Yet another profile review request

Thanks everyone for your review and suggestions on how to improve our profile. I think the changes we made have made it a lot better. - Jack and Diane.

For whatever reason, figuring out where content fits best is hard for a number of people. In some cases, content can fit in a couple different sections.

As mentioned, I think having the content exist in your profile, even if it's not the best fitting section, is more important than not having the content at all. IMHO, even the very best profile is not going to make a huge difference in one's online hit rate vs just a decent profile that could use a little work.

This does not apply to polarizing content, like specifying you must be of a particular political persuasion. That WILL be limiting, regardless of how good the rest of the profile is.

Ooops - just realized that phrase I dislike says "she/he" - but you might want to leave it out anyhow.

I can't be the only person that reads quickly and misses that detail. ;-)

Much better default photo - you both look happy!

I read you profile right after you posted your request but didn't have time to gather my thoughts and compose a reply. And in the meantime you've gotten some great advice.

Mostly I'd just like to add - try not to narrowly describe what you want or over-explain your reasoning. We really don't need to know your reasoning - it just adds clutter. Defining your preferences too narrowly may discourage some perfectly wonderful people and the idiots you want to discourage don't read profiles. You can keep your options open and accept/reject other swingers on a case-by-case basis.

And perhaps eliminate wording and phrases that identify the author - if it's obvious that the male half has written a couple's profile then I wonder if his lady is really all that interested in swinging. I especially disliked the comment about "if she's happy, you'll reap the benefit" - that shit works both ways!

Good luck, have fun and stay safe!

~Phoebert's Wife

@mayhem8 - thanks.

It looks a bit better. While it's more important that the content exists vs where it is located, IMHO I think the following fits better here -

Under Looking For (because it talks to what you're looking for) -

"MFM Threesome: We prefer single, local guys 55+. Even if you aren't local, our steps remain the same. So, we are unlikely to be a good fit if you aren't here for a couple of weeks or aren't prepared to have this play out over a few visits.

Couples: What we seek will likely evolve as we gain experience with other couples. We would prefer that at least the female member of the couple be 60+ years of age, preferably both. But that isn’t cast in stone. Being local is important to us."

Under Description (because it describes things about you) -

"Our tastes and interests are wide and varied in other areas as well. We both enjoy exploring restaurants, wine bars, and the like. Jack enjoys exploring the world of single-malt scotch. Music and going to the theater are big things in our lives. We recently saw the musical Mrs. Doubtfire and loved it. We both enjoy cooking and often have fun creating new dishes together. Jack is a smoked BBQ aficionado. We love the cruel, stark beauty of the desert and frequently take long drives with no particular destination in mind. The bottom line is that we like to take the road less traveled. We both have an innate sense of curiosity."

@all_of_my_editors - how about this...?

Tag line: Blessed are the curious, for they shall have adventures

Looking For:

We are looking for people like us. You will be passionate, empathetic, and adventurous. We will likely be a good fit if you believe caring for your partner should come first. (After all, if she/he is happy, you will reap the benefits of that.) Respect and understanding that we take our time is important to us.

We prefer to find and make long-term friendships and have repeat encounters. That will make playtime even more enjoyable.

Description:

Diane is a feisty, insatiable dynamo. She is evidence that amazing things come in small packages. She is a voracious, multi-orgasmic, squirting woman. She is very open-minded and loves to say she will try anything once or twice. She loves sex and almost everything about it. She has taken to the lifestyle like a duck takes to water. Jack has said more than once that he is a fortunate guy. Something that Diane readily agrees with.

According to Diane, Jack is a handsome, blue-eyed, imaginative, and kinky lover. While he isn't a "Ken" he has a nice "Dad-body" and is quite adept with his tongue, fingers, and cock. While it was his idea to try out this lifestyle, or hobby as he likes to put it, Diane has had nothing but positive experiences.

Fantasies and/or real experiences:

MFM Threesome: We prefer single, local guys 55+. Even if you aren't local, our steps remain the same. So, we are unlikely to be a good fit if you aren't here for a couple of weeks or aren't prepared to have this play out over a few visits.

Couples: What we seek will likely evolve as we gain experience with other couples. We would prefer that at least the female member of the couple be 60+ years of age, preferably both. But that isn’t cast in stone. Being local is important to us.

Additional comments and things to do, see, hear, or learn about:

Our tastes and interests are wide and varied in other areas as well. We both enjoy exploring restaurants, wine bars, and the like. Jack enjoys exploring the world of single-malt scotch. Music and going to the theater are big things in our lives. We recently saw the musical Mrs. Doubtfire and loved it. We both enjoy cooking and often have fun creating new dishes together. Jack is a smoked BBQ aficionado. We love the cruel, stark beauty of the desert and frequently take long drives with no particular destination in mind. The bottom line is that we like to take the road less traveled. We both have an innate sense of curiosity.

Initially, while Jack is away (which happens frequently), he will exchange messages with you here. All of these messages will be shared with Diane. If she is interested, then move on to the next step. A recent face pic will be asked for early on. At that point, we would like to exchange mobile numbers for texting each other. Once we are all comfortable, Jack will arrange for you to meet with Diane over coffee and/or lunch.

While Jack is in town, we should meet for a drink first to get to know each other.

@mayhem8 - thank you!!

While face pics are obviously important to you, I'd think that your opening line would be better with a statement that says what you're looking for in a single or couple.

Some of the text can be tightened up a little. For example, "We do love sex and all of the fun that brings to the table, but it is important to us that we like and, hopefully, develop long-term friendships with those we meet. For us, that will serve to make playtime even more enjoyable." could just say. "We prefer to find and make long term friendships and have repeat encounters". The fact that you like sex is a given.

Living where you do, you no doubt get many visiting the area on vacation. Your profile seems more geared towards them than for local people. What I mean by that is that it's all about the sex, and nothing about what other hobbies interest you. I'd think you'd want friends (and playmates) that have some common interests besides just sex, but there is nothing in your profile about what those other hobbies are.

The pictures and general stats (i.e. height/weight) should make it so that profile text to physically describe you isn't needed and can be removed, though there isn't really that much of it there to start with. The space would be better served by talking about your other interests, which will more than make up for any removed physical description text.

I'm sure others will chime in with more, but those are a few obvious things I suspect would improve your profile.

@goodgollymsmolly98226—Harsh is not how I would describe your feedback. Direct? To the point? Specific? Yes, which is precisely what I was hoping to receive. I somehow intuitively knew I was missing the mark. Yet, despite that inner voice, I wasn't sure how to fix it. Your comments have helped a lot.

Thank you.

Hi. I have no idea how I didn't see your earlier post. I'm sorry, because it can already be challenging to ask for a critique.

So, first, based on your participation in the forums, you're lovely. Please keep that in mind as I work my way through what I have to say, because it's the basis for what follows. Which is that your profile is not doing a good job of representing that loveliness. I'm not sure it will matter with men, except that it will somewhat reduce the...quality? Basically, it will attract less picky men.

Tagline: I recognized the reference, but for those who don't, the assumption will be the driving force here is the guy (the I). Not sure that's in your best interest when looking for couples.

In terms of photos, you could do better, but the only objectionable one is your default, which has caught her in a very weird expression. See if you can get one with equally committed smiles (and maybe more muted lipstick on her part) instead.

Text: There is absolutely no reason to start with a negative, no matter how committed you are to age restrictions. Also, there is no reason for the underlying insecurities that appear to be on display. Men don't care and women interesting enough to be playmates won't judge. (When I started, my oldest playmates were in their 70s, men and women both, and I never gave their crows feet or skin laxity a thought, except when I was having trouble convincing them that, yes, I was indeed interested.)

Maybe work on letting others decide if you're out of their age range.

Anyway, for the rest of Looking For, the last two paragraphs are fine, although you really should strip out the negativity and learn the difference between the conversations the two of you have and what serves as an invitation to others. You have the former now.

In Description, I feel like I should have a macro pre-loaded, because it's variations of the same thing I say nearly every time: Surprisingly, people are far less interested in how you fuck than in what kind of people you are. Especially since you want to take your time, they'll either ask, pick it up from the vibe, or you will talk about it at your first meeting. I want to know Jack and Diane and so will others who look at your profile. So, what are you like as people? What do you like to do? What makes you the unique, sparkling individuals you are? What kind of a couple are you?

Fantasies has you back to negativity and proscriptiveness. It's not a good look. I get that you want to maximize the positive contacts (so, holding back the deluge of messages from 20 something guys), but it doesn't work, except to turn off the folks who are actually going to read your profile and mostly not send "Hi" messages.

I'd given up by the time I got to Additional comments. It's not negative, exactly, but it's definitely proscriptive and possibly a verbatim agreement that the two of you have. The rest of us don't really need to know any of that, except that you like to have an initial meeting first.

The black ring thing though? Not just for swingers. Mostly not for swingers. Also, as someone who has been on the receiving end of arch questions from people who read as swingers (it was when toe rings and anklets were supposed to have been a sign) while I was working, it's creepy. The best place to find swingers is on swinger sites and at swinger parties.

Sorry I'm so harsh, but I think you deserve interesting, awesome partners and also think you're pretty far off the mark for getting them.

@irishrose22—Thank you. I will remove the text about the black ring and add a full profile photo as soon as possible. I appreciate your input.

Quick synopsis:

Pictures are ok, but having full body length shown in at least one picture is beneficial.

Profile length is fine, but the line about the black rings isn't needed nor is it likely to be helpful in any way.

Questions I have....

Is it too long?
Is it too specific?
Are we being too blunt or restrictive?
Does it give people an idea of who we are?
Are our pictures ok?
Are we doing a reasonable job of marketing ourselves?

Hi everyone, please take a look at our profile and let us know what you think. The good, the bad and the ugly.

Thanks in advance.

Jack (and Diane)