Profile help

Bridgetender is exactly right - you needn't fix anything, because it isn't broken. Instead, the idea is for your profile to give an accurate reflection of who you are in a way that appeals to others and gets you the kind of sex you want. Having others weigh in can help show the gap between who you are and how you've temporarily shown up in your profile. And later, as things shift and change, you change your profile again, to reflect those changes.

I really do think you'll be terrific at this, with as many opportunities as you want.

Kelly, I don’t usually offer profile advice because, regardless of life experience, a SM’s advice isn’t often sought after, and in this case, you’re already getting advice from people who know what they’re talking about.

I will however, offer one thought, you used the word “fix” in your last post; please don’t look at your profile as broken and in need of fixing. Look at it as a work in progress that, even after taking Velma, Phoebert’s Wife, and GGMM’s advice, you might revise/tweak, add-on to, and possibly, scrap and wholly rewrite over time.

While there are quite a few universal best practices, there are many ways to craft a successful profile. In the end, what works for some, doesn’t work for others. There’s no one way to succeed. That’s what makes this whole thing so interesting and fun...and for some, frustrating as hell.

Good luck,

BT

Thank you all! We are going to get busy on fixing our profile and will let you know when its updated.
Thanks again,
Kelly

Hi Kelly (and Mark). You've gotten the disclaimer from PAW, so I won't repeat it. I do want to emphasize that our intentions are benign even if the commentary seems harsh.

So, first, I have a preference for submissive women and based on your tagline, I'd stay the hell away from you, because it just makes you sound like a lazy lover. There is a difference between submission and being a pillow princess and I get nothing of interest from the latter. So, going with the notion that you're not a lazy pillow princess, how about you change your tagline? Go for short and clever or short and sincere, but stay away from anything that tells people what you're looking for. You want to entice them to open your profile and learn more about you.

Follow Velma's photo advice, because it's gold. Right now, your photos are designed to appeal to men, but women are the deciders, so you need to appeal to them instead. So, photos of the two of you as a couple, in well fitting clothing, wearing pleasant expressions on your faces are going to be a huge step up. And to be extremely blunt, watch your expression. You might need to take 200 photos to get four good ones, but it will be worth it, because right now you have 21 photos in your public gallery and two thirds of them show you with a less than friendly face. I'm not telling you to smile the way a guy would, I'm telling you smiling makes people look appealing and you should do that.

In Looking For, you've used the "in the bedroom" cliche and it would be better if you didn't. I mean, I might have most sex on a bed, but some of the most fun times haven't been in a bedroom at all. So, instead of using a signifier for pedestrian sex, use more interesting language if you can. Also, it's women rather than "females," for reasons of grammar; SLS gets it wrong, but you don't have to. Also, it's dominant and if you mean 'dominant with her' then say that, because that's a substantially different thing than dominating a couple.

In Description, please don't talk about sex. I know what kind of site this is, but we're all here to fuck and that's the least interesting, least individual thing about all of us. So, instead of eliciting the 'oh, look, a couple that wants to fuck' response, tell us about yourselves. What are some of the thing you like to do? Have you been together for five decades? Like motorcycles? Care to explain the nerd reference in your profile name? This is the place for all of that.

Fantasies is the place for a somewhat recycled version of what you need to move out of Description. And speak about the two of you as a couple here instead of making us guess what his role is while she takes center stage. Wind in what you have in Additional comments because, again, it's all about sex at the moment and that all belongs in Fantasies.

Instead, end on a high note, one that makes us want to at least say yes to a drink or coffee.

Does all that make sense?

Take a crack at making changes and then please come back and let us help you refine things. I think you'll have a great time at this, but your profile could use work.

Good luck.

Hey there - I hope you've read other reviews because those who help here tend to be rather outspoken about what we like to see in a profile. Just remember that everything said is about your profile, not you personally.

Most of the problem with your profile is that you concentrate on sex only - almost everything in your profile really belongs in the Fantasies/Experience section. Looking for "Generic profile advice" written by Mayhem8 - it covers most of the common advice that I get tired of repeating (thanks Mayhem). For general photo help read Velma's advice at the top of the Better Profiles forum.

In no particular order the biggest specific things I noticed about your profile:

no weight listed for her - many people will not even look at your profile if you don't list a weight or if the weight listed doesn't reflect what they see in your pictures.

excessive similar or duplicate photos - delete the duplicates and pick the best of the similar ones

pained expression (concentration perhaps?) in a lot of the selfies - selfies are generally not a good look so have your husband take your picture so you can concentrate on smiling

using dominate and dominant interchangeably

personally I hate the he said/she said format but you've done it better than most so if you keep it then I'd move it to another section - it contains almost no description of y'all and it's the entirety of the Description section

Let us know when you're updated profile is approved if you want additional advice - there's not really much to review right now.

Good luck, have fun and stay safe!

~Phoebert's Wife

I’m going to say some stuff that you might not like. Please don’t take it personally. I just want you to be successful.

I opened a private gallery to show you the kinds of pictures you should have.

A couple of red flags pop up regarding your profile.

The first problem is that some of your pictures are sideways or not formatted correctly.

Smart is sexy. If you don’t know how to rotate a picture, I’m probably not going to be interested In meeting you face-to-face.

You also have a second problem with the spelling of “dominant.” Please fix that.

You have way too many pictures - never have more than 10. Follow my rules on what pictures to take. Don’t take three pictures of the same leather pants in three different positions.

You only have a limited amount of space to make an impression I can always think about what kind of impression you’re trying to make.

Remember that your profile is a résumé for sex - Would you go to a job interview dressed the way you were dressed in your pictures?

The Male Half… Well, he wouldn’t look out of place on Gold Rush Alaska. A beard trim or a shave, and some clothes that fit would do wonders.

Plenty of women reject men with beards, but very few women would ever reject a clean shaven man because he is clean shaven. If the guy wants to keep a scraggly beard, that’s fine, but it will reduce the number of women who are interested.

Put in accurate weights - I don’t mess around with people who are 0 pounds.

Make the picture changes that I suggest in my private gallery and re-post so we can review again.

Hi. Me and Mark dont seem to stand out in anyway can we get some pointers? All help would be greatly appreciated! Thank you in advance!
Kelly