Some single males are gross

“ We try not to block single males but if they don't get the hint after we tell them no then they get blocked.”

I hope you realize that polite single males should respond to your “No, thanks,”
response, even though you do tell them you’re not interested. Their response should read something like this:

“ thank you for your reply. I understand that you’re not interested at this time. If you have some future interest, please do keep me in mind. Best regards,”.

Single men are not foolish creeps, jusT as couples aren’t all ignorant, arrogant. moronic jug heads.

—- SLO

Seem to have a lot more SMs reaching out to us lately (last month or so), especially on SLS's competitors site.

We try not to block single males but if they don't get the hint after we tell them no then they get blocked.

Nice look at this.. 2 of our favorites: one we have met all weekend locally.. and one who promises to show us a good time on the west coast ! Hmm decisions decisions..

Good morning !

@SFNative ~ "Hey I understood that reference" In my Captain America voice

In life in general, there are the few that create a stigma for the many. The group then gets a bad reputation based on the actions of the few. That has been well displayed over the past few years in many arenas outside of the lifestyle.
I try and take each person at their word and give them the due respect until they no longer deserve it. Unfortunately, as a SM, I understand and respect the wishes of married couples because of what they have experienced. I have had not so good experiences with couples but that does not deter me from wanting to meet other wonderful people that are out there. But I know what I am up against, and work to earn the respect of the couple or single lady so they fully know my intention.
These sites have changed over the last few years and not for the better. It is too hard to figure out who is real, and who is just playing around or trying to make money by luring people to other sites.

Yeah, married guys could benefit from a healthy dose of Fulghum and Barney, too.

BT

"And that is why most are single because they are assholes in real life and don't know how to treat a lady."

Is that the reason for the high divorce rate as well?

There are married couples of which one or both are assholes as well.....
Do they get passes cuz you want to fuck their partner?

I don’t think so- ...what year did you start using it?? Lol!

I also quote Barney, the purple dinosaur, not Fife or Rubble... Please and thank you are the magic words.

I suppose y’all have been doing that for years too? ;-)

BT

-Goofy AF, but strangely, it works

BT: “ What I’ve half-jokingly referred to as, All I need to know about swinging (and life) I learned in kindergarten.”

Hey, hey, hey! Did you steal that from us?!?

We’ve been saying that for years.

Kindergarten lessons: sharing toys, playing well with others, waiting your turn, listening, using your inside (sexy) voice

just a self absorbed guy

“And that is why most are single because they are assholes in real life and don't know how to treat a lady.”

Nah, they just become married assholes.

We’ve had our share of rude single guys contact us but an equal number of entitled, rude asshole married guys.

~Scamp

Sexynovacpl, no need for worries whatsoever. Despite the fact that I cringe, and I’ll bet you do, or did too when you were a SM, I agree that some just don’t get it and to Rustic’s point, people’s true colors come out over time, and after someone’s shown you theirs by being selfish and rude, they need to be excised from your life.

I also appreciate that you used the term goofball vs asshole, but can understand how the latter applies in Rustic’s case. Personally, I believe it’s developmental in its origin, linking back to how we are raised, educated, both formally and informally, and our life experiences; What I’ve half-jokingly referred to as, All I need to know about swinging (and life) I learned in kindergarten.

BT

And that is why most are single because they are assholes in real life and don't know how to treat a lady.

Just when we thought "Well some guys are not so bad" we have a situation come up with someone we met through here and have been having fun with for the past year. Anyway when we met the wife was well into pre-menopause with all that entails especially the unpredictability. Flash forward to a year later and it has gotten even more so plus there is the "extended" time of the month (she had one go for 4 weeks with 2 days off) and other things. Turns out there might be some additional conditions affecting this as a recent blood test showed some thyroid issues and a ultrasound showed something the doctor wants to check up on after her next cycle but I digress. Now he was made aware of this from the start and as her situation progressed he seemed to be very understanding especially of the fact my wife does not like to play during that time of the month (very important here). Anyway after having to alter plans both with him, those made with others, and even sitting out at a couple parties we decided to step back a little. We discussed not making "plans" but rather playing it by ear and meeting up the same day in hopes to still have fun and avoid the unexpected. That worked well twice then she had another "extended" monthly and we went 2 weeks without contacting him. During that time he contacted us 3 times asking if we were free the weekend (both weekends and for the second we had already said no before he asked again). Now everyone can be forgetful but that is why keeping your messages helps. After that we had another discussion (via messaging) about my wife's situation including the new found medical issues and everything saying we don't know when things will settle and we can meet up. He then said what we consider was one of the most disrespectful things anyone we have had the pleasure of having pleasure with has said. "That's what showers are for we could still meet up." I get it I really do you are horny and want sex but through all of this we have said the wife does not enjoy it while that is going on. We are not just here doing this for you but us as well and as frustrating as it is for you imagine what we are going through.

Yeah I know some single men may just be a lot more understanding (and we know a few) but most (enough to almost say all) sooner or later prove to be more interested in what they get versus what you want. BTW this is true for most males out there so I am not just singling out single men however it seems the male half of a couple is more "civilized" or dare I say "housebroken" than single males even ones that have been married or in a long term relationship. At least that has been our experience. We now have them blocked because to be honest while we welcome and enjoy adding a single male into the bedroom it quit simply is not worth putting up with the BS to find one especially when even after vetting them, getting to know them, and investing time they eventually show to be just like the ones you passed up.

BT

Sorry, I didn't mean to lump all single guys as bad in some way. Some are great and have a nice profile, like you. It's just that bunch of other guys who spoil it.

Before I met C several years ago, I was on here as a single guy, so I can relate. On the positive side, I figured if I stood out as having a decent profile and could write a polite, coherent message, I had a leg up on some goof-balls who are on here.

Your right BT not all are bad, Wish there was away to filter them out as we like sm but these dam young
ones are the biggest offenders that are to lazy to read. Wife says its because they couldn't get laid in a woman's prison lol

I think I was probably on that long list of yours, but definitely didn’t write, not that I’d ever send anyone a crude message if I had written.

I’d never defend the actions of idiots, yet as a SM, I always feel like I should apologize for them.

BT

We took a long break from SLS and forgot how annoying single males on here could be. We also are open to an MFM, so put "maybe" in our profile regarding single males when we updated it a bit ago. Next thing you know, we're getting lame to crude messages from single guys - only a few words and indicate they probably didn't even read our profile. Our "viewed you" is a long line of single guys. If they only knew that having a decent profile and writing a well considered message could well get them a meet with us. Yesterday, we changed our profile to block single guys. We'll just reach out to them if we decide to go that route.

Unfortunately, though it's not just single guys. It's also the male half of some couples. They can be just as crude sometimes.

“No brains can’t read.”

...or spell!

Those dumbasses!

BT

Whats wrong with these Dam single males, no brains can't read.

Just realize what young women went thru at bars and most likely everywhere when they went out....

It is a shame that there are guys on here that are down right rude and crude towards others, which I think is why an immediate red flag goes up and makes the good ones stereotyped. I have always replied to ones profile after reading it in full. My replies are ones that I would say face to face if I were to meet them out at a bar, always being open and honest about myself and always being respectful. I have always wondered if some of these guys actually talk to someone face to face in the manner in which they write a message. If they do, I am sure they have had more then one drink thrown in their face. Just my thoughts on the matter.

More often than gross, they are just plain lazy.

Lazy profiles. Lazy pictures. Lazy messages.

That isn't to say single women are broadly any less lazy, but they can afford to be; online dating is a buyer's market for women.

I was talking to a female friend of mine about her Bumble/Tinder experience, and she mentioned how overwhelming it wad curating all her matches.

I laughed and said something along the lines of "I'd be underwhelmed and suicidal about how few matches I get," she does the typical "No, way you are a catch" routine female friends always do.

So, I fired up a profile on both and let them sit for a week. I think I had 12 likes in an entire week. I'm not exactly Channing Tatum (he is a little shorter than me), but I clean up pretty nice. My experience was probably an above average one, but still pretty abysmal. When I relayed this information, she was kind of baffled by her brief glimpse into the male experience. "C'est la vie" I said to that.

"Am I this gross. " - We don't know because you have no public pictures of yourself. You are also 62 and at 5' 10" and 207 lbs, at least a little overweight. Not sure what age/s your going after, but that could be part of it. A lot of times we'll see people less than our age that will play with people younger than them, but not older.

One big improvement would be to have someone take a decent picture of you well dressed and make it your default pic. It doesn't need to show your face. If you can't do that then, some (many?) will assume you aren't really single and are doing this on the sly. If someone is going to risk playing with a cheater, it's likely going to be a younger hard-body type.