I think when younger we all may be on the 1 end of the scale however as we age many migrate up the scale. While maybe not all the way to poly, at least to regular vs nsa. There are times when nsa is exciting, but other times when consistency has value
We think it would be a great idea. We’ve done a lot of the one time deals and it got really old really quick. Now we want people with substance that can be friends, fun, and repeats. The scale would help to eliminate the bed notchers for us.
Mayhem8
I’m with you, I know what you mean, I like it 100%, except we're afflicted with “we're different” syndrome, and we’re different at different times with different people, and at different times we have pleasurable experiences outside our preferences - what do we do, do I need 3 sliders?
On the 1-10 scale described earlier, our “General Preference" slider is somewhere between 5-7. We like FWBs with a poly influence, and avoid lover’s with u-haul’s. We like the heightened comfort of repeat play with FWB and IMO, the sex is wilder, more open, and varied.
Our “Summer Preference" slider’s different. We're on a clothing optional resort all summer and we never know who we might bump into, so to speak. For some, days with a couple on a clothing optional resort is a relaxing intro to NSA 101. We call it semi-knowing who we’re fucking. In summer we’re solid 1-3’s
Our “Vanilla Vacation slider stays at 1. We sail on vanilla cruises where couples don’t call what we do swinging, they call it a wild vacation - like NASCAR. We meet couples on vanilla vacations and swinging happens. It's NSA sex with new FWBs - if that’s sensible?
What slider suggestion would you have for us?
The slide bar is an interesting idea, but it’s probably superfluous, assuming that you mention polyamory in your profile. Once you do that, most folks on the site will steer clear of you. Frankly, 6 and anything past it is complicated and potentially dramatic territory.
If FWBs is a 5, that’s about as far to the right as we would go.
The vast majority of the limited playing we’ve done has occurred at venues such as clubs, resorts, etc. like RnS, I’d measure that around a 1 or 2 situation.
We’ve also made more than a couple of friends, some from the forums, whom we value very highly. The thought of playing with them again remains appealing, but we’d cherish the friendships even if playing no longer was an option. That’s what I’m seeing as a 5 for us.
If 1 is nsa with a stranger and 10 is a live-in poly relationship, we would probably have to say we are a range of 1 to maybe 6 or 7.
For us, it depends on the people and the circumstances. At a club we may meet and play and never know their name but we have others who are close friends who we occasionally play with and the rest fall in between.
Not sure if my answer was helpful but that’s our take on it.
~Scamp
I have this vision of a slide bar. On one end is NSA sex and on the other is a poly relationship. Just a thought, but having something simple like that where you can adjust to where you roughly think you are on that scale would be helpful to find others like you. This is kind of what the site is for, right?
It may get a little fuzzy but I'm kind of thinking FWB is in the middle of this range. Being more towards one end or the other is kind of an indication of how intimate (or not) you may want to be with others. While the middle may be fuzzy, the closer to the ends would be a bit more telling. Even cooler would be if you could search/filter on this metric.
Just like a picture is supposed to be worth 1000 words, maybe something like this would be worth at least 250. Thoughts (other than perhaps the Website thread might be a better place for this)?
