Club etiquette

1) It’s not defensive to simply not wanting to hear armchair quarterbacking and advice to outing someone. Your wife tripping out isn’t and would not be hard proof someone roofied her, except to you because you know how much she has had and how well she handles it and what to look for. Where is the hard definitive proof before calling someone out? Obviously you feel there are no consequences to deal with to that affect after; we know differently, so think twice before naming names. It doesn’t matter what you feel we should have done; we feel we dealt with it in the properly best available way we could at that moment. Have a nice day.

2) Andrew, I mentioned it happening in vanilla as well. Please put the bottle away and read again before spewing more trash because it attracts the coprophagia of likes that posted after you. You called me a dumbass yet you don’t know what “as well” means in the context of including; now that’s fucking funny!

3) I came back because my psychic sense was tingling, sure enough,I have Scamptroll blocked..... again, yet feel something spewingly stupid was released from the opportunist’s yapper.

~Allen

Poor Allen, he is well known for making shit up then getting defensive when people have the nerve to ask for clarification. His wife likely had a bit too much to drink but that wasn't enough drama for someone who thrives on it.

But fear not, he will probably block you soon enough, he does that to everyone who excposes his inanity.

~Scamp

"…...however...…… I must point out you said the same thing a couple years back about no exposure to and finding it insulting about others listing their profiles off limits to scat, pee and such. Well, now you have one more "unheard-of" to add to your list of inexperiences, which makes your overall exposure seem somewhat limited or comforted, not sure which. It wasn't about scaring anybody, it was about warning others about turning their back to their drink so they could be cautious, as it does happen to people in regular clubs as well and is not limited to just those particular places."

That's right. People STILL put that ridiculous warning about not being interested in scat, pee, beastiality or pedophilia, AND I STILL HAVEN'T EVER BEEN OFFERED ANY OF THOSE THINGS EVEN THOUGH I DON'T SAY I'M NOT INTO THEM. After 14 fucking years, go figure.

Do I really have to say it after that stupid fucking reply? Now you're talking about regular vanilla clubs, WHICH THE OP'S QUESTION WAS NOT ABOUT!

They were asking about SWINGER CLUBS, dumbass! I've never heard about anyone getting roofied at a swinger club or any other swinger function. Think about it. How fucking stupid is it for some guy to roofie the wife of another guy who is with her at the club? Even if you are enough of a scumbag to want to do it, it's an idiotic move. Total waste of a perfectly good roofie pill.

No one's trolling you. You seem to just be taking offense for no reason. We are genuinely asking. Someone states they were drugged at a lifestlye evident, it's best to pay attention.

Why are you saying now you have no evidence? It was you retelling your story of how your wife was roofied. Despite your accusation that we didn't read, we just went back again and re-read where you clearly said "mrs 888eatme888 was roofied. You obviously feel you have enough evidence to state definitively she was roofied. You went on to state you pieced the puzzle together, again, implying the mystery was solved. But you don't have enough to say anything to the host or even friends?

Hostile? Defensive? lol Okay, I'll entertain your trolling one last time.

What's your resolution? Let's hear it? What evidence to use? You're going to out someone without evidence? You're female half is falling over, trippy slurring on two ounces of alcohol when you know she can handle 5X that amount without a hitch? Would you use her stomach bile she shortly later released? Is that my evidence you want me to use? Accusations without direct evidence is a no, no, no. I did what I needed to do to preserve us at the time of need. You insist on outing someone without direct evidence, that's just stupidity kicking in.

Nevermind……… Unsubscribed.

~Allen

Wow 888eatme888, why so hostile? Gotta be a reason you're getting so defensive.

We did read. We must have missed the part where you stated that you had relayed every single aspect of your story to such a degree that not a single detail was left out. That's our mistake, we suppose.

So if we understand correctly, you know exactly who drugged your wife, intentionally with nefarious intent, and you didn't even so much as alert the host, friends, others that might be unfortunate enough to cross paths with this individual in the future and potentially fall victim themselves? That's just as alarming as someone going around drugging people at lifestyle events! Wow again!

Should we have screamed in alarm? Should I have collected her throw up and presented it to the club owner as evidence?

It's evident you didn't read what happened: "I excused us from the other couple and led Mrs. 888 down a hall that led away....."

I believe I'm done wasting my time here.

~Allen

888eatme888, you have guessed wrong.

We don't know who would do something like that, however if all were conscious we'd imagine the party being accosted would be able to object themselves and raise the alarm that they were in a position they didn't want to be in.

Your wife was roofied not in a private setting but what sounds more like an organized event open to any that signed up. We've not been to a single event where we didn't have to at the very least provide some identifying information about who we are to the host. Along with your description of events you said you put the puzzle together which implies that you know who was responsible. What did you do about it? Did you let such an egregious offense stand without being challenged?

“Who's other half would allow their loved one to be taken advantage of while they were unconscious?”

Just guessing you kind folk must be same room same bed only. I have a couple answers to your question.

1) I would hope no one.

2) Roofies don’t necessarily put you out.

Why would anyone let their beloved half be taken advantage of while conscious?

~Allen

We're obviously late on the topic but to add to the others, don't be a wall flower. Get out among everyone and be approachable. Do not mistake attendance as permission...meaning don't assume you can go ahead and touch anyone else intimately just because they're there or you saw someone else touching them. Don't take out your cellphone in the middle of everyone. If you have to check it for whatever reason then leave the room and find a private corner. No means no. Don't take offense to being told no. Don't get sloppy drunk. Have no expectations other than to enjoy each others company and have fun with each other. Discuss and set limits together before you arrive. Have a great time. How did it go btw?

On the roofie front, we don't really see a point for anyone to roofie a member of another couple. Isn't the point to incapacitate someone so they can be taken advantage of without objection or protest? Who's other half would allow their loved one to be taken advantage of while they were unconscious?

NewEngland, hope these responses didn't scare you off from going to the club. Just like most vanilla clubs you have gone too, there are some precautions and drama to deal with, that will be the same for most Swingers clubs.

I do have a story to share that happened to my wife and I, that might be an interest to you. When my wife and I where first dating, we talked about attending the local swingers clubs. After going there a couple of times already, she was still precaution about possibly coming across someone we might know. Then one night while walking and checking in, I heard her say "Oh no"! She had a look of embarrassment on her face. She then introduced me to one of her previous "buddies" who was across the bar from us. She was a bet confused and amazed that two men (her words) who have her VAG in common, where there just talking to each other. She then needed a drink, and asked the lady behind the bar for a shot, at the same time she complimented how beautiful her breast where and wanted to touch them!! Then at that moment, I asked my wife a question. I asked her if she remembers the story about the time when we where "fuck buddies" and the time I flew to San Diego and bumped into one of my female "buddies". She said Ya? Then I introduced her to my previous "buddie", the bar tender she was fondling! :)

Moral of this true story, don't stress out about the possibilities, an awkward moment might end up a beautiful night!!

Layed not Laid, sorry..

If a couple goes to a swing club where 50 plus couples are, there's a good chance a couple will find a compatible couple to play with, just breath and relax.....Mary Jo

" I HAVE NEVER ONCE IN ALL THAT TIME HEARD OF ANYONE GETTING ROOFIED! "

Andrew, I must say our exposure doesn't seem as vast nor great as yours and we certainly don't go to lifestyle clubs just hand out under a 1-spot to drink and listen to music; we have local vanilla clubs that are NC entry and strip clubs for a nominal fee for added eye candy for music and drink.

Our exposure together, roughly 6 years going on 7.

Hotel take overs and hotel parties in Va, NC, Tn, Ky, Md, and Pa.

Clubs: Trapeze in Fort Lauderdale Fla, The Cottage and TJ's in Pa, Studio 58 in Frederick,Md. Gem's from Birmingham, Ala, Exotic Desires and Rocky Top in Knoxville, Tn. I will say that these clubs have hundreds to several hundreds of attendees show, unlike some of the clubs you specifically mentioned in the backwoods that have up to 20 people show on a good night.

Several house parties a year and recently hosted one of our own.

Now, with our changes in work schedules, we don't have the opportunity to travel as we did, but nonetheless, we would plan several outings monthly.

…...however...…… I must point out you said the same thing a couple years back about no exposure to and finding it insulting about others listing their profiles off limits to scat, pee and such. Well, now you have one more "unheard-of" to add to your list of inexperiences, which makes your overall exposure seem somewhat limited or comforted, not sure which. It wasn't about scaring anybody, it was about warning others about turning their back to their drink so they could be cautious, as it does happen to people in regular clubs as well and is not limited to just those particular places.

You have a magical night as well.

~Allen

888, Ok then I'll add a little more to your cautionary advice to the n00bs.

OP, Robin and I have been doing this for 14 years. We live in Central Ohio. We've been to clubs all over this region. There are 2 within a 15 minute drive of our home. We LOVE swinger clubs. We go to swinger clubs even on nights we have no intention of fucking anyone else because we're hooked on the BYOB, and the DJ will always play your requests.

We've been to all 4 current clubs in the Dayton/Cincinnati area, and 2 others in that area that no longer exist. We've been to one of the 2 clubs in Cleveland. We've been to the one in Canton OH. Muncie Indiana. 2 clubs in Ft. Wayne IN, the one that's there now, and another that doesn't exist anymore. @ of the clubs in Kentucky. One in West Virginia. One in North Carolina while we were on vacation.

We've been to hotel takeover parties all over this region as well. I'll spare you the exhaustive list.

We are regularly invited to house parties around this region. Gee, how does an asshole like me keep getting invited to house parties? ;)

We know a lot of swingers over a wide geographical area.

AND I HAVE NEVER ONCE IN ALL THAT TIME HEARD OF ANYONE GETTING ROOFIED!

I can't imagine that I'm atypical given my wide exposure to the midwestern swinger community, but what the hell, let's scare the n00bs anyway. Have a magical day!

After being to various winger clubs quite a few times, one thing that's for sure is that you will never know what will happen that night when you go in......That's a big part of the excitement and pleasure of going....So you and your partner have to be ready for things that may develop quickly and go where you may not have expected so it is important to really keep attention to your partners comfort level.....The guy will typically want to go faster than the woman when sexual opportunities arise...That's the biggest concern you should have when attending a club, to avoid a bad ending to what should be a pleasurable evening....

"A normal couple asked a normal question, and the thread went off the rails FAST. "

IT IS part of the discussion as a cautionary tip and a follow up what and how fast shit can happen when your back is turned. It's still within the parameter of the context of the thread, but then again, thanks for the one input, but I believe people know not to be assholes when looking for others.

~Allen

If you do what 888 listed, 69 will be in your future.....

It was meant to be a little humorous,,,,95% of normal, nice looking couples will get laid if they want to, .....Maybe things changed in the last couple years...

"Since your a couple just breath and you will get laid......"

Says the.....the....uhhhhh.....

I'm not sure what you are, so I should just stop here.

To the OP, that's not true. Swinger dating is more difficult as a couple looking for another couple because you're looking for a 4 way connection. It can be done, but it's more difficult than a 2 way connection.

A normal couple asked a normal question, and the thread went off the rails FAST.

To the OP, don't be an asshole, you'll do fine. You can be a dick, to a point, and that might help, but don't be an asshole. It's actually better to just go and learn the hard way than it is to ask advice, as you've just seen.

Since your a couple just breath and you will get laid......

New England,

Congratulations on making the decision to step out into the real-time swinger world. You are going to love it!

Follow the suggestions already given, and you should not have a problem.

Let people know that you are newbies. We personally don’t play with brand new couples, but we love chatting and trying to help folks who are experiencing the lifestyle for the first time. My wife is the kind of person who, once she’s learned that you are new, would hang out with you all night just to make sure you were ok.

Ninety nine percent of the people you’ll meet will be nice, or at the very least, harmless. As some of the comments in this thread illustrate, there are is always the possibility of encountering some bad actors. Take reasonable precautions to keep yourself safe.

Something I always recommend for new couples is that you set some hard limits for yourselves for the night. Be ready to walk away from anyone who tries to push you beyond your pre-set limits. As a newbie couple, it should be easy for you at any time to say: sorry, we are new, and we aren’t ready yet.

Rustic: Well, People don't really like to talk about these things and I certainly wouldn't lie about it. It is a reality it does happen because we have met and known others over the years that have had similar happen as well.

The backstory: A couple years back, I had left Mrs. 888 at our table to attend the restroom; our table was back to back with another along the wall. When I came back, the table was cleared of my empty bottles, except her drink bottle (2/3rds full) that had a lid on it and it had been moved toward the wall the table butted against; she was on the dance floor with the female half of a couple sitting shoulder to shoulder with us. The wall it was along was out of reach from anyone unless they leaned over from the isle, except from the male of that couple that was seated close enough that he was using the ashtray on our table. She came back a couple minutes later, we sat and talked with each other about potentials we were planning to approach as she finished her drink. Done, empty..... Then the female of that couple leaned over, touched her arm and whispered into her ear, inviting her to the dance floor again. He then leaned over towards me and we talked a little; he even verbally noted what I had drank so far, that I only had water for the evening, which I found odd. About 15 minutes went by before Mrs.888 came back, she was staggering, head kind of bobbing, laughing loudly and slurring badly. I asked if she was okay, her reply was, "oh my gosh, I'm so fucking drunk and they want to fuck us...... right now" (slurring). That was the flag and then the puzzle was quickly pieced together.

I excused us from the other couple and led Mrs. 888 down a hall that led away from the loudness of the club and outside to fresh air. After about 30 minutes of calming her down and her eventually throwing up, I asked how many drinks she had, she said, "just that one, but it really knocked me on my ass". I told her our home made 16oz screwdriver had two ounces of 90 proof vodka. About 30 seconds passed and she turned red in the face and clinched her fists. Now I had a mad slurring woman that wanted to punch somebody on my hands. We left shortly after she was able to compose herself. She slept the entire 2.5 hour drive home.

When we go out with our LS friends, she can easily put away two long island teas and just have a buzz. The last time I saw her like that night at the club, she had 3 fully loaded long island teas, two "unknown" to me shots and 4 dirty nipples, so I personally know a 16oz screwdriver was not going to do that. We pre-make our drinks at home with measuring cups and regulated pour tips, so regulation on mix and consumption is not an issue.

~Allen

888eatme888 this is the first time we have ever heard of someone being roofied at a lifestyle club. It is always a good idea to never leave a drink alone but the one place it should be "safe" is a location everyone is at to have sex in the first place. Our local club (BYOB) has a no drinks in the rooms policy so folks usually either finish things first or leave their cups with their cooler or with whatever other things they have. Then again except for the occasional new members everyone knows everyone else and they only allow select single males in the company of a couple who are responsible for them. That means they are few and far between with the last party only having one in attendance. It makes one really wonder how often this happens and in reality who actually would do such a thing in a place where everyone is there for sex willingly in the first place.