GandS
I can appreciate your comments. LTRs are unique as it is more then a lifestyle approach. There is something to be said for the bond that takes place, along woth the friendship and trust that develops.
LTRs are rare and in some aspects they take on a life of their own, often with a closed group of friends of similar interest..
Sound like you are fortunate to have found a lifestyle partner - Happy thoughts!
We have had a long term male friend for well over a year now. The only rub is that he isn't single. However, before anyone gets crazy about that you need to know that his wife is an invalid and he has complete freedom to pursue a sexual relationship independently. For all intents and these purposes he is single. We have enjoyed having him join us for dinner, dancing and of course sex.
It's not clear to us what this post was originally all about but we felt compelled to comment.
You could have a 10” cock made of platinum, that shot age reversing glitter, and you’d still be unfuckable.
LTRs are the best. I see two couples on a regular basis. One that live near me but moved a couple hours away (business). we stay in constant contact by phone, test, and see each other, though not as often as when they lived closer.
The other couple lives closer and we get together quite often.
Interesting to note, the LTRs I mention - we are more than just meet up for sex experiences. In both cases we've developed close relationship, mixing up vanilla and non vanilla activities.
It’s nice having that long term bond friendship with a couple. I’ve been friends with some of the same couples now for a few years , sometimes we don’t even play, just get together for a meal and conversation.
@Blak4white.... as others have already said, profoundly insightful.
Blak4White1on1 - perfectly stated.
Blak4White a very profound post!! Thanks for sharing!
All of this suggests that a lot has to do with maturity, with being of a certain age. The years do add perspective as much as experience. Selfishness can become less of a factor, certain other things gain in value as far as appreciation and importance, while it also becomes evident what is not important. Sex becomes less about reaching that orgasmic rush than it is about savoring every moment, every touch, every detail and nuance, both physically and psychologically. We recognize that foreplay begins in the connecting minds, long before any clothing is shed. And removing our clothes becomes part of the act, not just a hasty process in preparation. In the case where emotional connection is encouraged between a wife and her lover, maturity can provide a safe balance which leaves the marriage as well as the friendship intact. Unlike the typical swinger/SM encounter (which is still very fun), in the longer term friendship, I know more about the husband. I know what makes him smile or laugh or ponder deeply. I know how much he loves his wife, how much he loves having her pleased, and observing her in the throes of coital passion. And as I am laying with his wife, touching her naked flesh, kissing her lips as my erection throbs inside her, I know how she relishes such amorous attention. I know how much of a wholesome, friendly woman she is in public, the jewel she is among her family and friends. And I know how precious this hidden, kinky side of herself is so necessary to her in fulfilling all that she is.
As younger people in this lifestyle, we didn't think about these things, and we may not have cared about the thrilling dimensionality of this sort of uncommon social connection which begins from the inside out. It's quite special.
OMG, I loved my WEBTV and WEBTV Plus. When I by things and don't want to give my real email I give my WEBTV address. Now I'm aging myself.
Back in my 20's (Web TV days) I hooked up with a local couple in their 40's. Met her for dinner first to see if we clicked. We did, so we set up a play time at their house.
I would show up, we would all talk on the couch for a while, then her and I would go back to the bedroom. After we had time to get started, he would come in, stay completely clothed, and just sit in the corner while we went at it. He would often interject saying what he liked, getting excited with what he saw, etc. Overall he didn't say a whole lot. He just enjoyed the show. She made a LOT of noise, but her teeth often got in the way with her BJ's. lol Always plated safe when doing intercourse.
They were pretty much ready any time I called, but after a few months I wanted to concentrate on putting my energy into finding an actual long term relationship... so I shared that, and we went our separate ways. The term 'Bull' wasn't popular yet, and is kind of tacky anyway. I would just go over, and we'd have our fun. 100% respectful and polite. No putting anyone down or making anyone purposely feel like a 'cuck'. No attitude, just a good time!
That is what we are looking now we used to have that we likes long term we are not into Random sex.
This is actually how I got started with Swinging, it started when a co-workers wife came out to me as a swinger while I was on a business trip with him and she came along. She flat out seduced me while at the hotel bar, no panties, sun dress whispered in my ear their little secret, then took my hand and put it on her leg as she kissed my ear, and told me how she would love to have her husband and I spend the next couple of nights just satisfying her as many times as we could all handle and if I was game for it he was waiting back up in the room. I was married at the time but so turned on by the idea that I gave in. We had hung out a while before that and all liked each others company, there was something about having two guys that kept us all going, I must have cum at least 15 times over the next two days and her husband was right there with me, and she was highly orgasmic, just thinking about hearing her cum and the pulsing of her body in the throws of orgasm around my cock is getting me hard all over again. They introduced me to the site, and her husband and I were paired at work so for the next 4 years she would join on business trips often and we were long term friends. They have since retired to Florida so I do not get to see them as often as I would like.
Where to begin.....
My wife and I have been in the LS for 12 or so years. We have evolved greatly from where we started to where we are now, which is mostly solo play vs couples. Don't get me wrong, we very much enjoy couples, but we have a very difficult time finding that all important 4 way attraction and chemistry, and frankly couples that are on the same page. We have a couples profile and I have this SM profile.
I've had a few long term relationships (and relationship is the word to use) with couples that were just wonderful. Mutual trust, attraction, and oh such chemistry in the bedroom. Vanilla times to together were as common and LS time together. It's been some time now since I've been able to find that again, and that's what I look for.
I and not looking to notch the bed post. I need to have attraction both mentally and physically. Early on, I'd take all offers and quickly found that those encounters left me feeling flat and empty. That was a short lived approach.
While the responsibility to be kind, caring, and honest and work to develop a genuine rapport falls to all involved, I feel it is incumbent on the SM to understand the dynamics the couple is looking for, what the boundaries are, watch for a changing landscape, and to support their experience.
I to have had and do today several - gals and couple - who are regular, ongoing play friends. Ones in the past ended because of relocations but we still are in touch. It takes patience and effort to find, but then very well worth it for all!
As a single male, I can attest that I have had two such relationships (the latter is still ongoing). The first one ended when they moved due to his work situation. The miles make it impossible to meet, but we do stay in contact to this day.
The latter I meet locally, and we enjoy each other's company both sexually and vanilla. We are a good mix sexually and vanilla. We make no bones about who we are when we are together when we are in public, our closeness may be obvious to some, to others it may no be so. The bottom line is we connect on more than a sexual level, enjoy each other's company. We look forward to seeing one another be it sexually or vanilla and always have a great time. Our meeting up was every other week, but now it is about once a month as they have moved a couple of hours away.
We share the time between my visiting them or they visiting me. One thing we don't do though..... we never meet one on one. We agreed on that up front, in fact I would submit what makes us work is that we had several discussions and laid the groundwork early in our relationship. If we schedule a meeting it is always the three of us. When it comes to sexual activity, we have been known to add a few more people for play times. More is always fun but our special times of the three of us together is just that, special.
Bottom line, we are out there, and yes we are hard to find, partly because I feel that we are not your normal single male. I am not interested in in the notch post syndrome and prefer quality over quantity,
Hello and good afternoon.
I just read your and then looked at your profile. I am speechless. The Mrs. is absolutely stunningly sexy and gorgeous. I just wished I lived closer. You are both a great couple.
Thank you
As a single guy who has been doing this for a bit, I have some thoughts about this.
I love making friends with a couple, and playing with them, pleasing the wife with and for the husband. It is a very tricky bond to navigate. To be part of their relationship, but respectful of it at the same time. Feelings get involved, and occasionally things get muddy. But honest communication helps a lot. Being upfront. It can lead to a long lasting and fun time for all. Of course life and society get in the way some. And as much as we wish it would, nothing last forever.
Fun_ItalianCple - to the Female. We need to clone you! You are the quintessential "Hotwife" in every way Couples that open their relationship to another male are amazing... and when it leads to long term, the best!
We have one particular SM that was one of the first we played with who lives just over two hours from us. Our first time to connect with him was 2004. Although not what I would call "routine", every couple or three years we re-connect, so several times over nearly 20 years. There is another guy about 2 hours in the opposite direction in a similar FWB situation, but that one has only ran about a decade or so. The wife is friends with both on FB and they stay in touch with "random" bouts of debauchery thrown in!
I’m more opt to find a long term couple to build trust with
I can't just fuck on demand. I like to get to know the person first. Getting to know them is half the fun. The other half comes naturally with friendship and trust. I think long term just makes so much sense and heightens sexually and pleasure.
I know some want to just walk in and have sex, but I find having a great friendship with your partners only makes it better. I can't even walk into a room and start banging somebody. I want to talk, flirt, drink, dance, laugh, and have a good time before we ever get to the bedroom. It's probably why I like house and private parties more than anything. My first hour or two is just chatting up people and getting to know them. Finding out what intrigues me and then the build up has us almost finished before we start.
However it is the hardest thing to find in the lifestyle. It not only requires the other people to want a friendship as well. But it tests the boundaries of what's friendly flirting and sex and "is this man trying to take my wife from me/trying to take me from my husband" vibes..
But once it happens.. It's so amazing. I love nothing more to come please a woman and let her enjoy everything she likes about the both of us.
I have been so lucky and fortunate to have had long-term relationships with a few couples....I prefer a long term steady involvements
Dr Big, Funitalian, Bottoms, Hump: We love your experiences and how positive they have been. We are blessed as well by great single guys we like and share benefits. Rock on, you sexy, positive swinger couples - and your single guys!
