SM Profile review feedback request.

Phoenix, AZ, Us

Hi. I don't actually agree with Velma. It definitely is easier if you fill some fantasy niche, because there are way more guys than couples and women looking for them, but if you can build a friend group the lifestyle is ideal for anyone who is looking for non-traditional sex. It is just that the odds are worse here than they are on Tinder, etc. In person is easier than online, which is why the standard advice is to find clubs and parties that allow single men. But, you know, pandemic.

So, as far as your photos go, you have the right idea with the non-selfies (those can just go) and the great smile, but your clothes don't exactly fit well. Not your fault that it's a pet peeve, but, really, there is no reason to wear shirts that you could easily hide half a kindergarten class under.

Taglines are meant to generate sufficient interest that people want to open your profile. Yours gives too much information and eliminates the need to do that. So, change it to something short and, if possible, clever. Steal if you can't think of anything. Hell, if you're even a tiny bit nerdy, steal mine.

Okay, here's what you have in Looking For: "Looking for couples and females. I like to ensure the woman is satisfied. Interested in an ongoing situation or NSA. I am open to new experiences and fulfilling couples, or a single woman's fantasies. Enjoy many types of play situations in the lifestyle."

Okay, most of this doesn't belong here, because it's about you instead of who and what you're looking for. That difference is not subtle. It's also too...not passive, but maybe insufficiently assertive. It's a good thing to be a nice guy who wants to please, but if you aren't careful it slides over into too much eagerness to please and that's just exhausting.

What about "I'm looking for couples and women with fantasies I can fulfill?" You'll need more, but it doesn't have to be more than one or two more sentences. Just a little bit about the kind of people you're looking for and what you're looking for (NSA, on going, whatever).

In Description, concentrate on the kind of person you are and your vanilla interests. Definitely mention your six years in the lifestyle - bonus points if any of that was as a couple - but not your sexual predilections. You can leave out the exhortations to have fun! too. What makes you unique and valuable is not that you like oral or love to please, but the concoction that makes up who you are. That's what goes here. Don't waste words talking about your height (it's in your toggles), your shoulders (in photos) or hair color (ditto). Don't use tired tropes like SWM either. Being able to enjoy good music and engaging conversations though? Yeah, that's gold.

In Fantasies, cut some of that down. I like the way it cuts across how wholesome you appear to be, but there's too much of it. Also fix whatever it is that is causing weird gaps in the text and add an extra line in between paragraphs. Oh, and being "open minded" when your cert talks about MMF is generally going to be taken as a signal that you're heteroflexible, at the very least. If you aren't, I'd just leave that phrase out.

Additional comments is fine, but if you want to say something about liking to please, this might be a good place for it.

Basically, if I had to guess, you're just a little too passive in the way you've worded your profile and your photos could use an upgrade, but if you tune things up a little and carefully pick the people you contact, you might do pretty well even now.

Good luck.

Germantown, MD, Us

I understand your point about not being the fantasy look.. I don't have that "bad boy" type look. I have had good luck in the past with MFM, but it really just depends on the couples and what they are looking for. Or even that female in the lifestyle. I thought it might of been something in my profile that might of been throwing people off..
I will give hinge and OKC a shot.. "vanilla dating" does not interest me very much. At my age they are always looking for the LTR and ring. That is not on my outlook.

Virginia Beach, VA, Us

I’m going to put this a different way.

If you had a wife or girlfriend I would probably play with you because you look good and I bet you are interesting. But as a single man... you just aren’t what most women are looking for in an MFM.

Virginia Beach, VA, Us

Look, swinging is about fantasy.

This probably isn’t what you want to hear, but you just aren’t the “fantasy” type. I can practically guarantee that zero women have you in mind as a fantasy fuck.

But could I see you as someone’s boyfriend? Yes. I could totally see girls snuggling into you during cuffing season.

If you have a job and an OK personality, you should try Hinge or OKC. Pay for a membership, don’t be a cheapskate. I think you’ll do fine.

If you don’t have time for a girlfriend you won’t have time to swing.

Just trust me on this, you will have a better chance of getting laid in vanilla dating.

Germantown, MD, Us

Wow.. Not something I have heard like that before.. Benn told I am a nice guy.. but haven't heard I don't look like the right fit. I wish It was that easy on those dating apps. I am on Bumble/Tinder. Lots of flakes on there. I really am not looking for a LTR relationship. I wish the luck was good on those apps like you say. Prefer a ENM, or something on going in the swinger lifestyle, or enjoy some fun with couples.. I have had some good fun with many couples and friends in the past, and still would like to. I really don't have the time for a "girlfriend". Don't know it it's the area I'm in or not, but seems like you get ignored a lot.
Any possible changes suggested for better results?

Virginia Beach, VA, Us

Based on your pictures... honestly I don't think you should be here.

You look like a nice guy. Like... looking at all your pictures you look like you should have a hot 30 year old girlfriend. You aren't the right fit for a single male here. You are more of a boyfriend/teddy bear type.

You seem like the kind of guy who could clean up on OK Cupid. Maybe you should give the online dating world a shot rather than get sex here.

Germantown, MD, Us

Didn't even think of that.. It was a mfm.. No male on male action. I forgot doing that means two different things to some people if they don't know. . That I will change. Thanks for that. I know the person that wrote the cert was not aware of the difference. she used them interchangeably as the same thing.

Fort Payne, AL, Us

At a minimum you've created confusion by identifying as straight but listing mmf in experience (and your cert also mentions mmf).

The order of the letters matters!

Germantown, MD, Us

Hello,

Could I get some feedback on my profile and pictures? I have been a member for a little bit. Active off and on. I have a good bit of experience in the lifestyle, and pretty openminded.
Lots of time I will get couples or females to visit my profile, but not message me, or respond to a message. I don't send one liners or rude messages when I do send a message. So, I'm thinking it must be my profile or pictures that are throwing people off? I know I am not the hottest guy, but not the worst either.. I do have a good bit of info on my profile about myself, and correct spelling. Is it too much info?

I know it's tough for Single males in the lifestyle, but I guess it's my turn to reach out and see if there's anything I can change because I'm getting tired of being ignored..

Suggestions would be appreciated.
Thanks