Not doing poorly, but let's tweak it!

I appreciate every bit of feedback.i getting! Thank you.... really!

Hey, you got the Velma pass on bad photos based on your chest. You're most certainly somewhere between 1 and 10. ;-)

Not sure if you actually want another review, but, hey, I have some time. ;-)

Terrific tagline. I'm not sure it will make other people laugh, but it worked for me.

So, in Looking For, you used two words that I'm going to take exception to. The first is "clean," which indicates you think that unless you specify otherwise, dirty people will contact you. Or that most swingers are dirty. You might want to rethink it.

"Fit" is another one. We want what we want, but many women can be weird about their bodies. I'll spare you the entire conversation, but I was talking to a woman yesterday who described her body as squishy. She might not see herself in your description, even though she's a fitness instructor and instead of actually being squishy, she's a tiny, very fit woman who doesn't actually weigh much. And that was about the 700 billionth time I've had a variation of that discussion with women I thought had beautiful bodies, because see above about weird.

So, using that particular description might shrink your pool of potential playmates unnecessarily, leaving out every woman who thinks she has a fat roll behind her left knee or that her one stretch mark means she can never let anyone see her stomach again or some other piece of personal insecurity. Maybe substitute active, which has fewer trappings.

In Description, you still aren't saying anything about yourself as a human that isn't related to sex, so I'm thinking that might be intentional. You might eventually want to open up more and add a few interests, because that increases the charm factor in men's profiles.

In Fantasies, it's probably better to not say you aren't choosy. I know what you actually mean, but maybe just say you're open to it?

In Additional comments, you need to capitalize "let's" or the syntax is off.

And that's all I have. You're clearly more than a nice chest. Good luck.

I had a bit of a giggle over it.

Obviously proofreading your own work is a bit iffy (don't read my last post here too carefully - OK?).

Oh shit. Reins.

Just took a quick look and don't have much time but two things jump out at me.

There's still precious little information about you as a person.

And the look up the meaning of reigns and reins. ;-)

With everyone's help, I'm sure to be promoted to something within the 1-10 scale! Ha!

Heh. No, you aren't, but in this case zero iequals null, not less than one on a scale of 1-10.

I may not be a 10 but I'm no Zero!

One definition of cipher is zero. ;-)

Pulled those pics that Molly recommended go to the bin... but what's a "cipher"? Besides encryption, of course...

I think MsMolly phrased it well - "...not much to attract anyone for whom a nice chest isn't enough..." and only you can decide if you are attracting the sort of playmates you want.

Maybe placing your location information first in Description and phrasing it something like "in the process of moving from xxx to yyy by 2025 so location will vary" and then be sure to change your location on SLS accordingly. It's more work but might make it easier for others to figure out where you are. And if I had more coffee in me I might be able to phrase it better but I'm sure you get my drift.

~Phoebert's Wife

Just need to work on pics now... edits are standing by for approval. Thanks again for the feedback!

Velma, your husband is smart, funny and hot. If you want conversation with your sex, you have Shaggy.

Great advice from all of you, thank you!
I actually have bad that problem where someone was just too confused about the location to even pursue it. And I'll work on the wording... I do love to get right after it, but it's not because I can't have a conversation. Be back after the edits...

Yeah, he has selfies but I think when your body looks like good you really have some wiggle room.

This is the kind of guy who I would probably fuck within a couple of minutes of meeting him- Mainly because I wouldn’t want him to speak and ruin things.

So I think a guy like that has a purpose and a utility. I am willing to give him a pass on the pictures.

Hi. I'm going to say seemingly mean things about your profile. Try to roll with it. I promise that my intentions are benign.

I know you say you're doing well, and I'm glad of that, but I think the current iteration means you hit the middle ground of possibilities and others are noping out, pretty much right away, in favor of men who have greater presence. Because right now, there's nothing wrong with what you have, but there's also not much to attract anyone for whom a nice chest isn't enough. I mean, clearly you're doing fairly well based on your certs and Velma didn't point out that you had two out of five really unappealing photos (2 and 5), but currently I'd pass you by unless you sent a really dynamite introductory message and even then my response would be pretty lukewarm.

Since I don't actually believe you're a cipher, I have some suggestions.

First, your tagline could use cliche removal surgery. The don't be shy, I/we don't bite thing turns up way too often. Instead, find something catchy and short and don't be afraid to steal from profiles a thousand miles from you.

In Looking For, if moving to Georgia is going to take 6-8 years and you want to keep seeing people in Florida, particularly if you're mostly there, use Fernandina Beach as your location and just note somewhere in Additional comments that you're often in Hartwell and actively looking for playmates there as well. You don't need to offer quite so much specific information on this.

For the rest, rework it so you use complete sentences and then center things around those fun, discreet couples and women. This is not the place for you to say how long you've been doing this.

The place for that is in Description. Which is good, because that section needs filling out. Like, hey, terrific that you're physically fit and clean (if you mean disease free, you've already said that and if you mean you shower regularly, so do most adults and it needn't be noted, so it can go), but I know nothing about you. Since like many women and couples, I receive a lot of introductory messages from strangers, I'm not going to spend time trying to dig out of you whether there's any chance of a connection.

A good description - and it needn't be long or particularly detailed - gives enough information that people reading have a sense of the kind of person you are. What are some of your interests? What's something that's important to you. If you had just five seconds to describe yourself in a way that got you sex, what would you say? Give a taste of the unique individual that occupies your body.

What doesn't belong in this section is the second paragraph. It goes in Additional comments, which is good, because there's no reason to give up a chance to say something and end on a high note. The only change I'd make is to take out that semi-sinister "privately."

In Fantasies, lightly touch on some of your experiences and something about any fantasies you might have. It isn't indiscreet to do so, because the idea is that here is another place where you can charm and connect with people. You're currently missing that opportunity.

And that's all I have right now, because there isn't a ton to work with. I hope you make some changes and then come back and let us take another look to refine things.

Good luck.

I hope that you've read other reviews and realize that most of us are rather blunt about the advice we give. We aren't trying to be mean - just pointing out what we think could be causing you problems connecting with the people you are looking for. Remember that this is all about your profile, not you personally.

Your profile really doesn't say much. I get no inkling of what kind of guy you are. I'm somewhat confused by your explanation of your location when compared to the location in your stats. You're looking for ladies and couples but what sort of relationship do you want - one & done, FWB, something ongoing? You really need to provide information that fits the header for each section - Looking For should be about others not about where you live, Description should be about your personality and interests not an invitation to single ladies to chat privately about their preferences, Fantasies/Experiences should be about what you have enjoyed in the past and still want to try. And leaving Additional Comments blank implies you don't finish things.

I'm surprised Velma didn't recommend getting some non-selfie pictures - all selfies makes it look like you have no friends. Her DEBauCH system is great for core pictures for your public gallery - look for another review where she explains the three pictures you need. Most friends and many strangers will take a picture if you ask. Remember to smile and watch for clutter or visual chaos in the background.

I get the feeling that you are probably a more interesting guy that your profile implies. But right now I'm not sure if you would have a shirt on when you show up to meeting or would be able to hold up your end of a conversation.

Let us know when your updated profile has been approved if you want additional advice.

Good luck and have fun!

~Phoebert's Wife

Beta Male < Alpha Male

I don't know what beta means, but I've read more than one reply that recommended 86ing the LOLs etc... Thanks!

I wouldn’t change much. Maybe sign up for a 5K and have someone take a picture of you in a race bib.

I would personally veto you because of the smiley :-) and the LOL.

Take that out. It’s beta as fuck.

I have a fair amount of traffic and have experienced everything from blocks to outright begging to meet... I'm not complaining but let's see if there are opportunities that I am missing? Thanks in advance!