Sorry MsMolly - don't want to count you out!
Every time I see the default 18-99 age preference I just think there was a lack of follow through. When I finally took a good look at our own profile and realized Phoebert hadn't tweaked the age preference I raised the lower end. I left it pretty wide since we can always decline but tried to think realistically about the low end.
And if it wouldn't open us up to even more sexa/septua/octo/nonagenarian IM's, we'd change our preferences to 97 just to keep GGMM in the pool.
Disclaimer applies:
Ditto to GGMM and PAW's comments, particularly on the pics, every single word about drama and the Sydney nonsense.
"Who doesn't need..." would read better as "After all, who doesn't need..."
I'd say HWP versus "working off a beer belly". Avoid self-deprication
As far as the overall feel, there's too many "bullet points" which makes it feel like a PowerPoint presentation. Make paragraphs if you can combine thoughts, elaborate on the single lines with a second line if that works better for you, but try to get rid of the PowerPoint feel. It's definitely a professional presentation, but that's at odds with the casual feel your pics and text provide. A great majority of people read profiles with their "No" card in hand, looking for a reason to play it. Contradictions like this can therefore cause some folks to slap that card on the table and move on to the next.
You might want to elaborate on "giving pleasure to him and her". There's so damn many flavors of bi these days that you might broaden your pool with couples seeking bi-men if you explain you're orally bi, top, bottom, switch, you just don't care who's giving you the blowjob, or you're more "go with the flow" and allow the moment to dictate your play boundaries. This is one area where a lack of specificity may allow folks to fill in the blank themselves with the wrong information and make you a "No" when the right information would have made you a "Yes".
Hope this helps!
"...why would you leave the default of 18 to 99 in place."
Speaking as a 97 year old, I like to think people are just being really open minded about age. ;-)
MsMolly pretty well covered it - I just have a few nit-picky thoughts to add.
You might want to minimize or eliminate the lines about drama. Those that bring drama don't believe it is them so you're just wasting space and making others wonder if you bring the drama.
Maybe tighten up your age preferences. Everything else about your profile indicates that you pay attention to details - why would you leave the default of 18 to 99 in place.
And add a picture where you're dressed up just a bit. Like how you'd meet someone for the first time when you're trying to make a good impression. Nice jeans and a polo shirt is fine if casual is your style.
Then read MsMolly's advice again and pretend I said it also. But really your profile is better than many - except for those stupid warnings.
Good luck and have fun!
~Phoebert's Wife
Hi. Your profile isn't terrible. And, yeah, that is a compliment.
I'm going to be very blunt about the shortcomings though. Please understand that it's about your profile though and not a referendum on you personally. I actually want you to get laid.
So, first, get rid of the photo of you flipping off the viewer. Not the message you want to send.
As soon as you've done that, get rid of that ridiculous piece of Sydney University garbage in Additional comments. It marks you as gullible, which I doubt is the look you're going for.
Substitute something charming and upbeat.
In your tagline, don't capitalize bi or pansexual.
And there's an error in the sentence where you talk about having a piercing in your cock.
Normally I'd suggest you remove any discussion of your cock, but you're long and you have a piercing, which is a recipe for cystitis for many women, including me. So, keep it in there as fair warning.
Otherwise, good luck. Collect opinions, make changes, and then please come back for a review.
As the subject says. Honest feedback on my profile please.
