Pet Peeves

Always get face pics before moving forward!

@888 no apologies necessary. In fact after reading your reply and a couple of others I can see where I may be misinterpreting the intent of the face pics open statements in profiles. I was looking at it as don’t contact us unless face pics are already open but I now see where the intent is more along the lines of if you contact us and we reciprocate with a reply please be ready to share face pics etc. Live and learn ??

BottomsUp: My apologies, reading that initial post makes it sound like after you read that in a profile, you’ll check out their pictures, see no face pics found and you’ll pass on them, which is expectation.

It’s all good, you explained well enough. Thanks!

~Allen

we have face pics on our profile, and expect people to open theirs when contacting us. while there are things that might interest us besides what you look like (personality etc) we still want to see the pics

@888 we don’t expect anything. Our profile makes no stipulation as to open face pics as a condition for contact. If it did, our face pics would be open. 2-way street type of thing.

We don't have face pics open to the public and we have that please have face pics open disclaimer in our profile. We always open face pics when reaching out to someone and expect to see your faces if you reach out to us first.

We don't expect to see face pics in public galleries.

“ We then look at their pictures and yup, no face pictures of them”

This qualifies for the “Just Wondering thread.

BottomsUp: They are asking for face pictures upon contact, yet you expect them to have face pictures published openly and/or privately before they know you are going to contact them?

~Allen

One of our pet peeves is a profile that reads “if you contact us please have full face pictures open”. We then look at their pictures and yup, no face pictures of them and usually no pictures at all of the male. I guess it’s a form of click bait to get profile views but those couples are a hard pass for us.

“I think most that put the "disclaimer" on their profile do so thinking there is no harm either way, but that's not always true. It shows a sense of gullibilty and, worse case, a lack of intelligence that would be enough for some others to steer clear of them.“

We had a couple at our house party last year. They were not the sharpest tools, and being relatively new to the lifestyle were probably gullible enough to have the disclaimer on their profile.
On the other hand, they were kind, considerate, lovely people. If they had the disclaimer, we’d still fuck them.

I'm mindful of just how fearsome King Theoden would have been had the battle cry at Pelennor Fields been something other than "Death!"

"Ride now, ride now, ride! Ride for ruin and the world's ending!
Taxes! Taxes! Taxes!
Forth Eorlingas!"

That would scare the shit out of me...

"You may find this difficult to believe, but not everyone has your personality and assumes that anything they read is a lie if they don't particularly care for who wrote it."

Please do not presume to know my personality, what I assume and why I assume it. There are people here I mostly disagree with I actually like, and vice versa.

Yes, there are posters whose every comment I assume is a lie, but that is because, well, most if not all of their comments are lies.

"Many people are able to read things and go on about life without a confrontation, challenges, name-calling and demands of proof. They say "yeah, right" and scroll right past, no research required."

So am I, but I choose to call out bullshit when I see it, or demand proof for something that sounds like it, or challenge opinions I disagree with. Scrolling past it would not be, what's the word, a discussion.

Also, I don't recall calling anyone names on these fora.

"The entire Sydney University bit was propagated on that exact premise"

70-100+ words of pseudo-legalese that makes no sense on several levels does not qualify as a "little bit" or a "phrase". Hell, for many profiles that have it, it comprises the majority of the profile.

"and usually began with the phrase "You need to place this on your page for your protection" or something similar."

Not only are you babbling on about stupefyingly obvious things that everyone here knows and nobody even remotely argued with; you're specifically doing it to someone who saw it at it's origin when it was novel... which is what, 10-15 years ago, probably more -- AND just linked to a page that included an example; you don't even care to be accurate.

"It's a joke"

On the originating site, it was a near-panic. None of the several dozens of people with the blurb on their profile I've talked to about it thought it was a joke (many venomously defend(ed) its validity and authenticity, even) (I don't bring it up anymore, just move on). Nobody in this thread seems to think so.

"[...] pull the stick outta your ass. You come across as frothing at the mouth constantly, you'll probably have a stroke. And seriously, if you actually believe that you're more intelligent than anyone who's ever fallen for a hoax, you're not nearly as smart as you think you are."

The prevailing opinion is that I come across as an arrogant asshole, with occasional windbag tendencies. The "frothing at the mouth" bullshit is exclusive to those who have fully ceded the relevant argument and think tone trolling is clever. Trust me, this is from a large sample size -- I have been discussing things online for 28 years.

I fully admit that I have ceased being polite to you. Not merely because you are whiny, passive-aggressive and proudly ignorant. It is because you continuously argue in bad faith. You move goalposts "it's a fact!" "it's an opinion!" "it's a joke!". You beg the question continuously (first sentence). You attempt the most idiotic strawman arguments (final sentence). On and on and on. You are a guaranteed win at fallacy Bingo.

No, I do not believe I am "more intelligent than anyone who's ever fallen for a hoax" -- I never said anything of the kind. I fall for bullshit. I lost several hundred dollars to a fake outlet site just a few months ago. What I am trying to convey, if it isn't PAINFULLY obvious by now, is that you, I, everyone, can... hang on to your hat... look things up. You find that arrogant. Have you considered what that says about you?

Personally, we wouldn't rule people out for having that on their profile. Also, when I was new and saw exacctly that "for your protection, cut/paste blah, blah...." thing, I applied a little common sense. First off, why would ANYONE want to use our pictures compared to all of the more pretty people here? Even if they did, how would I know? As I recall, the TOS also said that SLS pretty much owns the pictures you post.

Beyond all of that, even if someone did use our pictures and I somehow found out, would I really want to out us in a court case, even if that were possible? No Googling was required in this case for me to know this was BS, but it's so easy just to cut/paste stuff that I can see others just saying, "WTF. Might as well, just in case".

You may find this difficult to believe, but not everyone has your personality and assumes that anything they read is a lie if they don't particularly care for who wrote it. Many people are able to read things and go on about life without a confrontation, challenges, name-calling and demands of proof. They say "yeah, right" and scroll right past, no research required.

I would go so far as to say "most" people.

Many people create a profile, look at other peoples profiles and plagiarize little bits and phrases all over because they like the way it sounds. The entire Sydney University bit was propagated on that exact premise and usually began with the phrase "You need to place this on your page for your protection" or something similar. A friend did it, then they did it, then someone else copied it from them, along with some very fine people on both sides, I'm sure.

It's a joke, pull the stick outta your ass. You come across as frothing at the mouth constantly, you'll probably have a stroke.

And seriously, if you actually believe that you're more intelligent than anyone who's ever fallen for a hoax, you're not nearly as smart as you think you are.

"we tend to avoid people that are so judgmental as to believe that other people are stupid because they copied & pasted something made up to look like an official disclaimer."

Love the phrasing: "made up to look like", because it is absolutely correct.

"Our PP is people that assume they're somehow automatically more intelligent or better educated than someone who disagrees with them."

Again with the feeble attempts at casting this as a matter of opinion. No, these are all matters of fact. We are talking about people who, obviously on someone's say-so or from seeing it on others' profiles, are copying a bunch of legalese into their profiles without doing any research. The legalese is stated as fact, and most people who have it on their profile believe it to be factual.

Let's assume I am new to the entire online thing, am told I should totes put that blurb in my profile, I just might google "sydney university profile pictures" (you know, just so I don't look like a complete jackass on my profile). When I do, the first relevant link (#9, in my case, YMMV) is this:

stereo-typed com/privacy_warning/

There are many, many more links saying the same if one cares to follow up, but this first one did it for me. So in under two minutes, I am better educated and more intelligent than people who put that bullshit on their profile. Not an opinion. Nothing automatic about it. It's called "looking shit up".

And that is researching the entire concept, which can be somewhat vague. As others have already pointed out, googling any of the statutes cited immediately shows it for the bullshit it is. Even simpler, even more factual, and even quicker.

"It shows a sense of gullibilty and, worse case, a lack of intelligence that would be enough for some others to steer clear of them."

Conversely, there are people that put something like that on their profile, we tend to avoid people that are so judgmental as to believe that other people are stupid because they copied & pasted something made up to look like an official disclaimer. Our PP is people that assume they're somehow automatically more intelligent or better educated than someone who disagrees with them.

I particularly like the ones where they cite statutes, none of which are applicable. It's totally okay to not know something - see xkcd's Lucky 10,000 - but to not check the factual information that is right there, numbers and all, falls into my inexcusable bucket and I judge that pretty harshly.

I think most that put the "disclaimer" on their profile do so thinking there is no harm either way, but that's not always true. It shows a sense of gullibilty and, worse case, a lack of intelligence that would be enough for some others to steer clear of them.

@888: fair enough.

I explained this to someone in meatspace the other day, and the futility of the clause only finally sank in when I bluntly said "so they want a crapload of pictures for some research... do you think they have interns right-click-Save-As on every one, after making sure there is no super-duper serious threat of legal action... or do you think maybe they automate that stuff?"

Fun "Fact" (fact in quotes because I might be mistaken)

There doesn't actually appear to be even such an institution as "Sydney University". There is a University of Sydney, and a Western Sydney University.

A lot of people don’t know what fair use, it’s applicabilitIes and limitations are.

~Allen

"I chuckle every time I see those disclaimers."

Not just the "let me revoke rights I gave away by agreeing to the TOS" bit, or "I don't know what fair use means", the implicit arrogance of "oh my god, they're going to use our pics to make money somehow". No offense, but... really? You think? Out of all the people on here, and on all other sites that show amateur nipple?

I feel for the people that live out in the boonies, but we would never drive even an hour to have the possibility of getting some strange...

step1 we call them virtual swingers...too bad theres not a way to certify them lol

WE have been burned same on SLS in beginning.. people are liars and fakes.. so now we IM, set up a meet locally at a bar/restaurant and then play.. any games we move on quickly..

No time for such childish games as many here play! Their loss!

I chuckle every time I see those disclaimers. There is so much misunderstanding of this subject it is hilarious. Probably somewhere deep buried in the TOS, you lost that right to sue anyone. Probably somewhere deep buried in the TOS they own the images now, not you. The fact that you posted a picture of you and your spouse standing in front of a sign at some party is an admission you were in public. Your right to privacy went out the window the minute you stepped outside. Now, at best, you could have a claim for copyright on the image. And if the image were used to make money, you could have a claim, especially if it was not attributed to you. However, see the first two points above. You probably already lost the ownership right to the image.

The Sydney institute can use what I wrote above, I don't give a fuck :)