“Couples please be clean, no STD, and have a career. Not looking for a fuck. We will not sleep with everyone we meet.”

I looked at the pictures first because, well, that’s what I do. Then I wanted to spank her ass because she looks pretty sexy. I then read the profile and lost any interest I may have had. Mrs. 888 would have read it first because that is what she does and then made a “hmmmph” sound and closed it out after making a note.

Get profile help. Good luck!

~Allen

Honestly, I don't think it's your weights. Your profile is not appealing, only one of your photos is attractive, and you harp on the issue of cleanliness and hygiene so often that it seems like you think swingers are inherently dirty and smelly. That's going to make a really bad impression. Correction, it has made a bad impression, at least on me.

If you're up for some blunt advice, maybe create a thread in Better Profiles asking for help.

Also, there are some swingers in their mid-30s, but the bulge in the population is about 10 years older, so there's that.

How can you meet couples that you are attracted to, when your overweight. It seems like people see we are overweight and they pass. They don't give us a chance to get to know us. We are limited to the much older crowd and it makes it hard to enjoy the lifestyle. How can I overcome this? We are working hard to be healthier for us. He has lost over 100lbs and she's lost over 20lbs.