Thank you both for your help!
I struggle with the photos. I don't have that artistic eye, so to me I just look me. Hopefully someone can give me specific help on which ones should stay and which should go.
I think that all other changes I have incorporated. Thank you for the spelling and grammar assistance. English is my second language, so sometimes there is a struggle there.
"...although I predict they might be brutal"
Oh, good, you read some other threads. That will save me the time I would otherwise have to spend carefully explaining how it was about your profile and not you and yada yada. ;-)
Your current profile isn't terrible, but I'm seeing evidence of man hands on it, so I'm guessing this isn't the purest version devised by those four women. Anyway, it's a solid C.
First, your photos. They're a combination of adorable and wtf. In some, you look half your actual age or like the pasty reincarnation of Alfalfa. I think you can do better, but I'll leave it to Velma to say how.
Your certs are fantastic. They make it so you needn't say anything about your appearance or your skills, which is pretty much a perfect condition.
Your tagline not so much. What was wrong with the old you? Because, yes, that's a potential response to what you have. I'm not saying you just got out of rehab (you can blame Amy Winehouse for that, because she's complaining about rehab in my living room at this very moment), but your current tagline does give rise to speculation that doesn't serve you.
In Looking For, the first line doesn't belong there. I'm not certain it belongs anywhere, but it does display a reassuring sort of approach to the female orgasm, so if you're going to keep it, put it in Additional comments. If you eliminate that and turn your laundry list into a paragraph instead of bullet points, that would be a great start.
The things you aren't looking for don't belong in your profile at all. How many drama prone pushy people do you know who have the self awareness to own that they're drama prone and pushy? Right. So, don't bother. By illegal, I'm assuming you mean 420 rather than bank robbery, and people are generally polite enough to check in before lighting up a blunt, so just say no. And, again, it doesn't need to be in your profile. The line about sharing is good, but it belongs in Fantasies.
Description is meant to be a description of you. The opinions of others aren't germane. Who are you from the inside? What do you like to do when you aren't fucking? You've got a decent chunk of the outside stuff, but not much of the internals, at least not without referencing the opinions of others. Don't bother describing your appearance, because your photos show the relevant details. The thing about sugar being tough is kinda charming in intent, except it has a syntax error or typo that renders it meaningless.
Also, saying you're a dom and later that you're open to light BDSM is a bit of a contradiction. Do you mean you are dominant in the bedroom? Fine, you can say that (although one of your certs says it better), but a dom is something rather different and wouldn't stop at light play. Also, a sex swing has nothing to do with kink.
Fantasies is good, but I think it might scan better (or at least be less obvious a grammatical error) if it was "Safely. Yes, I use condoms for everyone."
In Additional comments, it's "where it's easier" and just go toss that University and all other institutions nonsense on the pyre of stupid internet legends and light it on fire. Seriously, burn it to a crisp.
See, that wasn't so bad.
Anyway, good luck and make sure once you collect opinions, make changes and get them approved by SLS that you go in and change your smoking and drinking toggles.
After about four years with my old profile, I got the itch today to do a complete rewrite and fresh pictures. My last profile was written with the assistance of four swinger wives over drinks at a party several years back and it served me well, but I felt it was time to refresh.
Since I don't have those four women with me, would love some opinions from here, although I predict they might be brutal :)
Cheers and thanks in advance!
