Profile Review - Open for all feedback

Please post your own thread and we’ll get to you.

I like your ideas regarding having someone’s profile stand out. Feel free to look at ours. Thank you :)

Yes - I think it is your hot tub line that stands out. You having a hot tub is cool. You wondering if someone else has one is just a reminder that you don't have one. What stands out out about you that would make you be interesting and sexy? There's not really anything in your profile - every guy here wants to get laid and pleasure a woman, and not sure interest in golf or beer really gets it done. So when you combine blah pictures with blah text, you just end up as one of the dime a dozen male profiles that exist on here.

Phoebe's Wife - those are all very good points about the pictures. I will be asseessngnthat today.

Thanks!

I looked at your profile before you had any replies and promptly got pulled away from the computer. I can't remember anything specific about your profile but it looks pretty good now.

But your photos really need some help. I have no idea which of the two men holding trophies is you. I had to look carefully to find you beside the giant bow on the car. You should be the focus of any photos - crop out your friend, crop out the car, avoid selfies (especially bathroom mirror selfies) and smile. Even if you obscure your face a smile affects you whole body.

Most of all - you need to readjust your expectations. I somehow stumbled upon your posting about lack of responses - It was not pretty.

Even without a pandemic online encounters are difficult to arrange. This is not a quick or easy way to swing. People are busy - work and family generally take priority. Some people don't visit SLS daily and it sometimes takes a few days for both to read messages, compares notes and make a decision about replying or not. Many people do not respond because it's less stressful.

Going to parties or clubs has a much better chance for success - people have taken the time to prepare and are looking to play. Many profiles are not necessarily looking to play - some are just wishful thinking, some are total fiction. And right now even couples that usually play might be a lot more cautious about meeting.

Good luck and stay safe!

~Phoebert's Wife

Oh goodness thanks I need tochange that now

Three pics, all have your face blocked out but you left the other guy for people recognize? Does he mind he's on a swing site?

Velma - I appreciate your honesty and feedback. Everyone has been very forth coming with their feedback. Cheers!

I think that my big fear with you is that you... smell like a married man who is cheating or a guy who got divorced and is just clueless.

So... let's look at your choice of pictures. You have one with you... buying a car? I don't know. Did you get it as a gift? From a wife? I'm not sure, but moving to the next picture... with the extra long shorts and the oversized polo the only thing you are missing as socks with sandals.

You seriously look like the guy who takes his kids to Applebees on Wednesday night visitation. That's what popped into my head about you. Between the sports talk and the beer talk, I have this image of you living in one of those three-level garden "murder" apartments where the only two pieces of furniture in the livingroom are a 60 inch TV and a single recliner.

Maybe I'm wrong about all of this, but you just kind of got this feel to you like you have no idea what's going on in fashion or in life.

I married an amazing guy. He's funny and smart and takes me on trips and puts it in my butt. If you want to compete with that, you really have to step up your game.

You aren't just competing with other single men, you are competing with the guys we married.

What do you bring to the table that they don't? Think about that. I want to see pictures of you in Miami partying. Or on a boat. Or traveling. I want to see a muscular guy who has the confidence to take a picture on the beach shirtless.

If you don't have the time to get in shape or go to Miami to take pictures, why would I date you when I already know guys who can?

My suggestion? Drop SLS for now. Get a personal trainer and get in shape - not just good shape but fucking amazing shape. Get some pictures taken of you traveling or doing interesting things. Then come back on here with your posted pictures.

This probably isn't the advice you want. I'm sure you wanted to here that you are hot and seem fun. But honestly, guys like you are a dime a dozen. Work on making yourself amazing and stand out.

Also - I am here for one reason and one reason only and that into meet couples for sexual encounters. I am not interested in anything else. Having a hard time adding more to my profile.

Ok...can you be more specific?

I'm not sure your pictures are doing you a ton of favors. The text is ok, a little playful, which is nice. But it also isn't terribly interesting or exciting.

Hi again. First, I somehow accessed your profile feed and found a whiny post by you. I've never used this function, but if you can delete it, do so. Nobody owes you a response and being "flabbergasted" by that is just entitled. Nobody reading your post is going to remain interested in most circumstances. Plus, I've heard that if you get a 20% response rate, you're way above the curve (and even then most responses will be thanks but no thanks).

I don't love your tagline (it could be seen as adjacent to guys who say they're the best you'll ever have, which is never true), but if you do, fix the punctuation. No quotation marks, no period.

In Looking For, an MMF is very different from an MFM. The middle letter is the person being concentrated on and since you're listed as straight, I suspect you want an MFM. Also, if you're going to toggle an interest in single women, say something about them.

I'm torn about the flirting thing. I mean, yeah, I can see it, but you're a single guy and not every couple is down with that.

In Description, you don't need your age, but you do need to give a better sense of you. Right now, there isn't much of a reason to be attracted to you. Everyone is unique - and if they weren't, monogamy wouldn't be so rough - so what are some of the things that make you so? What do you like to do? Any interests, hobbies, beverages of choice? Just enough so that you don't sound like the appliance repair guy, where dependability is the big thing.

The rest is okay or better, so nice job.

Other than that, you still haven't corrected your punctuation. Your phone is not going to help with that, so run a grammar check.

Good luck.

Looking for more feedback! Anyone else want to take a shot?

My profile has been updated but I haven’t had time to do the pics yet. Please review and provide feedback.

Wonderful feedback! I am going to start tweaking it today.

Hi. First, in answer to your question, on every profile you look at, there's a block of labeled icons. If you click on the skeleton key - marked as Private - it will give that profile access to your private gallery. Of course you have to have photos loaded into that gallery, but that's how others are given permission to access it.

As far as your profile, let me first make it clear that everything is about the profile and the impression it makes. The advice you'll get here is really blunt, but it's kindly meant.

So, first, photos. Yours aren't great. The two in the bathroom are particularly bad. It's really better if you have someone else take photos. but another option is a tripod (I hear they're cheap) and the timer on your phone. Interesting backgrounds and clothes that fit will work in your favor.

Your tagline should invite people to open your profile. Yours doesn't do that. Try short and clever instead, or short and sincere.

Your age range, from young enough to be your child to less than 10 years older, will cause eyerolls from women. Feel free to turn down women you feel are too old, but it's a better look to not have your own age near the top of your preferred age range.

Looking For isn't really as informative as you might think. What does it mean to "truly live the lifestyle?" Since that's not going to be clear to anyone, you've missed your chance for others to see themselves here. The "...or whatever the couple chooses to do" portion should probably get lost, because instead of sounding flexible, it sounds passive, which isn't something most couples are looking for in a third.

In Description, you should purge anything that's already in your toggles, stats and photos. So, your age, build, height, gender, etc. The passive construction of "people would describe me" can also go, replaced by a declarative sentence, along with the last two sentences, which don't need to be replaced.

That notation about being super clean! and expecting the same from couples is...odd. I mean, you're an adult, right? People expect you to show up to every meeting showered and smelling good and they do the same, without your encouragement. Unless you're hinting that swingers are generally dirty and you're only interested in clean ones? Whatever the reason, it's both condescending and weird and can go.

Also, before I forget, I'm not going to correct it, because that's what software is for, but your punctuation is frequently incorrect. Please use a good spelling and grammar program on your next iteration.

Fantasies is okay, although by saying your biggest pleasure is giving oral it could give rise to concern that you aren't into fucking. Also, you needn't talk about not being into pain and since you've already said you're open to couples' (note the apostrophe) fantasies, the last line is redundant.

If you have any experience in threesomes, it should go here.

Additional comments snakes back into condescending territory, with the way you've phrased the first sentence. Try taking a positive tack and winding it into Looking For instead. I'm looking for discreet (not discrete), upfront couples...

I'd leave off the drama thing too, since that's usually an indication that the individual or couple who mentions it is, in fact, full of drama.

The rest of the section is fine and welcoming.

I hope others come by and give their read, but that's mine. Good luck. Make whatever changes seem good to you and then come back for another round, please.

What does opening face pics mean? I don’t want to open them to the public. How do I just open it for a couple I message?

I opened my profile to females as well.

Actually, you have single women blocked (in spite of what it says, you can't express zero interest without blocking), so I can't help. If you show a sliver of interest for a day or so, I can guarantee you won't be swarmed by messages from women.

However, if you're messaging people without opening your face pics, you're probably getting even fewer responses than you would otherwise.

I am looking for feedback on my profile. I like to tell couples I will send a face pic upon request.