Advice, please.

Heh. And just for that, I'll go ahead and hang my thong on the elk next time I'm there. I'll blame you. ;-)

Thank you, Molly!!
And now I want to walk around and keep a thong in my pocket, to hang on antlers every time I see them. I live in the middle of Louisiana, and everyone except for us has a deer head hanging in their house. We honestly don't, just because he hasn't shot one yet... I'm going to go put some thongs that I don't wear, in my purse. And when I do it, and someone says something to me, I'll just exclaim, 'Good golly miss molly!!' And leave it at that xo

Good to know about the taxidermy. It's clearly not a deal breaker for me (although I generally have to repress the urge to hang my undies and jewelry on the massive elk head right outside the bedroom door at my friends' home), but it's not a great look for photos. ;-)

We definitely don't want your husband's feelings hurt. But maybe if you think of the suit comment as being a kind of stand in for the way others will mine your text and photographs for reasons to say no, it will make more sense to you and give you some cues for future photographs.

I actually do not have any Taxidermy in the house haha. And I know that the pictures aren't perfect. But it's who we are, the pictures in the gallery of him in the plaid shirt and all of the things on the bookcase behind us. And he does hunt and fish. And I agree completely about the conservation comment! I think we will probably end up looking for long-term friends in this lifestyle? So I would rather people know who we are, right off the bat.

I did delete it! I didn't want my husband to see it and get his feelings hurt. The suit was from a Prohibition type ball that we went to. He was a gangster, and I was a flapper. It actually does fit him well, but he had his arm around me for the picture. I appreciate all the advice and I'm glad I came back to read it. You guys are incredibly nice! And also incredibly wise. Thank you so very much!

If you live in a rural area or enjoy hunting and fishing please do not eliminate it from your profile. There are plenty of other people out there that will share your interests - that is what it's all about after all.....finding a good match.

However I completely agree with the no taxidermy pictures :) that is a huge turn off!!

I don't like guns and have refused to go hunting since I was 15. Nevertheless, that didn't even make me blink and if hunting is a hobby, I think it's fine to put it in. But, yeah, even if, like a couple I play with, your walls are covered in taxidermy, that's pretty much a no for photos.

OP, I noticed you deleted your initial post and I'm sorry for it. I think we all know how exposed and vulnerable this process can make people feel. PAW got told their profile was reminiscent of an episode of Criminal Minds and while I don't remember what I got told, it was enough to make me disclose in public, for any number of people to read, something even my friends don't know, which is that I'm a fetish model. Plus, I'm still struggling with how to usefully incorporate the advice.

It's why there's a disclaimer. It's both to prepare people for the seeming harshness and to make it clear that everything is about the profile and how others might be reacting.

I strongly disagree with lying or being deceptive in profiles.

I suggest you not change “hunting” to “conservation”. The fact that you hunt is not an automatic turn off for me even though I don’t like it. It’s easy enough to avoid the topic if we met.

What would turn me off is if we met and I asked what kind of conservation you do since it’s something I’m passionate about. If you replied with “I hunt and fish”, suddenly it becomes awkward. As a conservationist I don’t consider killing as conservation and would be turned off.

It’s fine to say you hunt in your profile, however putting pictures in your profile of you with your guns or with dead animals would be a bad idea.

Or, you can leave out that you enjoy hunting altogether unless you are looking for swingers to go on hunting trips with you.

~rabbit ~

Now that I look at the picture again, you were probably at some 1920's or prohibition themed party, Still, that shouldn't be your first picture.

Now that I look at it harder, I'm going to say something that may sound mean, but I'm going to say it anyway because I want you to be successful.

The guy's suit doesn't fit. The jacket is way too tight. This, combined with the beard, makes me question whether his weight is accurate. To illustrate, my husband is 195lbs -the same weight as you claim to be- and he's a triathlete. Your profile says "He prefers HWP"... Um... I'm sorry, man. To me, this feels like the profile of a guy who married a skinny girl and thinks this automatically makes him hot.

I would also suggest you take out the parts about "hunting." Hunting means that you own guns, and that will freak out tourists from the coastal states like me. Maybe change it to "he loves the outdoors and conservation."

Make the changes to the text and pictures and repost.

I opened a private gallery for you so you can see the kind of pictures you should have.

Like Ms, Molly said, choose to expose your faces or don't, but don't do this half and half shit.

You are on the right track with your pictures just by the fact that you two are dressed nicely in the first one and it has both the male and female. But both pictures have to be replaced. There is shit in the background in the first picture. I'm not sure if that is your home or a photo shoot, but liquor bottles on the floor makes me think you two are a bunch of drunks. In the second picture, the guy is wearing a Carhart shirt. Like... that's the absolutely best he can do? If we roll in for a date, is she going to be dressed nicely and he's wearing Dickies?

Follow my advice that I have in my gallery. You need 5 core pictures and I guarantee these core pictures will improve results.

No, I can see it. The flyover just hasn't been updated yet.

Hi there. Constructive is in the eye of the beholder, but it's rare that anyone comments in Better Profiles with any but the best of motives. Wanting others to succeed is pretty much the underpinning, but, yes, the advice is very, very blunt and meant to highlight the opinions of those who open your profile and then close it without contacting you, even though you'd probably like them. The idea is to reduce those instances.

So, first, I don't usually comment on photos unless they're bathroom selfies, but I will this time. Your faces are visible in one of your two public photos but covered in the other, plus you stress the need for others to open their face photos. Twice. I'm quite puzzled by all of that and am probably not alone in my confusion. Please pick a side and if you choose to obscure your faces, then you'll need to figure out how to deal with your desire to see people's faces immediately when they can't see yours.

Also, yes, it's awkward to say, oh, hey, you look interesting, can I see your face, oh, oops, sorry, we'll pass, but if that's the most awkward rejection you hand out while swinging, you'll be a very lucky couple. Learning to say no is a very valuable skill, so you might as well practice early and often, if you can.

Looking For is a bit of a head scratcher. Like, nice sentiment, but that's not what I want with a playmate, unless it's a very special one. Plus, I have no idea what or who you're looking for, although misplaced in Description is your desire to only play with single men if they're bi, so that can move up, but what about couples? Do you care if the male half is straight? Do you want to just meet once and notch the bedpost or are you also looking for something akin to friendship? That's the information that goes in this section, phrased in such a way that it invites others to see themselves.

In Description, the section that runs from "Since we are new..." to "...taking some time. Thanks!" doesn't belong here. Shove it into Additional comments instead, if you can't find enough time to just clear out your inbox. Pro tip: most of those deserve nothing more than "Thanks, but we wouldn't be a match. Good luck in your search." response.

The EDIT TO ADD is cute, but it doesn't need the all caps preface and you needn't explain anything after the first sentence. The rest of it is unnecessary fluff. Plus, you're adorable and why not be Barbie and Ken with a bit of a wink and a nod?

So, that leaves your last two paragraphs, which are fine, but need an extra blank line between them and maybe a little more about the two of you as a couple. What do you like to do together? What suits both of you?

Fill Fantasies out. If you don't have any experience say so, but this is a chance to appeal to others who either share or would like to help you fulfill your fantasies. They can't if you leave that section blank.

I've already mentioned part of the problem with your must have face photos approach. The other is that you're trying to eliminate a way of eliminating people. Why? Not everyone will suit you, so why not just thanks but no thanks people without photos without trying to change how they do things?

Anyway, thanks again for opening your profile. I hope you collect a lot of opinions, make whatever changes work for you, and then come back for a review.

Good luck!

You're still not open for single ladies - you need to show an interest level of "maybe" for them to see your profile. The "no interest but profile visible" doesn't work as advertised.

And you're very welcome - just remember to apply our advice as it makes sense to you. We're just trying to let you know how it looks to others and ways to attract the attention you want.

Thank you, Phoebert's wife! I appreciate it! :)

I hope you've read other profile reviews - we tend to be a bit blunt and it may sound horribly mean. Just remember that it is all about your profile and not about you personally.

Either obscure your faces all the time or never. Otherwise I like the pictures you have. You may want to add a beach/pool photo to show off your bodies and a few casual photos doing fun things.

You want to put information in each section based on the section header. Currently most all of your information is in Description. The line you have in Looking For would work better as a tag line (but it's probably too long). Your edit about your screen name should either be at the beginning or end of Description (rather than the middle) or moved to Additional Comments (and there's no need to label it as an edit - no one keeps track). Looking For should include information about the single gentlemen or couples that you hope to meet and what sort of relationships you prefer (one -time encounters, on-going FWB. etc). Fantasies/Experience should tell us what you've experienced and might like to try again and what you'd like to try for the first time - leaving it blank is wasting a chance to encourage people to contact you. Description should not include information in your stats and should be more vanilla than sexy - you have a good start so just clean it up and maybe expand it a bit.

I hope you open your profile to single women while you're looking for advice - MsMolly and some of the other ladies are really good at profile reviews. I'm better with the single guys than I am with couples!

Let us know if you want additional advice after you've made some changes. Good luck & have fun!

~Phoebert's Wife

I think I opened it correctly, Molly. Thanks so much for your feedback, now! Sorry about that. I didn't know.

Hi. Your profile is blocked to single women, so I can't see it. I know SLS appears to give you the choice to show no interest but not block particular categories, but that's not actually the case. No interest = blocked.

Anyway, if you want to change to a sliver of interest (the chance of a woman sending you an email are slightly less than being hit by a meteor), I can help. Otherwise, there are a number of other posters who might be around.